Kitabı oku: «Struggles amd Triumphs: or, Forty Years' Recollections of P.T. Barnum», sayfa 34

After they had been about a week at the Museum, one of the chiefs discovered that visitors paid money for entering. This information he soon communicated to the other chiefs, and I heard an immediate murmur of discontent. Their eyes were opened, and no power could induce them to appear again upon the stage. Their dignity had been offended, and their wild, flashing eyes were anything but agreeable. Indeed, I hardly felt safe in their presence, and it was with a feeling of relief that I witnessed their departure for Washington the next morning.

In the spring of 1864, the United States Consul at Larnica, Island of Cyprus, Turkish Dominions, wrote me a letter, declaring that he and the English Consul, an American physician, resident in the island, and a large company of Europeans as well as natives, had seen the most remarkable object, no doubt, in the world, – a lusus naturæ, a feminine phenomenon. This woman was represented to have “four cornicles on her head, and one large horn, equal in size to an ordinary ram’s horn, growing out of the side of her head”; and the consistency of the horns was represented to be similar to that of cows’ or goats’ horns. This singular story continued: “These horns have been growing for ten or twelve years, and were carefully concealed by the woman until a few weeks since, when a vision appeared in the person of an old man, and warned her to remove the veil she wore, or God would punish her. She sent to the Greek priest (she being of that persuasion), and confessed to him, and was ordered to uncover her head, which she at once did.” She was subsequently seen by the entire population, and the French consul, in company with others, offered her fifty thousand piastres to go to Paris for exhibition. The English consul, I was further informed, had pronounced this woman to be “worth her weight in gold”; and I was assured that if I wished to add her to my “wonderful Museum, and present to the American public the most remarkable object yet exhibited,” I had only to “send an agent immediately to secure the prize.”

Informing myself of the trustworthiness of my correspondent (who also wrote a similar account to the New York Observer), I was not long in making up my mind to secure this freak of nature; and I despatched Mr. John Greenwood, Jr., in the steamer “City of Baltimore,” for Liverpool, April 30, 1864. He went to London and Paris, and thence to Marseilles, where he took a Syrian and Egyptian steamer to Palermo, and from thence proceeded to Cyprus. On arriving, if he could have seen the woman at once, he could have re-embarked on the steamer, which sailed again in a few hours for other islands; but unfortunately, the woman was a few miles in the interior, and poor Greenwood was detained a month on the island before he could take another steamer to get away. Worse yet, the woman, spite of the impression she had made upon so many and such respectable witnesses, was really no curiosity after all, as it proved upon examination, that her “horns” were not horns at all, but fleshy excrescences, which may have been singularly shaped tumors, or wens. It is needless to add that my agent did not engage her; and after a month of discomfort and hard living, he succeeded in getting away, and sailed for Constantinople, mainly to see what could be done in the way of securing one or more Circassian women for exhibition in my Museum.

On his way through the Mediterranean, he had the following adventure: On board the steamer, the harem of a Turkish Pasha occupied one side of the quarter deck, which was divided off from the rest by a hurdle fence run longitudinally through the middle of the deck. Greenwood was one day sitting in an easy chair with his back to these women and their attendants, when, feeling his chair move, he turned and saw one of the Pasha’s wives getting over the hurdle, and as there was scarcely room for her to squeeze herself between the chairs in which passengers were sitting, he moved his own chair out of the way and rising, offered his hand to assist the woman over the fence. She indignantly jumped back, and Greenwood was immediately seized by two of the Pasha’s attendants, violently shaken, and taken to task in Turkish for daring to offer to touch the hand of one of his Excellency’s women. Greenwood had that day formed the acquaintance of a fellow-passenger, a young Greek from Scio, who was going to Beyrout to act as clerk for a merchant in that place. He spoke good English, and seeing Greenwood in trouble among the Turks, and knowing that he could speak neither Greek nor Arabic, he went to the rescue, and demanded an explanation of the difficulty.

Upon hearing what was the trouble, he informed the turbulent fellows that Greenwood had no motive in his act beyond simple common courtesy. The prisoner, however, was still detained in the grasp of the Turks, till the will of the insulted Pasha could be known. On deck soon came the irate Pasha, in company with an old gentleman who was said to have been tutor, formerly, to the present Sultan of Turkey. When the two heard the charge and the explanation, and had consulted together a little while, Greenwood was released. But for the friendly interposition of the Greek, he might have been bastinadoed, or even bowstrung.

During the remainder of the voyage he was closely watched, but he was very careful to be guilty of no act of “politeness,” and he went on shore at Constantinople without so much as saying good-by to the Pasha. In Constantinople he had some very singular adventures. To carry out his purpose of getting access to the very interior of the slave-marts, he dressed himself in full Turkish costume, learned a few words and phrases which would be necessary in his assumed character as a slave-buyer, and, as the Turks are a notably reticent people, he succeeded very well in passing himself off for what he appeared, though he ran a risk of detection many times every day. In this manner, he saw a large number of Circassian girls and women, some of them the most beautiful beings he had ever seen, and after a month in Constantinople and in other Turkish cities, he sailed for Marseilles, then went to Paris, picking up many treasures for my Museum, and returned to New York, after a journey of 13,112 miles.

CHAPTER XXXVII
MR. AND MRS. GENERAL TOM THUMB

MISS LAVINIA WARREN – A CHARMING LITTLE LADY – SUPPOSED TO BE THE $30,000 NUTT IN DISGUISE – HER WARDROBE AND PRESENTS – STORY OF A RING – THE LITTLE COMMODORE IN LOVE – TOM THUMB SMITTEN – RIVALRY OF THE DWARFS – JEALOUSY OF THE GENERAL – VISIT AT BRIDGEPORT – THE GENERAL’S STYLISH TURN-OUT – MISS WARREN IMPRESSED – CALL OF THE GENERAL – A LILIPUTIAN LOVE SCENE – TOM THUMB’S INVENTORY OF HIS PROPERTY – HE PROPOSES AND IS ACCEPTED – ARRIVAL OF THE COMMODORE – HIS GRIEF – EXCITEMENT OVER THE ENGAGEMENT – THE WEDDING IN GRACE CHURCH – REVEREND JUNIUS WILLEY – A SPICY LETTER BY DOCTOR TAYLOR – GRAND RECEPTION OF MR. AND MRS. STRATTON – THE COMMODORE IN SEARCH OF A GREEN COUNTRY GIRL.

IN 1862 I heard of an extraordinary dwarf girl, named Lavinia Warren, who was residing with her parents at Middleboro’, Massachusetts, and I sent an invitation to her and her parents to come and visit me at Bridgeport. They came, and I found her to be a most intelligent and refined young lady, well educated, and an accomplished, beautiful and perfectly-developed woman in miniature. I succeeded in making an engagement with her for several years, during which she contracted – as dwarfs are said to have the power to do – to visit Great Britain, France, and other foreign lands.

Having arranged the terms of her engagement, I took her to the house of one of my daughters in New York, where she remained quietly, while I was procuring her wardrobe and jewelry, and making arrangements for her début. As yet, nothing had been said in the papers about this interesting young lady, and one day as I was taking her home with me to Bridgeport, I met in the cars the wife of a wealthy menagerie proprietor, who introduced me to her two daughters, young ladies of sixteen and eighteen years of age, and then said:

“You have disguised the little Commodore very nicely.”

“That is not Commodore Nutt,” I replied, “it is a young lady whom I have recently discovered.”

“Very well done, Mr. Barnum,” replied Mrs. B., with a look of self satisfaction.

“Really,” I repeated, “this is a young lady.”

“Thank you, Mr. Barnum, but I know Commodore Nutt in whatever costume you put him; and I recognized him the moment you brought him into the car.”

“But, Mrs. B.,” I replied, “Commodore Nutt is now exhibiting in the Museum, and this is a little lady whom I hope to bring before the public soon.”

“Mr. Barnum,” she replied, “you forget that I am a showman’s wife, conversant with all the showman’s tricks, and that I cannot be deceived.”

Seeing there was no prospect of convincing her, I replied in a confidential whisper, for such chance for a joke was not to be lost:

“Well, I see you are too sharp for me, but I beg you not to mention it, for you are the only person on board this train who suspects it is the Commodore.”

“I will say nothing,” she replied, “but do please bring the little fellow over here, for my daughters have never seen him.”

I stepped and told Lavinia the joke and asked her to help carry it out. I then took her over where she got a seat in the midst of the three ladies.

“Ah, Commodore,” whispered Mrs. B., “you have done it pretty well, but bless you, I knew those eyes and that nose the moment I saw you.”

“Your eyes must be pretty sharp, then,” replied Lavinia.

“Oh, you see people in our line understand these things, and are never deceived by appearances; but let me introduce you to these two young ladies, my daughters.”

“We are happy to see you, sir,” said one of the young ladies. They then enjoyed a very animated conversation, in the course of which they asked the “Commodore” all about his family, and Lavinia managed to answer the questions in such a way as to avoid suspicion. The ladies then informed the “Commodore” that there was a sweet little lady living in their town only sixteen years old, and if he would visit them, they would introduce him; that her family was highly respectable, and she would make him a capital wife! Lavinia thanked them and promised to visit them if it should be convenient. As the ladies left the car, they shook hands with Lavinia, kissed her, and in a whisper said “good morning, sir.” Meeting the husband of the lady, some weeks afterwards, I told him the joke, and he enjoyed it so highly that he will probably never let his wife and daughters hear the last of it.

I purchased a very splendid wardrobe for Miss Warren, including scores of the richest dresses that could be procured, costly jewels, and in fact everything that could add to the charms of her naturally charming little person. She was then placed on exhibition at the Museum and from the day of her débût she was an extraordinary success. Commodore Nutt was on exhibition with her, and although he was several years her junior he evidently took a great fancy to her. One day I presented to Lavinia a diamond and emerald ring, and as it did not exactly fit her finger, I told her I would give her another one and that she might present this one to the Commodore in her own name. She did so, and an unlooked-for effect was speedily apparent; the little Commodore felt sure that this was a love-token, and poor Lavinia was in the greatest trouble, for she considered herself quite a woman, and regarded the Commodore only as a nice little boy. But she did not like to offend him, and while she did not encourage, she did not openly repel his attentions. Miss Lavinia Warren, however, was never destined to be Mrs. Commodore Nutt.

It was by no means an unnatural circumstance that I should be suspected of having instigated and brought about the marriage of Tom Thumb with Lavinia Warren. Had I done this, I should at this day have felt no regrets, for it has proved, in an eminent degree, one of the “happy marriages.” I only say, what is known to all of their immediate friends, that from first to last their engagement was an affair of the heart – a case of “love at first sight” – that the attachment was mutual, and that it only grows with the lapse of time. But I had neither part nor lot in instigating or in occasioning the marriage. And as I am anxious to be put right before the public, and so to correct whatever of false impression may have gained ground, I have procured the consent of all the parties to a sketch of the wooing, winning and nuptials. Of course I should not lay these details before the public, except with the sanction of those most interested. In this they consent to pay the penalty of distinction. And if the wooings of kings and queens must be told, why not the courtship and marriage of General and Mrs. Tom Thumb? The story is an interesting one, and shall be told alike to exonerate me from the suspicion named, and to amuse those – and they count by scores of thousands – who are interested in the welfare of the distinguished couple.

In the autumn of 1862, when Lavinia Warren was on exhibition at the Museum, Tom Thumb had no business engagement with me; in fact, he was not on exhibition at the time at all; he was taking a “vacation” at his house in Bridgeport. Whenever he came to New York he naturally called upon me, his old friend, at the Museum. He happened to be in the city at the time referred to, and one day he called, quite unexpectedly to me, while Lavinia was holding one of her levees. Here he now saw her for the first time, and very naturally made her acquaintance. He had a short interview with her, after which he came directly to my private office and desired to see me alone. Of course I complied with his request, but without the remotest suspicion as to his object. I closed the door, and the General took a seat. His first question let in the light. He inquired about the family of Lavinia Warren. I gave him the facts, which I clearly perceived gave him satisfaction of a peculiar sort. He then said, with great frankness, and with no less earnestness:

“Mr. Barnum, that is the most charming little lady I ever saw, and I believe she was created on purpose to be my wife! Now,” he continued, “you have always been a friend of mine, and I want you to say a good word for me to her. I have got plenty of money, and I want to marry and settle down in life, and I really feel as if I must marry that young lady.”

The little General was highly excited, and his general manner betrayed the usual anxiety, which, I doubt not, most of my readers will understand without a description. I could not repress a smile, nor forget my joke; and I said:

“Lavinia is engaged already.”

“To whom – Commodore Nutt?” asked Tom Thumb, with much earnestness, and some exhibition of the “green-eyed monster.”

“No, General, to me,” I replied.

“Never mind,” said the General, laughing, “you can exhibit her for a while, and then give up the engagement; but I do hope you will favor my suit with her.”

I told the General that this was too sudden an affair; that he must take time to think of it; but he insisted that years of thought would make no difference, for his mind was fully made up.

“Well, General,” I replied, “I will not oppose you in your suit, but you must do your own courting. I tell you, however, the Commodore will be jealous of you, and more than that, Miss Warren is nobody’s fool, and you will have to proceed very cautiously if you can succeed in winning her affections.”

The General thanked me, and promised to be very discreet. A change now came suddenly over him in several particulars. He had been (much to his credit) very fond of his country home in Bridgeport, where he spent his intervals of rest with his horses, and especially with his yacht, for his fondness for the water was his great passion. But now he was constantly having occasion to visit the city, and horses and yachts were strangely neglected. He had a married sister in New York, and his visits to her multiplied, for, of course, he came to New York “to see his sister!” His mother, who resided in Bridgeport, remarked that Charles had never before shown so much brotherly affection, nor so much fondness for city life.

His visits to the Museum were very frequent, and it was noticeable that new relations were being established between him and Commodore Nutt. The Commodore was not exactly jealous, yet he strutted around like a bantam rooster whenever the General approached Lavinia. One day he and the General got into a friendly scuffle in the dressing-room, and the Commodore threw the General upon his back in “double quick” time. The Commodore is lithe, wiry, and quick in his movements, but the General is naturally slow, and although he was considerably heavier than the Commodore, he soon found that he could not stand before him in a personal encounter. Moreover, the Commodore is naturally quick-tempered, and when excited, he brags about his knowledge of “the manly art of self-defence,” and sometimes talks about pistols and bowie knives, etc. Tom Thumb, on the contrary, is by natural disposition decidedly a man of peace; hence, in this, agreeing with Falstaff as to what constituted the “better part of valor,” he was strongly inclined to keep his distance, if the little Commodore showed any belligerent symptoms.

In the course of several weeks the General found numerous opportunities to talk with Lavinia, while the Commodore was performing on the stage, or was otherwise engaged; and, to a watchful discerner, it was evident he was making encouraging progress in the affair of the heart. He also managed to meet Lavinia on Sunday afternoons and evenings, without the knowledge of the Commodore; but he assured me he had not yet dared to suggest matrimony.

He finally returned to Bridgeport, and privately begged that on the following Saturday I would take Lavinia up to my house, and also invite him.

His immediate object in this was, that his mother might get acquainted with Lavinia, for he feared opposition from that source whenever the idea of his marriage should be suggested. I could do no less than accede to his proposal, and on the following Friday, while Lavinia and the Commodore were sitting in the green-room, I said:

“Lavinia, you may go up to Bridgeport with me to-morrow morning, and remain until Monday.”

“Thank you,” she replied; “it will be quite a relief to get into the country for a couple of days.”

The Commodore immediately pricked up his ears, and said:

“Mr. Barnum, I should like to go to Bridgeport to-morrow.”

“What for?” I asked.

“I want to see my little ponies; I have not seen them for several months,” he replied.

I whispered in his ear, “you little rogue, that is the pony you want to see,” pointing to Lavinia.

He insisted I was mistaken. When I remarked that he could not well be spared from the Museum, he said:

“Oh! I can perform at half past seven o’clock, and then jump on to the eight o’clock evening train, and go up by myself, reaching Bridgeport before eleven, and return early Monday morning.”

I feared there would be a clashing of interests between the rival pigmies; but wishing to please him, I consented to his request, especially as Lavinia also favored it. I wished I could then fathom that little woman’s heart, and see whether she (who must have discovered the secret of the General’s frequent visits to the Museum) desired the Commodore’s visit in order to stir up the General’s ardor, or whether, as seemed to me the more likely, she was seeking in this way to prevent a denouement which she was not inclined to favor. Certain it is, that though I was the General’s confidant, and knew all his desires upon the subject, no person had discovered the slightest evidence that Lavinia Warren had ever entertained the remotest suspicion of his thoughts regarding marriage. If she had made the discovery, as I assume, she kept the secret well. In fact, I assured Tom Thumb that every indication, so far as any of us could observe, was to the effect that his suit would be rejected. The little General was fidgety, but determined; hence he was anxious to have Lavinia meet his mother, and also see his possessions in Bridgeport, for he owned considerable land and numerous houses there.

The General met us at the depot in Bridgeport, on Saturday morning, and drove us to my house in his own carriage – his coachman being tidily dressed, with a broad velvet ribbon and silver buckle placed upon his hat expressly for the occasion. Lavinia was duly informed that this was the General’s “turn out”; and after resting half an hour at Lindencroft, he took her out to ride. He stopped a few moments at his mother’s house, where she saw the apartments which his father had built expressly for him, and filled with the most gorgeous furniture – all corresponding to his own diminutive size. Then he took her to East Bridgeport, and undoubtedly took occasion to point out in great detail all of the houses which he owned, for he depended much upon having his wealth make some impression upon her. They returned, and the General stayed to lunch. I asked Lavinia how she liked her ride; she replied:

“It was very pleasant, but,” she added, “it seems as if you and Tom Thumb owned about all of Bridgeport!”

The General took his leave and returned at five o’clock to dinner, with his mother. Mrs. Stratton remained until seven o’clock. She expressed herself charmed with Lavinia Warren; but not a suspicion passed her mind that little Charlie was endeavoring to give her this accomplished young lady as a daughter-in-law. The General had privately asked me to invite him to stay over night, for, said he, “If I get a chance, I intend to ‘pop the question’ before the Commodore arrives.” So I told his mother I thought the General had better stop with us over night, as the Commodore would be up in the late train, adding that it would be more pleasant for the little folks to be together. She assented, and the General was happy.

After tea Lavinia and the General sat down to play backgammon. As nine o’clock approached, I remarked that it was about time to retire, but somebody would have to sit up until nearly eleven o’clock, in order to let in the Commodore. The General replied:

“I will sit up with pleasure, if Miss Warren will remain also.”

Lavinia carelessly replied, that she was accustomed to late hours, and she would wait and see the Commodore. A little supper was placed upon the table for the Commodore, and the family retired.

Now it happened that a couple of mischievous young ladies were visiting at my house, one of whom was to sleep with Lavinia. They were suspicious that the General was going to propose to Lavinia that evening, and, in a spirit of ungovernable curiosity, they determined, notwithstanding its manifest impropriety, to witness the operation, if they could possibly manage to do so on the sly. Of course this was inexcusable, the more so as so few of my readers, had they been placed under the same temptation, would have been guilty of such an impropriety! Perhaps I should hesitate to use the testimony of such witnesses, or even to trust it. But a few weeks after, they told the little couple the whole story, were forgiven, and all had a hearty laugh over it.

It so happened that the door of the sitting room, in which the General and Lavinia were left at the backgammon board, opened into the hall just at the side of the stairs, and these young misses, turning out the lights in the hall, seated themselves upon the stairs in the dark, where they had a full view of the cosy little couple, and were within easy ear-shot of all that was said.

The house was still. The General soon acknowledged himself vanquished at backgammon, and gave it up. After sitting a few moments, he evidently thought it was best to put a clincher on the financial part of his abilities; so he drew from his pocket a policy of insurance, and handing it to Lavinia, he asked her if she knew what it was.

Examining it, she replied, “It is an insurance policy. I see you keep your property insured.”

“But the beauty of it is, it is not my property,” replied the General, “and yet I get the benefit of the insurance in case of fire. You will see,” he continued, unfolding the policy, “this is the property of Mr. Williams, but here, you will observe, it reads ‘loss, if any, payable to Charles S. Stratton, as his interest may appear.’ The fact is, I loaned Mr. Williams three thousand dollars, took a mortgage on his house, and made him insure it for my benefit. In this way, you perceive, I get my interest, and he has to pay the taxes.”

“That is a very wise way, I should think,” remarked Lavinia.

“That is the way I do all my business,” replied the General, complacently, as he returned the huge insurance policy to his pocket. “You see,” he continued, “I never lend any of my money without taking bond and mortgage security, then I have no trouble with taxes; my principal is secure, and I receive my interest regularly.”

The explanation seemed satisfactory to Lavinia, and the General’s courage began to rise. Drawing his chair a little nearer to hers, he said:

“So you are going to Europe, soon?”

“Yes,” replied Lavinia, “Mr. Barnum intends to take me over in a couple of months.”

“You will find it very pleasant,” remarked the General; “I have been there twice, in fact I have spent six years abroad, and I like the old countries very much.”

“I hope I shall like the trip, and I expect I shall,” responded Lavinia; “for Mr. Barnum says I shall visit all the principal cities, and he has no doubt I will be invited to appear before the Queen of England, the Emperor and Empress of France, the King of Prussia, the Emperor of Austria, and at the courts of any other countries which we may visit. Oh! I shall like that, it will be so new to me.”

“Yes, it will be very interesting indeed. I have visited most of the crowned heads,” remarked the General, with an evident feeling of self-congratulation. “But are you not afraid you will be lonesome in a strange country?” asked the General.

“No, I think there is no danger of that, for friends will accompany me,” was the reply.

“I wish I was going over, for I know all about the different countries, and could explain them all to you,” remarked Tom Thumb.

“That would be very nice,” said Lavinia.

“Do you think so?” said the General, moving his chair still closer to Lavinia’s.

“Of course,” replied Lavinia, coolly, “for I, being a stranger to all the habits and customs of the people, as well as to the country, it would be pleasant to have some person along who could answer all my foolish questions.”

“I should like it first rate, if Mr. Barnum would engage me,” said the General.

“I thought you remarked the other day that you had money enough, and was tired of travelling,” said Lavinia, with a slightly mischievous look from one corner of her eye.

“That depends upon my company while travelling,” replied the General.

“You might not find my company very agreeable.”

“I would be glad to risk it.”

“Well, perhaps Mr. Barnum would engage you, if you asked him,” said Lavinia.

“Would you really like to have me go?” asked the General, quietly insinuating his arm around her waist, but hardly close enough to touch her.

“Of course I would,” was the reply.

The little General’s arm clasped the waist closer as he turned his face nearer to hers, and said:

“Don’t you think it would be pleasanter if we went as man and wife?”

The little fairy quickly disengaged his arm, and remarked that the General was a funny fellow to joke in that way.

“I am not joking at all,” said the General, earnestly, “it is quite too serious a matter for that.”

“I wonder why the Commodore don’t come?” said Lavinia.

“I hope you are not anxious for his arrival, for I am sure I am not,” responded the General, “and what is more, I do hope you will say ‘yes,’ before he comes at all!”

“Really, Mr. Stratton,” said Lavinia, with dignity, “if you are in earnest in your strange proposal, I must say I am surprised.”

“Well, I hope you are not offended,” replied the General, “for I was never more in earnest in my life, and I hope you will consent. The first moment I saw you I felt that you were created to be my wife.”

“But this is so sudden.”

“Not so very sudden; it is several months since we first met, and you know all about me, and my family, and I hope you find nothing to object to in me.”

“Not at all; on the contrary, I have found you very agreeable, in fact I like you very much as a friend, but I have not thought of marrying, and – ”

“And what? my dear,” said the General, giving her a kiss. “Now, I beg of you, don’t have any ‘buts’ or ‘ands’ about it. You say you like me as a friend, why will you not like me as a husband? You ought to get married; I love you dearly, and I want you for a wife. Now, deary, the Commodore will be here in a few minutes, I may not have a chance to see you again alone; do say that we will be married, and I will get Mr. Barnum to give up your engagement.”

Lavinia hesitated, and finally said:

“I think I love you well enough to consent, but I have always said I would never marry without my mother’s consent.”

“Oh! I’ll ask your mother. May I ask your mother? Come, say yes to that, and I will go and see her next week. May I do that, pet?”

Then there was a sound of something very much like the popping of several corks from as many beer bottles. The young eaves-droppers had no doubt as to the character of these reports, nor did they doubt that they sealed the betrothal, for immediately after they heard Lavinia say:

“Yes, Charles, you may ask my mother.” Another volley of reports followed, and then Lavinia said, “Now, Charles, don’t whisper this to a living soul; let us keep our own secrets for the present.”

“All right,” said the General, “I will say nothing; but next Tuesday I shall start to see your mother.”

“Perhaps you may find it difficult to obtain her consent,” said Lavinia.