Kitabı oku: «Regency Innocents», sayfa 7

‘Why is your hat on the floor? Is your dresser not in attendance?’

‘I have not rung for her. I don’t want her!’ she snapped. Since he was already disappointed in her, she had nothing to lose by admitting she could not live up to his exacting standards. ‘If I wish to throw my hat on the floor and … and stamp on it, then I have no wish to have her tutting at me as though I am a naughty child. It is my hat, after all, and I can do with it as I see fit!’

Instead of reprimanding her for her childish outburst, he merely smiled and remarked, ‘I’ll buy you another one,’ tossing the crumpled headgear to the footman as he exited the rooms.

‘I don’t want another one,’ Heloise said, perversely irritated by his magnanimity in the face of her tantrum. ‘I am never getting on another horse again as long as I live.’

‘I thought you scoffed at people who disliked falling from horses. I seem to remember you saying—’

‘Yes, I remember very well what I said. If the horse had been trotting, or even walking, it might not have been so humiliating. But the horrid creature was standing perfectly still when I fell off. If I can fall off a stationary horse, which is being held at the head by a groom, I cannot think how much worse it will be should the brute try to move.’

‘Are you badly hurt?’ Charles frowned, suddenly wondering whether her tears and her evident discomfort might stem from more than wounded pride. ‘Should I send for a doctor?’

So, after a perfunctory check, he was going to palm her off on another person? If they had the relationship a husband and wife ought to have, he would be running his hands over her bruises right now, assuring himself that nothing important was damaged. Instead of which he had handed her a drink, with a mocking smile twisting his lips.

‘I don’t need a doctor.’ She sighed. I need a husband. A husband who would put his arms round me and tell me everything is all right, that he is not ashamed of his stupid little wife, or disappointed in her failure to help poor Robert.

Mutinously, she went to the bellrope and tugged on it viciously. ‘I wish to change out of these clothes now,’ she informed him. And take a bath. Unless there is anything else you wish to say to me?’

Charles bowed politely, remarking, ‘Only that I hope, when your temper has cooled a little, you will endeavour to mend fences with Robert. I have invited him to dine with us this evening. It is the first time that he has agreed to do so. I would not wish it to be his last.’

Heloise glared at the door through which he departed. Not a word of thanks for her efforts, abortive though they had been. Only a stern warning to watch her behaviour at dinner this evening, so as not to offend his precious brother any further. He had not even bothered to find out what the boor had said to upset her!

Nothing she ever did would please him.

Very well, then, she would start pleasing herself. She tore at the silver buttons of her riding habit with trembling fingers. She would dismiss the horrible dresser who looked down her nose at her. As a pair of housemaids came in, carrying towels and cans of hot water, she eyed them speculatively. Her husband seemed to employ dozens of staff. If she could not find one amongst them with whom she could strike up a tolerable relationship, then she would advertise for an experienced lady’s maid and begin to conduct interviews. If nothing else, it would give her something to fill the endless monotony of her days.

And as for tonight … Oh, Lord! She sank into the steaming fragrant water of her bath and bowed her head over her raised knees. Charles would be watching her like a hawk. Robert would resent her for being the catalyst that had forced the two men to eat at the same table. She would be like a raw steak being fought over by two butcher’s dogs.

By the time she entered the little salon Robert and Charles were already there, sitting on either side of the fireplace, sipping their drinks in a silence fraught with tension. Both, to her surprise, looked relieved to see her.

‘I believe I owe you an apology,’ Robert said, struggling to his feet.

She merely raised one eyebrow as she perched on the edge of the third chair which had been set before the hearth.

All right, dash it! I know I owe you an apology. I should never have used such language to a female …’

‘Not even a French female?’ she replied archly, accepting the drink the footman handed to her. ‘Who is not even of noble birth, is an enemy of your country, and most probably a spy to boot?’

Flushing darkly, Robert muttered, ‘If I said any of those things to you this morning …’

‘If?’

‘All right. I admit I said a lot more besides the swearing I have reason to apologise for! But don’t you think it is pretty disgusting behaviour to laugh at a cripple?’

‘Oh, I was not laughing at you, Robert.’ Heloise reached a hand towards him impulsively, her eyes filling with tears. ‘No wonder you got so cross, if that was what you thought. It would indeed have been the most unforgivable behaviour if that was so!’

‘But you were laughing …’

‘It was the horse! When you went to climb onto him from the right side it looked so surprised. I have never seen such an expression on an animal’s face before.’ A smile twitched her lips at the memory. And it turned to stare at you, and it tried to turn round to place you on what it thought was the correct side, and the groom was dodging about under its head, and you were clutching onto the saddle to stop from falling off the mounting block …’

‘I suppose it must have looked pretty funny from where you were sitting,’ Robert grudgingly admitted. ‘Only you have no idea how I felt—too damned clumsy to mount a slug like that, when I’ve always been accounted a natural in the saddle.’

‘I’m sorry, Robert. But you have to admit I received just punishment for my thoughtlessness.’

He barked out a harsh laugh. Aye. You should have seen her, Walton. Laughed herself right out of the saddle. Lost her balance and landed on the cobbles at my feet …’

‘With you swearing down at me while I was struggling to untangle all those yards of riding habit from my legs …’

And the grooms not knowing where to look, or how to keep their faces straight …’

‘It sounds better than the pantomime,’ Charles put in dryly. ‘Ah, Giddings, it is good to see you back with us. I take it your presence indicates that our dinner is ready?’

Charles had tactfully arranged for the meal to be brought to a small round table set in the alcove formed by the bay windows, so that Robert had very little walking to do.

Linney took a position behind Robert’s chair. When Charles’ footman approached him with a tureen of soup, the man took it from him, ladling a portion into a bowl for his master himself. For the first time it occurred to Heloise just how difficult it must be to eat a meal with only one arm, and how demeaning it must be for a man in his prime to have to rely on someone else to cut up his food for him. How he must hate having others watching the proof of his disability.

Desperate to introduce some topic of conversation—anything to break the strained silence which reigned at the table—she asked Giddings, ‘Did I not meet you in Paris?’

Although he was somewhat surprised to be addressed, the butler regally inclined his head in the affirmative.

‘How was your trip back to England? I hope your crossing was smooth?’

‘Indeed, once I was at sea I felt heartily relieved, my lady,’ he unbent enough to admit.

‘Did you dislike France so much?’

The butler looked to his lordship for a cue as to how he should answer. Instead, Charles answered for him.

‘You have evidently not heard the news, my lady. Bonaparte has escaped from Elba. On the very eve of our marriage, he landed at Cannes with a thousand men and began his march on Paris.’

‘Damn the fellow!’ Robert put in. ‘Has there been much fighting? King Louis must have sent troops to intercept him?’

Charles again gestured to Giddings, which the butler interpreted correctly as permission to tell his tale himself.

‘The last I heard, every regiment sent for the purpose of arresting him joined him the minute they saw him in person.’

‘It is no surprise, that,’ Heloise said darkly. ‘He has a way with the soldiers that makes them worship him.’

‘By the time I reached Calais,’ Giddings continued, ‘fugitives from Paris were catching up with me, telling tales of the desperate measures they had taken to get themselves out of the city before he arrived. The price of any sort of conveyance had gone through the roof.’

‘Thank heavens we married when we did,’ Charles remarked. ‘Else we might have been caught up in that undignified scramble.’

‘Is all you can think of your precious dignity?’ Robert retorted. ‘And how can you—’ he rounded on Heloise ‘—be so bacon-brained as to worship that Corsican tyrant?’

‘I did not say I worship him!’ Heloise snapped. First Charles had made light of the convenience of their marriage, and now Robert had jumped to a completely false conclusion about her. ‘Do you think I want to see my country back in a state of war? Do you think any woman in France is ready to see her brothers and sweethearts sacrificed to Bonaparte’s ambition? It is only men who think it is a fine thing to go about shooting each other!’

‘Now, steady on, there,’ Robert said, completely taken aback by the vehemence of her reply, and the tears that had sprung to Heloise’s eyes. ‘There’s no need to fly into such a pucker …’

‘Not at the dining table,’ put in Charles.

‘Oh, you!’ She flung her napkin down as she leapt to her feet. ‘All you care about is manners and appearances. Men in Paris might be fighting and dying, but all you can do is frown because I speak to a servant as if he is a real person, and say what I really think to your so rude beast of a brother!’

‘This is neither the time nor place—’

‘When will it ever be the time or the place with you, Charles?’ she cried. Then, seeing all hope torn from her—not only for her marriage, but also for her country—she burst into sobs and left the room.

For a few moments the brothers sat in an uneasy silence.

‘Dammit, Walton,’ Robert said at last, flinging his spoon down with a clatter. ‘I didn’t mean to upset her so.’

‘I dare say she is anxious over the safety of her parents,’ Charles replied abstractedly. Did she really think he was so shallow all he cared about was good manners? ‘Giddings, give Her Ladyship an hour to calm down, then take a tray up to her room. As for you—’ he turned to Robert with a cool look. ‘—I suggest you finish your meal while you consider ways to make amends for insulting my wife and making her cry for the second time in one day.’

Chapter Seven

‘Charles, you will never guess what has happened!’ Heloise greeted her husband, when he came in to bid her goodnight several nights later.

She was not clutching the sheets nervously to her chest for once, Charles observed. Sadly, the robe which matched the gossamer-fine nightgown she wore was fastened demurely across her breasts, rather than lying provocatively across the ottoman. Though she was getting used to him visiting her room, she had no intention of inviting him into her bed.

Still, it was a small step in the right direction. There were other indications that she was gaining confidence in her position as his wife, too. She had ordered some lower footmen to rearrange her furniture without asking his permission. She had dismissed the dresser and the maid he had engaged for her. Then, as though wondering just how far she dared push him, she had promoted the scrubby little girl who cleaned the grates and lit the fires to the position of her maid.

She had then gone to Cummings and asked how she might go about doing some personal shopping.

Was that what had put the sparkle in her eyes tonight? Discovering from his secretary what a generous allowance he had arranged for her to have?

He took his seat at her bedside with a vague feeling of disappointment.

‘Robert is going to take me to Vauxhall Gardens to see the fireworks! Is that not wonderful?’

His disappointment evaporated. Her pleasure stemmed from mending a quarrel with his brother rather than a so far concealed streak of avarice.

‘He said that he cannot take me anywhere by daylight, but if we kept to shadowy walks, so that nobody can raise objections to the state of his face, it might not be too bad. Charles, this is something I do not understand.’ Her brow puckered with confusion. ‘Nobody looks askance at a soldier on the boulevards of Paris, no matter how grotesque his injuries!’

‘But you have had conscription in France for many years. Everybody feels more personally involved in the war. Anyone’s brother or husband could easily suffer the same fate as those poor wretches.’ He sighed. ‘Heloise, you must understand that most people are basically selfish. They come to town to enjoy themselves. They want to gossip and flirt and dance. Seeing a man like Robert is a reminder that life can be ugly and brutal. And they don’t want reminders that outside their charmed circle men are fighting and dying to ensure their freedoms.’

Heloise felt a twinge of guilt. She herself had become so preoccupied with her husband, and how she could win his approval, that she had not spared Bonaparte a thought for days.

‘I trust you have not fixed tomorrow evening for your outing to Vauxhall?’ Charles frowned. It had suddenly occurred to him that it would look very odd if her first outing in public was taken in the company of her brother-in-law. He rapidly reviewed the entertainments available to him for the next evening.

And wondered why he had never thought of it before.

‘You will be accompanying me to the theatre.’ It had worked well for them in Paris. Why should it not work here?

‘I … I will?’ Finally, finally he was going to permit her to appear in public as his bride!

And people would look at how small and plain she was, and wonder why on earth he had married her when he could have had any woman for the lifting of his finger.

Charles watched the joy drain from her face.

‘Is the primrose satin ready?’ he asked tersely, refusing to voice his hurt.

It was not her fault she regarded an outing with him as a duty to be borne, when a trip to Vauxhall Gardens with his half-brother filled her with eager anticipation.

When she nodded, he said, ‘Wear it tomorrow.’ Without further comment, he gave her the kiss which was always the prelude to leaving her room.

It was only after he had gone that she allowed herself to feel resentful that he had not bothered to thank her for getting Robert to venture out of doors. Nobody else had succeeded in so much as rousing him out of his rooms for months. But could Charles unbend towards her enough to applaud her achievement? Not he!

But she still, foolishly, studied his face for some sign of approval as she descended the stairs the following evening, dressed according to his dictates. She felt a little uncomfortable in the high-waisted gown which would have left her arms completely bare were it not for the matching gloves that came past her elbows. The neckline glittered with the most intricate beadwork Heloise had ever seen. The motif of thistle-heads and leaves was picked up in the self-coloured stitching on her gloves, and repeated around the three flounces on her skirts.

‘Come into my study for a moment before we leave,’ he said, crooking his finger imperiously. His guarded expression told her nothing. ‘I have something I wish to give you.’

She followed him, her stomach feeling as though a nest of snakes had taken up residence there. She was thrilled he was taking her out, desperate to be a credit to him, terrified she would let him down, and agonisingly conscious of every single one of her physical deficiencies.

Walking to his desk, he opened a large, square leather case which had been lying on it, and pushed it towards her across the polished mahogany surface. Inside, nestling on a bed of black velvet, was a parure consisting of necklace, bracelet, earrings and an aigrette of pale yellow gems, in a rather heavy and elaborate setting of gold. From another box, which he produced from his pocket, he took a matching ring.

‘I wished to have given you this sooner, but on returning to London and examining it I found it needed cleaning.’

‘Oh?’ Her eyes filled with tears as he slid the ring, which fitted perfectly, onto her finger. He had bought Felice a ring that matched her eyes. When he had given it to her, he had said no jewel could compare with them. He had merely had some old baubles he’d had to hand cleaned up for his plain and undeserving wife.

Still, at least she understood now why he had ordered her to wear the primrose satin. There were not many fabrics that could complement such unusually coloured gems as the ones he lifted from the box and fastened in her ears.

‘Perfect,’ he said, standing back to admire the effect of the earrings glittering against the curtain of his wife’s dark hair.

Heloise stiffened her spine, stifling her momentary pang of self-pity. She had always known she was a second-best wife. Of course she would only get second-hand jewels! What had she expected? That her husband would begin to act out of character and forget that she was not the woman he had wanted to marry?

He was being very kind, considering the way she had acted since being installed in his home. He had never, for example, upbraided her for the scene she had created at dinner, when she knew such behaviour was what he deplored above all else. He had merely sent her food up to her room.

Because he was, she suddenly realised, a kind man underneath those chillingly controlled manners. It was why she had never really been able to stay afraid of him for longer than a minute at a time. Why she had been able to confide in him from the very first. She had even been secure enough to give way to the childish temper tantrums that her brother had predicted would drive any husband to give her a beating.

Charles would never beat her. He did not, she saw with a sinking heart, care enough about her to lose that glacial self-control.

‘I couldn’t have you going out without any jewellery, could I?’ he said, fastening the necklace round her throat.

‘No, I suppose not,’ she replied. He might not care about her much, but he cared about his own reputation. His Countess could not appear in public without adequate adornment. The dress, the jewels—they were just the costume that made her look the part she was playing.

Charles was rather perplexed by Heloise’s response. He had just hung diamonds worth a king’s ransom around her neck, and instead of going into raptures she seemed weighed down.

Could she be nervous at suddenly having so much wealth displayed upon her person? She had never owned much jewellery before.

Nor wanted it. She had not even been tempted to try on the emerald ring that had been her sister’s.

‘These are yours by right as my wife, you know, Heloise.’ The set of yellow diamonds had been in his family for generations, handed down to each new bride upon her wedding—except for the ring, which was given upon the occasion of the betrothal. ‘It never felt right that you had to wear that ring I bought in Paris.’

‘I shall never wear it again,’ she vowed. It must remind him of all he had lost! And while she had been complaining to herself of all that she did not have, she had entirely forgotten that her husband was still trying to recover from his broken heart. He was so good at disguising his emotions that it took moments like this to remind her how much he must still be hurting.

‘What are we going to see at the theatre tonight?’ she said, deciding that he would be more comfortable if they talked about trivial matters.

‘The beau monde,’ he quipped, taking her arm and leading her to the door. He was glad he had taken that moment to reassure her. Now that she had got over her initial reluctance to accept the family heirlooms, she might even be able to enjoy herself a little. ‘As in Paris, we go to the theatre to see who is in the audience, not what is being performed upon the stage. I expect that during the intervals persons wishing for an introduction to my new Countess will besiege our box. They will probably think,’

he remarked dryly, ‘that they will be able to get to me through you. I hope you will not be taken in.’ He frowned. ‘It would be best if you did not associate with anyone without checking their credentials with me first.’

Heloise was virtually silent all evening. At first, Charles wondered if he had said something to offend her. She had lifted her chin as he’d handed her to her seat, and stared fixedly at the stage throughout the first act. Fortunately, this had left her oblivious to the stir her appearance, decked in the Walton diamonds, had created.

Gradually, he recognised that this was the Heloise he had first become acquainted with. The quiet, reserved girl that nobody noticed. Who observed but did not participate. This public Heloise was a far cry from the termagant who yelled at his brother, flounced out of rooms, slammed doors, and rattled on without pausing to draw breath.

He welcomed her return when they got into the carriage to go home.

‘Charles,’ she breathed, leaning forward and tapping his knee with her ivory-handled fan. ‘Who was that dreadful man—the great big dark one who accosted us in the corridor during the interval?’

He smiled wryly. He had assumed it would be easier to control exactly whom he permitted to approach her if they went for a stroll, rather than sitting passively in their box and letting the importunate besiege them.

‘Lord Lensborough,’ he replied, no doubt in his mind as to who she meant.

The Marquis had stood directly in their path, blocking their progress. And when he had said, Allow me to felicitate you upon your marriage,’ his hostility had been unmistakable.

‘Is he one of the family you won’t speak to because of what they did to Robert?’

‘Far from it. If anything, he regards himself as Robert’s champion. His own brother, who serves in Robert’s former regiment, was so concerned about the Turkish treatment I would mete out, he wrote begging Lensborough to watch over him.’

‘Oh. I am so sorry.’ Heloise laid one gloved hand upon her husband’s sleeve.

‘For what?’ It was ridiculous, he reflected with a frown, that his spirits should lift just because she had forgotten herself so far as to reach out and touch him.

‘That people should so misunderstand you. What do they think you mean to do with Robert? Is he not your brother? Your heir?’

‘Alas, from Lord Lensborough’s reaction this evening, I fear they suspect that I mean to cut him out by siring an heir of my own. Through you.’

‘Well, that just goes to show,’ she said, snatching back her hand, remembering his reaction when she had made such an impulsive gesture once before, ‘how silly they are.’ Couldn’t they see how devoted Charles was to his brother? Didn’t they understand how outraged he had been by the way his guardians had tried to cut him out of the succession?

Charles sighed. The reminder that she would one day have to face this distasteful duty as a wife had brought about an instant withdrawal.

But at least when he went to her room later, to bid her goodnight, she seemed to be in good spirits.

‘Thank you for this evening, Charles,’ she said prettily, when he bent to bestow a chaste salutation on her forehead. ‘I did enjoy it.’

‘Really?’ He frowned. ‘I thought you seemed … abstracted.’

‘Oh, well …’ She fidgeted nervously with the ties of her robe, her cheeks flushing pink as she averted her eyes from his.

Ah! She was relieved it was over. But she did not wish to wound him by confessing as much.

She wanted him gone. Very well, he would oblige her! He would not force his unwelcome presence on her a moment longer. Turning on his heel, he stalked from the room.

Heaving a sigh of relief, Heloise flung back the covers and went to the desk which she had converted to a drawing table. She had nearly given the game away then. It was just that there had been so many odd people at the theatre. And the knowledge that there was, at last, a fresh sheaf of drawing paper and a selection of really good-quality pencils hidden in a box beneath her bed was like a tonic fizzing through her veins. Now that she was a countess, with an army of staff at her disposal, she did not have to search the shops for what she wanted. She simply sent her maid, Sukey, with a list, and voilà ! After an hour or so the girl returned with exactly what she requested! And, since Sukey was so grateful for the meteoric rise in her status, she would rather cut her own throat, she had breathed dramatically, than ever betray Her Ladyship’s confidence.

Heloise only felt a small twinge of conscience for continuing with a pastime Charles frowned upon. So long as he did not find out, it could not hurt him.

And so many ideas had flooded to her while she had been studying the crowds tonight. Beau monde! She scoffed as she pulled a stool to her desk and lit the two lamps she had placed there for moments such as this. There was nothing beau about the manners of some of those people! They ignored the efforts of the actors upon the stage for the most part, which was rude, since they had clearly gone to a great deal of effort for the entertainment of an audience that was interested only in its own members. Except for certain of the men, when the pretty young dancers came on. Then it was all tongues hanging out and nudging elbows, and comments which she was certain were coarse, though fortunately she had not been able to hear them. And as for that obnoxious marquis, who harboured such uncharitable thoughts towards both Charles and herself … well! She had seen the plump little blonde sitting beside him in his own private box, giving him sheep’s eyes. A woman who was clearly not his wife. And he had the temerity to look askance at her !

Dawn was filtering through her curtains before Heloise began to yawn. Her excitement had driven her to fill page after page with initial sketches. Later, when she had the interminable hours of daylight to fill, she would add the detail and bring the scenes to life with judicious touches of watercolour paint. Yes … She yawned again, sloughing off her robe and letting it drop to the floor. There was much to be said about an evening spent at the English theatre.

And tonight the pleasure gardens of Vauxhall would provide even more material for her portfolio.

Robert was to dine with them both before taking her out. Charles had sent a note to inform her.

This time there were no arguments. There was scarcely any conversation at all. It was as though all three of them were determined to say nothing that might spark another confrontation.

Eventually, Charles remarked, ‘I shall not be dining at home for the next few evenings, Lady Walton. I warned you before we married that I have an interest in politics. And at this particular time, with Bonaparte on the rampage again, you will appreciate that I must be busy in the affairs of my country.’

Of course she understood. In Paris, it was in the private salons of influential hostesses that statesmen decided which line they were going to take in public. Similar meetings must go on in London.

She nodded. Robert scowled.

She was not surprised when, the second they got into Walton’s private carriage, which he had put at their disposal for the outing, Robert blurted, ‘He’s not going to back those fools who want to try and appease Bonaparte, is he?’

‘I do not know,’ she shrugged. They never talked about anything. ‘All I know is what you heard him say. Charles will be too busy to bother with me for a while.’

Robert looked perplexed. ‘I’m sure he did not mean that. You must admit, Bonaparte escaping like that, and winning over the army that was sent to arrest him, has caused the deuce of a panic all over Europe.’

She turned bleak eyes in his direction, though she could only make out his silhouette. Somehow, in the darkness of the jolting carriage, it was easy to let her hurt spill out. ‘It is not a question of him suddenly being busy. He has never wanted to spend more time with me than he has to.’

‘Cold-hearted wretch,’ she heard Robert growl.

‘No, you must not say such things,’ Heloise protested. ‘Really, he is most kind to me …’

‘Kind! To leave you alone in your room, night after night, while he goes out on the town? Oh, don’t think because I stay in my rooms I don’t know what goes on in this house. The way he neglects you. Look.’ He leaned forward, his earnest expression illuminated for a second as they passed under a street lamp. ‘I may not be able to introduce you to the elevated set my brother belongs to, but I do have friends in town. You’d probably enjoy yourself a deal more with them, anyway, than at the stuffy ton gatherings Walton frequents. I’ll …’ He drew in a breath, as though steeling himself to go on. ‘I’ll introduce you to them. I will not,’ he stipulated, ‘escort you to picnics, or go boating, or anything of that nature. But once you get to know a few people you’ll have no shortage of invitations to all the sorts of things females of your age enjoy.’

Sitting back, and running a hand over his perspiring brow, he grumbled, ‘Why Walton hasn’t seen to it himself beats me.’

Heloise was torn. On the one hand she wanted to defend Charles’ actions. And yet there was no doubt she could use Robert’s misapprehension to get him to renew contact with the friends he had shut himself away from for far too long.