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CHAPTER VIII

We left Secundrabad on the 11th February, 1811, and proceeded, by forced marches, to Masulipatam, where I had not long been when I was again thrown into a very disordered state, in consequence of the hot winds, being so ill with my breathing that my wife was under the necessity of fanning me during two whole days. After I recovered, there being some of my fifers in the hospital, I went in one day to see how they were getting on; and, to my great astonishment, as I entered the hospital, whom did I see there but my dear friend Alexander Chevis, lying like a skeleton in one of the cots. I looked at him for some time before I could believe my own eyes; and scarcely being yet sure, I said to him, "Sandy, is this you?" He answered in the affirmative. After having inquired into all particulars, and conversed a little with him, I immediately went home and described to my wife the situation of this good man; and we set about concerting measures that might in some degree mitigate his distresses, – for he was at this time far gone in the complaint under which I laboured, when he was "God's hand" in comforting and instructing me; and truly I saw here a divine call, as well as the call of a grateful heart, considering what he had done for me in Prince of Wales's Island.

Whenever my duty would permit, I was consequently in the hospital, reading and conversing with him; and on the two Sabbaths that he lived after this, I remained with him nearly the whole day; but my attendance on him was richly rewarded, for I learned more from this dying saint of what is really worth learning, than I had done all my life before.

A few nights before he died, he expressed a desire that I should bring my wife, and Serjeant Gray with his wife, who had formerly been friendly to him, that he might have the satisfaction of seeing us altogether before he departed, the which I did; and he had saved some of his daily allowance of wine, that we might all drink before him, and appear comfortable. When we were all seated, and had ate and drank together, he expressed himself in nearly the following words: – "My dear friends, although I may never again see you in this world, I wish that the keeper of Israel may keep you from falling before the many temptations to which you are exposed, and bless you, and preserve to his heavenly kingdom; and, although in all probability we shall never behold each other in the face, while here, I pray that the Lord may seal you among his treasures, and make you his, in the day when he maketh up his jewels."

When I went next morning to inquire how he had rested, he told me he had been very much pained, and appeared to be going very fast. I spent as much of the day with him as my duty would permit, and when I went at night with his drop of punch, which we used to make for him, and which he preferred to the hospital wine, I found him somewhat easier; but he said to me, he felt he had but a very short time to live; so I took an affectionate farewell of him, but in the morning he was still living. He told me he had been much worse during the night, and had suffered great pain, and added, "that he had a desire to depart from a sinful heart, a wicked world, and a loathsome disease, and to be with Christ, where holiness dwells, where sin shall never enter, and where the inhabitants shall no more say, I am sick." So the Lord granted his petition, for he died that evening. "Lord enable me to live the life, that I may die the death, of the righteous, and that my last end may be like his!"

We remained in Masulipatam about four months, and I was very glad to hear when the route came for us to leave it; for it was not only intolerably hot, but when it blew, we were like to be suffocated with clouds of sand; and it was the worst place for provisions we had yet seen. The butcher meat was so very bad that we had it only once within our door all that time. But I would have been happy indeed had this march been to embark for Europe; for the regiment was getting daily more and more profligate and abominable! Here the papists laid a plot for destroying the protestants, but it was detected, and the ringleaders punished; and here, too, the men were shooting themselves, or one another, whenever the freak took them.

We had a young fellow of the name of Courtney, who shot two men with one ball in the open barrack room! one of them was a man belonging to the regiment, and the other a black man, who was in the barrack selling cloth for a livelihood. The white man had been impeaching Courtney with stealing something from him, which the other flatly denied, though falsely, (at least he was a noted thief,) and threatened to make him repent it; and in the course of a little time afterward, he took down his firelock, and pretended to be spunging her out, no one ever in the least suspecting him to be putting in a ball-cartridge out of his pouch; so he levelled her for the person whom he had just been threatening, and sent the contents through his body, and they lodged also in that of the black man. Both of them died in a very short time. He was immediately taken into confinement, and in a short time was sent to Madras, where he was tried, convicted, and executed. But, to show the hardened character of this faithful servant of Satan, I may mention, that one of the soldiers asked him, before he left the regiment, "if he was not sorry for what he had done?" to which he replied, "that what he was most sorry for was, that he could not get an hour's fowling in the barracks before he went away!" What think you of this in a youth of nineteen years of age! I doubt not but it will strike the mind of the reader at once, what a contrast there was between him and my dear deceased friend just now mentioned; but the "tares and the wheat must grow together until the harvest," when an eternal separation shall take place; for those of similar dispositions shall then come together, never, never more to be separated! Oh! comforting to think that there shall not be one sinner in the vast congregation of the righteous. For the righteous who have here the image of God partially restored, shall then "shine as the sun" in the kingdom of their father.

As I have been speaking of shooting, I must mention one other circumstance before I leave this bloody subject, which is of the wonderful kind; for in the former case, we see or hear of one man killing two of his fellow-creatures with one ball; now I am going to tell you of another that had two balls through him and yet lived! —

Our men were in general very profligate with the native women, and one of them having a quarrel with his black concubine, was resolved to give her the effectual cure for a bad wife; and, to accomplish his purpose, he put two ball-cartridges into his firelock, and laid her quietly out of the way, until an opportunity would present itself to shoot her; and when she made her appearance, while he was in the act of raising the gun, one of his comrades, who knew of his diabolical design, made an attempt to wrest the firelock from him, but, in the scuffle, some of their feet touching the trigger, the firelock exploded, and both of the balls went through his body. This is the most wonderful accident of this kind I have ever known, for this man was at his duty in about six weeks afterwards! And the wonder lies chiefly in considering that the balls entered his belly and came out at his back.

There was a black nabob also made away with himself here. He was sent down the country to the charge of our regiment for not paying his tribute; but, laying this treatment very much to heart, he fell into a state of melancholy, and put an end to his existence by means of a knife, having given the guard that was over him a wedge of gold the day before.

In giving this sad picture of the wickedness of the regiment, some of my readers may think I have been guilty of exaggeration. They may say, we have heard of soldiers being given to drinking and swearing, and all manner of debauchery; but surely when you tell us that they were given to such things as shooting themselves, or one another, it must certainly be one of those extraordinary stories that travellers are so often accused of telling, in order to excite one's astonishment. But I can assure you I have related nothing but facts, and many more I could give you as horrible as those above mentioned. Though I have little inclination for the task, I will enter a little more into the subject, pointing out some of the circumstances which brought about this deplorable state of things, and illustrate the progress of sin by one or two individual examples which came under my own notice. Should any of my readers be touched to the quick by any thing I shall write; that is, should they trace in the characters I may bring forward any resemblance to their own, let them not turn away from comparing likenesses. If you are still under the power of sin, you are the enemy of God, and carry about with you the same principle of depravity which operated in these men, and produced such woful effects. Therefore, "be not high-minded, but fear." "For as in water face answers to face, so does the heart of man to man." On the other hand, if you have a scriptural ground of hope that you are turned from darkness to light, and from the dominion of sin and Satan unto God; you may be led by a consideration of these things to give him all the glory, for unto him it belongs. "For who maketh thee to differ from another, and what hast thou which thou didst not receive? therefore, glory not as thou hadst not received it." But rather let you and I join with the Psalmist, in a tribute of praise unto him who has delivered us from becoming the prey of the terrible, saying, "Not unto us, O Lord, not unto us, but unto thy name give the glory, for thy mercy, and for thy truth's sake."

I have already said, that upon the march we endured great fatigues, and also many inconveniences; but, when in barracks, a soldier's life in India is commonly very easy. They have not unfrequently eight or nine successive nights in bed; and, as the climate is generally very dry, they are not liable to get their arms or accoutrements often wet; and many of them likewise keep black boys to clean their things, take their victuals upon guard, and relieve them of other labours. They had consequently much spare time which they did not know how to get rid of; "and an idle man (says Mr. Bucke) is his own tormentor, always full of wants and complaints; while his inactivity often proves fatal both to his body and his mind. The worst importunities, the most embarrassing perplexities of business, are softness and luxury, compared with the incessant cravings of vacancy, and the unsatisfactory expedients of idleness." It is a saying among the Turks, that a "busy man is troubled with one devil, but the idle man with twenty."

The want of exercise for both body and mind therefore, and the natural consequences of a sultry climate upon the constitution, rendered a soldier's life in these circumstances truly a burden, for he was unable to walk abroad through the day because of the intense heat, and, moreover, the regiment was not unfrequently confined to barracks, on account of their misconduct. Now, if you consider such numbers of men as I formerly mentioned living together in one barrack-room, some sleeping away their time⁶, and others lounging about the piazzas, not knowing what to do with themselves, you will not find much difficulty in perceiving that these poor creatures were eminently exposed to become the prey of him that "walketh about as a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour." Those, on the other hand, who were disposed to improve their time, by reading their Bibles⁷, or conversing upon religious or useful subjects, were disturbed by the devil's agents, even those who "were led captive by him at his will;" for when these debauched beings, in their rambles, observed any of their comrades thus employed, they would make up a plot to annoy them, by singing obscene songs, cursing and swearing in their very ears, or by tumbling one another in a riotous manner upon these Sammy Hawks⁸, as they were called. This species of persecution being frequently repeated, we may wonder the less that those who had not the root of the matter in them, were discouraged, and, in this time of temptation, fell away; and that, in process of time, instead of reading their Bibles, or conversing upon religious subjects, they preferred taking a cheerful glass together, which would at once relieve them from such assaults, enliven that gloom which brooded over their minds, transport them in imagination to Glasgow⁹, to see how the shuttle was flying, and afterwards to close the scene with their favourite song,

"Glasgow on the banks of the river Clyde."

In this way many of those who might be called the sober and decent part of the regiment, gradually fell from their steadfastness, and became as dissipated as those whom they had condemned. From the miserable languor produced by idleness and the climate, they now did not bethink themselves of any other refuge than liquor; mustering a fuddle as often as possible; which is by two or three of them clubbing together for a rupee's worth of arrack¹⁰; and it was no uncommon thing to hear it said, on these occasions, that it was of no use for them to lay up money for others to spend; and as their comrades were dying so fast, and they did not know how soon it would be their turn, it was the best way to be merry when they had it in their power; saying in effect, "Let us eat and drink, for to-morrow we die." In their drunken rambles they would often have altercations amongst themselves, or with the noncommissioned officers, when trying to keep good order amongst them, which brought them under one or more breaches of the articles of war; and this not unfrequently terminated in their pain and dishonour, by their being exposed to corporal punishment in the front of the regiment. To those who had any regard to their good name, this was a severe trial, and the effect generally was, that it either cast them into a despondency of mind, or more commonly rendered them utterly regardless of their character ever afterwards.

I may also notice a circumstance which had not a little influence in spreading this evil contagion amongst us.

After we crossed the equinoctial line, going to India, it was the notion of a number, even of the men who seemed to have had something like religious instruction, that they were then under no obligations to keep the sabbath, saying, that there was no sabbath beyond the line. This sentiment became a matter of frequent discussion amongst many of them, and seemed to receive a very welcome reception. I could not suppose that they were in earnest in this opinion, until they manifested by their conduct either that they really believed it, or that they had succeeded in silencing their conscience on the subject; for, after passing the line, they made no scruple whatever of whistling and singing, and passing the sabbath day in vain and unprofitable discourse, if not in profane talking and jesting. On their arrival in India, their notions were still farther confirmed by the irreligious and profane example set before them by our countrymen of all ranks. As they were in a land of heathens they thought they had liberty to live as heathens. The contagion spread rapidly in the regiment, and cast down many wounded; and not a few of those whom I thought to be strong men were slain by it.

The Apostolic injunction against the dangerous consequences of evil principle and evil example is, "Be not deceived, evil communications corrupt good manners." I will now, as I promised, illustrate these remarks by one or two examples, and Oh! how it pains me to think that ever I should have it in my power to draw these illustrations from the conduct of those whom I once loved; but I hope my reader will not blame me, as what I shall mention now cannot disturb the mouldering ashes of my once dear companions, and as their names shall be concealed, lest it might give a wound to the hearts of their relatives, if this little work should come in their way, which nothing could heal.

The reasons I select the following persons in preference to many others are, first, that I was intimately acquainted with them, and am, therefore, under no hazard of being led into any mistake about what I am going to write; and the other is, that when I see this, I may remember my former dangerous situation, and have something before me well calculated to excite my thankfulness to that Power, who has preserved me from being wrecked upon those rocks, which dashed them to pieces.

The reader may recollect that I was formerly a fifer in the grenadier company of the 26th Regiment, and also that there were a great number of the men took the bounty from that corps and went to the Royals. While I was in that company and regiment I had a young man for my comrade, whom I shall call J. F. who was a man of very sober habits, being given to none of those vices for which soldiers are remarkable; nay, he was even so much averse to swearing, that he used to reprove me frequently for making use of what are generally termed minced oaths, to which I was then much addicted, but by means of his repeated friendly and seasonable admonitions, I was at last enabled to leave them off. After we came to India, however, he attached himself to some of those men who had imbibed the libertine principles mentioned above, and with these "evil men and seducers, he waxed worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived." Solomon's question is a pertinent one: "Can a man carry fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burnt? Can a man walk upon hot coals and his feet not be burnt?" Alas, my poor friend soon forgot his own admonitions to me, about my swearing when in Dublin; and when I reminded him of them, he only laughed me to scorn; for the oaths I made use of at that time, when he acted so friendly a part in pointing out to me the evil of the practice, were to him now quite insignificant. Nothing, in regard to swearing, appeared to satisfy him now but the great and dreadful names of Jehovah, and those glorious attributes by which he makes himself known; nor was this all, for he became a mocker at every thing sacred, making himself acquainted with the word of God, for no other reason than as a store-house whence he might amply supply himself with expressions which he could pervert to the purposes of buffoonery, and that he might be able to pour down vollies of raillery upon all those who had even but a small form of godliness¹¹. To show you how far his wickedness carried him, I may mention, that at one time he and another of his lewd companions went at night to the hospital where a woman's husband was lying a corpse, and she sitting up with the remains of him who was once loved but now departed, each having a white sheet about him, to make the poor affrighted and rather superstitious female believe, that it was the husband returned from the other world, attended by some of his kindred spirits to pay her a visit, which almost put the poor woman out of her mind. This piece of barbarous conduct was made up, else it would have probably cost them both their serjeants' coats.

The reader may easily suppose that I had, long ere now, ceased to keep company with him; for all my attempts to show him the inconsistency and criminality of his conduct had long before this time proved useless. I therefore saw it to be my duty to keep at a distance from him, for the admonition is, "from such withdraw thyself."

To be short, he was seized by the flux in Trichinopoly, of which disorder he died. I have said that he had been long to me "as a heathen man and a publican;" but when I heard that he was dangerously ill, I was certainly very sorry for the poor lad, and went up as soon as I could find it convenient to see him, which was the night before we marched for Bangalore. I asked about his complaint, and if he thought he was getting any better. He said he was very ill, and not likely to get better.

Fain would I have spoken to him about his spiritual malady, which was my greatest concern, but I was afraid to be rash, lest he should take it rather as a reproach than as a friendly inquiry or salutary admonition, and therefore waited a little to see if he would break in upon the subject first. He was not long in partly relieving my anxiety, by saying, he had been a very wicked man. This he acknowledged in the general, and did not condescend to particulars; but in a very few words said he was afraid he would soon die; and, like most men who have led a wicked life, he added, that if he got better he would never be what he had been, and that he had been long J. F. but he would be so no longer. To which I answered, I hope you may not; but without strength to aid your resolutions, I am afraid there will be little change for the better; and having pointed him to the only refuge for sinners, even to him "who is able to save to the very uttermost," I left him: but how did it strike like a dart through my liver, when we arrived at the first camp ground from Trichinopoly, to hear that poor J. F. was no longer in the land of the living, and in the place of hope. This was truly a melancholy case, but I will not say that it was without hope, for he who saved one at the last hour, was able also to save him. But this is no encouragement for us "to continue in sin, that grace may abound." There is indeed one case mentioned in Scripture of a person being saved at the last hour, that none may despair, and but one, that none may presume. Ah! my dear reader, let not you and I hazard our eternal all on such an uncertainty, for these are dreadful words: "Because I have called, and ye refused; I have stretched out my Hand, and no man regarded; but ye have set at nought all my counsel, and would none of my reproof; I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when your fear cometh: when your fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you. Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me: for that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the Lord: they would have none of my counsel; they despised all my reproof: therefore shall they eat of the fruit of their own way, and be filled with their own devices." Now, "consider this, ye that forget God, lest he tear you in pieces when there is none to deliver."

The other person whom I shall mention was formerly a ploughman, and had enlisted into the army upon account of some love affair. While in the above capacity, he had formed an intimacy with his master's daughter; and, from what I could learn, they were remarkably attached to each other. But the father of the young woman directly opposing his parental authority to their union, the young man took it so much to heart, that he went and joined himself to a party of the Royal Scots as a private soldier; and by this step, he, like too many, punished himself for the fault of another.

My first acquaintance with W. H. was after we came to Wallajahbad; and we used to spend many a happy hour together when in barracks, and even upon the march, talking over old stories, and singing the songs of our native land, – "which softened our hardships, – cheered our lonely hearts, – brought to our recollection the images of those friends from whom we had departed, while fond hope whispered that we would yet revisit these scenes, – converse with these friends, – and renew these joys. In this sadly pleasing retrospect, and joyful anticipation, we lost the sense of our sorrows, and journeyed onward with increased vigour." Neither did the day of the Lord pass by us altogether unimproved; for then we used to meet together for religious conversation, and particularly upon the Sabbath evenings, when I was waiting for tattoo-beating, in the front of the barracks¹². But, alas! poor man, he gradually lost the relish for divine things, by forming a connexion with some debauched characters; and keeping company with these jovial fellows, as they are called, he soon became a very different man.

However, I never had reason to think, neither did I ever hear, that he was guilty of those enormities with which the other person has been too justly charged; and when I expostulated with him about his conduct, he took it always apparently in good part, and promised to do better; but after repeatedly repenting in a kind of a way, and as often "returning like the dog to his vomit," he avoided my company altogether; and at any time when I went to see him, if he observed me coming in at one barrack-room door, he would immediately go out at another, being unable to answer to me for his conduct; and my presence grieved him, as it called to his mind the many happy hours of profitable and innocent enjoyment we had spent in one another's company. So true it is that guilt is a coward, and that "the wicked flee when no man pursueth."

At last he was seized by the flux, in Trichinopoly, where, as I mentioned, J. F. also died. He had been in the hospital a considerable time before I knew of his illness; and when I went up to see him, I observed that he was drawing very near his end. The agony he endured at that time was pressing the sweat through every pore of his body. Yet he was perfectly sensible; for when I spoke to him, he answered me in a very rational manner. But if the Lord be pleased to continue to me my reason and memory, until I also depart from this vale of tears, I think I will remember his last words until that hour. – After conversing a little with him, and when about to take my leave, I said to him, if it was the will of God that we should never again see one another in this world, I hoped we would meet in another and a better world. He answered me in the few following, but awfully important words, "I know how I am, but I know not how I may be;" taking (as good Mr. Boston expresses it) a leap in the dark, not knowing whether he should land in heaven or in hell. After making inquiry the next morning, I learned that his spirit returned to God who gave it about two hours after I left him. Having gone from our world, we cannot, we ought not, to follow him any farther; only this I will say, that he has received his sentence from him who can do him no wrong; for, "Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?"

Now, from what we have seen of the life and death of these poor men, we may justly conclude that "the way of transgressors is hard." It was the saying of an old divine, that it required a person much harder labour to be damned than to be saved. We must acknowledge the idea to be just, although it may appear to be strangely expressed. But certain and true it is, that although these ways may seem right unto a man while he is walking in them, yet the end thereof is death. Now, although these persons whom I have just mentioned did not shoot themselves nor any of their comrades, yet the reader will easily perceive, by their conduct, the bad effects of evil principles and evil practices, which evidently led to the commission of such crimes as I have too justly charged upon some of the regiment.