Kitabı oku: «Talking About Sex...», sayfa 2

2

JESS HADN’T SEEN KATIE in the flesh in years…thirteen, to be exact. But he’d passed her picture hundreds of times while driving around town. A giant version of her gazed down from at least three billboards that he knew of. He’d had a few wet dreams involving Billboard Katie, and he probably wasn’t the only guy.

Billboard Katie reclined on a red velvet couch while wearing tight black pants and a black blouse with a plunging neckline. Her blond hair hung from a center part and framed her face, which wore an expression that promised incredible sex. If she’d looked at him like that on prom night, he wouldn’t have been able to resist her, but at eighteen she hadn’t had the sophistication to pull it off.

Real-life Katie wore a sedate gray pantsuit and her hair in some girly arrangement on top of her head. There wasn’t a hint of sexiness in her expression. Alarm would be more like it. Good. She should be alarmed.

A few minutes ago she’d sounded so carefree that he’d almost lost the urge to create a potentially ugly scene. A window at the front of the building had been left open, and as he’d approached, he’d recognized Katie’s voice as she’d made plans to go out for margaritas tomorrow night.

Then his name had come up and the volume of the conversation had dropped considerably. Knowing she was discussing him with the receptionist had riled him up all over again.

But now that the moment was at hand, finding the right words was more difficult than he’d expected. He should have anticipated that. Making speeches had never been his long suit. Katie, on the other hand, had always been extremely verbal—she’d been senior class president and captain of the debate team.

But now the opening sentence had to be his. “We—” He stopped to clear his throat, irritated with himself for having to do that. “We need to talk.”

“So talk,” said a spiky-haired woman sitting behind the receptionist’s desk. “Don’t mind me.”

Jess had completely forgotten someone else was there until she’d spoken. Apparently Katie still affected him to the point that he blocked out everything but her. That was an unwelcome discovery. He wanted to keep the upper hand in this interaction, and going gaga over Katie wouldn’t help.

Katie glanced at the receptionist. “Ava, this is Jess Harkins, an old friend from high school. Jess, this is Ava Dinsmore, our intern from Pima College.”

“Nice meeting you,” Jess said.

“Same here.” Ava studied him with interest.

“I think I left some files in the conference room,” Katie said to Ava. “Would you check and see if they’re there?”

“I’d be glad to, but I’d better watch the phones. We always get a bunch of calls for Jared’s show on Friday nights.”

“Good point. Then I’ll go check. Jess, why don’t you come on back with me so we can discuss this on the way?”

“It won’t take long.” Jess looked into Katie’s eyes and was rocketed back thirteen years.

She’d been his first love, and he’d had so little to give her back then. He and his mom had moved their meager belongings from Globe to Tucson his senior year in high school. He’d been the new kid, the one with no money and big dreams, a quiet guy who’d been fascinated with Katie’s gift of gab and her blond good looks. He’d envied her sense of belonging.

When she’d taken an interest in him, he’d been thrilled. They’d been a good combo because she’d done enough talking for both of them. To compensate for not saying much, he’d written her poems.

One he happened to remember now had compared her eyes to every blue thing he could think of, including his favorite stonewashed denims. God, he’d been pathetic. And a lousy poet. But her eyes still had the power to make him lose his train of thought.

“Just come with me,” she said. “I need to take those files home tonight and we can talk on the way, kill two birds with one stone.”

“That’s not necessary. I just—”

“I think it is.” She turned and started toward a hallway.

He wasn’t about to deliver his ultimatum to her back, so he had no choice but to follow her like an obedient lapdog. This was not going the way he’d scripted it in his head. He was forced to pass the receptionist, who took no pains to disguise her curiosity.

“I think she still likes you,” Ava said in an undertone.

He stared at her. Surely she didn’t know that he and Katie…surely not.

Ava met his stare and shrugged.

Then again, no telling what Katie had revealed and to whom. But if she’d made her life an open book, she wouldn’t be trying to keep this discussion private. He was confused, not a good state of mind for accomplishing his mission.

Katie paused at an open door and glanced back at him. “Jess?”

Instinct told him not to go in there. His plan had been simple—confront her at work and threaten legal action if she didn’t stop her attacks on his project and on him. Especially on him. But now that he was here, his threat seemed silly and belligerent. Defensive. As if he’d taken the sexual-inadequacy thing seriously.

He should have thought of how it would look, him storming over here to demand better treatment. Instead he should have ignored the whole business. But he was into it now, and leaving without saying anything would make him seem even more idiotic. A firm stand was called for.

He walked toward the door Katie held open. She maintained her position, which forced him to walk past her into the room. Anyone would think she’d initiated this meeting with the way she’d taken charge. He needed to reverse the dynamics, but one whiff of her perfume—the same lemony scent she’d worn in high school—and his brain took a major hit.

Instead of planning his line of attack, he was wondering if she was seeing anyone. She wasn’t wearing a ring—that much he’d noticed right away, though he shouldn’t have taken the time to notice. Her comments on the air made it clear she considered him pond scum.

Focus, Harkins. He was good at that. Harkins Construction, built from scratch in only seven years, was a testament to his powers of concentration and his ability to bring others around to his point of view. Although he wasn’t much of a talker, he’d somehow convinced loan officers to take a chance on him when he’d had no collateral except his will to succeed.

Maybe that’s where he’d gone wrong. He’d barreled over here to issue demands instead of trying persuasion first. His temper had taken control. Katie had always had the power to arouse strong emotions in him—anger, joy, passion. Reasonable discussion wasn’t normal with them, but that insight had arrived about thirty minutes late.

The conference room had a couple of windows covered with wood-toned plantation shutters, and a desert mural decorated one wall. The large oak table in the middle looked as if it had come from a Spanish hacienda. He could imagine how much Katie enjoyed working in this old adobe house. She’d always loved anything Southwestern.

When the door closed, he turned around. He and Katie were alone for the first time since the night of the senior prom. And just like that night, he couldn’t figure out what to say to her.

AS THEY STOOD FACING EACH other, close enough that they could reach out and hold hands if they chose to, Katie’s heart hammered like a set of bongos. She’d always been fascinated by Jess’s mouth. His full bottom lip had been so much fun to nibble on, and when he’d chosen to use that mouth on her breasts, she’d experienced a little bit of heaven.

She looked away from that tempting mouth. Now was not the time to be thinking of how much she’d loved making out with him. Being alone in the backseat of a car with Jess used to make her forget where they were and what time it was. She’d blown her curfew more than once because of that.

She needed to take a deep breath, but that might telegraph her nervousness, so she made do with the small amount of air in her lungs. As a result, her voice sounded more breathy than usual. “I take it you’re upset about my comments on the air recently,” she said.

“Yeah, especially tonight’s comments. You’re making this personal and I don’t like it.”

Although she met his gaze, she was trembling and she didn’t want him to notice. She gripped the back of a mission-style chair to steady herself. “Too bad. I call ’em like I see ’em.”

“I’m not compensating for anything, Katie.”

“That’s not the way the experts see it.”

He sighed. “Please just tell me why you’re doing this.”

That sigh almost defeated her. When they’d dated, that kind of heartfelt sigh had made her want to gather him into her arms and make everything better. At times Jess had seemed to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders, and she’d wanted to soothe away his cares.

But sigh or no sigh, he was still the man involved in destroying her legacy. “I want to save this beautiful old adobe building from the wrecking ball,” she said.

“It seems like more than that.” He paused and cleared his throat. “I think you’re still upset with me about prom night.”

“Of course I’m not,” she lied. “That was ages ago.” And she could still remember the thrill of parking with Jess. Her body remembered, too.

His eyes narrowed. “But your attack tonight was against me, not the construction project. Don’t tell me you honestly believe I’m building a high-rise because I have sexual hang-ups?”

She felt backed into a corner and said the first thing that occurred to her. “It’s always possible, isn’t it? Not that I care anymore, but I have personal knowledge that you won’t finish what you start.”

He took a step closer. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I most certainly do.” She refused to retreat and let him see that he was intimidating her.

With the kind of sexuality Jess projected, she didn’t really believe he was compensating for anything by constructing that building. To be completely honest, it was very possible she’d unconsciously hoped that tweaking his male ego would bring exactly this result—Jess to her doorstep.

He moved even closer and his voice deepened. “Look, contrary to what you might think, contrary to what happened thirteen years ago, I don’t have a problem with sex.”

“Couldn’t prove it by me.” She could barely breathe, but what little inhaling she was able to do brought with it a heady combo of spicy aftershave and fresh soap. Her nose remembered how good he used to smell.

“What exactly do you want from me, Katie?”

She wanted him to kiss her, which was really stupid. What would that accomplish? “I want you to stop construction.”

“That’s not going to happen and you know it. You and VOR lost the fight. The building’s going up, and taunting me isn’t going to change a thing.”

“Public opinion can be a powerful force. I’m working to sway it in my direction.”

“Good luck. I plan to erect that building.”

Gazing up at him, she remembered how silky his brown hair used to feel when she’d run her fingers through it. She had to white-knuckle the chair to keep from reaching for him. “Can you hear yourself? You plan to erect that building. If that isn’t sexual symbolism, I don’t know what is.”

“It’s only a building.” Heat flashed in his eyes. “This is sex.” He grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her. Hard. Then he let go so fast she staggered.

She vibrated from that kiss like a plucked guitar string. Unable to form words—an unusual state for her—she stared at him and struggled to breathe. They simply gazed at each other for a long moment.

“Damn it, Katie.” His voice was soft as a caress.

She matched his tone. “Damn you, Jess.”

“You used to drive me crazy.”

She gulped. “But not…crazy enough.”

He studied her in silence for several seconds. “So this is about prom night.”

She couldn’t very well deny it now, not when all she wanted was another kiss. More than a kiss. She wasn’t over him, not by a long shot.

“Katie, it wasn’t the place. And now that I think about it, neither is this.” He backed away and fumbled for the doorknob.

She leaned against the table for support. “You’re leaving?”

“Damn it, we’re in the KRZE conference room.”

“And the door has a lock.”

He hesitated, as if thinking that over. Then he shook his head. “But I’d like to see you again. I think—”

“What, so you can set me up and knock me down? Not bloody likely!”

He gazed at her mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for that kiss to happen.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll never let it happen again.” She folded her arms and hugged herself to stop the quivering. “I should have known nothing’s changed.”

“Of course it has. Everything’s changed.”

“Not when it comes to you and me. For some fiendish reason, you love to tease me with possibilities and then leave.”

“We were kids then! It’s different now.”

“Is it?”

He gazed at her for a long moment. “Yeah, it’s different. And I’ll find a way to prove it to you.” He turned and opened the door, then walked out and closed it softly behind him.

Shaken, Katie stared at the carvings on the heavy door without seeing them. Dear God, if Jess had been willing, she would have kissed him again. She might have done more than kiss him. Talk about stupidity squared.

This room wasn’t soundproof, and Ava was down the hall, curious as hell. She might have heard something, although probably not. The door was heavy and the walls of this old building were thick. But if Katie and Jess had gotten carried away, Ava would have known.

Katie had been ready to commit professional suicide, and only Jess’s refusal to continue had saved her. Edgecomb would cancel her show in a Tucson minute if he ever found out something like that had gone on in his conference room, especially involving the owner of Harkins Construction. And he’d be justified.

So Jess had made the right call, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t a rat. He should have tried to follow through and let her be the one to stop them. Which she might not have done, but that was beside the point. She was finished with him.

He might be the guy who could start her engine with only a feather touch. He might be more gorgeous now than he had been as a teenager—his body had filled out and his voice had a deeper, sexier timbre that gave her goose bumps.

But none of that mattered because he couldn’t be counted on to need her beyond reason, the way her grandfather had needed her grandmother. Men were supposed to be victims of their hormones, not ruled by logic. Why did Jess have to be the exception?

Yep, she was through with him. And as for her comments on the air, they would only get more scathing. She’d talk Edgecomb out of worrying about the negotiations. And as for Jess, he could just deal with it.

JESS KNEW HE HAD TO TAKE bold action if he expected to square things with Katie. After that interlude in the conference room, he wanted things to be more than square. He wanted to finish—finally—what they’d started so many times before. She wasn’t going to make that easy for him, though.

Tonight’s episode told him she’d never forgiven him for refusing to have sex with her on prom night. She couldn’t know how much that refusal had cost him, was still costing him. Countless times he’d cursed himself for being so damned noble. And he’d never found a woman to equal Katie.

But he hadn’t wanted to cheapen their first real lovemaking by doing it in the back of a car. His mother had told him he’d been conceived that way. She didn’t regret having him, but she thought sex should be conducted in better surroundings. He’d never forgotten that.

Make-out sessions with Katie were okay because they’d only been fooling around, indulging in heavy petting. But when she’d asked him to take her virginity, that was serious stuff. He’d wanted it to be special, and back then he hadn’t had the resources to make it special.

On top of being broke, he’d underestimated the importance she’d place on his refusal. He hadn’t expected her to take it as a rejection, but obviously her expectations of prom night had been huge. He’d let her down.

Apparently he’d done it again tonight by kissing her and leaving. But damn it, he wasn’t about to take that kind of chance with either of their reputations. It was bad enough that he’d lost control and kissed her in the first place.

If things had progressed and word had gotten out, he might have weathered it. But the double standard was still around, and she might never have recovered her status in the community if anyone discovered she’d had a hot rendevous in the KRZE conference room.

He hadn’t meant to tick her off, but when passion of the Katie kind gripped him, he didn’t dare spend time discussing why he was going to leave. He had to get out of the situation before his control snapped and he actually did something dumb.

Katie hadn’t understood that thirteen years ago, and she hadn’t understood it tonight either. He’d have to pull out all the stops to convince her to give him another shot.

He planned to start by breaking into her apartment tomorrow night.

3

BY SIX O’CLOCK ON SATURDAY NIGHT, the temperature on the patio of Katie’s favorite Mexican restaurant hovered around seventy-five degrees—perfect for sipping frozen margaritas. In the desert she might not have colorful autumn leaves to enjoy, but she had warm October nights and lime-flavored tequila.

Ava sat at a table by the fountain. For the occasion she’d dressed in a black scoop-neck shirt, long black skirt and combat boots.

“Good call, getting this table.” Katie sat across from Ava. “This is my favorite spot, where you can hear the water splash.”

“Splashing water produces negative ions,” Ava said. “Negative ions elevate your mood.”

“I could use that.” Katie signaled a waiter. “Plus a margarita.”

Ava nodded. “I could tell you were bummed when you left last night.”

“Yeah, sorry I was so abrupt.”

“It’s okay. I understand.”

“It was a tough situation. I—” Katie paused as the waiter approached.

The waiter did a double take. “Aren’t you Crazy Katie?”

“Yes.” Katie was used to being recognized once in a while, but it had happened a lot today. Everybody wanted to comment on her Friday night show, which had helped distract her from thinking about Jess.

“My friends and I think that big building is stupid, too.” He winked. “We’re not the kind of guys who have to prove ourselves, if you know what I mean.”

“Glad to hear it. The more support I can round up, the better.”

“I know a lot of people are behind you,” the waiter said. “Anyway, I wanted to let you know. So what will you ladies have to drink tonight?”

“Two margaritas,” Katie said. “And Ava, it’s my treat.”

“Aw, you don’t have to do that,” Ava said. “I invited myself.”

“And you’re also putting yourself through school. I remember what it’s like to be twenty-two and broke. When you’re pulling in the big bucks you can buy me a drink, okay?”

“It’s a deal.” Ava looked very happy at the prospect of an extended friendship with Katie. After the waiter left, she leaned closer. “Do you get recognized a lot?”

“Not a lot, but it happens. Today more people than usual have stopped me to say something about the show, which is good. I need ammunition for Edgecomb.”

“Yeah, you do. And what’s the situation with your ex? Is he still a turd?”

“Yep.” Katie had figured the subject of Jess would come up, so she was prepared. “He didn’t react well to Dr. Astorbrooke’s theories, to say the least.”

“Most guys wouldn’t.”

“What about our waiter? He seemed to agree with me.”

“He’s young. He’s antiestablishment.”

“Jared was fine with it.”

Ava waved her hand. “Jared’s a mensch. You couldn’t ruffle his feathers if you hit him with a fire hose. But your guy—”

“Not my guy,” Katie said.

“A figure of speech. Anyway, you’re hitting this Harkins dude right where he lives. And he doesn’t strike me as being that easygoing.”

“He’s pretty intense.” And girl, can he kiss.

“I know looks aren’t everything, but he’s kind of cute in a Jude Law sort of way.”

“I suppose.” Jess was more than cute. He had a heartthrob quality that made her go all gooey inside. She’d had that reaction the minute she’d caught a glimpse of him in her senior English class and she’d been battling that same reaction ever since he’d kissed her nineteen hours and forty-six minutes ago. Not that she was counting.

Mooning about Jess had affected almost half of her weekend, but she was determined it wouldn’t affect the second half. Having drinks with Cheryl and Ava was a good start. And speaking of Cheryl, she arrived at that moment, all smiles and curly red hair.

“Hey, guys!” Cheryl snagged a chair and settled her curvy little body into it. “Sorry I’m late. I played tennis this afternoon with this yummy-licious new guy from the law firm and I lost track of the time.” She barreled on without taking a breath. “I would have called but my cell’s acting weird. I need to trade it in for a new one, but I hate going through that, you know? New phone, new options, more buttons to figure out. So, I’m thinkin’—” She paused and looked at Katie. “What’s so funny?”

“You.” Katie was so glad she’d agreed to spend happy hour with Cheryl. Nobody could stay depressed with Cheryl around. “You have more energy than a four-month-old Chihuahua. By the way, this is Ava, the person you always get when you call the station.”

“Hi, Ava! It’s good to meet you at last! As for the Chihuahua thing, please don’t tell me I look like one.” Cheryl fluffed her short hair. “A Lhasa Apso’s okay. You can compare me to a Lhasa Apso any old day, but a Chihuahua looks so sort of naked, you know? Which is cute in its own way, but I like to think that I have more—oh, here come your drinks.” She batted her eyelashes at the waiter. “I’ll have one exactly like that, please. Are you a student at the U of A? I ask because lots of the students wait tables here.”

As Cheryl turned to launch into an animated discussion with the waiter, Ava leaned across the table toward Katie. “Is this normal?”

“Completely normal.”

“I was afraid she was on something.”

“No, she’s just being Cheryl. Her courtroom rep is that she wins cases by talking the jury to death.”

Cheryl swung back to them. “You’re explaining me to Ava, aren’t you? Ava, you might as well get used to my motormouth. I’ve been this way ever since I was fourteen months old and I’m not likely to change now. Katie and I recognized each other as soul mates in first grade and we’ve been involved in a conversational marathon ever since.”

“Oh, you won that race a long time ago,” Katie said.

“Hey, you hold your own, DJ girl. The point is, Ava, that Katie’s used to me, but you’re not. If you have something you need to say, just holler shut up, Cheryl and I’ll do my best.”

Katie laughed. “I just want to know if you passed up drinks and dinner with the yummy-licious lawyer so you could meet us for happy hour.”

“I did, but that’s a good thing. I liked being able to tell him I had other plans. It’s good to have them thinking you have a full social schedule, you know? But in any case, I wouldn’t have canceled this to go out with him, because I think that’s just wrong. Men come and go but girlfriends are forever. Am I right?”

Both Katie and Ava nodded.

“Of course I’m right.” She didn’t break stride as her margarita arrived. “Listen, Katie, that show last night was dynamite. Thrusting Skyward. I loved it. What a zinger. I’m going to start field-testing the guys I date to find out how they feel about high-rise buildings. What a great litmus test. I hope that Je—I mean someone from Harkins Construction caught that program. I mean, the whole crew at that job site should be required to listen to that program. They think they’re so macho with their hard hats and their tool belts, but every last man-Jack of them needs to reevaluate their—”

“Cheryl, it’s okay.” Katie didn’t want Cheryl working herself into a lather trying to cover up her little slip. “Ava knows about Jess. In fact, he came to the station after the program last night.”

Cheryl stared at her. “He did? What did he say? What did you say? What did he look like? Is he still hot? Is he married? Was he—”

“Cheryl, shut up.” Katie grinned at her friend.

“Right. I’ll drink my margarita. Start talking. Tell me everything.”

Katie wasn’t about to do that, but she sketched in the outline of the visit without supplying the detail about the kiss. She said they’d agreed to disagree and parted ways. His final vow that things were different and he’d prove it to her didn’t make the edited version she gave Cheryl and Ava.

Cheryl obviously knew she was holding back. Katie could see it in the tiny smile that Cheryl hid behind the rim of her margarita glass. And when Ava left at seven because she’d promised to catch a movie with her usual crowd, Cheryl dropped all pretense of believing Katie’s story.

“First we’re going to order dinner and another margarita,” she said. “And then you’re going to tell me what really happened.”

“I told you what happened!”

“Yeah, right. First we order, then you spill.” Cheryl motioned the waiter over and they each chose a taco salad to go with the second margarita.

“Okay, you can begin anytime,” Cheryl said after the waiter left. For once she didn’t elaborate on that thought or spin off onto a million other somewhat related topics. Instead she sat looking at Katie with that same tiny smile, waiting.

They’d been friends for a long time, and Katie knew that Cheryl would get the truth eventually. She always did. Most of the time she talked a blue streak, which was her natural state, but once in a while, like now, she could create a silence so welcoming, so in need of being filled, that a person felt obliged to confess all. That tactic had also served Cheryl well in the courtroom.

“I’m…” Katie drained her margarita glass and set it down on the glass table with a solid click. Between Cheryl’s open invitation to tell all and the tequila fogging her brain, Katie couldn’t hold her tongue. “I’m still into him, Cher.”

“I know.”

Katie sighed. “I figured you would. So when he showed up, I was all quivery, like I used to get in high school. I didn’t want Ava to hear what we said, so I brought him into the conference room and closed the door.” The memory of that got her hot all over again.

“Who made the first move?”

“He did. He…kissed me.” She tried to breathe normally, but telling Cheryl made her relive the moment when his lips had crushed hers, and all the powerful emotions created by that contact came rushing back.

“I take it you didn’t run screaming out of the room. No, you don’t have to tell me how you responded. I can see it in your eyes.”

Katie groaned and covered her face with both hands. “I’m sure he could see it, too.” She lifted her head and looked at Cheryl. “But he did the same damned thing as prom night! Got me going and then walked out the door, saying it wasn’t the place!”

“Well, it wasn’t! You could get fired for a stunt like that!”

“I know, but I wish I’d been the one to call a halt instead of him. I hate that I want him more. It’s humiliating.”

Cheryl fingered the stem of her margarita goblet. “If you should decide to give it another try, I’ll bet you could turn the tables on him. You’re not some shy little virgin now, are you? You have some experience and you—”

“You make it sound like I know all about sex. I don’t. I do research for the show, but that doesn’t mean I have a ton of practical knowledge. It’s not like I’ve tried all those Kama Sutra tips, you know.”

“I said some, not a ton. We’ve both had some, and I like to think we have a few tricks up our sleeve that can turn the average man into a groveling fool willing to do anything to keep us happy. You need to take the offensive with Jess if you want to regain some control. When are you going to see him again?”

“I’m not!” Katie thought the conversation was getting way out of hand. “He’s too hot to handle, Cher. I lose my head when I’m with him. And besides, he’s putting up this hideous building next to the station. How can I get involved under those circumstances? I’m putting him completely out of my mind.”

“If you say so.” Cheryl held Katie’s gaze. “But I wonder how you’re going to do that. With that building going up, he’ll be in your face and on your mind for the next few months. You haven’t gotten over him in thirteen years, so what makes you think you can get over him now?”

“I just will, that’s all.”

“I have a suggestion, but it’s only a suggestion, mind you. Don’t act on it unless it makes sense. But it seems to me that a better course of action would be to make some moves on this guy—on your terms. Get into bad-girl mode and tease him until you have him eating out of the palm of your hand.”

“I don’t want to—”

“For one thing, it would make you feel a whole lot better about past events,” Cheryl said, pushing on, “and for another, if you end up having to tolerate that building next door, at least you’ll have some compensation for the pain. I think it sounds like a fun project, personally. Jess is easy on the eye, and if you could pin him down, he might be one hell of a lover. That intensity of his tells me that he could give a woman—”

“Shut up, Cheryl.” Katie hadn’t interrupted because she had something to say. She had nothing to say. But the longer Cheryl talked, the more Katie wondered if she could pull off such an outrageous maneuver. And that was dangerous thinking.

JESS GOT KATIE’S ADDRESS from her mother, who was thrilled to hear from him and apologetic about the things her daughter was saying about his building. Jess told her not to worry about it, that he and Katie were in the process of working things out. Then he proceeded to Katie’s apartment near the university.