Kitabı oku: «Jack Hinton: The Guardsman», sayfa 32

CHAPTER XLVIII. AN UNHAPPY DISCLOSURE

‘What!’ cried I, as I awoke the next morning, and looked with amazement at the figure which waddled across the room with a hoot in either hand – ‘what! not Corny Delany, surely?’

‘Ugh! that same,’ said he, with a cranky croak. ‘I don’t wonder ye don’t know me; hardship’s telling on me every day.’

Now really, in vindication of my father’s household, in which Sir Corny had been domesticated for the last two months, I must observe that the alteration in his appearance was not exactly such as to justify his remark; on the contrary, he had grown fatter and more ruddy, and looked in far better case than I had ever seen him. His face, however, most perseveringly preserved its habitual sour and crabbed expression, rather increased, than otherwise, by his improved condition.

‘So, Corny, you are not comfortable here, I find?’

‘Comfortable! The ways of this place would kill the Danes! Nothing but ringing bells from morning till night; carriages drivin’ like wind up to the door, and bang, bang away at the rapper; then more ringing to let them out again; and bells for breakfast and for luncheon and the hall dinner; and then the sight of vitals that’s wasted – meat and fish and fowl and vegetables without end. Ugh! the Haythins, the Turks! eating and drinking as if the world was all their own.’

‘Well, apparently they take good care of you in that respect’

‘Devil a bit of care; here it’s every man for himself. But I’ll give warning on Saturday; sorrow one o’ me ‘ll be kilt for the like of them.’

‘You prefer Ireland, then, Corny?’

‘Who said I did?’ said he snappishly; ‘isn’t it as bad there? Ugh, ugh! the Captain won’t rest aisy in his grave after the way he treated me – leaving me here alone and dissolate in this place, amongst strangers!’

‘Well, you must confess the country is not so bad.’

‘And why would I confess it? What’s in it that I don’t mislike? Is it the heap of houses and the smoke and the devil’s noise that’s always going on that I’d like? Why isn’t it peaceful and quiet like Dublin?’

And as I conversed further with him, I found that all his dislikes proceeded from the discrepancy he everywhere discovered from what he had been accustomed to in Ireland, and which, without liking, he still preferred to our Saxon observances – the few things he saw worthy of praise being borrowed or stolen from his own side of the Channel And in this his ingenuity was striking, insomuch that the very trees in Woburn Park owed their goodness to the owner having been once a Lord Lieutenant in Ireland, where, as Corny expressed it, ‘devil thank him to have fine trees! hadn’t he the pick of the Fhaynix?’

I knew that candour formed a most prominent feature in Mr. Delany’s character, and consequently had little difficulty in ascertaining his opinion of every member of my family; indeed, to do him justice, no one ever required less of what is called pumping. His judgment on things and people flowed from him without effort or restraint, so that ere half an hour elapsed he had expatiated on my mothers pride and vanity, apostrophised my father’s hastiness and determination, and was quite prepared to enter upon a critical examination of my cousin Julia’s failings, concerning whom, to my astonishment, he was not half so lenient as I expected.

‘Arrah, isn’t she like the rest of them, coorting one day with Captain Phil, and another with the young lord there, and then laughing at them both with the ould duke that comes here to dinner! She thinks I don’t be minding her; but didn’t I see her taking myself off one day on paper – making a drawing of me, as if I was a haste! Mayhe there’s worse nor me,’ said the little man, looking down upon his crooked shins and large knee-joints with singular complacency; ‘and mayhe she’d get one of them yet.’ À harsh cackle, the substitute for a laugh, closed this speech.

‘Breakfast on the table, sir,’ said a servant, tapping gently at the door.

‘I’ll engage it is, and will be till two o’clock, when they’ll be calling out for luncheon,’ said Corny, turning up the whites of his eyes, as though the profligate waste of the house was a sin he wished to wash his hands of. ‘That wasn’t the way at his honour the Jidge’s; he’d never taste a bit from morning till night; and many a man he ‘d send to his long account in the meantime. Ugh! I wish I was back there.’

‘I have spent many happy days in Ireland, too,’ said I, scarce following him in more than the general meaning of his speech.

A fit of coughing from Corny interrupted his reply, but as he left the room I could hear his muttered meditations, something in this strain: ‘Happy days, indeed! A dacent life you led! tramping about the country with a fool, horse-riding and fighting! Ugh!’

I found my cousin in the breakfast-room alone; my father had already gone out; and as Lady Charlotte never left her room before three or four o’clock, I willingly took the opportunity of our tête-à-tête to inquire into the cause of the singular reception I had met with, and to seek an explanation, if so might be, of the viceroy’s change towards me since his visit to England.

Julia entered frankly and freely into the whole matter, with the details of which, though evidently not trusting me to the full, she was somehow perfectly conversant.

‘My dear John,’ said she, ‘your whole conduct in Ireland has been much mistaken – ’

‘Calumniated, apparently, were the better word, Julia,’ said I hastily.

‘Nay, hear me out. It is so easy, when people have no peculiar reasons to vindicate another, to misconstrue, perhaps condemn. It is so much the way of the world to look at things in their worst light, that I am sure you will see no particular ingenuity was required to make your career in Dublin appear a wild one, and your life in the country still more so. Now you are growing impatient; you are getting angry; so I shall stop.’

‘No, no, Julia; a thousand pardons if a passing shade of indignation did show itself in my face. Pray go on.’

‘Well then, when a young gentleman, whose exclusive leanings were even a little quizzed here – there, no impatience! – condescends at one spring to frequent third-rate people’s houses; falls in love with a niece, or daughter, or a something there; plays high among riotous associates; makes rash wagers; and fights with his friends, who endeavour to rescue him – ’

‘Thank you, Julia – a thousand thanks, sweet cousin! The whole narrative and its author are palpably before me.’

A deep blush covered her cheek as I rose hastily from my chair.

‘John, dear John, sit down again,’ said she, ‘I have only been in jest all this time. You surely do not suppose me silly enough to credit one word of all this?’

‘It must have been told you, however,’ said I, fixing my eyes on her as I spoke.

The redness of her cheek grew deeper, and her confusion increased to a painful extent, as, taking my hand in hers, she said in a low, soft voice —

‘I have been very, very foolish; but you will promise me never to remember – at least never to act upon – the – ’

The words became fainter and fainter as she spoke, and at last died away inaudibly; and suddenly there shot across my mind the passage in O’Grady’s letter. The doubt once suggested, gained strength at every moment: she loved De Vere. I will not attempt to convey the conflicting storm of passion this thought stirred up within me.

I turned towards her. Her head was thrown gently back, and her deep-blue lustrous eyes were fixed on me as if waiting my reply. A tear rolled heavily along her cheek; it was the first I ever saw her shed. Pressing her hand to my lips, I muttered the words, ‘Trust me, Julia,’ and left the room. ‘Sir George wishes to see you, sir, in his own room,’ said a servant, as I stood stunned and overcome by the discovery I had made of my cousin’s affection. I had no time given me for further reflection as I followed the man to my father’s room.

‘Sit down, Jack,’ said my father, as he turned the key in the door. ‘I wish to talk to you alone here. I have been with the duke this morning; a little explanation has satisfied him that your conduct was perfectly irreproachable in Ireland. He writes by this post to the viceroy to make the whole thing clear, and indeed he offered to reinstate you at once – which I refused, however. Now to something graver still, my boy, and which I wish I could spare you; but it cannot be.’

As he spoke these words he leaned his head in both his hands, and was silent. A confused, imperfect sense of some impending bad news almost stupefied me, and I waited without speaking. When my father lifted up his head his face was pale and care-worn, and an expression such as long illness leaves had usurped the strong and manly character of his countenance.

‘Come, my boy, I must not keep you longer in suspense. Fortune has dealt hardly with me since we parted. Jack, I am a beggar!’

A convulsive gulp and a rattling sound in the throat followed the words, and for a second or two his fixed looks and purple colour made me fear a fit was approaching. But in a few minutes he recovered his calmness, and proceeded, still with a broken and tremulous voice, to relate the circumstances of his altered fortune.

It appeared that many British officers of high rank had involved themselves deeply in a loan to the Spanish Government, under the faith of speedy repayment. The varying chances of the Peninsular struggle had given this loan all the character of a gambling speculation, the skill in which consisted in the anticipation of the result of the war we were then engaged in. My father’s sanguine hopes of ultimate success induced him to enter deeply into the speculation, from which, having once engaged, there was no retreat. Thousand after thousand followed, to secure the sum already advanced; and at last, hard pressed by the increasing demands for money, and confident that the first turn of fortune would lead to repayment, he had made use of the greater part of my cousin Julia’s fortune, whose guardian he was, and in whose hands this trust-money had been left My cousin would come of age in about four months, at which time she would be eighteen; and then, if the money were not forthcoming, the consequences were utter ruin, with the terrific blow of blasted character and reputation.

There was a sum of ten thousand pounds settled on me by my grandfather, which I at once offered to place at his disposal.

‘Alas, my poor fellow! I have advanced already upwards of thirty thousand of Julia’s fortune! No, no, Jack, I have thought much over the matter; there is but one way of escaping from this difficulty. By disposing of these bonds at considerable loss, I shall be enabled to pay Julia’s money. This will leave us little better than above actual want; still, it must be done. I shall solicit a command abroad; they’ll not refuse me, I know. Lady Charlotte must retire to Bath, or some quiet place, which in my absence will appear less remarkable. Strict economy and time will do much. And as to yourself, I know that having once learned what you have to look to I shall have no cause of complaint on your score; the duke has promised to take care of you. And now my heart is lighter than it has been for some months past.’

Before my father had ceased speaking the shock of his news had gradually subsided with me, and I was fully intent on the details by which he hoped to escape his embarrassments. My mother was my first thought. Lady Charlotte, I knew, could never encounter her changed condition; she was certain to sink under the very shock of it. My father, however, supposed that she need not be told its full extent; that, by management, the circumstances should be gradually made known to her; and he hoped, too, that her interest in her husband and son, both absent from her, would withdraw her thoughts in great measure from the routine of fashionable life, and fix them in a channel more homely and domestic.

‘Besides,’ added he, with more animation of voice, ‘they may offer me some military appointment in the colonies, where she could accompany me; and this will prevent an exposure. And, after all, Jack, there is nothing else for it.’ As he said this he fixed his eyes on me, as though rather asking than answering the question.

Not knowing what to reply, I was silent.

‘You were fond of Julia, as a boy,’ said he carelessly.

The blood rushed to my cheek, as I answered, ‘Yes, sir; but – but – ’

‘But you have outgrown that?’ added he, with a smile.

‘Not so much, sir, as that she has forgotten me. In fact, I believe we are excellent cousins.’

‘And it is not now, my dear boy, I would endeavour to make you more to each other. What is not a union of inclination shall never be one of sordid interest. Besides, Jack, why should we not take the field together? The very thought of it makes me feel young enough!’

I saw his lip quiver as he spoke; and unable to bear more, I wrung his hand warmly, and hurried away.

CHAPTER XLIX. THE HORSE GUARDS

I will not say that my reverse of fortune did not depress me; indeed, the first blow fell heavily; but that once past, a number of opposing motives rallied my courage and nerved my heart. My father, I knew, relied on me in this crisis to support his own strength. I had learned to care less for extravagant habits and expensive tastes, by living among those who accorded them little sympathy and less respect. Besides, if my changed career excluded me from the race of fashion, it opened the brilliant path of a soldier’s life before me; and now every hour seemed an age, until I should find myself among the gallant fellows who were winning their laurels in the battlefields of the Peninsula.

According to the duke’s appointment of the preceding evening I found myself, at ten o’clock punctually, awaiting my turn to be introduced, in the ante-chamber of the Horse Guards. The room was crowded with officers in full dress. Some old white-haired generals of division had been coming daily for years past to solicit commands, their fitness for which lay only in their own doting imaginations; some, broken by sickness and crippled with wounds, were seeking colonial appointments they never could live to reach; hale and stout men in the prime of life were there also, entreating exchanges which should accommodate their wives and daughters, who preferred Bath or Cheltenham to the banks of the Tagus or the snows of Canada. Among these, however, were many fine soldierlike fellows, whose only request was to be sent where hard knocks were going, careless of the climate and regardless of the cause. Another class were thinly sprinkled around – young officers of the staff, many of them delicate, effeminate-looking figures, herding scrupulously together, and never condescending, by word or look, to acknowledge their brethren about them. In this knot De Vere was conspicuous by the loud tone of his voice and the continued titter of his unmeaning laugh. I have already mentioned the consummate ease with which he could apparently forget all unpleasant recollections, and accost the man whom he should have blushed to meet. Now he exhibited this power in perfection; saluting me across the room with a familiar motion of his hand, he called out —

‘Ah, Hinton, you here, too? Sick of Ireland; I knew it would come to that. Looking for something near town?’

A cold negative, and a colder bow, was my only answer.

Nothing abashed by this – indeed, to all seeming, quite indifferent to it» he continued —

‘Bad style of thing, Dublin; couldn’t stand those con-founded talkers, with their old jokes from circuit. You were horribly bored, too; I saw it.’

‘I beg, my lord,’ said I, in a tone of seriousness, the best exchange I could assume for the deep annoyance I felt – ‘I beg that you will not include me in your opinions respecting Ireland; I opine we differ materially in our impressions on that country, and perhaps not without reason too. These latter words I spoke with marked emphasis, and fixing my eyes steadily on him.

‘Very possibly,’ lisped he, as coolly as before. ‘I left it without regret; you apparently ought to be there still! Ha, ha, ha! he has it there, I think.’

The blood mounted to my face and temples as I heard these words, and stepping close up beside him, I said slowly and distinctly —

‘I thought, sir, that one lesson might have taught you with whom these liberties were practicable.’

As I said thus much the door opened, and his grace the Duke of York appeared. Abashed at having so far forgotten where I was, I stood motionless and crimson for shame. Lord Dudley, on the contrary, bowed reverently to his Royal Highness, without the slightest evidence of discomposure or irritation, his easy smile curling his lip.

The duke turned from one to the other of us without speaking, his dark eyes piercing, as it were, into our very hearts. ‘Lord Dudley de Vere,’ said he at length, ‘I have signed your appointment. Mr. Hinton, I am sorry to find that the voice I have heard more than once within the last five minutes, in an angry tone, was yours. Take care, sir, that this forgetfulness does not grow upon you. The colonel of the Twenty-seventh is not the person to overlook it, I promise you.’

‘If your Royal Highness – ’

‘I must entreat you to spare me any explanations. You are gazetted to the Twenty-seventh. I hope you will hold yourself in readiness for immediate embarkation. Where’s the detachment, Sir Howard?’

‘At Chatham, your Royal Highness,’ replied an old officer behind the duke’s shoulder. At the same moment his grace passed through the room, conversing as he went with different persons about him.

As I turned away, I met Lord Dudley’s eyes. They were riveted on me with an expression of triumphant malice I had never seen in them before, and I hurried homeward with a heart crushed and wounded.

I have but one reason for the mention of this trivial incident. It is to show how often the studied courtesy, the well-practised deception, that the fashion of the world teaches, will prevail over the heartfelt, honest indignation which deep feeling evinces; and what a vast superiority the very affectation of temper confers, in the judgment of others who stand by the game of life and care nothing for the players at either side. Let no one suspect me of lauding the mockery of virtue in what I say here. I would merely impress on the young man who can feel for the deep sorrow and abasement I suffered the importance of the attainment of that self-command, of that restraint over any outbreak of passion, when the very semblance of it insures respect and admiration.

It is very difficult to witness with indifference the preference of those we have once loved for some other person; still more so, when that other chances to be one we dislike. The breach of affection seems then tinctured with a kind of betrayal; we call to mind how once we swayed the temper and ruled the thoughts of her who now has thrown off her allegiance; we feel, perhaps for the first time too, how forgotten are all our lessons, how dead is all our wonted influence; we remember when the least word, the slightest action, bent beneath our will; when our smile was happiness and our very sadness a reproof; and now we see ourselves unminded and neglected, and no more liberty to advise, no more power to control, than the merest stranger of the passing hour. What a wound to our self-love!

That my cousin Julia loved De Vere, O’Grady’s suspicions had already warned me; the little I had seen of her since my return strengthened the impression, while his confident manner and assured tone confirmed my worst fears. In my heart I knew how utterly unworthy he was of such a girl; but then, if he had already won her affections, my knowledge came too late. Besides, the changed circumstances of my own fortune, which must soon become known, would render my interference suspicious, and consequently of no value; and, after all, if I determined on such a course, what allegation could I bring against him which he could not explain away as the mere levity of the young officer associating among those he looked down upon and despised?

Such were some of my reflections as I slowly returned homewards from the Horse Guards. As I arrived, a travelling-carriage stood at the door; boxes, imperials, and cap-cases littered the hall and steps; servants were hurrying back and forward, and Mademoiselle Clémence, my mother’s maid, with a poodle under one arm and a macaw’s cage in the other, was adding to the confusion by directions in a composite language that would have astonished Babel itself.

‘What means all this?’ said I. ‘Is Lady Charlotte leaving town?’

‘Miladi va partir – ’

‘Her ladyship’s going to Hastings, sir,’ said the butler, interrupting. ‘Dr. T – has been here this morning and recommends an immediate change of air for her ladyship.’

‘Is Sir George in the house?’

‘No, sir, he’s just gone out with the doctor.’

Ah, thought I, this then is a concerted measure to induce my mother to leave town. ‘Is Lady Julia at home?’

‘Yes, sir, in the drawing-room.’

‘Whose horse is that with the groom?’ ‘Lord Dudley de Vere’s, sir; he’s upstairs.’ Already had I turned to go to the drawing-room, when I heard these words. Suddenly, a faint, half-sick feeling came over me, and I hastened upstairs to my own room, actually dreading to meet any one as I went. The blank future before me never seemed so cheerless as at that moment – separated, without a chance of ever meeting, from the only one I ever really loved; tortured by my doubts of her feeling for me (for even now what would I not have given to know she loved me!) my worldly prospects ruined; without a home; my cousin Julia, the only one who retained either an interest in me or seemed to care for me, about to give her hand to the man I hated and despised. ‘How soon, and I shall be alone in the world!’ thought I; and already the cold selfishness of isolation presented itself to my mind.

A gentle tap came to the door. I opened it; it was a message from Lady Charlotte, requesting to see me in her room. As I passed the door of the drawing-room I heard Lady Julia and Lord de Vere talking and laughing together. He was, as usual, ‘so amusing,’ as my mother’s letter called him – doubtless, relating my hasty and intemperate conduct at the Horse Guards. For an instant I stopped irresolute as to whether I should not break suddenly in, and disconcert his lordship’s practical coolness by a disclosure: my better reason prevented me, and I passed on. Lady Charlotte was seated in a deep arm-chair, inspecting the packing of various articles of toilette and jewelry which were going on around her, her cheek somewhat flushed from even this small excitement.

‘Ah, dearest John, how d’ye do? Find a chair somewhere, and sit down by me; you see what confusion we ‘re in. Dr. Y – found there was not an hour to spare; the heart he suspects to be sympathetically engaged – don’t put that Chantilly veil there, I shall never get at it – and he advises Hastings for the present. He’s coming with us, however – I’ll wear that ring, Clémence – and I must insist at his looking at you. You are very pale to-day, and dark under the eyes; have you any pain in the side?’

‘None whatever, my dear mother; I’m quite well.’

‘Pain is, however, a late symptom; my attack began with an – a sense of – it was rather – Has Bundal not sent back that bracelet? How very provoking! Could you call there, dear John? – that tiresome man never minds the servants – it’s just on your way to the club, or the Horse Guards, or somewhere.’

I could scarce help a smile, as I promised not to forget the commission.

‘And now, my dear, how did his grace receive you? You saw him this morning?’

‘My interview was quite satisfactory on the main point. I am appointed to the Twenty-seventh.’

‘Why not on the staff, dear John? You surely don’t mean to leave England! Having been abroad already – in Ireland I mean – it’s very hard to expect you to go so soon again. Lady Jane Colthurst’s son has never been farther from her than Knightsbridge; and I’m sure I don’t see why we are to be treated worse than she is.’

‘But my own wish – ’

‘Your own wish, my dear, could never be to give me uneasiness, which I assure you you did very considerably while in Ireland. The horrid people you made acquaintance with – my health, I’m certain, could never sustain a repetition of the shock I experienced then.’

My mother leaned back and closed her eyes, as if some very dreadful circumstance was passing across her memory; and I, half ashamed of the position to which she would condemn me, was silent.

‘There, that aigrette will do very well there, I’m sure. I don’t know why you are putting in all these things; I shall never want them again, in all likelihood.’

The depressed tone in which these words were spoken did not affect me much; for I knew well, from long habit, how my mother loved to dwell on the possibility of that event, the bare suggestion of which, from another, she couldn’t have endured.

Just at this moment Julia entered in her travelling dress, a shawl thrown negligently across her shoulders.

‘I hope I have not delayed you. John, are we to have your company too?’

‘No, my dear,’ said my mother languidly, ‘he’s going to leave us. Some foolish notion of active service – ’

‘Indeed!’ said Julia, not waiting for the conclusion of the speech – ‘indeed!’ She drew near me, and as she did so her colour became heightened, and her dark eyes grew darker and more meaning. ‘You never told me this!’

‘I only knew it about an hour ago myself,’ replied I coolly; ‘and when I was about to communicate my news to you I found you were engaged with a visitor – Lord de Vere, I think.’

‘Ah, yes, very true; he was here,’ she said quickly; and then perceiving that my eyes were fixed upon her, she turned her head hastily, and in evident confusion.

‘Dear me, is it so late?’ said my mother with a sigh. ‘I have some calls to make yet. Don’t you think, John, you could take them off my hands? It’s only to drop a card at Lady Blair’s; and you could ask if Caroline ‘s better – though, poor thing, she can’t be, of course; Dr. Y – says her malady is exactly my own. And then if you are passing Long’s, tell Sir Charles that our whist-party is put off – perhaps Grammont has told him already. You may mention to Saunders that I shall not want the horses till I return; and say I detest greys, they are so like city people’s equipages; and wait an instant’ – here her ladyship took a small ivory memorandum tablet from the table, and began reading from it a list of commissions, some of them most ludicrously absurd. In the midst of the catalogue my father entered hastily with his watch in his hand.

‘You’ll be dreadfully late on the road, Charlotte; and you forget Y – must be back here early to-morrow.’

‘So I had forgotten it,’ said she with some animation; ‘but we’re quite ready now. Clémence has done everything, I think. Come, John, give me your arm, my dear: Julia always takes this side. Are you certain it won’t rain, Sir George?’

‘I really cannot be positive,’ said my father, smiling.

‘I’m sure there’s thunder in the air,’ rejoined my mother; ‘my nerves would never bear a storm.’

Some dreadful catastrophe in the West Indies, where an earthquake had swallowed up a whole population, occurred to her memory at the instant, and the possibility of something similar occurring between Seven Oaks and Tunbridge seemed to engross her entire attention. By this time we reached the hall, where the servants, drawn up in double file, stood in respectful silence. My mother’s eyes were, however, directed upon a figure which occupied the place next the door, and whose costume certainly was strangely at variance with the accurate liveries about him. An old white greatcoat with some twenty capes reaching nearly to the ground (for the garment had been originally destined for a much larger person), a glazed hat fastened down with a handkerchief passed over it and tied under the chin, and a black-thorn stick with a little bundle at the end of it were his most remarkable equipments.

‘What is it? What can it be doing there?’ said my mother, in a Siddons tone of voice.

‘What is it? Corny Delany, no less,’ croaked out the little man in the crankiest tone of his harsh voice. ‘It’s what remains of me, at laste!’

‘Oh, yes,’ said Julia, bursting into a laugh, ‘Corny’s coming as my bodyguard. He’ll sit in the rumble with Thomas.’

‘What a shocking figure it is!’ said my mother, surveying him through her glass.

‘Time doesn’t improve either of us,’ said Corny, with the grin of a demon. Happily the observation was only heard by myself. ‘Is it in silk stockings I’d be trapesing about the roads all night, with the rheumatiz in the small of my back! Ugh! the Haythina!’

My mother was at length seated in the carriage, with Julia beside her – the hundred and one petty annoyances to make travelling uncomfortable, by way of rendering it supportable, around her; Corny had mounted to his place beside Thomas, who regarded him with a look of as profound contempt as a sleek, well-fed pointer would confer upon some mangy mongrel of the roadside; a hurried good-bye from my mother, a quick, short glance from Julia, a whisper lost in the crash of the wheels – and they were gone.