Kitabı oku: «The Elect Lady», sayfa 13
CHAPTER XXXV. AFTER THE VERDICT
Through the governor of the jail Andrew obtained permission to stand near the prisoner at the trial. The counsel for the prosecution did all he could, and the counsel for the defense not much—at least Dawtie’s friends thought so—and the judge summed up with the greatest impartiality. Dawtie’s simplicity and calmness, her confidence devoid of self-assertion, had its influence on the jury, and they gave the uncomfortable verdict of “Not Proven,” so that Dawtie was discharged.
Alexa had a carriage ready to take her home. As Dawtie went to it she whispered to her husband:
“Ye hae to tak me wantin’ a character, Andrew.”
“Jesus went home without a character, and was well received,” said Andrew, with a smile. “You’ll be over to-night to see the old folk?”
“Yes, Andrew; I’m sure the mistress will let me.”
“Don’t say a word to her of our marriage, except she has heard, and mentions it. I want to tell her myself. You will find me at the croft when you come, and I will go back with you.”
In the evening Dawtie came, and brought the message that her mistress would like to see him.
When he entered the room Alexa rose to meet him. He stopped short.
“I thank you, ma’am,” he said, “for your great kindness to Dawtie. We were married in the prison. She is my wife now.”
“Married! Your wife?” echoed Alexa, flushing, and drawing back a step.
“I had loved her long, ma’am; and when trouble came her the time came for me to stand by her side.”
“You had not spoken to her then—till—”
“Not till last night. I said before the governor of the prison and Mrs. Innes that we were husband and wife. If you please, ma’am, we shall have the proper ceremony as soon as possible.”
“I wish I had known,” said Alexa—almost to herself, with a troubled smile.
“I wish you had, ma’am,” responded Andrew. She raised her face with a look of confidence.
“Will you please to forget, Andrew?”
Nobility had carried the day. She had not one mean thought either of him or the girl.
“To forget is not in man’s power, ma’am; but I shall never think a thought you would wish unthought.”
She held out her hand to him. They were friends forever.
“Will you be married here, Andrew? The house is at your service,” she said.
“Don’t you think it ought to be at her father’s, ma’am?”
“You are right,” said Alexa; and she sat down.
Andrew stood in silence, for he saw she was meditating something. At length she raised her head, and spoke.
“You have been compelled to take the step sooner than you intended—have you not?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Then you can hardly be so well prepared as you would like to be!”
“We shall manage.”
“It will hardly be convenient for your mother, I fear! You have nowhere else to take her—have you?”
“No, ma’am; but my mother loves us both. And,” he added, simply, “where there’s room for me, there’s room for her now!”
“Would you mind if I asked you how your parents take it?”
“They don’t say much. You see, ma’am, we are all proud until we learn that we have one Master, and we all are brethren. But they will soon get over it.”
When I see a man lifting up those that are beneath him, not pulling down those that are above him, I will believe in his communism. Those who most resent being looked down upon, are in general the readiest to look down upon others. It is not principle, it is not truth, it is themselves they regard. Of all false divinities, Self is the most illogical.
“If God had been the mighty monarch they represent Him,” continued Andrew, “He would never have let us come near Him!”
“Did you hear Mr. Rackstraw’s sermon on the condescension of God?” asked Alexa.
“The condescension of God, ma’am! There is no such thing. God never condescended, with one Jove-like nod, all his mighty, eternal life! God condescend to His children—their spirits born of His spirit, their hearts the children of His heart! No, ma’am! there never was a falser, uglier word in any lying sermon!”
His eyes flashed and his face shone. Alexa thought she had never seen him look so grand.
“I see!” she answered. “I will never use the word about God again!”
“Thank you, ma’am.”
“Why should you thank me?”
“I beg your pardon; I had no right to thank you. But I am so tried with the wicked things said about God by people who think they are speaking to His pleasure and not in his despite, that I am apt to talk foolishly. I don’t wonder at God’s patience with the wicked, but I do wonder at His patience with the pious!”
“They don’t know better!”
“How are they to know better while they are so sure about everything! I would infinitely rather believe in no God at all, than in such a God as they would have me believe in!”
“Oh, but Andrew, I had not a glimmer of what you meant—of what you really objected to, or what you loved! Now, I can not even recall what it was I did not like in your teaching. I think it was that, instead of listening to know what you meant, I was always thinking how to oppose you, or trying to find out by what name you were to be called. One time I thought you were an Arminian, another time a Socinian, then a Swedenborgian, then an Arian! I read a history of the sects of the middle ages, just to see where I could set you down. I told people you did not believe this, and did not believe that, when I knew neither what you believed, nor what you did not believe. I thought I did, but it was all mistake and imagination. When you would not discuss things with me, I thought you were afraid of losing the argument. Now I see that, instead of disputing about opinions, I should have been saying: ‘God be merciful to me a sinner!’”
“God be praised!” said Andrew. “Ma’am, you are a free woman! The Father has called you, and you have said: ‘Here I am.’”
“I hope so, Andrew, thanks to God by you! But I am forgetting what I wanted to say! Would it not be better—after you are married, I mean—to let Dawtie stay with me awhile?—I will promise you not to work her too hard,” she added, with a little laugh.
“I see, ma’am! It is just like you! You want people to know that you believe in her!”
“Yes; but I want also to do what I can to keep such good tenants. Therefore I must add a room or two to your house, that there may be good accommodation for you all.”
“You make thanks impossible, ma’am! I will speak to Dawtie about it. I know she will be glad not to leave you! I will take care not to trouble the house.”
“You shall do just as Dawtie and you please. Where Dawtie is, there will be room for you!”
Already Alexa’s pain had grown quite bearable.
Dawtie needed no persuading. She was so rich in the possession of Andrew that she could go a hundred years without seeing him, she said. It was only that he would come and see her, instead of her going to see him!
In ten days they were married at her father’s cottage. Her father and mother then accompanied her and Andrew to the Knowe, to dine with Andrew’s father and mother. In the evening the new pair went out for a walk in the old fields.
“It seems, Dawtie, as if God was here!” said Andrew.
“I would fain see him, Andrew! I would rather you went out than God!”
“Suppose he was nowhere, Dawtie?”
“If God werena in you, ye wadna be what ye are to yer ignorant Dawtie, Andrew! She needs her Father in h’aven sairer nor her Andrew! But I’m sayin’ things sae true ‘at it’s jist silly to say them! Eh, it’s like h’aven itsel’ to be oot o’ that prison, an’ walkin’ aboot wi’ you! God has gien me a’ thing!—jist a’ thing, Andrew!”
“God was wi’ ye i’ the prison, Dawtie!”
“Ay! But I like better to be wi’ Him here!”
“An’ ye may be sure He likes better to ha’e ye here!” rejoined Andrew.
CHAPTER XXXVI. AGAIN THE GOBLET
The next day Alexa set Dawtie to search the house yet again for the missing goblet.
“It must be somewhere!” she said. “We are beset with an absolute contradiction: the thing can’t be in the house! and it must be in the house!”
“If we do find it,” returned Dawtie, “folk’ll say them ‘at could hide could weel seek! I s’ luik naegait wantin’ you, mem!”
The study was bare of books, and the empty shelves gave no hint of concealment They stood in its dreariness looking vaguely round them.
“Did it ever come to ye, mem,” said Dawtie, “that a minute or twa passed between Mr. Crawford comin’ doon the stair wi’ you, and me gaein’ up to the maister? When I gaed intil the room, he lay pantin’ i’ the bed; but as I broodit upo’ ilka thing alane i’ the prison, he cam afore me, there i’ the bed, as gien he had gotten oot o’ ‘t, and hidden awa’ the cup, and was jist gotten intil’t again, the same moment I cam in.”
“Dying people will do strange things!” rejoined her mistress. “But it brings us no nearer the cup!”
“The surer we are, the better we’ll seek!” said Dawtie.
They began, and went over the room thoroughly—looking everywhere they could think of. They had all but given it up to go on elsewhere, when Dawtie, standing again in the middle and looking about in a sort of unconscious hopelessness, found her eyes on the mantel-shelf, and went and laid her hand upon it. It was of wood, and she fancied it a little loose, but she could not move it.
“When Andrew comes we’ll get him to examine it!” said Alexa.
He came in the evening, and Alexa told him what they had been doing. She begged him to get tools, and see whether there was not a space under the mantel-shelf. But Andrew, accustomed to ponder contrivances with Sandy, would have a good look at it first He came presently upon a clever little spring, pressing which he could lift the shelf: there under it, sure enough, in rich response to the candle he held, flashed the gems of the curiously wrought chalice of gold! Alexa gave a cry, Andrew drew a deep breath, Dawtie laughed like a child. How they gazed on it, passed it from one to the other, pored over the gems, and over the raised work that inclosed them, I need not tell. They began to talk about what was to be done with it.
“We will send it to the earl!” said Alexa.
“No,” said Andrew; “that would be to make ourselves judges in the case! Your father must have paid money for it; he gave it to Mr. Crawford, and Mr. Crawford must not be robbed!”
“Stop, Andrew!” said Alexa. “Everything in the next room was left to my cousin, with the library in this; whatever else was left him was individually described. The cup was not in the next room, and was not mentioned. Providence has left us to do with it as we may judge right. I think it ought to be taken to Borland Hall—and by Dawtie.”
“Well! She will mention that your father bought it?”
“I will not take a shilling for it!”
“Is not that because you are not quite sure you have the right to dispose of it?”
“I would not take the price of it if my father had left the cup expressly to me!”
“Had he done so, you would have a right to what he paid for it. To give the earl the choice of securing it, would be a service rendered him. If he were too poor to buy it, the thing would have to be considered.”
“Nothing could make me touch money for it. George would never doubt we had concealed it in order to trick him out of it!”
“He will think so all the same. It will satisfy him, and not a few beside, that Dawtie ought to have been convicted. The thing is certainly Mr. Crawford’s—that is, his as not yours. Your father undoubtedly meant him to have the cup; and God would not have you, even to serve the right, take advantage of an accident. Whatever ought to be done with the cup, Mr. Crawford ought to do it; it is his business to do right in regard to it; and whatever advantage may be gained by doing right, Mr. Crawford ought to have the chance of gaining it. Would you deprive him of the opportunity, to which at least he has a right, of doing justice, and delivering his soul?”
“You would have us tell the earl that his cup is found, but Mr. Crawford claims it?” said Alexa.
“Andrew would have us take it to Mr. Crawford,” said Dawtie, “and tell him that the earl has a claim to it.”
“Tell him also,” said Andrew, “where it was found, showing he has no legal right to it; and tell him he has no more moral right to it than the laird could give him. Tell him, ma’am,” continued Andrew, “that you expect him to take it to the earl, that he may buy it if he will; and say that if, after a fortnight, you find it is not in the earl’s possession, you will yourself ascertain from him whether the offer has been made him.”
“That is just right,” said Alexa.
And so the thing was done. The cup is now in the earl’s collection, and without any further interference on her part.
A few days after she and Dawtie carried the cup to Crawford, a parcel arrived at Potlurg, containing a beautiful silver case, and inside the case the jeweled watch—with a letter from George, begging Alexa to accept his present, and assuring her of his conviction that the moment he annoyed her with any further petition, she would return it. He expressed his regret that he had brought such suffering upon Dawtie, and said he was ready to make whatever amends her husband might think fit.
Alexa accepted the watch, and wore it. She thought her father would like her to do so.
CHAPTER XXXVII. THE HOUR BEFORE DAWN
The friendship of the three was never broken. I will not say that, as she lay awake in the dark, the eyes of Alexa never renewed the tears of that autumn night on which she turned her back upon the pride of self, but her tears were never those of bitterness, of self-scorn, or of self-pity.
“If I am to be pitied,” she would say to herself, “let the Lord pity me! I am not ashamed, and will not be sorry. I have nothing to resent; no one has wronged me.”
Andrew died in middle age. His wife said the Master wanted him for something nobody else could do, or He would not have taken him from her. She wept and took comfort, for she lived in expectation.
One night when she and Alexa were sitting together at Potlurg, about a month after his burial, speaking of many things with the freedom of a long and tried love, Alexa said, after a pause of some duration:
“Were you not very angry with me then, Dawtie?”
“When, ma’am?”
“When Andrew told you.”
“Told me what, ma’am? I must be stupid to-night, for I can’t think what you mean.”
“When he told you I wanted him, not knowing he was yours.”
“I ken naething o’ what ye’re mintin’ at, mem,” persisted Dawtie, in a tone of bewilderment.
“Oh! I thought you had no secrets from one another.”
“I don’t know that we ever had—except things in his books that he said were God’s secrets, which I should understand some day, for God was telling them as fast as He could get his children to understand them.”
“I see,” sighed Alexa; “you were made for each other. But this is my secret, and I have the right to tell it. He kept it for me to tell you. I thought all the time you knew it.”
“I don’t want to know anything Andrew would not tell me.”
“He thought it was my secret, you see, not his, and that was why he did not tell you.”
“Of coarse, ma’am. Andrew always did what was right.”
“Well, then, Dawtie—I offered to be his wife if he would have me.”
“And what did he say?” asked Dawtie, with the composure of one listening to a story learned from a book.
“He told me he couldn’t. But I’m not sure what he said. The words went away.”
“When was it he asked you?” said Dawtie, sunk in thought.
“The night but one before the trial,” answered Alexa.
“He micht hae ta’en you, then, i’stead o’ me—a lady an’ a’. Oh, mem! do you think he took me ‘cause I was in trouble? He micht hae been laird himsel’.”
“Dawtie! Dawtie!” cried Alexa. “If you think that would have weighed with Andrew, I ought to have been his wife, for I know him better than you.”
Dawtie smiled at that.
“But I do know, mem,” she said, “that Andrew was fit to cast the lairdship frae him to comfort ony puir lassie. I would ha’ lo’ed him a’ the same.”
“As I have done, Dawtie,” said Alexa, solemnly. “But he wouldn’t have thrown me away for you, if he hadn’t loved you, Dawtie. Be sure of that. He might have made nothing of the lairdship, but he wouldn’t have made nothing of me.”
“That’s true, mem. I dinna doobt it.”
“I love him still—and you mustn’t mind me saying it, Dawtie. There are ways of loving that are good, though there be some pain in them. Thank God, we have our children to look after. You will let me say our children, won’t you, Dawtie?”
Some thought Alexa hard, some thought her cold, but the few that knew her knew she was neither; and some of my readers will grant that such a friend as Andrew was better than such a husband as George.
