Wer hätte noch nicht vom inneren Kind gehört? Mittlerweile gibt es wunderbare Methoden, um die zugrundeliegenden Ängste und Frustrationen zu erkennen, zu lindern und sogar zu heilen.

Aber jedes innere Kind hat eben auch Eltern. Die inneren Eltern sind die Summe der Erfahrungen, die man mit den leiblichen Eltern gemacht hat.

Hätte man nun perfekte Eltern gehabt, wären die inneren Eltern ein Quell von Kraft und Liebe. Man könnte sein Leben frei und ohne größere Konflikte leben. Es gibt aber logischerweise keine perfekten Eltern, denn auch diese tragen oft tiefe Verletzungen in sich, und geben ihre negativen Erfahrungen ungewollt weiter.

So inszeniert sich die Summe des Selbstbildes, das von den Eltern in ein Kind hinein erzogen wurde, im Erwachsenenalter stets aufs Neue im Alltag. Man kann zum Beispiel gar nicht anders auf eine Autoritätsperson reagieren als die inneren Eltern es aufgrund unserer Erfahrungen in der Kindheit gestalten. Die inneren Eltern sind also nicht einfach Gefühlserinnerungen, sondern in der Gegenwart aktiv wirkende Inszenierungen, die aus dem Wunsch nach Lösung entstehen: endlich Hilfe bekommen, endlich gesehen, anerkannt und geliebt werden. So schaffen wir uns stets aufs Neue Verhältnisse oder Situationen, die uns das Leben entsetzlich schwermachen können.

Die gute Nachricht: Für die Handlungen unserer inneren Eltern sind wir selbst verantwortlich. Daher können wir sie, im Gegensatz zu unseren echten Eltern, liebevoll dazu bringen, sich zu ändern. Kim Fohlenstein zeigt, wie es uns mithilfe von Ehrlichkeit und Mut zur Selbstreflexion gelingen kann, mit diesen verdrängten Anteilen in Kontakt zu kommen und aus der erschöpfenden Wiederholung der altbekannten Situationen und Gefühle auszusteigen.

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«Das Vermächtnis deiner inneren Eltern», Kim Fohlenstein benzeri kitaplar