Kitabı oku: «The Letters of the Duke of Wellington to Miss J., 1834-1851», sayfa 8
CHAPTER IX.
MISUNDERSTANDINGS
The correspondence for 1846 begins smoothly, with no warning of the storm that was to burst before the year was out. From the Duke's first letter, it is evident that Miss J. had continued her epistles steadily, undeterred by the tartness of the Duke's last note, of December 3d. His first billet of the New Year is friendly in tone, while the brusqueness of the second quoted is explained by her comment thereupon. From the knowledge gained of her through her letters one can imagine what must have been the pious querulousness of her "remark."
"1846.—The first letter from the Duke in this year is dated Jan. 7th, wherein he writes—'I have received your letter of the 4th Inst., having before received many for which I really have not had the time to enable me to write and thank you as I ought to have done, as my sincere and heartfelt acknowledgments are due to you for your continued kindness towards me.'
"I presume judging by the Duke's next letter that I had made some remark concerning his silence, as he writes therein dating it Jan. 14th—'I have scarcely time for rest or meals. You must excuse me! I cannot do it! Surely patience is a Christian virtue enjoined to us by the precepts as well as by the example of our Saviour.'"
Biographers of the Duke mention his power of going for hours without food, and then atoning for his abstinence by a hearty meal. His usual daily routine was to rise at seven, and go out of doors at once, returning to breakfast at nine. He ate no lunch, and dined at seven. When much pressed with work, he was accustomed to have his dinner served on a small round oaken table in the library, where he ate alone, surrounded by his papers. His correspondence was enormous, owing to his practice of answering all his letters himself. He occasionally availed himself of a lithographed form in reply to some correspondents, and also sometimes adopted a sharpness of tone in answering irrelevant communications, in the hope that he might thus hinder their authors from writing again. As a rule, however, a courteous letter was apt to receive a courteous reply. The narrowness of Miss J.'s mental horizon is nowhere more strikingly shown than by her inability to comprehend the whirl of business that must have made life, to a man of the Duke of Wellington's conscientiousness, a ceaseless round of fatiguing labor.
"In the Duke's next letter, dated Feb. 4th, he writes—'I have received many letters from you and I am really ashamed of being under the necessity of repeating over again what I have stated so repeatedly, that I have not leisure time to acknowledge the receipt of and thank you for each of your letters when it reaches me.'
"In the Duke's next letter, dated March 13th, he writes—'I don't know whether you ever read the letters which I write to you. I doubt it, because I cannot make out how it happens that you do not notice or believe what I tell you in every one that I write, namely, that my time is so much occupied that I have scarcely time for the rest which is necessary.'
"In the Duke's next letter, dated March 20th, he writes—'I have received all your letters, the last this day, dated Wednesday, March 18th. I should have answered the two earlier ones at the time I received them if I had had one moment's leisure.'"
Strathfieldsaye, April 17, 1846.
My dear Miss J.—I have just now received your Note of the 15th and I am very sorry to observe that I have again offended you by quitting London without going to pay you a visit; and because I have not acknowledged the receipt of some late letters received from you.
I wish I could induce you to believe that the disposal of my time does not depend upon myself; whether to pay visits or to write.
I have received all your letters, but have not written answers to them; or to thank you for them; because I really have not had Time.
I am obliged to you for having informed me that you intend to quit your Residence on Saturday that is to-morrow.
If you will let me know where you will reside in future I will go to pay you a visit if I should have one Moment of Leisure.
I don't recollect to have sent my Servant with a letter to Mr. L.
If he took one there, I conclude it was because when I gave it to put into the Post, the Hour was passed at which it would be received at the Post Office and he took it to the Gentleman to whom it was directed.
But this is mere Conjecture. I know nothing about the matter.
Ever, My Dear Miss J. Yours most faithfully,Wellington.
"In the Duke's next letter, dated May 30th, he writes—'I am not surprised at your vexation in neither receiving an acknowledgment of the receipt of your letters nor a visit from me. But I have always considered Patience an eminently Christian virtue—I assure you again that my time is so much occupied! I have dined but once since last Sunday! These are well known facts!—I returned home to rest at five o'clock yesterday morning on Horseback! I was employed all day yesterday after that Repose and did not return till two in the morning!'
"In the Duke's next letter, dated June 24th, he writes, after thanking me for my 'continued kindness;'—'I had before received several letters from you, for all of which and your continued kindness I return you my thanks. In respect to your question whether it is probable that I can go to see you before the 1st of July I answer that I will if it should be in my power but I cannot be certain or now fix the time. Till this night I have not dined since last Sunday and I doubt whether I shall again till next Sunday. I have scarcely time for Rest—None for Meals and as you may suppose none for visits. However I will go to see you if it should be in my power and will write to give you Notice.'
"I think if the Duke were to return to the world he would consider no duties before those connected with communion with me, who was so solicitous to strengthen him in every good word and work. But it was not to be! Therefore however much I may and did suffer, such I trust will be permitted to rank among the 'All things that are to work together for Good to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose,' and since there never was a moment when the Duke did not sink into the utmost insignificance in comparison with His good will and pleasure, such must necessarily follow.
"The poor Duke's next letter, dated July 13th I will copy throughout as it refers to his affliction—in the loss of his Grand Son." [Endnote 10]
This letter is interesting as giving a glimpse of that softer side of the Duke's nature, generally lost sight of in contemplation of his sterner characteristics.
London, July 13, 1846.
My dear Miss J.,—I have received your letters of the 12th and Friday last on the subject of the loss I recently sustained of my Grandson, the eldest Son of my second son. Poor boy! he died on Tuesday! By the Mercy of God! the second son, an infant has recovered. But at one time I was apprehensive that the grief of the Mother who was nursing the youngest child would have affected Her Health; and that we should have lost that Child; and eventually the Mother. But thank God! Both are now safe! I am very sensible of your kindness upon this occasion. I wish that it was in my power to tell you that I have any prospect of being able to go to see you! But I cannot expect to be able to do so at present! Believe me, My Dear Miss J. Ever Yours
Most faithfully,Wellington.
"The Duke's next letter, dated July 23rd, 1846, is expressive of concern at my having caught cold, adding; 'I am very sorry still to be unable to fix a time at which I can go to see you.'
"In the Duke's next letter, dated Aug. 13th, he writes—'I have to express my acknowledgments for several letters which I have received from you since you left London and I am very happy to learn that you like your situation there. I am still very much occupied by my duties in London but hope the Parliament will soon be prorogued and that I may be enabled to quit London and move to other parts of the Country where my presence is required;' and in the Duke's next, dated Aug. 17th, he writes; 'My duties will require my removal at a distance from London for at least two months or more.'
"In the Duke's next letter, dated Aug. 25th, he writes; 'I am under the necessity of going out of Town early tomorrow.'"
Sept. 1st, 1846.
I am concerned to find that my silence is considered unkind and that this unkindness is aggravated by my having travelled up from Portsmouth on Sunday! It is true! I did so. I was sorry for it. But my services to the Public rendered necessary my being in London early Monday morning which I could not have performed if I had not travelled on Sunday. However you shall not again have reason to complain of disappointment. I announce to you that I will write no more. If you could have attended to anything so trifling as what you might read in the Newspapers about Me! You might have seen that in the last week I was occupied at a distance from London during five days out of the seven and that in that space of time I have travelled and rode little short of 800 miles.
Indorsed by Miss J. "Who is he that saith and it cometh to pass when THE Lord commandeth it not?"
And now came the storm, springing from a misunderstanding pitifully out of proportion to the furore it excited! Miss J. and her friend Mrs. L. had engaged a cottage, and were about to move into it. Miss J. wrote to her guardian, desiring him to advance her funds for the furniture of her new abode. A day or so later, in writing to the Duke, Miss J. told him of the transaction, in her usual involved style, and asked his opinion of the matter. The rest of the note was, as usual, filled with incoherent reproaches for his lack of promptness in writing. The unfortunate Duke probably perused the letter hastily, and comprehended nothing but that Miss J. found fault with him about something, and that she wished a loan from somebody. His patience had been worn threadbare by much carping and criticism, and he answered her letter in that given below. The whole affair is so absurd, as sketched in Miss J.'s Diary, that the account is given in her own words, only omitting a few of the superfluous and irrelevant quotations from Scripture.
London, Sept. 23, 1846.
In order to prevent Irritation; and to avoid the receipt of repeated Letters expressing the same; I determined that I would inform Miss J. that I would write no more.
I had before repeatedly assured her, that I could not answer Her Letters regularly; but nothing would do, She continued to be angry and to complain with bitterness.
I have therefore been under the necessity of announcing that she is not to expect to hear from me! She has now mentioned to me that she had written to me to desire that I would assist Her with a Loan of Money. I have not received the Letter containing that Desire.
But I answer at once; that I will give her any reasonable assistance she can require from me; when she will let me know in clear distinct Terms what is the Sum she requires.
But I announce again; that I never will write upon any other Subject.
Wellington.
"Friday, September 26th, 1846. O my God, Wherefore hast Thou thought proper to let Satan try and distress me in this unanticipated manner?
"I did not ask Thee to bestow the Duke upon me! I did not think of ever writing to him until Thou madest me do so! and therefore I marvel at his being allowed to torture me first in one way and then in another for the last twelve years of my life, and above all by what he has now so insultingly done in pretending to think that I have written to him for a Loan, which Thou knowest, for Thy honor and glory I would not do under existing circumstances, for a thousand worlds! And I bless Thee for influencing me to Copy the letter addressed to my Guardian, word for word in my Diary, commencing my letter to the Duke as follows:
"'Having just written to my Guardian requesting him to oblige me with a Loan to purchase the furniture required for my Cottage I resume my pen, My dearest Duke to acquaint you thereof feeling still influenced to let you know how things are going forward respecting it. Which Loan he will be at liberty to deduct out of my Dividends being by no means large as I propose furnishing it so simply, being all that is necessary living in such retirement as we shall always do,' etc.
"At which, the more I look, the more unlikely it would appear that the Duke would understand it in any light that would for a moment lead him to suppose I could so far forget myself or the honour I have for His great name Which is above every name as to bow down thus, God having declared, 'It is abomination for the righteous to bow down before the wicked.' Consequently my indignation at his insulting letter led at once to my treating it as it deserves, telling him that nothing upon earth could have astonished me more than such insult, conveying an idea that I had purposed condescending receiving any Loan from his hands, which I would rather starve than do! and so I would! Yes, I would if I had no other means of subsistence die with starvation sooner than ask any favor of that kind from him! knowing as I do that Christ's Great Holy Name would be so dishonored thereby. Consequently, since it would be for His Holy Name sake, as well as knowing what was due to my high calling in Him, starvation would be comparatively sweet! rejoicing in being considered worthy, whilst so unworthy, so utterly unworthy of suffering for His Great Holy Name sake. I have called upon the Duke to apologize to me as the unwarrantable insult offered to me demands. Having given this over with himself into God's Hands to undertake the whole cause for me in whatever way is most for His own honor and glory, He will doubtlessly make him do as HE pleases,—and if not, HE will deliver me, I hope from him for ever. After such a letter as this, displaying more of his character than I have ever yet seen, I have too much contempt for him to desire any further communication with him, despising him accordingly.—
"Having given a little vent to my feelings by writing the above, I will now attempt to describe the circumstances concerning this insulting letter.
"The first thing on awaking I was influenced to get up however unwell, in case a letter by the earliest Post should arrive from the Duke, little imagining what was in store for me, when God thought proper to attract my attention to so remarkable a Scripture, namely. 'The preparation of the heart in man and the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.' HE permitted me sensibly to feel His 'strength made perfect in weakness,' otherwise I should have sunk under the blow! But as his letter was put into my hands, such an upholding power was exercised over me that however astonished at its contents and indignant thereat, The Lord was with me....
"I lost no time in answering the Duke as he deserved, my heart glowing with all the holy indignation such an insulting offer so coarsely conveyed was calculated to call forth. I then hurried off to Mrs. L. with that and the one just before received, which she viewed in like manner, considering it disgraceful treatment in his daring to write to me thus. She only waits his reply to mine (which I read to her and on my return home enclosed and forwarded, hastening off myself to a Post Office for that purpose) and the Lord's influence in order to take up her powerful pen and address him as his offered insult deserves.
"On my return from the Post Office I opened my loved Bible at the words; 'The wicked fleeth when no man pursueth, but the righteous are bold as a lion,' encouraging me to think increasingly that my bold indignant fearless reply to the Duke was justified."
Then follow other "Scriptures," all applied to her credit and the Duke's disadvantage, and a prayer in which she beseeches the Almighty to "take this man into Thy Hands and compel him to do me the justice I deserve."
A tempest in a teapot! That the Commander-in-chief of the British armies, the greatest soldier of his age, should have been subjected to the attacks of a peevish woman's tongue, is ridiculous; but there is a pitiable side to the affair as well. One cannot help feeling compassion for the poor old man,—seventy-seven years of age now,—even while one laughs at the absurdity of the situation. Miss J., as usual, could not let matters rest, but prepared for another attack. Her Diary describes her sensations of suspense as she awaited a reply from the Duke, and "the Scriptures" with which she fortified her position. On Sunday she writes:—
"I have written another indignant letter to the Duke, in which I purpose enclosing his hair and picture, which last being made of sealing wax is of course of no value. These being the only things ever received or required by me, I am solicitous to relieve myself from the burthen they necessarily become under present circumstances. Consequently, after considering or reflecting that it may perhaps be more for the honor and glory of God to return them in silence, I have enclosed them in two blank covers, waiting now only to ascertain their weight in order that they may be stamped accordingly and reach him in safety."
It may be stated that even after receiving the Duke's letter of apology Miss J. remained firm in her intention to return these gifts of the Duke's. Mrs. L., however, who was constantly taking the part of a deus ex machina in Miss J.'s affairs, succeeded in persuading her to keep both the hair and the picture.
The fiercely demanded apology arrived on Monday. Miss J. writes:—
"I have to thank my good and gracious God for his indulgent kindness in sending me not only a letter from my Guardian with Enclosures, but also one from the Duke, apologizing fully."
Sept. 27, 1846.
I am very much concerned to find by a letter which I received this Morning from Miss J., that I was so unfortunate as to have read incorrectly or to have misunderstood Her letter!
It appears that it was from Her Guardian and not from me that she intended to borrow money! I confess that it frequently happens to me to be unable to make out Miss J.'s handwriting! and I sometimes do not exactly comprehend what it appears to me that she intended to write! This is to be attributed to the Celerity with which she writes!
I beg leave to apologize for my mistake and above all for thinking it possible that she might want to borrow money from me! I beg her forgiveness for this Error!
Miss J.'s Most faithful
Humble ServantWellington.
P.S. I will never offend again in any manner.
Miss J. delayed acknowledging the Duke's reply for several days, but finally sent off the following epistle, which she no doubt regarded as a model of Christian forgiveness.
Oct. 3rd, 1846.
My Lord Duke,—I am grieved to say that it has taken a much longer period to subdue my indignation than as a Christian I could wish: consequently as I am incapable of dissimulation I have been reluctant to resume my pen since the day on which I received your merited apology, when I hastily answered it. But that reply was not permitted to be forwarded, therefore I sealed it up with the articles intended to accompany it until I could further learn what God would have me do, nor is it until this moment that He has given me even a capability of addressing you again!
Yet as life is uncertain with all! it would, I doubt not, eventually have grieved me if anything had happened in the interim to rob me of the power of granting your request respecting my forgiveness. This I now do and sincerely hope God will forgive also! and far more perfectly and freely than I alas! as a Creature am enabled to do! HE condescendingly assures them Who offend Him yet seek forgiveness … that their sins and iniquities are remembered "no more."…
That you, My Lord Duke, may experimentally feel this, not only as regards this offence to one hitherto so devotedly bestowed upon you by Himself,—but any and every other transgression that can ever become an impediment to your eternal happiness is the earnest wish of
His devoted Child and ServantA. J.
Should it be the will of God to allow this to call forth a reply, it becomes my duty to add that I am still in the same lodging, my Cottage not yet being ready for our reception, nor will it be until Thursday the 8th Inst. if so soon,—having required more time than anticipated for our entrance which I hope will be blessed.
P.S. The idea, My Lord Duke, that there may come a moment when any spiritual consolation on my part may be sought for by you, induces me to place it in your power in that case to obtain such by adding that the address with which you are so familiar will always find me or my Guardian as follows.... Having said this, I hope that I have now done all that God requires from me, leaving it with Him accordingly.
Apparently the Duke did not feel the need of any spiritual consolation from Miss J., for she did not hear from him again for two months. Even then he only wrote because of her request that he would return a letter she had sent him, announcing the death of her guardian.
Dec. 15th, 1846.
Field Marshal the Duke of Wellington presents his Compliments to Miss J. He assures her that whenever she has expressed a Desire to have back a paper enclosed to Him, he has invariably complied with her desire immediately on his having perused it. Letters addressed by the Duke to Miss J. have been returned to him: and he has invariably thrown them into the fire, and possibly the enclosed Letter!
