Kitabı oku: «No Madmen»

Developmental Editing Vyacheslav Komkov

Copy Editing Colm Farren

© Sunday Sarafan, 2024

ISBN 978-5-0064-5584-9

Создано в интеллектуальной издательской системе Ridero

No Madmen

Bunny stares intently into my eyes, as if trying to see my thoughts, and remains silent. Well, I’ll try to relax under that gaze. The end of the work day. The clock behind the patient has already ticked off six minutes. Has he blinked in all this time? Alright, let’s keep silent a bit longer.

It seems Bunny’s shoulders are wider than an armchair. Is he putting something under his jacket? A huge man. How he resisted saying his name the first time he came. Protested loudly: I’m just a person… What’s with all the questions? I only came to discuss something. At the end of the session, he came up with the nickname «Bunny the Killer». I then suggested that he saw himself as an innocent being, pushed by others into committing violence. This idea touched Bunny, and he obediently came to see me every week for the following year.

Later, it turned out that he had made up a funny nickname to prevent me from denouncing him, but Bunny, of course, made a mistake. I found out his name from his payments, and thanks to my connections in psychiatry, I know how to have someone sent to a mental institution. I doubt he’ll forgive me for this. As Bunny walked into my office, he proudly declared that today would be our final session. I accepted his decision in silence.

Now, Bunny seems to be practicing telepathy, staring so intently that it’s as if he might uncover my thoughts at any moment. So, go ahead, tell me – how was your time on the psychiatric ward? You’ve only just come out.

The patient’s gaze has changed. I see a glint. Tears? It doesn’t seem so.

Bunny the Killer leans forward and whispers:

– To be honest, Doc, at first I was angry with you for sending me to the asylum, but then… do you know what I realized?

It seems Bunny is enjoying making me wait. He leans back a little, makes himself more at ease in his chair, and says daringly:

– There are no insane people.

The room fills with a mysterious feeling due to his confident voice. An almost forgotten, childish feeling rises within me – an exploratory spirit, hungry for the unknown and the transcendent. What is this? A rebellion against the system? Or perhaps he sees me as insane?

Bunny continues, taking out a handmade crown of thorns from his bag:

– There are strange people there, I borrowed this from one of them, but there are no insane people.

Bunny puts the crown on his head, and the mysterious feeling fades away. Megalomania is back in full swing. Now he’s not even ashamed of it. Could this be a sign of progress? A sign of trust? Can I dig a little deeper? I ask, almost tenderly:

– Does the crown symbolize all your suffering in this therapy?

Bunny the Killer laughs for a few seconds, then suddenly becomes serious.

– Yes, Doc. Last time you convinced me that I should express my negative feelings for therapeutic purposes. I could have held back then, but you were so pro-movement in therapy. Why didn’t you like the result? I pushed a little too hard as a joke, and the orderlies were already waiting for me on the way out. So today, I am the lamb.

– Who am I then? Pontius Pilate?

– Exactly. I completely forgot!

Recalling something, Bunny takes a package out of his bag, awkwardly jumps up from the chair, and hands it to me.

– This is a black raven. More your measure than Ponitus Pilate.

I naively thank Bunny, and then realize that I’m holding the head of a dead bird. There’s not a lot of blood in the bag, but it’s enough to make me start feeling sick. To avoid losing my composure, I quickly place the bird’s head on the coffee table. Bunny watches my every move with delight. I need to say something; he’s waiting for my reaction.