Kitabı oku: «Royal Families Vs. Historicals»
About the Authors
REBECCA WINTERS lives in Salt Lake City, Utah. With canyons and high alpine meadows full of wildflowers, she never runs out of places to explore. They, plus her favourite vacation spots in Europe, often end up as backgrounds for her romance novels, because writing is her passion, along with her family and church.
Rebecca loves to hear from readers. If you wish to email her, please visit her website at cleanromances.com
CARA COLTER shares her life in beautiful British Columbia, Canada, with her husband, nine horses and one small Pomeranian with a large attitude. She loves to hear from readers, and you can learn more about her and contact her through Facebook.
JESSICA HART was born in West Africa, and has suffered from itchy feet ever since—travelling and working around the world in a wide variety of interesting but very lowly jobs, all of which have provided inspiration to draw from when it comes to the settings and plots of her stories. Now she lives a rather more settled existence in York, where she has been able to pursue her interest in history, although she still yearns sometimes for wider horizons. If you’d like to know more about Jessica, visit her website at www.jessicahart.co.uk.
MAISEY YATES is a USA Today Bestselling author of more than thirty romance novels. She has a coffee habit she has no interest in kicking, and a slight Pinterest addiction. She lives with her husband and children in the Pacific Northwest. When Maisey isn’t writing she can be found singing in the grocery store, shopping for shoes online, and probably not doing dishes. Check out her website, www.maiseyyates.com.
USA TODAY bestselling and RITA® Award-nominated author CAITLIN CREWS loves writing romance. She teaches her favourite romance novels in creative writing classes at places like UCLA Extension’s prestigious Writers’ Program, where she finally gets to utilize the MA and PhD in English literature she received from the University of York in England. She currently lives in California with her very own hero and too many pets. Visit her at www.caitlincrews.com.
Canadian DANI COLLINS knew in high school that she wanted to write romance for a living. Twenty-five years later, after marrying her high school sweetheart, having two kids with him, working at several generic office jobs and submitting countless manuscripts, she got ‘The Call’. Her first Mills & Boon novel won the Reviewers’ Choice Award for Best First in Series from RT Book Reviews. She now works in her own office, writing romance.
CAROL MARINELLI recently filled in a form where she was asked for her job title and was thrilled, after all these years, to be able to put down her answer as ‘writer’. Then it asked what Carol did for relaxation and, after chewing her pen for a moment, Carol put down the truth – ‘writing’. The third question asked, ‘What are your hobbies?’ Well, not wanting to look obsessed or, worse still, boring, she crossed the fingers on her free hand and answered ‘swimming and tennis’. But, given that the chlorine in the pool does terrible things to her highlights, I’m sure you can guess the real answer.
Bestselling author MICHELLE CELMER lives in south-eastern Michigan with her husband, their three children, two dogs and two cats. When she’s not writing or busy being a mum, you can find her in the garden or curled up with a romance novel. Michelle loves to hear from readers. Visit her Web site, www.michellecelmer.com, or write her at P.O. Box 300, Clawson, MI 48017.
BRENDA HARLEN grew up in a small town surrounded by books and imaginary friends. Although she always dreamed of being a writer, she chose to follow a more traditional career path first. After two years of practicing as an attorney (including an appearance in front of the Supreme Court of Canada), she gave up her “real” job to be a mum and to try her hand at writing books.
Brenda lives in southern Ontario with her real-life husband/hero, two heroes-in-training and two neurotic dogs. She is still surrounded by books (too many books, according to her children) and imaginary friends, but she also enjoys communicating with “real” people.
NINA MILNE has always dreamed of writing for Mills & Boon—ever since she played libraries with her mother’s stacks of Mills & Boon romances as a child. On her way to this dream Nina acquired an English degree, a hero of her own, three gorgeous children and—somehow!—an accountancy qualification. She lives in Brighton and has filled her house with stacks of books—her very own real library.
SUSAN MEIER is an author of over fifty books for Mills & Boon. The Tycoon’s Secret Daughter was a Romance Writers of America RITA®Award finalist, and Nanny for the Millionaire’s Twins won the Book Buyer’s Best award and was a finalist in the National Reader’s Choice awards. She is married and has three children. One of eleven children, she loves to write about the complexity of families and totally believes in the power of love.
CAT SCHIELD has been reading and writing romance since high school. Although she graduated from college with a BA in business, her idea of a perfect career was writing books for Mills & Boon. And now, after winning the Romance Writers of America 2010 Golden Heart® Award for Best Contemporary Series Romance, that dream has come true. Cat lives in Minnesota with her daughter, Emily, and their Burmese cat. When she’s not writing sexy, romantic stories for Mills & Boon Desire, she can be found sailing with friends on the St. Croix River, or in more exotic locales, like the Caribbean and Europe. She loves to hear from readers. Find her at catschield.com. Follow her on Twitter, @catschield
DANA MARTON is the author of more than a dozen fastpaced, action-adventure romantic suspense novels and a winner of the Daphne du Maurier Award of Excellence. She loves writing books of international intrigue, filled with dangerous plots that try her tough-as-nails heroes and the special women they fall in love with. Her books have been published in seven languages in eleven countries around the world. To find more information on her books, please visit www.danamarton.com. She loves to hear from her readers and can be reached via e-mail at DanaMarton@DanaMarton.com.
USA TODAY bestselling author CATHERINE MANN lives on a sunny Florida beach with her flyboy husband and their four children. With more than forty books in print in over twenty countries, she has also celebrated wins for both a RITA® Award and a Booksellers’ Best Award. Catherine enjoys chatting with readers online—thanks to the wonders of the internet, which allows her to network with her laptop by the water! Contact Catherine through her website, catherinemann.com, find her on Facebook and Twitter (@CatherineMann1), or reach her by snail mail at PO Box 6065, Navarre, FL 32566.
Growing up near the beach, ANNIE WEST spent lots of time observing tall, burnished lifeguards—early research! Now she spends her days fantasising about gorgeous men and their love lives. Annie has been a reader all her life. She also loves travel, long walks, good company and great food. You can contact her at annie@annie-west.com.
LEANNE BANKS is a New York Times and USA TODAY bestselling author, who is surprised every time she realizes how many books she has written. Leanne loves chocolate, the beach and new adventures. To name a few, Leanne has ridden on an elephant, stood on an ostrich egg (no, it didn’t break), gone parasailing and indoor skydiving. Leanne loves writing romance because she believes in the power and magic of love. She lives in Virginia with her family and four-and-a-half-pound Pomeranian named Bijou. Visit her website at www.leannebanks.com.
KANDY SHEPHERD swapped a career as a magazine editor for a life writing romance. She lives on a small farm in the Blue Mountains near Sydney, Australia, with her husband, daughter and lots of pets. She believes in love at first sight and real-life romance—they worked for her! Kandy loves to hear from her readers. Visit her at kandyshepherd.com.
TESSA DARE is the New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of twenty historical romances. Her books have won numerous accolades, including Romance Writers of America’s prestigious RITA® award (twice) and the RT Book Reviews Seal of Excellence. Booklist magazine named her one of the ‘new stars of historical romance’, and her books have been contracted for translation in more than a dozen languages.
A librarian by training and a booklover at heart, Tessa makes her home in Southern California, where she lives with her husband, their two children, and a trio of cosmic kittens.
EVA LEIGH is the pen name of a RITA® Award-nominated romance author who writes novels chock-full of smart women and sexy men. She enjoys baking, tweeting about boots, and listening to music from the ’80s. Eva and her husband live in central California.
#1 New York Times bestselling author STEPHANIE LAURENS began writing romances as an escape from the dry world of professional science. Her hobby quickly became a career when her first novel was accepted for publication, and with entirely becoming alacrity, she gave up writing about facts in favor of writing fiction.
All Laurens’s works to date are historical romances, ranging from medieval times to the early 1900s, and her settings range from Scotland to India. The majority of her works are set in the period of the British Regency. Laurens has published more than 60 works of historical romance, including 36 New York Times bestsellers. Laurens has sold more than 20 million print, audio-, and e-books globally. All her works are continuously available in print and e-book formats in English worldwide, and have been translated into many other languages. An international bestseller, among other accolades, Laurens has received the Romance Writers of America® prestigious RITA® Award for Best Romance Novella 2008 for The Fall of Rogue Gerrard.
Laurens’s continuing novels featuring the Cynster family are widely regarded as classics of the historical romance genre. Other series include the Bastion Club Novels, the Black Cobra Quartet, and the Casebook of Barnaby Adair Novels. All of her previous works remain available in print and all e-book formats.
For information on all published novels, and on upcoming releases and updates on novels yet to come, visit Stephanie’s website: www.stephanielaurens.com.
To sign up for Stephanie’s Email Newsletter (a private list) for heads-up alerts as new books are released, exclusive sneak peeks into upcoming books, and exclusive sweepstakes contests, follow the prompts at Stephanie’s Email Newsletter Sign-up Page.
Stephanie lives with her husband and two cats in the hills outside Melbourne, Australia. When she isn’t writing, she’s reading, and if she isn’t reading, she’ll be tending her garden.
MILLS & BOON
Before you start reading, why not sign up?
Thank you for downloading this Mills & Boon book. If you want to hear about exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions, sign up to our email newsletter today!
SIGN ME UP!
Or simply visit
signup.millsandboon.co.uk
Mills & Boon emails are completely free to receive and you can unsubscribe at any time via the link in any email we send you.
The Royal Collection & The Historical Collection
Royal Affairs
Rebecca Winters, Cara Colter and Jessica Hart
Royal Sins
Maisey Yates, Caitlin Crews and Dani Collins
Royal Temptation
Carol Marinelli, Michelle Celmer and Brenda Harlen
Royal Babies
Nina Milne, Susan Meier and Cat Schield
Royal Protector
Caitlin Crews, Dana Marton and Catherine Mann
Royal Weddings
Annie West, Leanne Banks and Kandy Shepherd
The Wallflower Wager
Tessa Dare
Dare to Love a Duke
Eva Leigh
The Pursuits of Lord Kit Cavanaugh
Stephanie Laurens
Wild Wicked Scot
Julia London

www.millsandboon.co.uk
ISBN: 978-1-474-10000-7
THE ROYAL COLLECTION & THE HISTORICAL COLLECTION
His Princess of Convenience © 2016 Harlequin Books S.A Her Royal Wedding Wish © 2008 Cara Colter The Secret Princess © 2011 Jessica Hart Bound to the Warrior King © 2015 Maisey Yates Protecting the Desert Heir © 2015 Caitlin Crews Pursued by the Desert Prince © 2017 Dani Collins Protecting the Desert Princess © 2014 Carol Marinelli Virgin Princess, Tycoon’s Temptation © 2010 Michelle Celmer The Prince’s Second Chance © 2011 Brenda Harlen Claiming His Secret Royal Heir © 2017 Nina Milne Pregnant with a Royal Baby! © 2016 Linda Susan Meier Secret Child, Royal Scandal © 2016 Catherine Schield Traded to the Desert Sheikh © 2015 Caitlin Crews Royal Captive © 2010 Dana Marton His Pregnant Princess Bride © 2016 Catherine Mann The Sheikh’s Princess Bride © 2015 Annie West The Doctor Takes a Princess © 2011 Leanne Banks Crown Prince’s Chosen Bride © 2016 Kandy Shepherd
The Wallflower Wager © 2019 Eve Ortega Dare to Love a Duke © 2019 Ami Silber The Pursuits of Lord Kit Cavanaugh © 2019 Savdek Management Proprietary Limited Wild Wicked Scot © 2016 Julia London
Published in Great Britain 2019
by Mills & Boon, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF
All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, locations and incidents are purely fictional and bear no relationship to any real life individuals, living or dead, or to any actual places, business establishments, locations, events or incidents. Any resemblance is entirely coincidental.
By payment of the required fees, you are granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right and licence to download and install this e-book on your personal computer, tablet computer, smart phone or other electronic reading device only (each a “Licensed Device”) and to access, display and read the text of this e-book on-screen on your Licensed Device. Except to the extent any of these acts shall be permitted pursuant to any mandatory provision of applicable law but no further, no part of this e-book or its text or images may be reproduced, transmitted, distributed, translated, converted or adapted for use on another file format, communicated to the public, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of publisher.
® and ™ are trademarks owned and used by the trademark owner and/or its licensee. Trademarks marked with ® are registered with the United Kingdom Patent Office and/or the Office for Harmonisation in the Internal Market and in other countries.
www.millsandboon.co.uk
Version: 2020-03-02
Note to Readers
This ebook contains the following accessibility features which, if supported by your device, can be accessed via your ereader/accessibility settings:
Change of font size and line height
Change of background and font colours
Change of font
Change justification
Text to speech
Table of Contents
Cover
About the Authors
Title Page
Copyright
Note to Readers
The Royal Collection
Royal Affairs
His Princess of Convenience
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
Her Royal Wedding Wish
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
The Secret Princess
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
Royal Sins
Bound to the Warrior King
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
EPILOGUE
Protecting the Desert Heir
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Pursued by the Desert Prince
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
EPILOGUE
Royal Temptation
Protecting the Desert Princess
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
Virgin Princess, Tycoon’s Temptation
Dedication
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
The Prince’s Second Chance
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Epilogue
Royal Babies
Claiming His Secret Royal Heir
Back Cover Text
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Pregnant with a Royal Baby!
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
EPILOGUE
Secret Child, Royal Scandal
Dedication
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Royal Protector
Traded to the Desert Sheikh
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
Royal Captive
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Epilogue
His Pregnant Princess Bride
Dedication
Prologue
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Royal Weddings
The Sheikh’s Princess Bride
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
EPILOGUE
The Doctor Takes a Princess
Dedication
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Crown Prince’s Chosen Bride
Dedication
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
EPILOGUE
The Historical Collection
The Wallflower Wager
Booklist
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Epilogue
Acknowledgments
Dare to Love a Duke
Booklist
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Epilogue
Acknowledgments
The Pursuits of Lord Kit Cavanaugh
CHAPTER 1
CHAPTER 2
CHAPTER 3
CHAPTER 4
CHAPTER 5
CHAPTER 6
CHAPTER 7
CHAPTER 8
CHAPTER 9
CHAPTER 10
CHAPTER 11
CHAPTER 12
CHAPTER 13
CHAPTER 14
CHAPTER 15
CHAPTER 16
CHAPTER 17
EPILOGUE
Wild Wicked Scot
Back Cover Text
Dedication
PROLOGUE
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
EPILOGUE
About the Publisher
The Royal Collection
Royal Affairs
Rebecca Winters, Cara Colter and Jessica Hart
Royal Sins
Maisey Yates, Caitlin Crews and Dani Collins
Royal Temptation
Carol Marinelli, Michelle Celmer and Brenda Harlen
Royal Babies
Nina Milne, Susan Meier and Cat Schield
Royal Protector
Caitlin Crews, Dana Marton and Catherine Mann
Royal Weddings
Annie West, Leanne Banks and Kandy Shepherd

www.millsandboon.co.uk
The Royals
COLLECTION
Royal Affairs – January 2019
Royal Sins – February 2019
Royal Temptation – March 2019
Royal Babies – April 2019
Royal Protector – May 2019
Royal Weddings – June 2019
Royal Affairs
His Princess of Convenience
Rebecca Winters
Her Royal Wedding Wish
Cara Colter
The Secret Princess
Jessica Hart

www.millsandboon.co.uk
His Princess of Convenience
Rebecca Winters
This book is dedicated to every woman
who was once a little girl
with a dream to be a princess.
CHAPTER ONE
August, Monte Calanetti, Italy
THE FLOOR-LENGTH MIRROR reflected a princess bride whose flowing white wedding dress, with the heavy intricate beading, followed the lines of her slender rounded figure to perfection. It probably weighed thirty pounds, but her five-foot-nine height helped her to carry it off with a regal air.
The delicate tiara with sapphires, the something-borrowed, something-blue gift from the queen, Christina’s soon-to-be mother-in-law, held the lace mantilla made by the nuns. The lace overlying her red-gold hair, to the satin slippers on her feet, formed a whole that looked…pretty.
“I actually feel like a bride.” Her breath caught. “That can’t be me!” she whispered to herself. Her very recent makeover was nothing short of miraculous.
Christina Rose, soon-to-be bride of Crown Prince Antonio de L’Accardi of Halencia, turned to one side, then the other, as past memories of being called an ugly duckling, the chubby one, filled her mind.
From adolescence until the ripe old age of twenty-eight, she’d had to live with those unflattering remarks muttered by the people around her. Not that she really heard people say those things once she’d grown up and had been spending her time doing charity work on behalf of her prominent family. But she knew it was what people were thinking.
In truth her own parents were the ones who’d scarred her. They’d left her with nannies from the time she was born. And as she’d grown, her father had constantly belittled her with hurtful barbs by comparing her unfavorably to her friends. “Why is our daughter so dumpy?” she’d once heard him say. “Why didn’t we get a boy?” They’d picked out the name Christopher, but had to change it to Christina when she was born.
His unkind remarks during those impressionable years had been wounds that struck deep, especially considering that Christina’s mother had been a former supermodel.
Christina didn’t know how her father could have said such cruel things to his daughter when she had loved both her parents so much and desperately wanted their approval. Between her unattractive brownish-red hair she’d always worn in a ponytail, to her teeth that had needed straightening, she’d been an embarrassment to her parents, who moved in the highest of political and social circles in Halencia.
In order to keep her out of sight, they’d sent their overweight daughter to boarding school in Montreux, Switzerland, where forty-five girls from affluent, titled families were sent from countries around the world.
Her pain at having to live away year after year until she turned eighteen had been her deepest sorrow. Christina was a poor reflection on her parents, whose world revolved around impressing other important people in the upper echelons of society, including the favor of the royal family of Halencia. Her father particularly didn’t want her around when they were entertaining important dignitaries, which was most of the time.
If it hadn’t been for Elena, the daughter of Halencia’s royal family attending the French-speaking boarding school who’d become her closest friend, Christina didn’t know how she would have survived her time there. With both of them being from Italian-speaking Halencia, their nationality and own dialect had immediately created a bond between the two women.
Though Elena bore the title of Princess Elena de L’Accardi, she’d never used it at school or behaved as if she were better than Christina. If anything, she was a free spirit, on the wild side, and good-looking like her older brother, the handsome Crown Prince Antonio de L’Accardi, who was the heartthrob of Halencia, beloved by the people. He’d had a hold on Christina’s heart from the first moment she met him.
Elena never worried about breaking a few rules, like meeting a boyfriend at the local ice-skating rink in Montreux without their headmistress finding out. And worse, sneaking out to his nearby boarding school and going rowing on the lake at midnight, or sneaking her out for a joyride to Geneva in the Lamborghini his wealthy parents had bought him.
Christina had loved being with Elena and secretly wished she could be outgoing and confident like her dear friend. When the royal family went on their many vacations, Christina missed Elena terribly. It was during those times that Christina developed a close friendship with the quiet-spoken Marusha from Kenya.
Marusha was the daughter of the chief of the westernized Kikuyu tribe who’d sent his daughter to be educated in Switzerland. Marusha suffered from homesickness and she and Christina had comforted each other. Their long talks had prompted Christina to fly to Kenya after she turned eighteen and Marusha prevailed on her father to open doors for Christina to do charity work there.
Once she’d established a foundation in Halencia to deal with the business side, Christina stationed herself in Africa and lost herself in giving help to others. She knew she was better off being far away from home where she couldn’t be hurt by her parents’ dissatisfaction with her.
Caught up in those crippling thoughts, Christina was startled to hear a knock on the door off the main hallway.
“Mi scusi,” sounded a deep male voice she hadn’t heard since his phone call two months ago. “I’m looking for Christina Rose. Is she in here?”
What was Antonio doing up here outside the doors of the bridal suite?
In a state of absolute panic, Christina ran behind the screen to hide. She’d come up here to be alone and make sure her wedding finery fit and looked right. For him to see her like this before the ceremony would be worse than bad luck!
Her heart pounded so hard she was afraid he could hear it through the doors. Trying to disguise her voice to a lower pitch, she said, “Christina isn’t here, signor.”
“I think she is,” he teased. “I think it’s you playing a game with me.”
Heat filled her cheeks. He’d found her out. “Well, you can’t come in!”
“Now, that’s the Christina I remember. Still modest and afraid of your own shadow. What a way to greet your intended beloved.”
“Go away, Antonio. You should be at the chapel.”
“Is that all you have to say after I’ve flown thousands of miles to be with my fiancée?”
The large four-carat diamond ring set in antique gold belonging to the L’Accardi royal family had been given to her at their engagement four years ago. Though she’d gone through the sham ritual for the most worthy reason, it had been a personal horror for Christina.
But when her parents had acted overjoyed that she’d snagged the crown prince, she felt she’d gotten their attention at last. Becoming a royal princess had made them look more favorably at her, and that had helped her enter into the final wedding preparations with growing excitement.
The minute Antonio had flown back to the States, she put the ring in a vault for safekeeping. To damage it out in Africa would be unthinkable. She’d only gotten it out to wear on the few times they were together in Halencia. Now it was hidden in her purse.
Christina had never felt like a fiancée, royal or otherwise. She knew Antonio had been dreading this union as much as she had, but he was too honorable for his own good. Therefore Christina had to follow through on the bargain they’d made for Elena’s sake.
“I didn’t really believe this day would come.”
He’d stayed away in San Francisco on business. The press followed his every move and knew he’d only been with her a handful of times since the engagement. He’d flown home long enough to be seen with her at the palace when she flew in from Africa. They came together in order to perpetuate the myth that they were in love and looking forward to their wedding day.
“San Francisco is a long way from Halencia, Christina, but I should have made time before.”
“I know you’ve been married to your financial interests in Silicon Valley. No fiancée can compete with that.” Not when she knew he’d been with beautiful women who were flattered by his attention and couldn’t care less that he was engaged.
“You want to marry a successful husband, right? We had an agreement for Elena’s sake.”
He was right, of course, and it had been a secret between her and Antonio. But no one knew how Christina had pulled off such an improbable coup. The press had dubbed her the Cinderella Bride.
“I know, Antonio, and I plan to honor it. But not one second before I have to go downstairs to the chapel. Don’t you have something else to do?”
“I’m doing it right now. Do you mind if I put a little gift on the bed for you?” He’d said it kindly. “I promise I won’t look at you and I’ll hurry back out.”
“What gift? I don’t want anything.” She knew she sounded ungracious, but she couldn’t help it. She’d never been so nervous in her life!
“It’s your family brooch, the one that a Rose bride wears at her wedding to bring her marriage luck. One of the stones had come loose, so I had it repaired for you to wear and couldn’t get it back to you until today.”
The brooch?
Christina had heard the story behind the brooch all her life. It was supposed to bring luck, but she thought it had been lost a long time ago. She’d asked her wedding planner, Lindsay, to try and track it down for her, but to no avail. Her father’s aunt Sofia certainly hadn’t whispered a word about it during all the wedding preparations. Why hadn’t she given it to Christina herself? Furthermore how did Antonio get hold of it?
“Thank you for bringing it to me,” she said in a subdued voice. “It means a lot.” In fact, more than he could know. A special talisman to bring her luck handed down in the Rose family. Now she felt ready.
“It was important to me that you have it. I want this day to be perfect for you.”
She was thrilled by the gesture and heard the door open. If all he had to do was put it on the bed, she should be hearing the doors closing any second now.
“Are you still holding your breath waiting for me to go away, bellissima?”
Bellissima. Christina was not beautiful, but the way he said it made her feel beautiful, and today was her wedding day. She imagined he was trying to win her around with all the ways he knew how. She had no doubts he knew every one of them and more.
He laughed. “I’m still waiting, but we don’t need to worry, Christina. After all, this isn’t a real marriage.”
She took a deep breath, realizing he was teasing her. “Well, considering that this isn’t going to be a real marriage, then I’d say we need all the luck we can get, so please leave before even the ceremony itself is jinxed by your presence here.”
“A moment, per favore. It’s a lovely bridal chamber. The balcony off this suite shows the whole walled village of Monte Calanetti—it’s very picturesque. I do believe you have a romantic heart to have chosen the Palazzo di Comparino for our wedding to take place. All nestled and secluded in this place amongst the vineyards rippling over the Tuscan countryside. I couldn’t imagine a more perfect setting to celebrate our nuptials.”
“After living near the vineyards of the Napa Valley in California all these years, I doubt a spot like this holds much enchantment for you. I guess I should be thanking you for letting our wedding take place here instead of the cathedral in Voti. Now, will you please go so I can finish getting ready?”
* * *
Christina was still her vulnerable self. Antonio stopped the teasing for a minute. “If it’s any solace to you, I’m sorry for the position I’ve put you in.”
After a long silence she said in a defeated tone, “Don’t worry about it.” He heard a sadness in her voice. “To be honest, it isn’t as if I’ve had any other offers.”
Her comment revealed a little of her conflict, the same conflict torturing him. There was a part of him that wanted to be crazy in love. If only he’d been an ordinary man like his best man, Zach, who could marry the woman who’d captured his heart. To choose a bride his heart wanted had never been a possibility.
When he thought about Christina, he realized she was having similar feelings that increased his guilt, but he couldn’t dwell on that right now. It was too late for regrets. They would be married within the hour and he intended to be a good husband to her.
“Just remember we’re doing this for Elena,” he reminded her, hoping it would help her spirits. “She’ll be up in a minute to escort you to the chapel.” His eyes closed tightly for a moment. “Would it help if I told you I admire you more than any other woman I know?” It was the truth.
“Actually it wouldn’t,” she came back. “Thousands of women have entered into political unions disguised as marriage. We thought our engagement wouldn’t last long. I thought that after four years you would fly to Africa and tell me in person we didn’t have to go through with it.”
“I’m afraid that wasn’t our destiny, Christina. Everything has escalated out of control, the paparazzi have driven things to a higher pitch. Father’s chief assistant, Guido, had me on the phone, urging me to marry you as soon as possible. The people are fed up with my parents. They want our marriage to take place for the good of the monarchy, reminding me of the danger of an abolished royal family if we wait.”
“I know. That’s because they want you for their king, and you need a queen. I understand that, but I’d rather you didn’t start using meaningless platitudes with me.”
“I was complimenting you,” he asserted.
“I’m glad we could help preserve Elena’s reputation along with your family’s, but I don’t want compliments. Your sister is doing much better these days and has a boyfriend who treats her well. Let’s be happy for that and avoid any unnecessary pretense.”
Antonio had come to the bridal suite already deeply immersed in troubled thoughts about their forthcoming marriage. Her last remark only added to his anxiety. He put the small velvet-lined box at the foot of the bed. After closing the doors quietly behind him, he left the bridal suite and walked down the corridor to the staircase of the three-storied palazzo.
Zach, his best friend, would be waiting for him in the bedroom just off the staircase of the second floor. By now some hundred and fifty guests had arrived for the ceremony, including his parents and their entourage. The small wedding Christina wanted had grown to royal proportions. It had been inevitable.
Antonio had met Christina when he went to Switzerland many times to visit his younger sister at boarding school. She always asked if her roommate, Christina, could come along with them when they went out for fondue au fromage or took the ferry to see the sights around Lake Geneva.
Though Antonio thought of Christina as his sister’s pudgy friend, he’d found her sensible and soft-spoken, and probably the sweetest girl he’d ever met. That favorable impression of her grew deep roots when she’d phoned him in the middle of the night about Elena four years ago.
His sister had needed help because she and her loser addict boyfriend had been hauled off to jail on drug possession. Her boyfriend had been arrested and charged. What if Elena was next to be tainted with a jail record?
The paparazzi would have blown his sister’s mistake into a royal scandal that would do great damage to the already damaged royal family. Antonio’s parents hadn’t been in favor with the country for a long time and were constantly being criticized in the press for their profligate ways.
In order to keep Elena’s latest scandalous affair out of the news, Antonio had to think of something quick to take the onus off his wayward younger sister. Thankful beyond words for Christina’s swift intervention with that phone call, he was able to turn things around and had talked her into entering into a mock engagement with him to create a new piece of news.
If the press focused on his stunning announcement, it would take up column space and deflect the paparazzi’s interest in his sister’s scandal, thus saving Elena’s poor reputation and the family from further scrutiny and ruin.
After some persuasion Christina had agreed to fly to Halencia and become his fiancée because she loved Elena and had believed the engagement wouldn’t last long. They’d be able to go their own separate ways at some future date. Or so Antonio had thought…
But once he’d leaked the news of their engagement to the press and it had gone public, everything changed. Elena’s problems with the paparazzi went away like magic. Even more startling, the news of his engagement to the unknown Christina Rose grew legs.
The country approved of the Cinderella fiancée doing charity work in Kenya, whom he’d plucked out of obscurity. Immediately there was a demand for a royal wedding to become front and center. Guido was insistent on it happening immediately.
Antonio understood why. The royal approval ratings had dropped to an all-time low. In particular, his and Elena’s philandering parents drew criticism with their string of affairs. There were accusations of them dipping into the royal coffers to fund their extravagant lifestyle. To his chagrin, Elena was also becoming infamous for her wild party ways and uncontrolled spending habits.
The press had been calling for the king and queen to step down. It was the will of the people that the monarchy be turned into a republic. Or…put Antonio on the throne.
A lot had gone wrong with his family while Antonio was pursuing his studies and business interests in the US. To his amazement, the separation that had distanced him from all this scandal had endeared him further to his subjects, who saw him as the one person to save the royal dynasty! Christina’s hope that there wouldn’t be a wedding was dashed. So was his… Guido’s phone calls to him had changed everything.
And had made him feel trapped.
Once Antonio reached the second floor of the palazzo, he entered the bedroom designated as the groom’s changing room.
“There you are!” Zach declared with relief. “You have a letter from your father.” He handed him an envelope.
Antonio opened it and after reading it, he put the note back in the envelope and slid it in his trouser pocket. What were his parents up to now, spending the taxpayers’ money on a honeymoon he hadn’t asked for? He couldn’t say no, but this was the last time public money would be spent on private, privileged citizens of the royal family.
“It’s getting late,” Zach reminded him. “You have to finish getting ready now. Lindsay has the wedding planned down to the second.”
Antonio looked at his best man through veiled eyes. “I had to deliver the brooch to Christina so she could pin it on her wedding dress before the ceremony.”
“How did that go?”
“She was hiding behind a screen and told me to leave.” Considering the fact that she’d been forced to go through with this marriage they hadn’t planned on, he shouldn’t have been surprised she sounded so upset.
“That was wedding nerves. Christina was a sweetheart when Lindsay and I met with her for her fittings,” Zach said, helping him on with the midnight blue royal dress uniform jacket.
After their unexpected exchange upstairs, Antonio didn’t exactly agree with his friend. “She’s not happy about this wedding going ahead.”
Zach attached the royal blue sash over his left shoulder to his right hip, signaling his rank as crown prince. “She’s a big girl, Antonio. No matter how much she cares for Elena, she wouldn’t have agreed to an engagement with you if deep down she hadn’t wanted to. Christina doesn’t strike me as a woman who would bow out on a commitment once she’d given her word.”
Antonio grimaced. “She wouldn’t,” he admitted, “but she would have had every right. When I was talking to her upstairs, I heard a mournful sound in her voice. She thought our engagement would have ended before now and she wouldn’t have to go through with a real wedding.” He’d felt her pain. From here on out he’d do everything he could to make her happy.
“You both underestimated the will of the people who want you to be their ruler.”
His jaw hardened. “But she didn’t ask for this.” He had a gut feeling there was trouble ahead.
“So use that genius brain of yours and look at your wedding as new territory. Think of it the way you do with every challenge you face at work. Think it and rethink it until it comes out right.”
“Thanks for the advice, Zach.”
His friend meant well, but Antonio couldn’t treat it as he would a business problem. Christina wasn’t a problem. She was a flesh-and-blood human being who’d sacrificed everything for her friend Elena. That kind of loyalty was so rare, Antonio was humbled by it. His concern was to be worthy of the woman whose selflessness had catapulted her to the highest rank in the kingdom.
Zach gazed at him with compassion. “Are you all right?”
He sucked in his breath. “I’m going to have to be. Because of you, I was able to give Christina that brooch. I can’t thank you enough for getting it from Sofia.”
“You know I’d do anything for you.”
A knock on the outer door caused both of them to look around. “Tonio—” his sister called out, using her nickname for him. “It’s time. You should be out at the chapel.”
“I know. I’ll be right there.”
“I hope you know how much I love you, brother dear.”
“I love you too, Elena.”
“Please be happy. You’re marrying the sweetest girl in the whole world.”
“You don’t have to remind me of that.” He’d put Christina on a pedestal since she agreed to their engagement. But he’d heard another side come out of her in the bridal suite.
“Lindsay says you two have to hurry!”
Zach’s wife had planned this wedding down to the smallest detail. The schedule called for a four-thirty ceremony to avoid the heat of the day. He checked his watch. In the next fifteen minutes Christina would walk down the aisle and become his unhappy bride.
“We’re coming,” Zach answered for them.
Antonio glanced at Zach. “This is it.”
“You look magnificent, Your Highness.”
“I wish I felt magnificent. Let’s go.”
* * *
Christina heard Elena’s tap on the door of the suite. “Come in.”
Her friend hurried in, wearing a stunning blush-colored chiffon gown. On her stylishly cut dark blond hair she wore a tiara. “You look like the princess of every little girl’s dreams,” Christina cried softly.
“So do you. The tiara Mother gave you looks like it was made for you.” Elena walked all the way around her, looking her up and down. “Guess what? This afternoon all eyes are going to be on you, chère soeur.” They would be sisters in a few minutes. Tears smarted Christina’s eyes. “Oh, la-la, la-la,” she said. “My brother will be speechless when he sees you at the altar. Your hair, it’s like red gold.”
“I just had some highlights put in.”
“And you got your teeth straightened. How come you didn’t do it a lot earlier in your life?”
“Probably reverse snobbery. Everyone thought I looked pathetic, so why not maintain the image? I knew it irked my parents. It upset me that they couldn’t accept me for myself. But when the wedding date was announced, I realized I would have to be an ambassador of sorts.
“Antonio deserves the best, so I knew I had to do something about myself and dress the right way. Until a month ago, I never spent money on clothes. It seemed such an extravagance when there are so many people in the world who don’t have enough to eat. Elegant high fashion wouldn’t have changed the way I looked.”
“Oh, Christina.” Elena shook her head sadly. “I always thought you were pretty, but now you’re an absolute knockout! If all the girls at our boarding school could see you, they’d eat their hearts out.”
Christina’s cheeks went hot with embarrassment. “Don’t be silly.”
“I’m being truthful. You’ve lost weight since the last time I saw you. Your figure is gorgeous. With your height, the kind I wish I had, that tiara gives you the elegance of a young queen. I’m not kidding. Lindsay found you the perfect gown and I love the interlocking hearts of your brooch. Is there anything more beautiful than diamonds?”
“It’s been in the Rose family for years and supposed to bring luck. Antonio brought it to the room earlier. Do you think I pinned it in the right place?”
“It’s right above your heart where it should be. You look as pure and perfect as I know you are.”
She averted her eyes. “You know I’m not either of those things.”
“I know how much your parents have hurt you, but you can’t let that ruin your opinion of yourself. One day they’ll realize you’re the jewel in their crown. Today my brother is going to see you as his prize jewel. I’ve never told you this before, but all the time we were in Switzerland together, I had the secret hope he would end up marrying you one day.”
I had the same hope, Christina admitted to herself, but she’d never confess it to anyone, not even Elena.
“The day I met you at school, you became the sister I never had and you never judged me. That has never changed. After we left school, our friendship has meant more to me than you will ever know.”
“I feel the same,” Christina said with a tremor in her voice.
“That awful night I phoned you when Rolfe was arrested for drugs, I knew I could count on you to help me. I believe it’s destiny you contacted Tonio. Now you’re about to become his bride to save my reputation.” Her eyes glistened with tears. “You have to promise me you’ll be happy, Christina. Tonio’s the best if you’ll give him a chance.”
Christina reached for Elena’s hands. “I know he’s the best because he was always kind to me when we were in Montreux. And because of his sacrifice for you, that takes brotherly love and goodness to a whole new level. He honors his family and his heritage. Who couldn’t admire him?”
“But I want you to learn to love him!” Her eyes begged.
“You’re talking a different kind of love.” After he’d phoned to tell her the date they were going to be married, she was forced to accept her fate. “I haven’t dated much, Elena. I did spend time with one doctor in Africa. But when I got engaged to Antonio, that ended any possibility of a relationship with him or any man, let alone potential love.”
In a way, her engagement had helped her to hide from love for fear that she would never be good enough for anyone. If she wasn’t good enough for her parents, why would she be good enough for any man?
Still, her parents had been overjoyed with the engagement, which made her happy. And Christina had adored Antonio in secret for years, not only for the way he loved Elena, but for his hard-work ethic. In Christina’s new position as his wife, the number of people she’d be able to help with her charities would be vastly increased. Was it worth giving up on the possibility of true love?
Christina had never felt worthy of love and so had never been hopeful of meeting “the one.” At the end of the day she’d reconciled herself to this marriage.
“Can you honestly tell me you’re not excited about your wedding night?”
“Oh, Elena—you’re such a romantic and I know you feel guilty about what’s happening, but don’t let that worry you. Yes, I’m excited, but mostly I’m nervous. Antonio and I have never spent time alone together. You know what I mean. But Antonio has been with other women both before and probably after our engagement. My eyes are wide-open where he is concerned. After the women he has been with, I’m afraid I’m not going to compare.”
A stricken look entered Elena’s eyes. “Don’t you dare say that! And don’t think about any of his past relationships. He knew they would never amount to anything, and today he’s marrying you.”
“I know, but it’s still hard to believe.” Christina stared at her friend. “I wasn’t convinced Antonio planned to go through with our nuptials. You can’t imagine my surprise when he finally called me and said I needed to start making the wedding plans with Lindsay.”
“He meant it, Christina. I know he got engaged to you to save my skin, but he could have chosen any number of eligible royal hopefuls. Why do you think he chose you?”
“I was…convenient.”
“That’s not the answer and you know it. There was something deeper inside that drove him to choose you. I think you need to think about that as you walk down the aisle toward him today looking like any man’s dream. If you don’t believe me, take one more look in the mirror.”
“You’re very sweet.”
“It’s true. Tonio came to Switzerland a lot during our days at boarding school. He liked you right off and enjoyed your company. He trusts you.”
“But he’s not in love with me.”
“Give him a chance and he will fall in love with you. I’ve always loved you and feel all the more indebted to you for the sacrifice you’re making to save me and our family from scandal. Will you promise me one thing?”
“If I can.”
“Pretend that today you’re going to get married to the man you’ve always loved and who has always loved you.”
I have always loved him…from a distance. There was no pretense on Christina’s part.
Elena rushed over to her and they hugged.
“What’s wrong, Elena? Are those tears?”
“I just don’t want anything to go wrong. This wedding is all my fault. I’ll pray for you and Antonio to be happy.”
Christina took a big breath, sensing that deep down Elena was really worried. Why? What wasn’t she telling her, unless her guilt was working overtime?
“It’ll be fine, Elena.” She’d made up her mind about that. Today was her wedding day and she was living her fantasy of marrying the prince of her dreams. For once in her life she planned to enjoy herself. She could do it. She’d seen herself in the mirror and felt confident to be his bride.
“You’d better start working on it right now,” Elena warned. “Otherwise you’re going to give everyone a heart attack if you don’t make an appearance in the chapel in the next minute.”
“I’m ready.”
“I love you, Christina.”
“The feeling’s mutual. You have to know that by now.”
Elena blew her a kiss. “I do.”
Together they walked down the stairs to the foyer of the palazzo and out the main entrance to the courtyard. The chapel faced the palazzo across the way with a beautiful fountain in the center. Lindsay was waiting for them inside the church doors of the foyer with their flowers.
She let out a gasp when she saw Christina. “You’re perfect! Better than anything I’d imagined. So perfect, in fact, I can’t believe my eyes.”
Christina smiled at Zach’s wife. “You outdid yourself, Lindsay. All the credit goes to you. This dress is divine.”
Louisa, the owner of the palazzo, hurried toward her. “You’re the most stunning bride I’ve ever seen.”
“Thank you, Louisa. You look lovely too. I’m indebted to you for your generosity in letting us be married here. The Palazzo di Comparino is the most ideal setting for a wedding in all of Tuscany.”
“It’s been an honor for me. I told Prince Antonio the same thing.”
Louisa had given Christina a tour of the newly renovated chapel yesterday. She’d met the elderly priest who would be marrying them. While he walked with her in private, they chatted about the renovations.
She’d been utterly enchanted with the fabulous unearthed fresco of the Madonna and child now protected by glass. The charming chapel had an intimacy and spiritual essence. It thrilled her to know she’d be taking her vows in here. She intended to make this the perfect wedding day.
“Everyone is inside waiting,” Lindsay whispered. “Here’s your bouquet, Christina.”
“Oh—these white roses are exquisite.”
“Just like you. And here’s your bouquet, Elena.” Lindsay had matched the flowers to the soft blush of her gown. “Zach will hand you the ring to give Antonio when the time comes during the ceremony. As we rehearsed, once you hear the organ, you and your father will enter the chapel with Elena five paces behind you. The king and queen are seated on the right side with their retinue. Your family and friends are on the left.”
Christina looked around. “Where’s my father?”
“I’m right behind you.”
As she turned, her heart thudded mostly in fear in case she saw rejection in his dark gray eyes. He had a patrician, distinguished aura and was immaculately dressed. His gaze studied her features for a moment. “I’m glad to see you’ve changed for the better. Today the Rose family can be proud of you.”
“You look very handsome too, Father.”
“Christina?” Lindsay reminded her. “Take your father’s arm.”
The organist had started playing Wagner’s “Wedding March.” There’d probably never been this many people inside. Her joy was almost full.
She clung to her father as they slowly made their way down the aisle of the ornate interior. The only eyes she searched for were her mother’s, wanting her approbation. Her mother, who was in her midfifties, was still a beautiful brunette woman and the envy of many.
Just once Christina hoped to find a loving smile meant for her alone. As she passed the pew, she made eye contact with her. A proud smile broke out on her mother’s perfectly made-up face. That acknowledgment made Christina feel as if she were floating as she walked toward her prince.
She focused her attention on the two men standing at the altar before the priest. Zach, as best man, stood several inches taller than the crown prince, who was six foot one, according to Elena. They were watching her progress.
A slight gasp escaped her lips when she looked into the startling blue eyes of the man she was about to pledge her life to. It had been several months since the last time she saw him at the palace. His visit had been brief.
In full dark blue ceremonial dress, Antonio looked so splendid she was shaken by her reaction to him. His light brown hair, smart and thick, was tipped with highlights from the sun, reflecting a healthy sheen. With such a lean, fit body, he was the epitome of a royal prince every little girl dreamed of marrying one day.
How incredible that Christina was about to become his wife. If I were the type, I’d pass out at the feet of the most desirable man in all Halencia. But I’m not going to make any mistakes today. This is my wedding day. I love it already.
Caught up in all the wedding preparations, she felt that she was his beautiful bride and she intended to be the woman he was excited to marry. Her teenage dream had come true. The only thing more she could ask of this day was that the fantasy would last forever.
CHAPTER TWO
MAYBE ANTONIO’S EYES were playing tricks on him. The stunning woman walking on the arm of her father with the grace of a queen had to be Christina, but it was a Christina he’d never seen or imagined.
When did the brownish-red hair, which he remembered she’d worn in a ponytail, turn out to be a spun red gold?
Had her body ever looked like an hourglass before now?
The lace veil against her smooth olive skin provided a foil for her finely arched dark eyebrows. Because of the light coming through the stained glass windows, her crystalline gray eyes had taken on a silvery cast. Her red mouth had a passionate flare he’d never even noticed.
His gaze fell lower to the brooch she’d pinned to the beaded bodice of her wedding dress. The diamonds sparkled in the light with every breath she took.
Elena approached her side to take the bouquet from her. When Christina smiled at his sister, Antonio caught its full effect and was blindsided by the change in her.
While he’d been talking to her earlier in the bridal suite, parts of her sounded like the woman he’d gotten engaged to four years ago. But she wasn’t the same person on the outside. It threw him so completely that he felt a nudge from Zach to pay attention to the priest.
“Your Highness?” he whispered. “If you will take your bride-to-be by the hand.”
Antonio reached for her right hand. Her cool, dry grip was decisive. If she was suffering wedding nerves, it didn’t show. He didn’t know if he was disappointed by her demeanor, which seemed unflappable.
In a voice loud enough to fill the interior, the priest began. “Welcome, all of you. Today we are gathered here for one of the happiest occasions in all human life, to celebrate before God the marriage of a man and woman who love each other. Marriage is a most honorable estate, created and instituted by God, signifying unto us the mystical union that also exists between Christ and the Church. So too may this marriage be adorned by true and abiding love. Let us pray.”
Antonio bowed his head, but his burden of guilt over compelling Christina to follow through with this marriage weighed heavily on him. As Zach had reminded him, she’d entered into this union of her own free will because of her love for Elena, but the words may this marriage be adorned by true and abiding love pierced him to the core of his being.
In the past four years he’d done nothing to show her love. The only thing true about this marriage was their love for Elena, and on his part the need to preserve the monarchy. But at this moment Antonio made up his mind that their love for his sister would be the foundation upon which they built a life together.
Antonio’s absence from her life except for those four quick visits had made certain she had no anticipation of love to come. To his surprise she sounded happy as she repeated the marriage covenant. He hadn’t expected that.
When it was his turn to recite his vows, he felt the deep solemnity of the moment and said them with fervency.
“Who holds the rings?”
“I do,” Zach responded.
“Grant that the love which the bride and groom have for each other now may always be an eternal round. Antonio? Take the ring and put it on Christina’s finger saying, ‘With this ring, I thee wed.’”
She presented her left hand while he repeated the words. Her hand trembled a little as he slid the wedding band next to the diamond from the royal family treasury he’d given her four years earlier. So she wasn’t quite as composed as he’d thought, but it didn’t make him feel any better. If anything, he felt worse because he’d done nothing to ease her into this union and lamented his selfishness.
Now it was her turn to present him with his ring. She took it and placed it on Antonio’s finger. His new bride was suddenly so composed that again he marveled. “With this ring, I thee wed,” she said in a steady voice.
They were married.
The deed was done.
“Antonio and Christina, as the two of you have joined this marriage uniting as husband and wife, and as you this day affirm your faith and love for each other, I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and suggestions of one another.
“Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges, and live each day that you may share it together. From this day forward you shall be each other’s home, comfort and refuge, your marriage strengthened by your love and respect.”
Antonio’s shame increased. I’ve shown her no respect.
“You may now kiss your bride.”
When Antonio turned to her, he saw a look of consternation in her eyes. Oh, Christina. What have I done to you? You’re so good. So sweet. His eyes focused on her lovely mouth before he grasped her upper arms gently and kissed her.
Not only her lips but her whole body trembled. Her fragrance assailed him. He deepened the kiss, wanting her to know he planned to make their marriage work. Whether she was putting on a show for everyone, or responding instinctively to new emotions bombarding her as they were him, he didn’t know. But she kissed him back and he found himself wanting it to go on and on.
The priest cleared his throat, prompting Antonio to lift his mouth from hers. A subtle blush had entered her cheeks. He removed his hands.
“Antonio and Christina, if you’ll turn around.” When they’d done his bidding, he said in a loud voice, “May I present Crown Prince Antonio de L’Accardi and his royal bride, Princess Christina Rose. Allow them to walk down the aisle to the foyer of the chapel, where you can mingle outside.”
Elena came forward to give Christina her bouquet, and then the organist played the wedding march. Taking a deep breath, Antonio grasped her free hand, still feeling the tingly effect of her warm, generous mouth on his. He guided her to the first pew where his parents were seated and stopped long enough for both of them to bow to the king and queen of Halencia.
To show Christina’s parents his respect, he escorted her across the aisle to their pew to acknowledge them. He gave her a sideward glance. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. He didn’t know what that was about.
How could you know when you haven’t spent any real time getting to know her?
More upset with himself and even more shaken by their kiss, he walked her slowly down the aisle. He darted her another glance, but this time she was smiling at everyone. She was so gracious it impressed the hell out of him. She could have been born to royalty.
He’d honored Christina’s wishes by letting her plan the wedding here instead of the fourteenth-century cathedral in Voti. She’d insisted on a simple ceremony. If there’d been any royal formality or long traditional ceremony, she wouldn’t have agreed. Antonio had been so thankful she hadn’t backed out that he’d fallen in with her every wish.
In private he’d asked his parents to take a backseat so this could be Christina’s day. She was beloved of the people, but she couldn’t have abided all the pomp and circumstance. Since his parents were resigned to their fate to put Antonio on the throne, they’d acceded to his wishes. He’d even heard them say they were relishing the idea of retirement and looking forward to more freedom in the future.
At his engagement four years ago, Antonio had vowed to sacrifice his personal freedom and return from California to take the throne at a later date with Christina at his side. He’d felt a strong loyalty to his country and had always been conscious of his royal duty. But he’d only been prepared to marry her on his terms, and hadn’t considered her fears.
There were going to be a lot of changes after his coronation in another week. He had a raft of constitutional issues that would put the royal family in a figurehead role, with specific duties. There would be a much reduced civil list, no hangers-on supported by the state; all personal belongings and lifestyle choices and holidays would be paid for by personal business interests rather than the state.
The areas of change went on and on, which was why the monarchy had been on the brink of disaster. This marriage would hopefully turn the tide of criticism. Christina’s values of hard work and true charity resonated with the people. Her example of selflessness was the big reason they’d embraced Antonio as their soon-to-be king. Antonio still had to prove himself equal to the task. And much more, like becoming the husband Christina deserved.
He walked her outside and across the courtyard to the terrace bedecked in flowers at the side of the palazzo. A small orchestra was playing a waltz at one end of the terrace with an area reserved for dancing. Hundreds of tiny lights strewn among the trees and flowers made it look like a true fairyland and had created a heavenly fragrance. The grand serving table with its fountain and flowers was surrounded by exquisitely set tables, an enchanting sight he’d always remember.
The late-afternoon Tuscan sunshine shone down on them. The picturesque setting and vineyard had an indescribable beauty, yet all he could see for the moment was the stunning bride draped in alençon lace, still clinging to his hand. Antonio swallowed hard.
She’s my wife! She’s the woman I promised to love and cherish.
Suddenly he seemed to see a whole new world ahead of them, uncharted as yet. Her faith in their marriage made him open his eyes to new possibilities. This was their wedding day. He wanted it to be wonderful for both of them. After their kiss at the altar, he was eager to feel her in his arms.
* * *
“Christina? Look this way.”
She was so dazed by what had happened at the end of the ceremony that she was hardly aware of the photographers brought in to make a record of their wedding day. When Antonio had deepened their kiss, she felt a charge of energy run through her body like a current of electricity. She could still feel his compelling mouth on hers.
Maybe this was how every bride felt when kissed on her wedding day. But Antonio wasn’t just any man. He was her husband, for better or worse.
Before everyone could crowd around to congratulate them, Antonio pulled her close. “Do you mind if we talk to our guests later? I’d like to dance with you first,” he said in his deep voice.
Her heart thumped hard before she looked at him. “I’d love it.”
His hot blue eyes played over her features. “Let me put your bouquet on this table.”
After he laid it down, Christina felt his arm go around her waist. The contact reminded her of the kiss they’d shared at the altar. She hadn’t been the same since and was more aware of him than ever as he led her to the dance area.
She couldn’t help thinking back to the time she’d been at boarding school. Never in her wildest imagination would she have believed she’d eventually become the wife of Elena’s dashing older brother. This moment was surreal.
As he drew her into his arms she said, “You need to know I haven’t done much dancing in my life.”
He held her closer. “Didn’t they teach you to dance at boarding school?”
“Are you kidding? Whatever you think goes on at boarding school simply doesn’t happen. We were all a bunch of girls who’d rather be home. We all had a case of homesickness and waited for the letters that didn’t arrive. We ate, studied and slept four to a room in an old freezing-cold chateau. You don’t even want to know how frigid the water closet could be.”
He laughed out loud, causing everyone to look at them.
“Once a week we were allowed to go to town with the chaperone. She chose the places we could visit. Elena managed to scout out the dancing places we weren’t supposed to visit, then dragged me with her where we met guys who flocked around her.”
“Sounds like my sister.”
“She taught me the meaning of fun. The rest of the time we went to a symphony or an opera, and other times we went to a play, always on a bus. I liked the plays, especially one adapted from Colette’s writings about a dog and cat.”
Antonio started moving them around the terrace decorated with urns of flowers. “Tell me about them,” he whispered against her hot cheek. His warm breath sent little tingles of delight through her body.
“Elena and I bought the books and studied the lines to help us with our French. Both animals loved their master and mistress. Their battles were outrageous and hilarious.”
“You’ll have to lend me the book to read.”
“Anytime. Wouldn’t it be fun if animals really could talk? I used to love the Doctor Doolittle books as a child. When I first got to Africa, I thought I really had arrived in Jollijinki Land.”
He lips twitched and he held her a little tighter, but her gown provided a natural buffer. “I have a feeling you could entertain me forever.”
She moved her head so she could look into his eyes. Marrying Antonio felt right. She felt like a princess. The feeling was magical. She was living her fantasy and never wanted it to end. Her parents were proud of her today. Everything was getting better with them. “This is a new experience for both of us, Antonio. Forever sounds like a long time. Let’s just take it one step at a time.”
His lips brushed hers unexpectedly, creating havoc with her emotions. “One step at a time it is. Since everyone is watching us, let’s put on a show, shall we?”
She smiled at him. “I thought we’d already been doing that.”
“They haven’t seen anything yet.”
Her adrenaline gushed as he waltzed them around the terrace. It didn’t surprise her that he knew what he was doing. She followed his lead as he dipped her several times, causing people to clap. Dancing with him like this was a heady experience she hadn’t anticipated. He must have been enjoying it too, because one dance turned into another.
“This is fun,” he murmured against her lips. “Your idea for having our wedding here at the palazzo has turned out to be sensational. I remember once when the three of us climbed into the mountains above the vineyards lining Lake Geneva and came to an old farmhouse that had been turned into a quaint inn.
“You said it was your favorite place and went there often on your hikes and bicycle rides with Elena for fondue bourguignonne. I think you must have had it in mind when you chose the Palazzo di Comparino for our wedding. I see similarities.”
Her head tilted back in surprise. “I can’t believe you remembered that hike, let alone made the association with this place.”
His gaze played over her features. “I’ve remembered all our outings. The truth is, I found you and my sister more entertaining than most of my friends, with the exception of Zach.” His comment made her smile.
“When I did fly to Switzerland, I came because I wanted to. Being with you two was like taking a breath of fresh air and kept me grounded. I’ve never told you this, but I was always relieved to know you were there to help temper my sister. She’s always had trouble with boundaries.”
“And I was the insipid, boring tagalong, afraid to break out of my shell, right?”
He frowned. When he did that, he looked older and quite fierce. “You were shy, but amazingly kind to my sister. Even when she got herself into impossible situations you never judged her.”
“You were kind to me too by including me. Remember the day we visited the Chateau de Chillon? We’d climbed up on the ramparts and I was taking a picture when I dropped my camera by mistake and it fell into the lake several hundred feet below.”
“You should have seen the tragic look on your face,” he teased.
“I was so upset, but you turned everything around when you bought me a new one just like it and gave it to me before you left us at the school.” She felt her eyes smart. “That was the kindest thing anyone had ever done for me.”
“Then we’re even because Elena needed a constant friend like you and you were there for her in her darkest hours. You have no idea what that meant to me. I knew I could always count on you. I wish I could say the same for our parents. They’ve been so caught up in a lifestyle that has cost them the confidence of the people that they’ve neglected Elena, who needed a strong hand.”
Christina sucked in her breath. “I needed her friendship too.”
“Elena told me you had problems with your parents.”
“Yes, but I don’t want to talk about them right now. We were talking about your sister. She’s so sweet. Elena cared about me when no one else did. She made me believe in myself.”
“The two of you have an unbreakable bond. Otherwise you wouldn’t have stayed close over all these years. You don’t know how lucky you are. How rare that is.”
“According to Elena, you have that kind of relationship with Zach.”
He nodded. “But I didn’t have a friend like you while I was at boarding school and college. It wasn’t until I moved to San Francisco. If you want to know a secret, I envied you and Elena.”
She heard a loneliness in his admission that went deep. “Because you’re the prince, it was probably hard for you to confide in someone else during those early years. With you being expected to rule one day, you had to watch every step.”
Antonio stopped dancing and grasped her hands in both of his. “You understand so much about me, Christina.” His blue eyes had darkened with emotion. “But you paid a price by agreeing to get engaged to me.”
Giddy with happiness she said, “What price is that when I’m having the wedding of my dreams?”
Her thoughts flew back to their engagement. The king and queen had thrown the supposedly happy couple a huge, glossy engagement party, but it had been the worst night of Christina’s life. To have to be on show, self-consciously standing next to the most gorgeous man she’d ever known, she’d never felt so unglamorous in her life. Especially when she knew her parents considered her a failure.
Yet they’d acted thrilled over the engagement and made such a fuss over her that it made her happy that they showed her that kind of attention. She’d been starved for it. But once she saw the photos, she’d been unable to bear the sight of herself looking so dull and plump. But that was a long time ago and she refused to dwell on it.
The guests had been going through the buffet line before finding their seats at individual linen-covered tables with baskets of creamy roses and sunflowers. Christina had to admit the estate and grounds looked beautiful. A fountain modeled after the one in the courtyard of a draped nymph holding a shell formed the centerpiece. Everything looked right out of a dreamworld, including the beautifully dressed people.
Antonio drew her even closer as they walked past the guests to get their food. He handed her a plate and they moved back and forth, choosing a delicious tidbit here and there. But she was too happy and stimulated to sit down to a big meal with him at a table reserved for them alone.
Several of the guests had started to dance. Among them Louisa, who was being partnered by Nico. According to Louisa, the two of them weren’t on the best of terms, but the way he was looking at her right now, Christina got the feeling they had a strong attraction. Well, well. It appeared the festive party mood had infected everyone.
Antonio finished what was on his plate. Since hers was empty, he put them both on the table. When he looked at her she was filled with strong emotion and said, “Today I’m so happy to be your wife, Antonio. I mean that with all my heart.”
“Christina,” he said in a husky voice, squeezing her hand. “Because of your sacrifice for me—for the country—I trust you with my life.” He said it like a vow and kissed her fingers in a gesture so intimate in front of the wedding guests that she made up her mind to be the best wife possible.
Just then Louisa happened to pass by her. “You look radiant,” she whispered.
Christina was still reacting to Antonio’s gesture as well as his words. “So did you out there dancing with Nico.”
“Who knew he could waltz?”
Her comment made Christina chuckle. Antonio smiled at her. “I want to dance the whole evening away with you, but I think we need to say something to our parents.”
They walked hand in hand toward the king and queen and they all chatted for a moment. Christina’s parents were seated by them. While Antonio was still talking with his parents for a minute, her mother, dressed in an oyster silk suit, got up from the table to greet Christina with a peck on the cheek.
Though Christina had known this began as a publicity stunt, she’d tried to win her parents’ affection. Four years later she was still trying and had hopes that her marriage to the future king had softened their opinion of her.
Her mother stared into her eyes. “You look lovely, Christina. I do believe that tint on your hair was the right shade.”
A compliment from her mother meant everything. “I’m glad you like it.”
“It’s a good thing Lindsay planned everything else, including your new royal wardrobe. You’ll always want to look perfect for Antonio.”
“I plan to try.”
“I know you will. Certainly today you’ve succeeded.” Her voice halted for a minute before she added, “You’ve never looked so attractive.”
Christina’s eyes moistened. She couldn’t believe her mother was actually paying her another compliment. In fact, she sensed her mother wanted to say more but held back.
“Grazie, Mama,” she said in a tremulous voice, and kissed her mother’s cheek.
Marusha stood nearby. Christina hugged her. She’d flown in for the wedding. Her family would be coming for the coronation. For this ceremony, only their closest friends and relatives made up the intimate gathering.
Next came Christina’s great-aunt Sofia. “You look enchanting.” The older woman embraced her. “Working in Africa has made all the difference in you,” she said quietly. “You have a queenly aura that comes naturally to you.”
Christina craved her aunt’s warmth and hugged her extra hard. “I’m thrilled to be wearing the brooch.” She was glad Antonio had sneaked up to the bridal chamber to give it to her.
“It suits you. I’m so proud of you I could burst.”
“Don’t do that!” she said as they broke into gentle laughter.
“I’ve been watching your handsome husband. He’s hardly taken his eyes off you since we came outside.” Her brown gaze conveyed her sincerity. “I can see why. You’re a vision, and you’re going to help Prince Antonio transform our country into its former glory. I feel it in these old bones. I have the suspicion that you didn’t need the brooch to bring you good luck. You and your prince are special, you know?”
No, Christina didn’t know, but she loved her aunt for saying so. “I love you.”
Her great-aunt kissed her on the cheek before Elena rushed in to hug her hard. “Ooh—you’re the most gorgeous bride I ever saw. I do believe you’ve knocked the socks off Tonio. All the time he’s been talking to the parents, he’s had his eye on you.”
Sofia had said the same thing. From the mouths of two witnesses…
“The two of you looked so happy out there it seemed like you were sharing some great secret. By the way, in passing I heard your mother tell your aunt Sofia that she’d never been so proud of you.”
“Thank you for telling me. Things seem to be better with Mother,” she whispered. “It is a beautiful wedding, isn’t it?”
“It’s fabulous, and you know why? Because you’re Tonio’s wife and will make him a better man than he already is. Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me. He’s going to feel the same way once he gets to really know you the way I do.”
Tears glistened on Christina’s eyelashes. She hugged her again. “We’re true sisters now,” she whispered.
CHAPTER THREE
“YOUR HIGHNESS, THE photographer is waiting for you and your bride to cut the wedding cake.”
Antonio switched his gaze to Zach, but his mind and thoughts had been concentrated on Christina and it took a moment for him to get back to the present. “Thanks, Zach. We’re coming.”
“I hope you love wedding cake,” she whispered as they made their way to the round table holding the fabulous three-tiered cake.
He flashed her a quick smile. “Is this the moment you’re going to get your revenge on me for past misdeeds?”
“If you’re referring to the chocolate you fed me full of cherry cordial that dripped down my blouse on one of our outings, I wouldn’t be surprised.” The impish look in her beautiful gray eyes was so unexpected that his heart skipped a beat.
“Be gentle,” he begged, putting his arms around her from behind to help her make the first cut with the knife. Another chuckle escaped her lips. With great care she picked up the first piece and turned to him, waving it in the air as if trying to decide how to feed it to him. This produced laughter from the guests.
“Just take your best shot, whatever you have in mind.”
“So I do have you a little bit worried.”
“Please, Christina.”
“I tell you what. I’ll have a napkin ready.” She plucked one off the table. “Now open sesame.”
He closed his eyes and obeyed her command.
“You have to keep your eyes open, coward,” she said in a low teasing voice.
“I can’t do both,” he teased back.
“Then I’ll eat it instead.”
Shocked by her response, he opened his eyes only to be fed the cake, part of which fell onto his chin into the napkin she held for him. The wedding guests laughed and clapped their hands. Of course everything had been caught by the videographer.
Christina cleaned him up nicely, then kissed his chin. “Thanks for being a good sport, Your Highness.”
“Don’t call me that.”
She looked surprised. “No?”
“Not ever.”
She flashed him a smile. “Are we having our first fight?”
Her question caught him off guard. Before he could respond, Lindsay came up to Christina with her bridal bouquet. “When you’re ready to leave the party, you can toss it behind you.”
“Thank you, Lindsay. All your planning has made this the most beautiful wedding party in the world. I’ve never been happier.”
“You look radiant, Christina.” She gave her a hug, and Antonio saw his wife whisper something to her in private.
“It’s already being taken care of,” Lindsay whispered back, but Antonio read her lips.
Intrigued, he couldn’t wait to get his bride alone, but no one was ready to leave the reception yet and Zach had snatched her away to dance. He decided now was the time to dance with his mother, then his mother-in-law.
The queen gave him a hug before he danced her around the terrace. “You’re going to have to keep an eye on that one,” she said, eyeing Christina, who was still whirling around with Zach. “She isn’t quite as docile as I remember.”
“She’s her own person,” Antonio replied with the sudden thrilling realization that his new bride might mean more to him than he could have imagined.
“Indeed she is. You both look perfectly marvelous together. She’s changed so much since the engagement that I hardly recognize her. You have no idea how glad I am that you’ve come home for good to settle down. A man needs marriage, and your marriage is good for the monarchy. I’m very happy with you today.”
“Thank you, Mama.” Except that marriage hadn’t stopped his parents from having their offstage affairs.
He twirled her back to the table and asked Christina’s mother to dance. She had been a former fashion model and was still a very attractive woman. But as he gazed at Christina, who was laughing quietly with Zach, he thought she was the real beauty. Not only in her appearance, but in her character.
“Are you sorry our daughter wanted the wedding here instead of at the cathedral in Voti?”
“Anything but. Don’t you think every woman should be able to have the wedding of her dreams where she wants it?”
“But you’re the crown prince.”
Antonio smiled at her. “Tonight I’m a new bridegroom and I can’t imagine a more perfect setting for Christina and me than this delightful spot in Tuscany.”
“Then I’m glad for both of you. You make a stunning pair.”
“Grazie.”
He could still hear Christina’s words when she’d told him what it was like at boarding school. We were all a bunch of girls who’d rather be home. We all had a case of homesickness and waited for the letters that didn’t arrive. The emptiness in her voice had conveyed pain, even after all these years.
If he didn’t do anything else, he would make certain she didn’t feel pain because of him. “Did you visit her in Africa?”
“We made it over once and were guests in the palace of Marusha’s parents. They’re very westernized there.”
“Your daughter has made a big contribution. It’s no small thing she has done to help those in poverty.”
“I’m very proud of her.”
He was glad to hear it. On that note he danced her back to the table. After thanking her, he went over to the table where Marusha was seated and asked her to dance with him. The charming woman had come with her husband. He gave her a turn around the terrace.
“You honor me, Your Highness. I’m very happy Christina is your bride. We hope you’ll both come to Kenya and stay with us.”
“I’ve always wanted to travel there and promise to visit you when the time is right. You honor us by coming. Christina thinks the world of you and your family.”
“We feel the same. Thank you.”
Once she was seated, Antonio hurried to find Christina, who was talking to Elena. His sister smiled at him. “It’s about time you paid attention to your bride.”
“First I want a dance with you, little sister, if it’s all right with my wife.”
Christina darted him a serious glance. “She’s the reason we even know each other. You’re welcome to enjoy her for as long as you want.”
He knew she meant that and moved Elena around the terrace. She had a gleam in her eye. “Having fun, brother dear? More than you thought?”
“Much more,” he confessed.
“Christina has that effect on people. Mother can’t get over the change in her. I told her that Christina is like the woman in the stone. All Michelangelo had to do was chip away at the marble until her beauty emerged for all to see.”
His sister had just put the right words to his thoughts. “It’s a perfect analogy.”
She studied his features. “It’s growing dark. Are you ready to leave the party?” she asked with a sly smile.
“The truth?”
“Always.”
“I feel like I did the first time I had to jump out of a plane during my military service.”
Elena chuckled. “Since you survived, I’m not worried.”
“In all honesty, I haven’t made this easy for Christina by maintaining distance between us over the last four years.”
“Don’t worry about it. She married you today and I think you’ve both met your match. I’m so happy for both of you I could burst. Don’t let me keep you from whisking your bride away.” She kissed his cheek and hurried off.
He was left standing there while her last comment sank in. Antonio hated to admit he felt nervous for what was to come. He’d be taking his wife upstairs to the bridal chamber. This was a new experience for him. Taking a fortifying breath, he made a beeline for Christina, who was talking to more guests.
Lindsay came up to him. “Christina still needs to throw her bridal bouquet to the crowd. If you’re ready, take her to the front of the palazzo and I’ll make the announcement to the guests to follow you.”
“Thank you for all you’ve done.”
“It has been my pleasure.”
He kissed her cheek before reaching for his wife. Christina’s gaze flicked to his. “What is it?”
“We have one more ritual to perform.” He picked up the bridal bouquet. After putting it in her hands, he slid an arm around her slender waist. Her lovely body was a perfect fit for him.
“I already know where I’m going to throw it,” she whispered as they left the terrace and walked around to the front entrance of the palazzo.
“So do I,” he drawled.
“Antonio?” She eyed him with surprising tenderness. “Thank you for dancing with Marusha. To dance with the future king had to be one of the big highlights of her life.”
“I wanted a chance to thank her for coming. She’s been your true friend all these years. I have a feeling you two are going to miss each other.”
“That’s something I want to talk to you about, but we’ll discuss it later.”
An alarm bell went off in Antonio’s head. Did Christina want to go back to Africa? She’d lived a whole period of her life there that he knew nothing about. In fairness, she didn’t know details about his former life either. While he stood there filled with new questions that needed answers, the guests had congregated in the courtyard.
Before he knew what she was doing, his wife cleared her throat and faced the crowd. “Antonio and I want to thank you all for coming to share in our beautiful wedding day. I’m one of the lucky girls in the world who actually got to marry a real prince. His kindness to his sister, Princess Elena, my dearest friend, proved his princely worth to me years ago. I can honestly say there’s not another man like him, prince or otherwise. So this is for you, Elena. May you find your own wonderful prince too!”
Christina turned her back to the crowd and threw the bouquet in a southeasterly direction that was no mistake with Elena standing there. It was no accident that everyone made room around his sister so she could catch it. Then a roar of approval and clapping burst from the crowd. Antonio’s breath caught. With that speech she’d ensured her place in everyone’s heart as their queen-to-be.
Filled with emotion, he put his arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her lips. She kissed him back and it felt convincing, but was this a show for the camera? He’d felt a distinct spark when they kissed at the altar. But if it had only been on his part, he didn’t want to believe it right now. Was she nervous too?
Without asking her permission, he grasped her hand and drew her along with him to the inside of the palazzo. He leaned back against the closed door, still holding her hand. Now that the moment was here to be alone with her, he felt slightly breathless. The wedding night was upon them.
“Are you up to climbing to the third floor?”
* * *
The bridal suite.
Their bridal suite now. The kiss Antonio had given her in front of the palazzo felt…hungry. In that moment she’d experienced an answering rush of desire that took her by storm. Her fantasy had taken on a new dimension. What was going on with her?
“I think I can about make it,” she teased, and started her ascent. But after a few steps she picked up her gown to give her the freedom to hurry the rest of the way. His footsteps followed, keeping pace with the thundering of her heart.
She almost ran down the hallway to the bridal suite. Before she reached the doors, he caught up to her and picked her up in his arms. “Oh—” she half squealed, surprised her gown didn’t hinder him. She knew her husband was strong, but being held close to him like this made her realize what a rock-hard physique he possessed, and he smelled wonderful.
Their faces were only inches apart. He smiled into her eyes. The blue of his irises had a depth of brilliance that ignited every pulse point in her body. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve been looking forward to this all day.” He slowly lowered his mouth to hers and began kissing her.
A burst of desire swept through her. Things were moving much faster than she’d anticipated and she found herself kissing him back with an urgency she couldn’t seem to suppress. What was happening was perfectly natural for a grown man and woman on their wedding night, but they had come to this marriage as friends from a long time ago. He’d never held her, or danced with her or kissed her, in Switzerland.
When she could take a breath she said, “If you keep this up, our dinner will get cold.”
“What dinner?” His gaze was focused on her mouth.
“The one we didn’t eat. It’s waiting for us out on the terrace of our suite.”
“Was that what you were whispering to Lindsay about?”
She nodded.
“I must say I’d much prefer eating with you alone up here. I like the way my wife thinks.”
Christina was glad he felt that way, because she needed time to get used to him. A meal would give both of them a chance to unwind while they anticipated their wedding night. Now that the moment was here, she didn’t know what to do and felt so awkward she hoped he couldn’t sense it.
* * *
Antonio gave her another swift kiss on the lips and managed to open the door. He walked through the foyer of the semidark suite and made it as far as the bedchamber before putting her down. She eased away far enough to remove the veil and tiara.
He knew she needed some privacy before they did anything else. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He pressed a kiss to her lips. “Don’t start dinner without me.”
“I won’t. Your bags should be in the sitting room.”
“I’ll find them.”
Much as he was reluctant to let her go, he needed to make her more comfortable. After giving her upper arms a quick squeeze, he left the bridal chamber for the other part of the suite. Spotting his bags, he went into the bathroom down the hall to freshen up. It was a relief to discard his sash and ceremonial dress jacket. This was a brand-new experience for both of them. Tonight he wanted to do everything right for her.
Hoping he’d given her enough time, he left the bathroom and started back to the bridal suite. He’d undone his shirt at the neck and rolled his sleeves up to the elbows.
Against the darkened sky, the candles flickering from the terrace table bathed Christina in soft light. As she leaned over in her exquisite wedding dress to pour their wine, he noticed the glory of her midlength hair where the strands of gold gleamed among the red. It looked so thick and sleek he longed to run his hands through it.
She must have sensed his presence and gave him a sideward glance. Again the candles flickered, turning her eyes to a shimmery silver. His bride had come to this earth with her own unique color scheme, one that resonated with him in ways he hadn’t noticed at the age of eighteen. His fifteen-year-old sister and her friend had been too young for him to appreciate the sight he was being treated to tonight.
Between her classic features with those high cheekbones and passionate red mouth, the blood was pounding in his veins. His gaze fell lower to the feminine outline of her body in her gown. While they’d danced, she filled his arms in all the right places and was the perfect height for him.
Her choice of wedding gown had pleased him immensely. She looked demure, but her coloring added the dash of sensuality he’d noticed the first moment he saw her in the chapel.
Christina might not have been aware of it, but he’d watched the males in the crowd admiring her all evening long.
For the first time he wondered how many men she’d known who’d more than admired her. Though it was a little late to question what her love life had been like prior to the actual preparations for their wedding, he couldn’t help but wonder. He felt as if he were swimming in waters over his head.
Her eyes played over him as he moved toward her. He liked the way she was looking at him. When she reached for her wineglass, he picked up his. “This wine comes from the Brunello grapes grown in this vineyard.”
Antonio swirled it around in his glass. “That’s very fitting. I’m sure it will be delicious. A toast to my wife, who has already made my life infinitely richer by simply agreeing to marry me. Salud!” He touched his glass to hers before they both drank some.
She unexpectedly raised her glass again and touched his. “To my husband. You never let your sister down or betrayed her trust. Because of that you’ve won mine. To you, Antonio. Salud! You’ll make the finest king our country has ever known.”
“If that happens, it’s because you’re at my side.” His throat swelled with emotion, making it difficult to swallow his second taste of the fruity wine.
“Shall we sit down to eat? I’m sure you’re as ravenous as I am.” She seated herself before he could help her.
They both tucked in to the heavenly food. She ate with an appetite. He liked that. Most women of his acquaintance ate rabbit food—whether to impress him or not—but not Christina. There was nothing fake about her. That was what impressed him.
When she lifted her eyes to him he said, “The little speech you gave in front of the palazzo blew me away.”
“It did?”
“How could it not? I thought no other man could be luckier than I am to have you for my wife.”
“I feel the same way about you.”
“Christina—I know I’ve put you in an impossible situation.”
“You don’t have to say anything, Antonio. I understand. That’s behind us now.”
“No, it isn’t. Not until I tell you why.”
She had hold of her wineglass stem, but she didn’t lift it to her lips while she waited for his explanation. Looking at her right now, he didn’t think he’d ever seen so beautiful a woman.
“In a word, I was afraid.”
Her delicate eyebrows frowned. “Of what?”
“That once I was in Africa where we could really be alone, you might tell me the engagement was off and send me packing.”
She sounded aghast and let go of the glass to put a hand to her throat. “I would never have done that to you.”
“Then you’re a woman in a million. Who else would have sacrificed her personal happiness for the greater good of someone, something else?”
“Our circumstances were very unusual, but I am happy.”
He shook his head. “You don’t need to pretend with me. This is truth time. I did something terribly selfish to ask you to marry me.”
A pained look entered her eyes. “Is this your way of telling me you wish we hadn’t gone through with the wedding?”
“No, Christina, no—” He reached across the table and grasped both her hands. “I’m just thankful you consented to be my bride. If you’ll let me, I’d like us to start over again. Through Elena we’ve been friends for years, but you and I don’t know each other. I want to get to know all about you. What are the things you love to do? What are the things you hope to do?”
Her silvery gaze enveloped him. “Besides grow old with you?”
“Yes. I’d like to learn it all.”
“I’m a pretty normal woman, Antonio. I like reading books and eating chocolate. I like spending time with my friends, especially your sister. I love Africa and the time I spent there helping others. But I suppose my greatest wish would be to have a family of my own. When I first visited the Kikuyu villages with all the adorable children, I hungered for a child of my own. How do you feel about children?”
“I want them too, Christina.”
“But I want to take care of them myself. Even if I’ll be queen, I want to be their mother in the truest sense of the word.”
“So you don’t want to send them away to boarding school?”
“Why? It doesn’t make sense to me that if you have a child, you would send it away as soon as possible.”
He released her hands. “You’re talking about yourself.”
“Yes.”
He saw her eyes glaze over.
“I wanted my mother and father during my growing-up years. If you and I have a baby, would you want it to leave us before it was time to let him or her go? Did you like being sent away to boarding school?”
“I didn’t have a choice.”
“But did you like it?”
“No. I’ve never admitted that out loud.”
“Neither did Elena.”
“I know.”
“But we’ll be the parents,” Christina said, then added in an anxious tone, “Will our son have a choice? You say you want to know all about me. If you tell me our children will have to leave home before I’m ready to see them go, I couldn’t bear it. Why have them at all?”
Antonio got out of the chair and went around to hunker down beside her. He grasped the hand closest to him. “Look at me.” She finally did his bidding. “I was wrong not to come to Africa. We did need time to talk about all these things so I could reassure you.”
He heard her heavy sigh before she spoke. “I’m sorry I’ve turned this beautiful night into something else. Forgive me.”
“There’s nothing to forgive. You have my word that we’ll keep any children we have with us for as long as they want to be with us. The only time they’ll have a nanny is if you need to attend a royal function with me.”
Her eyes lit up again. “Honest? Is that a promise?”
He could deny her nothing. “I swear it.”
“Oh, Antonio. You’ve made me so happy.”
To crush her in his arms was all he had on his mind, but he wanted to give her time and feel comfortable with him. “I was afraid you were going to tell me that you wanted to live in Africa part of the year.”
“My life is with you, but I’d love it if we took some trips there together one day. Maybe when our children are old enough to enjoy the animal life? But we’ve been talking about me. What is one of your dreams?”
“I’m a pretty normal man too. I want a family. I want to be a success at what I do. Because I’ll be king, I want to change the country’s impression of a monarchy that has shown a breakdown in the old values.”
“Like what for instance?”
“The excess spending for one. There are so many areas that need change. But I’m boring you.”
“Never.”
“Spoken like my queen already.” He got to his feet and drew her over to the terrace railing with him. He looked out over the peaceful Tuscan landscape. His pulse throbbed with new life. He wasn’t the same man who’d slipped the brooch into the bedchamber earlier in the day.
If he had to describe his feelings at this minute, he was excited for what was to come. When he’d anticipated his wedding weeks ago, he didn’t count on being thrilled by this woman who surprised him at every turn. He no longer felt trapped.
Things were going so well he didn’t dare make the wrong move until she was ready for the physical side of their marriage. For them to get through the wedding without problems when they were virtual strangers led him to believe they could turn their marriage into something strong, maybe even wonderful given enough time.
He already felt strong feelings for her, which surprised him. They’d discussed one crucial element concerning their marriage by talking about the children they would have. But as near to each other as they were physically right now, they were still worlds apart.
“Christina?” He turned to her and cupped her face in his hands. “Tonight I’m happier than any man has a right to be.” He lowered his head and closed his mouth over hers. The taste and feel of her set his pulse racing. “You’re the most wonderful thing to come into my life.”
Antonio pressed kisses over every feature. “I need to get closer to you. Would you like me to undo the buttons at the back of your wedding dress before I change?”
He saw a little nerve jump at the base of her throat. His bride was nervous. That was his fault for not visiting her and letting her get comfortable with him.
“Yes, please.”
She turned, reminding him of a modest young maiden. It brought out his tenderest feelings as he began undoing them from the top of her neckline to the bottom, which ran below her waistline. His fingers brushed her warm skin as he set about freeing her trembling body. Never had he enjoyed a task more.
“A-are you finished?” she stammered.
He smiled to himself. “Not quite.” When he was done, he lifted her hair and kissed the nape of her neck. Her mane felt like silk. “There. You’re free,” he whispered, and turned her around. The sleeves and bodice of her gown were loose. All he had to do…
But he didn’t dare. “I don’t think you have any idea how lovely you are. I want to kiss you, esposa mia. Really kiss you.” He found her trembling mouth and began to devour her. The few kisses they’d shared up to now bore little resemblance to the desire he felt for her as she responded with growing hunger.
He clasped her against him, feeling her heart thundering into his. Antonio had an almost primitive need to make love to her, but not this stand-up kind of loving. He wanted her in his bed and was so enthralled by her he moaned when she unexpectedly tore her lips from his and eased away from him.
“Christina?” He had to catch his breath. “Have I frightened you?”
“No.” She shook her head, clutching her gown to her.
He could tell she was as shocked as he was by what had just happened. He needed to reassure her. “This has been a huge day, especially for you. I’m going to let you go right now. Since we have to be up early to leave on our honeymoon, I’ll bid you buonanotte, bellissima, and make myself a bed on the couch in the sitting room.”
CHAPTER FOUR
CHRISTINA STARED AFTER her new husband, so startled by his sudden departure she could weep. She’d been on fire for him and had been ready to go wherever he led. But in the moment that she’d tried to catch a breath, Antonio left her in a dissatisfied condition.
Was it possible a groom could have nerves like the bride? Confused over what had happened, she blew out the candles and walked to the bedroom. After stepping out of her wedding dress, she laid it over a chair with the veil on top. She put her satin slippers on the floor and placed the tiara on the dresser. They were remnants of the happiest day of her life.
She slipped on a nightgown before brushing her teeth. Then she turned out the lights and got into bed. How could she possibly sleep when her body was throbbing with needs she’d never felt before? He’d awakened a fire in her, but she hadn’t known how to handle it when he told her he’d make a bed on the couch for the night. She hadn’t had the temerity to go after him.
Sleep must have come, but she awakened early and finished her packing. Making use of the time until Antonio joined her, she’d touched up her pedicure and manicure. Her nails were done in a two-toned nude shade that matched everything and did justice to her royal antique-gold wedding band and diamond ring.
Since they’d be flying to Paris and would be the target of the paparazzi, Christina had chosen to wear an elegant-looking white two-piece suit from her new royal trousseau. The jacket with sleeves to the elbow fit at the waist. The high neck was half collared and there were pockets on the jacket as well as the skirt. She wore the brooch above the left pocket.
It was the perfect lightweight summery outfit to wear while walking around the City of Lights. Low-heeled off-white pumps and an off-white jacquard designed clutch bag with gloves completed her ensemble.
She’d worn her hair parted sideways into a high bun with one loose, hanging side longer than the other. Two white sticks for her hair with pearl tips matched her pearl stud earrings. Christina hadn’t worn perfume in Africa in order to avoid attracting insects. Back home now, she used a soap with a delicious flowery scent. Her makeup consisted of a tarte lip tint. She needed no other color.
When she was ready, she walked to the door of the sitting room and knocked. “Antonio? Our breakfast is waiting.”
“Grazie. I’ll be right out.” His deep-timbred male voice curled through her. It sounded an octave lower than usual. He must have barely awakened.
She wandered out to the terrace to wait for him. Her eyes filled with the beauty of the Tuscan countryside. The peaceful scene reminded her of a picture in a storybook where the rows of the vineyard formed perfect lines. All around it the gold and green of the landscape undulated off in the distance dotted with a farmhouse here and a red-roofed villa there.
Too bad she felt anything but peaceful inside.
All of a sudden she sensed she wasn’t alone and turned to discover a clean-shaven Antonio studying her from the doorway wearing a casual summer suit in a tan color with a cream sport shirt unbuttoned at the throat. With his olive skin and rugged features, he was so gorgeous she couldn’t believe she was married to him.
“Buongiorno, esposo mio,” she said softly.
His blue gaze roved over her body from her hair to her heels, missing nothing in between. She’d never felt him look at her that way before, as if she were truly desirable. Her legs went weak because she hadn’t expected that look after he decided not to sleep with her last night. She honestly didn’t know what to expect.
“How are you this morning?” he asked in a husky tone of voice. A small nerve throbbed at the corner of his mouth. What were his emotions after having gone to his own bed last night instead of spending it in hers?
“I’m fine, thank you. I’m excited that we’ll be walking along the Champs-Élysées later on today. Aren’t you?”
A strange smile broke the line of his mouth. “Shall we eat while we talk over our itinerary?” A question instead of an answer. Something was wrong.
He held out a chair for her. When she sat down, his hands molded to her shoulders for a moment. Warmth from his fingers coiled through her body. “As bewitching as you were to this man’s eyes last night, I find the sight of you right now even more beguiling.”
Because of the way he’d been looking at her when no one else was around, she believed he’d meant what he just said. But she hadn’t been beguiling enough to go to bed with her. She decided to accept the compliment graciously instead of throwing it back in his face.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” His hands left her shoulders and he took his place across the table from her. They both started eating the rolls and fruit. After drinking some coffee he said, “How did you sleep?”
“The truth?”
“Always.”
“Probably as poorly as you. I doubt that couch was long enough to accommodate your feet.” She was glad to hear a chuckle come from him. His eyes lit up with amusement. “When everyone sees us, they’ll think we’re sleep-deprived because of a passion-filled wedding night and they’ll be happy to think that a new royal heir could be on the way already. You know that’s what’s on everyone’s mind.”
He flashed her a piercing glance through narrowed lids. “But our business is our own.”
“Of course.”
After eating another roll, he sat back in the chair. “My mother left it to my father to give me some last-minute advice.”
That didn’t surprise Christina. “What did he have to say?”
“It isn’t what they said. It’s what they did.”
“I’m not following you.”
“Read this.” He handed her a note from his suit jacket pocket.
She opened it.
Dear Antonio, your mother and I want you to have the perfect honeymoon. We know you wanted to spend a few days touring Paris and the environs before the coronation next week. But we’ve thought of something much better and it has all been arranged. All you have to do is be ready by eight in the morning. A helicopter will fly you to Genoa, where you’ll take the royal jet to a dream spot for your vacation. It’s a place neither you nor Christina has been to before. As always we remain your devoted parents.
They weren’t going to Paris?
Her pulse raced. She’d thought there would be so much to do there and they’d have time to get to know each other while seeing the sights. Just what kind of dream vacation did his parents have in mind?
To be gone for a whole week together alone— It worried her that in a week’s time he might find out she was unlovable. That old fear never quite went away.
What was Antonio’s reaction to the news? Christina’s first impulse was to tell him she didn’t want to go on any dream vacation. But she couldn’t refuse to do the first thing he was asking of her, especially when it was a wedding present from the king and queen themselves.
“I can hear every thought running through your head, Christina. The look in your eyes is all I need to see to know this is the last thing you expected or wanted. If it’s any help, it’s a surprise to me too. The idea of our honeymoon being scripted by my parents at the taxpayers’ expense is typical of the lavish way they’ve lived their lives and expected me to do the same. If you still want to go to Paris, that’s what we’ll do.”
“And hurt your parents?” It took a courageous man to say that to her. She was touched that he would put her feelings first. Her watch said it was almost eight now. “No, Antonio. We have the rest of our lives to plan our own vacations when we can get away. I don’t want us to start off our marriage by alienating your parents. What difference does it make where we go?”
Something flickered in the recesses of his eyes. “Thank you for saying that. I like it that my new bride is adaptable and sensitive enough not to hurt their feelings. Have you done all your packing?”
“Yes.” It was a good thing Elena had done some shopping with her and had insisted on her buying a couple of bikinis. “You never know when you need beachwear,” her friend had confided. Maybe Elena had known about the location of the vacation spot her parents had planned for them and wanted Christina prepared for any eventuality. “How about you, Antonio?”
“I’m ready as I ever will be.”
“Then I’ll freshen up and meet you downstairs.” She got up from the table and hurried into the bathroom for one last look in the mirror. After applying a new coat of lipstick, she walked into the bedroom and noticed her suitcase was missing. She could count on Lindsay and Louisa to make certain her wedding things were packed and returned to the royal palace in Voti.
All she needed was her purse and gloves. When she left the bridal suite and started down the stairs, she discovered Antonio waiting for her in the foyer of the palazzo.
He stood there looking tall and heartbreakingly handsome. His brilliant blue gaze swept over her in a way that sent her pulse racing. “Will you accuse me of using a platitude to tell you how beautiful you look this morning?”
“Even with bags under my eyes from lack of sleep?” But she smiled as she said it.
“Even then,” he murmured. A tiny smile lifted one corner of his lips. “As you said earlier, any onlookers will speculate on the reason why and consider me the luckiest of men.”
She took the last step, bringing her closer. “You’re good, Antonio. I’ll give you that.”
He cocked his head. “What do you mean?”
“I think you know. Aren’t you afraid all these compliments are going to turn my head?”
The smile disappeared. “If you want to know the truth, I’m afraid they won’t.”
While she stood there confused again and wondering how much truth was behind his statement, Guido, his father’s chief of staff, opened the doors. “Your Highness? Princess Christina?”
Guido had addressed her as Princess. She’d better get used to the title, but the appellation was still foreign to her.
“If you’re both ready, your cases are stowed in the limousine. Your helicopter is waiting in Monte Calanetti to fly you to Genoa.”
“Grazie, Guido. We’re coming.”
She preceded Antonio out to the smoked-glass black limousine with the royal crest on the hood ornament. Guido held the rear door open for her so she could climb in, then shut the door. Antonio went around the other side and got in, shutting the door behind him. He slid close to her while they both attached their seat belts.
“This is nice,” he murmured, and grasped her hand. “I’m excited to be going off on a trip with my new wife. I only wish I knew where.”
She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. “Your sister may have given me a hint, but I didn’t realize it at the time.”
“What did she say?”
“She made sure I bought some bathing suits when we went shopping. Did you pack one?”
“I’m sure mine is in my case somewhere.”
“Do you think Hawaii or the Caribbean? I’ve never been to either destination.”
“I have.” He released her hand long enough to pull the note from his pocket. “According to this, it’s someplace where neither of us has been before.”
“That’s right. I forgot.”
“Our parents probably collaborated. It ought to be interesting.”
“I agree. From what Elena has told me, you’ve been all over the world.”
He smiled. “Let’s put it this way. I’ve traveled over many countries without ever landing.”
Christina returned his smile. She’d taken many helicopter trips with Marusha into the more inaccessible areas of Kenya’s forested interior, so she was no stranger to the sensation of liftoff or landing. Before she knew it, they’d arrived on the outskirts of the village where their helicopter was waiting.
Antonio helped her out of the limo into one of the rear seats of the helicopter. He climbed in next to her while Guido placed their cases inside, then got in the copilot’s seat for the short flight to Genoa. Passing over the Tuscan countryside was a constant delight.
Once they boarded the royal jet with its insignia in huge gold lettering, Christina was introduced to the pilot and copilot before being given a tour. She was struck by the staggering opulence inside and out. To her mind, the platinum curving couches, mirrored ceilings and ornate bathroom were out-of-this-world outrageous.
With an office, a gourmet kitchen and two bedrooms, all extravagant to the point of being ridiculous, she imagined the plane that contained a cockpit meant for the emperor of the universe must have cost in the region of millions upon millions of dollars.
Antonio must have been watching her, because he said in a quiet voice, “Is there any question in your mind why our country is outraged by the unnecessary spending of my own parents? Papa bought this off an oil-rich sheik. When I’m king, I have every intention of selling it to the highest bidder and using the money to bolster Halencia’s economy and put more funds in your charity foundation.”
When she thought of the relief that money could bring to the Kikuyu people, she wanted to throw her arms around his neck in joy, but she didn’t dare with Guido and the steward in hearing distance.
After they sat down on one of the couches, Guido made a surprising announcement. “This is where I leave you, Your Highnesses. When you reach your destination, you’ll be met and taken to your vacation paradise. After the plane lands, you’ll be flown in a helicopter to your own private paradise. There’ll be no phone, television or internet service there.”
What?
While she sat there stunned, she could tell by the lines around his mouth that Antonio wasn’t amused either. “Guido? You’ve gotten us this far, but I refuse to travel any farther until you tell me where we’re going.”
“I suppose it couldn’t hurt to say that you’ll be arriving on the other side of the world in approximately twenty-one hours from now.”
“That’s not much help,” Antonio said in a clipped voice.
“I’m only following the king’s orders. Is there anything I can do for you before I leave?”
Antonio turned to her. “How about you, Christina?”
She had compassion for Guido, who was loyal to his king first. “I don’t need anything. Thank you for everything you’ve done.”
“You’re welcome. Enjoy your honeymoon.” He bowed to Antonio before leaving the plane.
In a few minutes the engines screamed to life and the fasten-seat-belts sign flashed on. Before long the jet headed into the sun. Once they’d achieved cruising speed, they got up from the couch and moved to sit in the lavish dining area where the steward served them a fabulous lunch.
“Don’t be upset with Guido. It’s obvious your parents’ big surprise is important to him and to them.”
One eyebrow lifted. “Twenty-one hours one way takes a lot of fuel. Round-trip means thousands more dollars being paid out from the public coffers. It isn’t right.”
She sat back while she sipped her coffee. “I agree, and I admire your desire to change the dynamics of the L’Accardi family’s spending habits. But for now, why don’t we decide to be Jack and Jill, two normal people who got married on a whim, and have just been given a windfall from their oil-rich uncle in Texas who wants to make us happy.”
“Oil?”
“Why not? When we return to civilization, that’s the time to start trimming the budget.”
When she didn’t think it was possible, he chuckled. “Jack and Jill, eh?”
She nodded. “One of the American girls from Texas at the boarding school had the name Jill, and her brother’s name was Jack.”
By now his eyes were smiling. “I’ll go along with that idea. What do you say we go to one of the bedrooms and watch a movie where we can be comfortable?”
Each bedroom had a built-in theater. She wiped her mouth with a napkin. “I’ll find my suitcase and change my clothes.”
He reached across the table and grasped her hand. “I’m sorry you’re not able to show off that lovely white outfit in Paris.”
A warm smile broke out on her face. “Don’t be.” She wouldn’t forget the way he’d stared at her when he walked out on the terrace earlier that morning. Christina had seen a glint of genuine male appreciation in his eyes that brought her great pleasure. “We’ll do Paris one of these days.”
Feeling his gaze on her retreating back, she walked through the compartment and found the bedroom where both their cases had been placed. She took hers and crossed the hall into the other bedroom.
After putting it on the queen-size bed, she found a pair of lightweight pants in dusky blue and a filmy long-sleeved shirt with a floral pattern of light and dark blues combined with pink. It draped beautifully against her body to the hips.
The white suit went in the closet before she slipped into her casual clothes and put on bone-colored leather sandals. After removing the pearl tipped sticks from her hair, she exchanged the pearl studs for gold earrings mounted with star-shaped blue sapphire stones. As she was applying a fresh coat of lipstick, she heard a knock on the door.
“Antonio?”
He opened it but didn’t enter. “Come on over to the other bedroom when you’re ready.”
Her heart started to thud. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
* * *
Antonio had changed into jeans and a sport shirt. Normally he would have put on the bottoms of a pair of sweats and nothing else for the twenty-one-hour flight. But out of consideration for Christina, he needed to make his way carefully for this journey into the unknown. Their honeymoon was in the process of becoming a fait accompli.
He’d experienced two heart attacks already: one at the altar when his fiancée appeared in her white wedding dress and lace veil. The other attack happened this morning when he first saw her on the terrace ready for their trip to Paris wearing a stunning white outfit. When he heard her call out his name just now, he should have known to brace himself for the third attack.
“Enter if you dare,” he teased. Antonio had stretched out on the bed with his head and back propped against the headboard using a pillow for a buffer.
“Ready or not,” she countered, and came into the room. The incredibly beautiful woman dressed in blue appeared, and the sight almost caused him to drop the remote. With her shiny hair, she lit up any room she entered. How could he have ignored her for so long? The few phone calls and visits to her had been made out of duty. The busy life he’d been leading in California had included hard work and one certain woman when he had the time.
Thoughts of his future marriage for the good of the country had only played on the edge of his consciousness, as did the woman who’d been thousands of miles away in Kenya. He couldn’t go back and fix things, but he could shower her with attention now. They didn’t know each other well yet, but had made a start last night when their passion ignited.
Antonio recognized that he needed to treat her the way he would any beautiful woman he’d just met and wanted to get to know much better. He patted her side of the bed. “Come and join me. We have a choice of five films without my having to move from this spot.”
She laughed and pulled a pillow out from under the quilt. The next thing he knew she’d thrown it at the foot of the bed and lain down on her stomach so she could watch the screen located on the other side of the bedroom. “Why don’t you start the one you’d like to see without telling me what it is?” she said over her shoulder.
Christina made an amazing sight with those long legs lying enticingly close to him. “What if you don’t like it?”
“I like all kinds of movies and will watch it because I want to know what makes my husband tick.”
His heart skipped a beat. “You took the words out of my mouth.” He clicked to the disk featuring a Neapolitan Mafia gangster film. “I only saw part of this when it first came out.”
“I’m sure I haven’t seen it. Italian films are hard to come by when you’re out in the bush. This is fun!”
He found it more than fun to be watching it with the woman he’d just married. She made the usual moans and groans throughout. When it concluded she turned on her side and propped her head to look back at him. “I heard that the Camorra Mafia from Naples was the inspiration for that film. Were there really a hundred gangs, do you think?”
“I do.”
“Did any cross the water into our country?”
“Three families that we know of.”
“Do they still exist?”
“Yes, but were given Halencian citizenship at a time when our borders were more porous. They’re no longer a problem. What I’m concerned about is creating high-tech jobs. Tourism and agriculture alone aren’t going to sustain our growing population. I have many plans and have been laying the groundwork to establish software companies and a robotics plant, all of which can operate here to build Halencian industry.”
“So that’s what you’ve been doing in San Francisco all these years. No wonder you didn’t come home often.”
“Are you accusing me of being a workaholic?”
Her eyelids narrowed. “Are you?”
“I make time to play.”
“Since I won’t be able to go to sleep for a long time, what can I do for you, my husband?”
“How about reading to me?”
The question pleased her no end. “You’d like that?”
“I saw a book in your suitcase. Have you read it already?”
“I’m in the middle of it.”
“What’s it called?”
“Cry, the Beloved Country by Alan Paton. He wrote about South Africa and the breakdown of the tribal system. It’s not the part of Africa I know, but it’s so wonderful I’m compelled to finish the book.”
“I never got around to reading it,” he said.
“Tell you what. I’ll read you the blurb on the flyleaf. If it interests you, I’ll read from the beginning until you fall asleep.”
“I’m surprised you don’t carry a Kindle with you. Aren’t physical books heavy to carry when traveling?”
“They can be, but I really like to hold a book in my hands. They’re like an old friend I can see peeking at me from the bookshelf, teasing me to come and read again.”
“I’ve decided you’re a Renaissance woman, Christina.”
“That’s a curious word.”
“It really describes you. You’re a very intelligent woman. I see in you a revival of vigor and an interest in life that escapes most people. You’re more intriguing than you know.”
If she was intriguing, that was something. “When did you discover that?” she asked without looking at him.
“It happened when you were just fifteen. I drove you and Elena to an old monastery in the woods above Lake Geneva. When we went inside, you were able to translate all the Latin inscriptions in those glass cases. I detested Latin and at eighteen I still needed a tutor for it. To hear you translating for us, I was so stunned at your expertise, it left me close to speechless. Do you remember that time?”
He remembered that? It caused her pulse to pick up speed. “Yes. I was showing off to you so you wouldn’t think that your sister was spending time with a complete numbskull. My mother hated it that I was such a bookworm and would rather read than go to tea with a bunch of girls who only talked about boys and clothes.”
“This conversation is getting interesting. When did you first become interested in boys?”
“Actually I was crazy about them at a very early age.” Pictures of Prince Antonio and Princess Elena were constantly in the news. From the time she was about eight, she always liked to see photos of the famous brother and sister in the newspaper accompanying their family on a ski trip or some such thing.
He was the country’s darling. By the time she met him in person, she’d already developed a crush on him that only grew after being with him. Of course all the silliness ended when she left Montreux and had new experiences in Africa. Once in a while she and Marusha would see him in the news, but until Elena’s brush with the law he’d been as distant to her as another galaxy.
Antonio broke into laughter. “The secret life of Christina Rose. How scandalous.”
She chuckled. “Marusha had plenty to tell me about tribal mating rituals of the Kikuyu. In fact, she kept me and Elena royally entertained most nights after lights went out. We’d stay up half the night talking. She had a crush on this security guard who was guarding a VIP at the Montreux Palace Hotel.
“You know how beautiful Marusha is. Well, we’d walk past him and she’d say things to him to capture his interest. He never spoke, but his eyes always watched her. He was tall, maybe six foot five, and he kept his arms folded. He was the most impressive figure I ever saw and I think he was the reason she could handle being in Montreux when she’d rather be home in Africa.”
Laughter continued to rumble out of Antonio.
“Your sister had other interests. There was a drummer in the band that played at this one disco we were ordered not to visit. He was crazy about her and kept making dates with her. She only kept one of them. It was through him she met other guys, the kind she finally ended up with who got thrown in jail for drugs.”
“Let’s be thankful she has grown up now, but don’t stop talking,” Antonio murmured. “I could listen to you all night. What masculine interest did you have?”
Christina didn’t dare tell him that there was no male to match Antonio. His image was the one she’d always carried in the back of her mind. “Oh… I always loved men in the old Italian movies. You know, Franco Nero, Marcello Mastroianni, Vittorio De Sica.”
“No Halencian actors?”
“No. I’ve liked a couple of British actors too. Rufus Sewell…ooh-la-la.” She grinned. “Now, there is a male to die for! So, which actress did it for you?”
“That would be difficult to answer.”
“You don’t play fair. You manage to get a lot of information out of me, but I ask you one question and suddenly you play possum.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you play dead like a possum when you don’t want to reveal yourself. The possum does it for protection. It’s a very funny American expression and it describes you right now. What are you hiding from? Is the truth too scary for you?”
“Have a heart, Christina. I’m not nearly so terrible a womanizer as some of the tabloids have made me out to be. They’re mostly lies.”
“That’s all right. You just keep telling yourself that. When I married you I forgave you for everything. But I’ve talked your ear off, so excuse me for a minute.”
She hurried into the other bedroom and grabbed the book from the table, and then she returned to Antonio. “Are you still in the mood to be read to, or are you ready to confess your sins?”
“Yes and no.”
He was hilarious.
“All right, then. Here’s the quote from it. ‘Cry, the beloved country, for the unborn child that is the inheritor of our fear.’” She read the rest.
A long silence ensued before Antonio murmured, “That’s very moving. Tell me something honestly. Are you going to miss Africa too much?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve spent ten years of your life there. So many memories and friends you’ve made.”
“Well, I’m hoping that from time to time I’ll be able to fly to Nairobi to keep watch over the foundation, which I plan to continue with your permission.”
“There’s no question about that.”
Good. “But our marriage is my first priority, and your needs come first and always will with me.”
“You’re wonderful, Christina, but that isn’t what I asked, exactly. Did you leave your heart there?”
“Certainly a part of it, but I could ask you the same thing. Do you feel a strong tug when you think of San Francisco and the years you spent there?”
“I’d be a liar if I didn’t say yes.”
“I didn’t expect you to say anything else. As for me, I’ve decided I have two homes. One there, where I’ve always been comfortable, and now the new one with you. I see them both being compatible. When you long for San Francisco and want to do business there, I’ll understand.”
“You’d love it there. I want to take you with me and show you around.”
He couldn’t have said anything to thrill her more. “And maybe you can fly to Africa with me for a little break from royal business.”
“We’ll make it happen.”
She studied him for a long time. “Is there a woman you had to leave who’s missing you right now? Maybe I should rephrase that. Is there someone you’re missing horribly?”
Antonio should have seen these questions coming, particularly since he hadn’t slept with her last night. “I haven’t been a monk. What about you?”
A quick smile appeared. Her appeal was growing on him like mad. “I’m no nun.”
For some odd reason he didn’t like hearing that.
You hypocrite, Antonio. Did you want a bride as pure as the driven snow? Did you really expect her to give up men while she waited four years for you to decide when to claim her for your wife?
“Who was he?” His parents’ affairs had jaded him.
“A doctor who’d come to Kenya to perform plastic surgery on some of the native children. Once I came back to Africa with the engagement ring on my finger, he left for England three days later.”
“I kept you waiting four years,” Antonio muttered in self-disgust.
A frown marred her features. “Antonio, none of that matters. I’m your wife! But you still haven’t answered my question. Is there a woman who became of vital importance to you before you had to fly home to get married?”
He got off the bed. “The only woman of importance was one I got involved with before our engagement, Christina.”
“Then you’ve known her a long time. If there’d been no engagement, would you have married her?”
“That’s hard to say. I might have if I’d decided to turn my back on my family and wanted to stay in California for the rest of my life. But when your call came telling me about Elena’s problems and I talked to her, I realized how binding those family ties really are right from the cradle.”
“I know that all too well,” she whispered. Christina had obviously been talking about the relationship with her parents.
“The accident of my being born to a king and queen set me on a particular path. To marry a foreigner and deviate from it might bring me short-term pleasure. But I feared I’d end up living a lifetime of regret.”
She shook her head. “How hard for both of you.”
Her sincerity rang so true he felt it reach his bones. “Though I continued to see her after the engagement party, nothing was the same because we knew there would have to be an end. We soon said goodbye to each other.
“In a way it was a relief because to go on seeing her would not only have made a travesty of our engagement, but the situation was totally unfair to her and you. My sources at the palace confirmed that the country was suffering and there were plans afoot to abolish the monarchy. I knew it was only a matter of time before—”
“Before you had to come home and marry me to save the throne,” she broke in. “I get it.”
“Christina—” He approached her and grasped her hands. “Do you think it’s possible for us to forget the past? You know what I mean. When I said my vows in the chapel, I meant what I said. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life. Can you still make that same commitment to me after knowing what I’ve told you?”
Her marvelous eyes filled with tears. “Oh, Antonio, I want you to know that when I made my vows at the altar, I was running on faith. Now that faith has been strengthened by what you’ve just admitted to me. If we have total honesty between us, then there’s nothing to prevent us from trying to make this marriage work. You’ve always been the most handsome man I’ve ever known, so my attraction to you isn’t a problem.”
He kissed her fingers. “Can you forgive me for staying away from you before the wedding?”
“We’ve already had this discussion.”
He slid his hands to her upper arms. “No woman but an angel like you would have sacrificed everything to enter into an engagement that didn’t consider your own personal feelings in any way, shape or form. Forgive me, Christina. I don’t like the man I was. I can only hope to become the man you’re happy to be married to.”
Her eyes roved over his features. “I liked the man you were. That man loved his sister enough to save her and their family from horrible embarrassment and scandal. She wasn’t just any sister. She was the princess of Halencia, my friend. I loved you for loving her enough to help her.
“You have no idea what she did for me. She was the only person in my world besides my great-aunt Sofia who was good to me. Elena was the person I cried to every time I was hurt by my parents, especially my father, who wished I’d been born a boy.” The tears trickled down her flushed cheeks.
Antonio sucked in his breath. “Grazie a Dio, you’re exactly who you are.” He started kissing the tears away. When he reached her mouth he couldn’t stop himself from covering it with his own. The taste of her excited him. Without her wedding dress on, he could draw her close and feel the contours of her beautiful body through the thin fabric of her shirt. Her fragrance worked like an aphrodisiac on his senses, which had come alive.
“Bellissima.”
CHAPTER FIVE
THE FIRST TIME Christina had heard Antonio use the word bellissima, he’d said it in a teasing jest outside the door of the bridal suite. Just now he’d said it because she could sense his physical desire for her. After last night, there was no mistaking their attraction to each other. But she needed to use her head and not get swept away by passion until they’d spent more time together.
He’d wanted to put off making love to her last night. She was glad of it now. They did need more time to explore each other’s minds first. Antonio might have walked away from the love of his life in San Francisco, but that didn’t mean the memories didn’t linger.
Christina could make love with him and pretend all was well, but she knew that until she held a place in his heart, then making love wouldn’t have the same meaning for either of them. She wanted their first time to happen when it was right.
As soon as he lifted his mouth, she eased out of his arms. Avoiding his gaze she said, “I’m going to freshen up before dinner. Where do you want to eat?”
“How about the other bedroom? There’ll be other films to pick from. Your choice. I’ll tell the steward to bring it in ten minutes.”
“Good. After our fabulous lunch, I can’t believe I’m hungry again.”
When he didn’t respond, she left him to use the restroom. Some strands of her hair had come loose. It was smarter to just undo it and brush it out. Before he brought their dinner, she pulled out the pillows and propped them against the headboard. After taking off her sandals, she reached for the remote and got up on the bed. Before long Antonio walked in carrying a tray.
“Put it here between us.” She patted the center of the bed.
“The steward still won’t breathe a word of where we’re going.” He put the tray down. Sandwiches and salad.
“Loyal to the end.” She smiled at him. “In the meantime this looks good.”
“I think so too.” He joined her on the bed and they began to eat.
“Do you mind if we talk? We haven’t discussed how we’re going to live. In the fairy tales the prince takes his bride to his kingdom and they live happily ever after, but we never get to see how they live.”
He smiled. “I have my own home in one wing of the palace. Our bedroom and living room overlook the Mediterranean. It’s totally private and will be our home. My office is on the main floor adjoining my father’s. My parents have their own suite. You’ve already visited Elena in her suite, which is in the other wing. But we’re far enough apart to lead separate lives.”
She poured them both more coffee, then sat back to drink hers. “Is it going to feel terribly strange bringing a wife into your world?”
He finished off the rest of his sandwich. “I thought it would. In fact, I couldn’t comprehend it. But after being with you, I’ll feel strange if you’re not with me. I’ve discovered that I’ve slipped into the husband role faster than I would have thought and I’m enjoying every minute of it.”
Christina studied him for a moment. “Today I feel like we’re beginning to get to know each other and aren’t afraid to be ourselves. That was my greatest fear, that you’d be different from the man I knew as Elena’s brother. I’ve worried that in living with the man you’ve become, I’d feel invisible walls that kept us strangers. But I don’t feel that way at all when I’m around you.”
“That’s good to hear. I have no idea if I’m easy to live with, Christina, and beg your forgiveness ahead of time.”
A gentle laugh escaped her lips. “That goes for me too. So far I have no complaints. I hope you don’t mind if I ask you a few more questions.”
“Why would I mind? This is all new. You can ask me anything.”
She put down her empty coffee cup. “Is Guido going to be your chief of staff when you take over?”
“At first, yes. But he’s been loyal to my father for years and when he sees how I intend to rule the country, he may have trouble supporting me.”
As he was lying in bed, he’d worried about how everything would go while he was away on his honeymoon. If something went wrong before the coronation, he wouldn’t be there to smooth things over. His father’s note said no phone, no TV or internet while they were on vacation. He’d never been without those things and couldn’t comprehend it at the time.
“I’ll support you, Antonio. I believe in the changes you’re going to make.”
He heard the fervor in her voice and smiled at her. She was too good to be true. “If things get bad, how would you like to be my new chief of staff?”
Christina broke into laughter. “Now, there’s a thought. The media will claim that Princess Christina is running the show.”
“Better you than anyone else I can think of. But seriously, let’s not worry about the future of the monarchy today. Look—” He sat forward. “I know everything will be strange at first.”
“Elena said your mother has her own personal maid. I don’t want one, Antonio. I find it absurd to ask someone to fetch and carry when I’m perfectly capable of doing those things myself. And I’d like to cook for you, go shopping at the markets. I can balance homemaking with the time spent at the charity foundation office in town.”
The more she talked, the more he liked the sound of it. “We’re on the same wavelength. All the years I lived in the States I did most things myself and prefer it, so I get where you’re coming from. We’ll make this work.”
Her silvery eyes glistened with unshed tears. “Thank you for being so understanding.” When she spoke, her heart was in her eyes and it touched a part of his soul.
“Thank you for marrying me.” He meant it with all his heart.
A shadow crossed over her face. “Antonio—if I’d told you I didn’t want to get married when you called, what do you think you would have done?”
“I don’t know. What saddens me is that you weren’t sure I’d follow through and marry you. Christina, I swear not to do anything consciously to hurt you or bring you grief. Do you believe that?”
“Of course I do,” she answered in a trembling voice. “Now I’ll stop pestering you and hand you the remote. Here are half a dozen movies. Choose whichever one you want. I’m loving this.
“When we get back to Halencia, I’m afraid everything will change. Elena told me your father’s daily schedule is horrendous, so I consider this time precious to have you all to myself. Tomorrow we’ll reach our destination, so I’m taking advantage of the time to talk to you.”
“You’ve always been so easy to be with, Christina. You still are.” More than ever… He clicked the remote and flipped slowly through the titles so she could have time to choose.
“Stop!” she cried out. “The African Queen in Italian? Half of that film was filmed in the Congo!”
Antonio grinned. “I never saw it.”
“I bet we have Elena to thank for this one.” She smiled. “Trust her to find me a film I’d enjoy. Do you mind if we watch it?”
“Not at all. It will give me a feel for where you’ve lived and worked all these years.”
“I never worked in the Congo. The Kikuyu tribe lives on the central highlands, but it doesn’t matter. The part in the Congo is authentic. Just don’t forget it’s an old, old movie, Antonio.”
He flashed her a smile that turned her heart over. “I like old if it’s good.”
“This is good. I promise.”
Christina settled back to watch the film while she finished her sandwich. She could tell Antonio liked it. He kept asking questions as if he was truly interested. Maybe he was. But if she continued to wonder when his reactions were natural or made up to please her every time he spoke, their marriage didn’t have a hope of succeeding.
“The actress is a redhead like you.”
“The poor thing. She probably suffered a lot as a child.”
“She became a movie star, Christina. It obviously didn’t hurt her.”
He lay back on the bed and slid his hand into her hair splayed on the pillow. He lifted some strands in his fingers. “I love your hair. It gleams like red gold and smells like citrus.”
“My shampoo is called Lemon Orange Peel. When I’m in Africa I have to use a shampoo with no scent so the tsetse flies and mosquitoes won’t zero in on me.”
“You’d be a target all right. Do you love it there so much?”
“Yes.”
“You’re wonderful, you know that?”
Her eyes filled with telltale moisture.
His hand moved to her face. He traced the outline of her jaw with his fingers. “You have flawless skin and a mouth I need to kiss again.” Without asking her permission his lips brushed hers over and over until he coaxed them apart and began drinking deeply.
A moan escaped her throat as she felt herself falling under his spell. He rolled her into his rock-hard body. A myriad of sensations attacked her as she felt him rub her back, urging her closer. With every stroke, her body continued to melt as the heat started building inside her, making her feverish. Antonio was taking her to a place she’d never been before.
She wasn’t cognizant of the fasten-seat-belt sign flashing until the captain’s voice came over the intercom. “We’ve started to experience turbulence. For your safety, you need to come forward and sit until we get through this.”
On a groan Antonio released her, much more in control than she was. “Come on. Let’s go.” He got off the bed and helped her to her feet.
She couldn’t believe how bumpy it had become and clung to him while they made their way out of the bedroom and down the hallway to the couches. Christina had so much trouble fastening her seat belt that Antonio did it for her and then fastened his own.
“It’s going to be all right.” He reached for her hand.
The incident didn’t last long. When the sign went off, she undid her seat belt and got up before Antonio did. “It’s late. If you don’t mind, I’m going to get ready for bed. Last night I hardly slept and now I’m exhausted.”
After he undid his seat belt, he stood up. “You go ahead. I’m going to have a chat with the captain and will see you in the morning.” He put a hand behind her head and pressed a firm kiss to her mouth before releasing her. “Get a good sleep.”
“You too,” she whispered before walking back to the bedroom she’d just left. Her legs felt like mush, but this had nothing to do with the bumpy flight. The kiss he’d just given her was able to reduce her to a trembling bride. A little while ago she’d experienced the kind of passion that would have rendered her witless and breathless given another minute in his arms.
Frightened because she’d almost lost control, she showered and got ready for bed. Once under the covers she had a talk with herself. It was too soon in their marriage for the physical side to take over. She didn’t doubt Antonio’s intentions. He was doing his best to be a considerate husband. There was nothing wrong with that, not at all. But she wanted to know his possession and realized this was what she got for entering into a marriage of convenience.
I don’t want to be his convenient bride.
Christina wanted him to make love to her because he was in love with her and couldn’t live without her. She wanted Antonio in every way a woman wanted her husband. From the age of fifteen she’d been attracted to him. All it had taken was that kiss at the altar to turn her inside out.
What have you done to me, Antonio?
She closed her eyes, reeling from that torturous question until she fell into oblivion. The next time she was aware of her surroundings, her watch indicated she’d slept ten hours. All in all, they’d been flying twenty hours with refueling stops she hadn’t been aware of. That meant they were close to their unknown destination.
If Antonio had come to her in the night, she didn’t know about it. Chances were he’d been exhausted too and needed sleep as much as she did. She threw off the covers and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and arrange her hair back in a French twist.
The more she thought about it, the more she believed they were flying to a beach vacation. After some deliberation, she chose to put on a pair of white pants and toned it with a filmy white top of aqua swirls that looked like sea spray. The short sleeves and round neck made it summery. Once she’d put on lipstick, she packed her bag so it would be ready to carry off the jet.
Antonio must have had the same thoughts, because when she walked through the plane to the dining area, she discovered him dressed in white pants and a white crew-neck shirt with navy blue trim. His virility took her breath.
As she approached, he broke off talking to the steward. “I was just about to come and wake you for breakfast. We’ll be landing pretty soon. I’ve been told we don’t want to miss the view before we touch down.”
“That sounds exciting. How did you sleep?” She sat down at one of the tables.
He took his place opposite her. “I don’t think as well as you.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m a restless sleeper when I travel. When we touched down to refuel, I got out of the jet to stretch my legs. I peeked in on you to see if you wanted some exercise too, but you were out like a light.”
She felt Antonio’s admiring gaze before the steward served them another delicious meal that started off with several types of chilled melon balls in a mint juice. “Mmm. This is awesome.”
“I agree,” he said, still eyeing her face and hair over his cup of cappuccino until she felt a fluttery sensation in her chest.
They ate healthy servings of eggs, bread and jam. If she ate like this for every meal, she’d quickly put on the weight she’d slowly lost over the past year.
The steward came to their table. “The pilot will be addressing you in a minute. When you’re through eating, please take your seats in the front section. He’ll start the descent, allowing you a bird’s-eye view.”
“Thank you,” Antonio said, exchanging a silent glance with her. By tacit agreement, they got up from the table and walked forward to one of the couches, where they sat together and buckled up.
In a minute the fasten-seat-belt sign flashed and they heard the captain over the intercom. “Your Highness? Princess Christina? It’s eleven a.m. Tahitian time.”
“Tahiti—” she blurted in delight, provoking a smile from Antonio who reached for her hand.
“We’ll be landing at the airport built on the island next to Bora Bora. From there you’ll be taken by helicopter to a nearby island that is yours exclusively for the next four days. The sight you’re about to see is one of the most glorious in the world. Start watching out the windows.”
Christina felt the plane begin to descend. Pretty soon she saw a sight that was out of this world. The captain said, “Bora Bora has been described as an emerald set in a sea of turquoise blue with a surrounding necklace of translucent white water.”
“Incredible!” she and Antonio cried at the same time.
“There are dark green islands farther out in the lagoon that face the mountain. This lagoon is three times the size of the land mass.”
“Oh, I can’t believe this beauty is real.” She shook her head. “No wonder sailors from long ago dreamed of reaching Bora Bora.”
“To the southeast you’ll see a coral garden with waters swimming with manta rays, barracudas and sharks. You can watch them at their feeding time.”
She turned to her husband. “I’m not sorry your parents gave us this beautiful gift, Antonio. They couldn’t have planned a more glorious honeymoon retreat for us.”
“You’re right.” He squeezed her hand.
The jet circled lower and before long they touched down. Antonio undid both their seat belts. “I’ll grab our suitcases. What else?”
“My white purse on the dresser.”
He nodded. “I’ll be right back.” His excitement matched hers. They’d come to paradise and couldn’t wait to get out in it.
She walked toward the galley to thank the steward.
“It’s been my pleasure, Princess.”
Antonio caught up to her with her purse. The steward carried their cases to the entrance of the jet where their pilot was waiting. He shook his hand. “Thank you for a flawless flight.”
“It has been an honor for me to serve you and the princess. There’s a helicopter waiting to fly you to your private resort where every need will be met. In four days I’ll be here to fly you back to Halencia. Enjoy your honeymoon.”
She left the jet with Antonio following her and made her way to the helicopter. The pilot, an islander, greeted them warmly and explained they’d be flying to one of those dark green islands in the distance.
Christina sat in one of the backseats. The second Antonio joined her and buckled up, the rotors screamed to life and they lifted off, flying low over the aquamarine water. The pilot spoke to them over the mic.
“Welcome to Tahiti. The resort has heard that the future king and queen of Halencia are our guests. Word has come that you are much beloved, Princess. No one else will disturb your vacation, but you have a staff to wait on you. Ask for anything.”
“Thank you.”
When she looked back at Antonio, he was staring at her. “Do you know everyone who meets you is so charmed by you that you have them eating out of your hand? I noticed it as we were walking down the aisle after the ceremony. All eyes and smiles were focused on you.”
A blush seeped into her cheeks. “A bride is always the center of attention at a wedding. It’s the way of things.”
“But my bride is exceptional and loved by the people already. If I’m to gain any credibility with the country when I’m king, it will be because of you.”
“Thank you, but you don’t need to say things like that to me.”
“Yes, I do.” The sincerity in his voice convinced her.
Before she knew it, the pilot set down the helicopter on a stretch of the purest white beach she’d ever seen. Another man in shorts and T-shirt was there to take their bags.
“Welcome to Bora Bora, Your Highnesses. I’m Manu and will be serving you. If you want anything, it will be at your disposal. With the powerboat you can go where you wish to fish, scuba dive, hike. Anything you want.”
They shook his hand and followed him to their resort. It turned out to be a massive island bungalow of traditional Polynesian design with a vaulted ceiling situated on stilts over their private lagoon of turquoise water. As they walked inside, the living room looked like a sumptuous palace suite with windows on all sides and glass floors throughout to watch the fish.
There were windows on all sides and two different sundecks facing Bora Bora with platforms so they could step off directly into the lagoon.
Outside were oversize chairs and more glass floor panels. Manu showed them the dining room and kitchen with a refrigerator stocked with snacks and drinks. “There’s food here to enjoy inside or to make a picnic. The spacious bathroom has two tubs and walk-in showers.”
They followed him to the fabulous bedroom, also with a vaulted ceiling, where he put down their cases. Then he showed them out to one of the platforms. “The powerboat is ready and filled to capacity to take you where you want. Come with me to the other platform.”
They followed him. “You have your own two-seater kayak, snorkeling equipment, rubber rafts, whatever you want including towels and sunscreen. The lagoon water is eighty degrees and the nighttime temperature is the same.”
Warmer than a bathtub?
Christina marveled that everything you could ever want had been provided. She thanked Elena silently for taking her to buy some swimming suits.
“I’ll be the person waiting on you. Pick up the phone to order your food or when you need clothes washed or ironed. There’s one in the living room and another one in the bedroom. There’s no internet, no television. If there’s an emergency, you call me on the house phone and I’ll take care of it. Can I answer any questions?”
“Not right now.” Antonio shook his hand. “Thank you, Manu.”
After the islander disappeared, she looked around in wonder. “All of this just for us?” she murmured to her husband. “Only a king could afford to pay the resort enough money to keep the world away.”
He chuckled and turned to her. “What do you want to do first?”
“Let’s unpack and then go for a swim. That water is calling to me.”
* * *
Antonio couldn’t help but admit that this had to be the ultimate getaway. His parents had gone over-the-top on this one, but he’d promised Christina they’d enjoy this outrageous luxury and not count the cost.
It didn’t take long to put their things in closets and drawers. Then she disappeared in the bathroom. While she was out of sight he changed into his boxer-style black bathing trunks. Wanting to create a mood, he went into the living room and searched in the entertainment center for the radio.
When he turned it on, he got Tahitian music, exactly what he wanted. There was a switch that said Outside. He flipped it and suddenly they were surrounded with island music that no doubt could be heard out on the beach.
A smiling Christina came hurrying in wearing a lacy peach-colored beach robe over what looked like a darker peach bikini. Her gorgeous long legs took his breath away. “That’s such romantic music, I think I’m dreaming all this.”
“Fun, isn’t it? Let’s go try out the water.”
He opened the door that led to the platform off the living room. She leaned over the railing to look down at the water. “It’s clear as crystal.” When she reached the edge of the platform, she removed her beach coat and put it over the railing.
“Wait, Christina. You need some sunscreen or you’ll pick up a bad sunburn.”
“You’re right.”
“I’ll get it.” He went over to the basket and brought it to her. “I’ll put some on your back and shoulders.”
She turned her back toward him without hesitation. Her skin felt like satin and he loved rubbing the cream over her. The legitimate excuse to touch her made him wish he didn’t have to stop. Summoning all the self-control he could muster, he handed her the tube so she could do the rest herself.
“Thank you,” she said in a shaky voice. “Now it’s my turn to put some on you, although you’re already tanned.”
He longed to feel her hands on him. His pulse throbbed as he felt her spread the cream over his shoulders and back. After putting the tube on the railing, she jumped in the shallow water and shrieked with joy.
“Oh, Antonio— This is divine!” She splashed the water with her hands and laughed in delight before lying back while her legs did the work of keeping her afloat.
One look at her and he couldn’t reach her soon enough. Bathtub was right. The temperature here stayed around eighty day and night. He swam up next to her, infected by her sounds of excitement. With the Polynesian music filling the air, they were like children who’d discovered the fount of pure pleasure.
Together they moved out deeper into the blue lagoon. He swam under and around her. The glimpses of her exquisitely molded body set his heart pounding.
“Look at that darling little sea turtle!”
Spectacular as it was, he would rather look at her. As they trod water, they caught sight of other types of small fish including a clown fish with orange and white stripes. One discovery turned into another. They played and darted through the water for several hours, concocting silly games to identify the fish they saw. Her prowess as a swimmer was going to make this the adventure of a lifetime.
Since there was no one else around, Antonio felt as if they were the last two people on earth…or the first. Adam and Eve?
He loved the idea of it, loved being with her like this where her guard was down. Her sense of fun was already making this trip unforgettable. “What do you say we go back and drink something icy cold while we sunbathe on the lounge chairs?”
“That sounds perfect. I’ll race you back.”
Together they did the crawl. He slowed his pace to stay even with her. When they reached the platform he climbed up first, then helped her. She put on her beach robe and headed for one of the loungers.
“I’ll order some drinks and be right back.”
“No alcohol for me. Even a little wine can give me a headache.”
“Did you suffer from one on our wedding night?”
“No, because I only sipped a little, but I know to be careful.”
That was something he didn’t know. He rarely drank himself and was pleased to learn she didn’t care about it. His parents constantly overindulged.
A few minutes later and Manu appeared with two frosted glasses of juice topped with a flower.
“I could get used to this in a hurry,” Christina commented after they’d given him their order for dinner and were alone again. Antonio handed her some of the brochures from the table in the living room. He looked over one, but would study the rest of them later. Right now he was content to study her and look at the white clouds moving slowly across the sky.
He finished his drink. “It’ll be several hours before dinner, but it’s already late in the day. How would you like to go exploring in the powerboat? We’ll follow the directions in that brochure and make our plans for tomorrow.”
“That’s exactly what I want to do. While we were descending in the plane, I longed to spend more time just to get acquainted with this glorious place.”
A few minutes later they undid the ropes and Antonio idled them out into the lagoon. He reached into one of the lockers. “Here—put this lifesaving belt on.” He handed it to her.
“But the water isn’t that deep.”
“It doesn’t matter. If we got into trouble, you’d be glad of it.”
“I’ll wear it if you wear one too.”
“Nag, nag.” But he smiled as he put one on.
“Now that I think about it, can you imagine the media storm if we had an accident and word got out that the future king and queen of Halencia had almost drowned because they hadn’t been wearing preservers? People would wonder what kind of ruler they had.”
He chuckled. “Point taken. It would never do.”
Off Point Matira they came across a group of huge manta rays. There were spotted and gray rays. Antonio swam near their boat while they watched in fascination.
“We should be marine biologists,” she exclaimed. “Just think, we could come out to places like this and spend all day long for weeks on end.”
Antonio nodded. “Being out here, you can understand the appeal for that kind of work. Are you interested in watching the locals feed the sharks? We’re not far from there.”
“I guess it’s safe or they wouldn’t advertise it, but I think I’ll want to stay in the boat.”
He drove them to the spot where the local divers stood chest deep in the water. Four-and five-foot sharks circled around them to get their food.
“That’s scary to me,” Christina said. “I’ve changed my mind about being a biologist.”
“Instead you’d rather be in Kenya where you can be dragged off by a lion.”
“No—” She grinned at him.
For their last destination they took off and headed for the coral garden, an underwater park southwest of Bora Bora Island. For an hour they were spellbound by the amount of colorful fish and coral. Like an excited child she squealed over the varieties.
“I’m going to take a quick dip before we head back.”
Antonio couldn’t have stopped her. She was too anxious to get closer. Off came her belt and she lowered herself in the water. The sight of her going underwater made him nervous. He watched her like a hawk. To his relief she came back up a few minutes later, but she looked distressed.
“I stepped on something, but I don’t know what.”
Diavolo. “Does it sting?”
“No. It’s just kind of sore on the pad of my foot.”
Antonio leaned over and helped her into the boat. He set her down on the banquette so he could inspect it. “You made contact with a sea urchin, but luckily I only see two spines.” Thank heaven. “They’ll need to come out. Keep your leg on the banquette and I’ll get us back home.” He wrapped the life belt around her, kissed her lips and got behind the wheel.
“Do you think it’s serious?”
“No. I once got a whole foot full of them, but I was fine. Still, we’ll ask the doctor to check you.”
“Oh no—I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“Accidents can happen anytime in the water, as you reminded me.”
The sky was darkening fast. He was glad when they reached their island. After tying up the boat, he undid the life belts and carried her from the deck into their bedroom.
After setting her down on top of the bed, he phoned Manu and asked for a doctor to come. “I’ll get you some ibuprofen after we’ve talked to the doctor.”
“Will you carry me to the bathroom? I need to get out of my suit and into a robe.”
“Of course.” He lifted her in his arms once more and let her hang on to him while he reached for her robe hanging on the door. “Can I help you?”
“I’ll be all right.” He waited until she said she was ready, and then he carried her back to the bed. In another moment he heard Manu’s voice coming from the main entrance. “The doctor is here.”
“Will you show him into the bedroom, Manu?”
Within seconds the two men came in. “Princess Christina? This is Dr. Ulani.”
He brought his bag with him. “Thank you for coming, Doctor. As you can see, my wife stepped on a sea urchin. She’s in pain.”
“Hush, Antonio. It’s not that bad at all. More of a discomfort.”
The native doctor smiled. “Accidents like this happen every day, even to someone like Your Highness. Let me check your foot. I’ll try not to add to your pain.”
Antonio placed a chair for him to sit while he worked on her. Relieved as he was that she was getting medical attention, it suddenly hit him how frightened he’d been when she first surfaced. In very little time she’d become so important to him that he couldn’t bear the thought of anything truly serious being wrong with her.
The doctor opened his bag and proceeded to get rid of the two spines. He put ointment on the sores and a dressing. “You’ll be fine tomorrow. Just make sure you wear some kind of shoe in the water if you’re not snorkeling with fins. I’ll give you a tablet for you to sleep that will kill the pain. Tomorrow if you’re still too sore, take some ibuprofen.”
“Thank you so much. It feels better already.”
“It’s a privilege to help you, Princess.” When he’d finished, he stood up. “Take care, now.”
“I’ll make sure of it,” Antonio muttered. He shouldn’t have let her slip into the water like that. The action had caught him off guard.
“Here’s the pill. Tomorrow you can take off the dressing.”
Antonio walked him out to the living room. “I can’t tell you how grateful I am you came.”
“It is my pleasure to wait on the future king and queen of Halencia. Our people are aware of your presence here and they are delighted. Don’t hesitate to get hold of me through Manu if you are alarmed by anything.”
Manu stood by. “You want your dinner in the bedroom, Your Highness?”
“Yes. Thank you. Will you bring a glass of water so she can take her medicine?”
He nodded and hurried to the kitchen. Antonio headed back to the bedroom. “Christina? It’s my fault you got hurt this evening.”
“Nonsense. I wasn’t thinking. When I saw those fish, I just had to get in closer.”
“Please tell me you’ll give me a heads-up next time before you do a disappearing act.”
His mermaid was resting against the headboard with a sore foot. “I’m sorry to be the one at fault for not having the sense to get in the water prepared. But, Antonio, you don’t have to try to be perfect with someone as imperfect as I am. I did a stupid thing, but the situation really is funny, don’t you think? Your parents planning for every contingency to bring us joy? And I blew it. At least for tonight. Now you have to give me my medicine and be stuck with your ball and chain until morning.”
“Don’t say that! Not ever! I don’t feel that way about you and never could. Promise me!” He sounded truly upset.
“I promise,” she said as Manu appeared with their dinner. Antonio thanked him and put the tray of food on the side of the bed next to her. He handed her the glass of water and the pill. “Take this first.”
After she did his bidding, he sat in the chair the doctor had used and they ate their dinner. He heard her sigh.
“It’s another beautiful night, so balmy. I’d wanted to go walking on the beach with you.”
“We’ll do that tomorrow night. For now, you need to try and fall asleep.”
“You won’t leave me?” Her eyes beseeched him.
“As if I would,” he murmured, experiencing a hard tug of emotion. It came to him that his new wife had become of vital importance to him. “I’ll join you as soon as I change out of my swimming suit.”
“Good. Don’t be long.”
Christina, Christina.
He put the tray on the table and went into the bathroom to change. After putting on a robe, he turned out the lights, then got into bed beside her. The pill must have been powerful, because her eyelids were drooping. Antonio rolled her into him and she let out a deep sigh. Soon she was asleep. Before long, oblivion took over.
Around six in the morning he felt the bed move. She’d gotten up to use the bathroom.
He eyed her through sleep-filled eyes. When she returned he said, “How’s the pain?”
“There’s hardly any at all. I can walk fine as long as I’m careful.”
“That’s wonderful news. Come back to bed and rest that foot some more. It’s still early.”
CHAPTER SIX
CHRISTINA EYED HER HUSBAND, who’d kept a vigil over her all night. She got back in bed, lying on her side so she could watch him sleep. He was such a gorgeous man. Dawn was sneaking into the bedroom with the morning breeze. Through the open windows she could see the unique shape of the mountains on Bora Bora. If she could be anywhere in the world, she wanted to be right here with the man she’d married.
When next she came awake, she found herself the object of Antonio’s blue gaze. She propped her head up with her hand. “How long have you been awake?”
“Long enough to watch my lovely wife. You’ve been sleeping so peacefully.”
Without hesitation he leaned over to kiss her. “Good morning, esposa mia. I dreamed about kissing you all night long.”
“I had the same dream.”
Before she could blink he put his arm around her and kissed her deeply, not letting her go until she had to breathe.
He sighed. “I needed that.”
“I’m pretty sure you need something else after taking care of me all night. I’ll ring Manu to bring our breakfast tray.” She reached for the phone and put in their order. After hanging up, she turned to her husband.
“How did you know?”
“That you’re starving?” she quipped. “I’m hungry too.”
He raised himself up and leaned over her. “You have no idea how beautiful you are, do you? I could eat you up.”
But at that moment Manu appeared at the door. “Shall I put your breakfast on the table?”
“No, Manu,” Antonio said. “I think we’ll have it right here in bed.”
The other man smiled and set it on the end of the bed before making a discreet departure.
She smiled at her husband. “We’re spoiled rotten. You know that.”
He moved to put the tray between them. Christina propped her head with a couple of pillows and bit into a croissant. “If the famous French impressionist Gauguin were here to paint us, he’d entitle it Petit Déjeuner au Lit Tahitien.”
His lips twitched. “Breakfast in a Tahitian bed is far too mundane. I think a more appropriate title would be Le Mari Amoureux.”
The Amorous Husband? Christina laughed to cover the quiver that ran through her. She’d forgotten he’d attended a French/Swiss boarding school too and was fluent in French besides Halencian, Italian, English and Spanish.
“What do you want to do today?”
“I’m up for anything.”
“Honestly?”
“My foot doesn’t hurt and I don’t want us to miss out on anything while we’re here. We don’t have that much time before we have to go back.”
“I don’t want to go back.”
Her pulse raced. “Neither do I.”
“What do you say we take out the kayak and just paddle around for fun?”
“That sounds perfect. I’ll get my suit on and wear a T-shirt so I don’t pick up any more sun on my shoulders.” With a kiss to his jaw, she slid out of bed. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
He’d been worried about that. The need to touch her was growing. A bad case of sunburn could make her feel miserable for several days. Relieved that her foot was healing well, he got excited to think about spending another glorious day with her. It was pure selfishness on his part to want her able to do everything with him waking or sleeping.
There was only one bed, but a number of couches. He had no intention of sleeping on a couch or a sun lounger tonight. He wanted his wife in that oversize bed clinging to him while the scented breeze from Bora Bora wafted through their bedroom.
“Antonio? I’m ready when you are.”
He looked up to see her standing there with a white T-shirt pulled over her suit. “I’m glad you’re wearing your tennis shoes.”
There was no doubt his bride had one of the most beautiful faces and bodies he’d ever seen, starting with her glorious hair. She’d fastened it on top with a clip. He wanted to reach up and pull her down to him, but right now it was important they keep having fun while breaking down walls.
Levering himself out of bed, he hurried to the bathroom to put on his trunks. Then he joined her at the edge of the platform. The Sevylor inflatable plastic kayak had been secured to the post with cords. Once they were undone he reached down to hand her a belt life preserver. While she put hers on, he fastened his.
“I’ll go first.” After getting in the front seat, he held out his hands to her and eased her into the backseat.
“Ooh—” She laughed. “It’s tippy. I’m used to a canoe.”
“You’ll soon get the hang of it.”
They unloosened their oars and started paddling. He led them around in circles to get her used to the motion. Over his shoulder he said, “According to the brochure, there’s no surf here because of the reef across the lagoon. When you’re ready, we’ll head out to that other island in the distance.”
“I can see you’re an old pro at this.”
“During my boarding school days in Lausanne, some friends that my parents didn’t approve of flew home with me on breaks. We’d go kayaking around Halencia on weekends. But as you know, the Mediterranean can be choppy when the wind comes up. This lagoon is like glass in comparison.”
They started paddling together and headed out. “I wonder if I ever saw you out there during the few times I came home from boarding school.”
“I’ve been wondering the same thing myself. Do you believe in destiny, Christina?”
“To be honest, until I received the phone call from you that we were really getting married, I believed that I was meant to—” She broke off abruptly. “Oh, it doesn’t matter what I believed.”
He stopped paddling and turned to look at her. “Tell me. I want to know.”
She shook her head. “If I told you, you’d see me as a pitiful creature who feels sorry for herself.”
“You’re anything but pitiful. I want to know what you were going to say.”
Christina rested her oar. She cast her gaze toward Bora Bora. “My parents didn’t want me, Antonio. They really didn’t. The only genuine love I felt came from my great-aunt Sofia, but I wasn’t her daughter and didn’t see her very often.
“I believed it was my lot always to live on the outside of their lives. This became evident when they didn’t put up a fuss about my working in Africa. I was crushed when they sounded happy about my doing charity work there. They didn’t miss me, not at all. Marusha’s parents have been more like parents to me than anyone.”
Her suffering had to be infinite. “That’s tragic about your parents.”
“I was afraid you’d say that, but I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. They were warmer to me at the wedding, especially Mother. You asked for the truth and I’ve told you. As for believing in destiny, despite my pain, I was happy with my life in Africa and decided I’d probably live there forever. The ability to help other people brought me a lot of peace I hadn’t known before.”
“Until I turned your world upside down,” he bit out in self-deprecation.
“It wasn’t just you, Antonio. Elena had already become family to me. When she got into real trouble, I felt her pain. Like you, she led a life of isolation being royal. I can understand why she took up with guys from my world. In your own way, you and Elena have led a life of loneliness. It’s a strange world you two inhabit and always will be. But I was lucky enough to be the friend Elena let in. If I could have had a sister, I would have wanted her.”
“You’re very perceptive, Christina. I originally went to San Francisco to learn business. It was there I worked with normal people. Zach became a true friend and I enjoyed it so much I didn’t want to go home. My parents’ lifestyle was a personal embarrassment to me. But when I heard of the trouble Elena was in, I couldn’t turn my back on her. Forgive me for using you.”
“By phoning you, I used you too,” Christina came back. “Did you really have a choice to do anything but try to draw the paparazzi’s attention away from her? I was the perfect person to help. After all, we were an unlikely threesome, yet no one knew me or knew about me. What I want to know is, why didn’t you break off our engagement a few years later and ask the woman you loved to marry you?”
His jaw hardened. “I wouldn’t have done that to you.”
“You see what I mean?”
Her sad smile pierced him.
“You tried to be like everyone else, but in the end, the prince in you dominated your will. The princess in Elena let you fall on your sword because you were both born to royalty and knew your duty. She wanted you to be king one day.
“Before I phoned you, did you know she wanted to admit everything to the police and take the blame so there’d be no reflection on you or your family? But I wouldn’t let her. I told her I was going to phone you because I knew you could fix things and you found a way.”
“Which involved you.” His voice throbbed. His emotions hovered near the surface. “Let me ask you a question. Why didn’t you tell me to go to hell when I called you to give you the wedding date? You would have had every right.”
She breathed in deeply. “Because your royal dust had blown on me years before. I’m not a Halencian for nothing. My country means everything to me. The engagement we entered into was very bizarre, but it made a strange kind of sense. In fact, the only kind of sense that would satisfy the people.
“I’m positive it would have been hard for them to accept your marriage to a woman from a different nationality as you pointed out. But if you’d wanted it badly enough, you could have made it happen.”
He eyed her for a moment. “When it came down to it, I didn’t want her badly enough to break my commitment to you.”
“Thank you for saying that. I want you to know I’m not sorry, Antonio.”
His heart skipped a beat. “Do you honestly mean it? Even though it meant ending an important relationship with the doctor you met in Kenya?”
“It wasn’t that important. I didn’t want to break my commitment to you either. You and Elena have trod a treacherous path all your lives. You always will because you were born to the House of L’Accardi.
“Elena and I were friends from the age of fifteen. I knew her sorrows. She bore mine. Her greatest fear was that you might end up living in California one day and giving up the throne so she would have to be queen. That was one of her greatest nightmares.”
Good heavens. So much had gone on that he hadn’t known about behind the scenes because of his selfishness in pursuing his own dream. “I didn’t realize…”
“How could you if she never said anything? At our reception, Elena acted so happy we got married that she could hardly contain herself.” Even though there was still something she seemed to be holding back.
“Her happiness went much deeper than that because it meant she wasn’t going to lose the best friend she’s ever had.”
Christina flashed a full, radiant smile at him, stunning him. “Now she’s got both of us and our threesome can go on forever.”
Forever.
* * *
Antonio turned around and started paddling again. There’d been a time when the thought of being married forever stuck in his throat. But no longer. When they returned to the hut, Manu had served their dinner on the deck.
“Tonight you are eating freshly caught mahimahi with coconut rice and mango salsa.”
“It looks fantastic, Manu.”
After he left them alone Christina said, “They’ve gone all out for us. Now I know the true meaning of being treated like a king.”
His blue eyes glinted with amusement as they sat down to eat.
Christina took her first bite. “The fish is out of this world.”
“This is Bora Bora mahimahi,” he quipped. “We won’t be getting anything this good in Halencia. If I could put off the coronation for a while, I’d like us to stay here for a month at least! I’m thinking our first-year anniversary. What do you say?”
“But we’ll fly commercial. And we’ll stay in a little bungalow over the water and play tourist like everyone else.”
“And climb the mountain and scuba dive. Have you ever been?”
“No.”
“Then you’ve got to take lessons. I’ll go with you.”
“You mean you’ll take time out of your busy day?”
“You’ll need a buddy. I don’t want anyone else buddying up with my wife.”
The possessive tone in his voice thrilled her.
Once dinner was over Christina showered and washed her hair. After toweling it, she used the blow dryer until it swished against her shoulders. She put on a pale lemon-colored nightgown. Her skin had picked up some sun, adding color to her complexion. To her relief her injury was barely noticeable.
Her lamp was the only light on in the room. There were more brochures for her to read on the side table, but she wasn’t ready for bed yet. Antonio had turned on more romantic music. The thought of him made her heart thump out of control. She’d just spent the most heavenly day of her life with the man who was now her husband.
Before long he came into the bedroom wearing a robe. Without a shirt he had an amazing male physique with a dusting of dark hair on his chest. Her mouth went dry just looking at him. When he came closer, she could smell the soap he’d used in the shower. “The night is calling to us. Let’s go out on the deck. I want to dance with you.”
He grasped her hand and they walked out into the balmy night. Christina gasped softly to see millions of stars overhead. “Antonio—have you ever seen the heavens this alive? I just saw a shooting star.”
“We don’t need a telescope when the universe seems so close. It’s even in your eyes. They are shimmering like newly minted silver. Combined with the red gold of your hair, you’re an amazing sight. A new heavenly body to light up this unforgettable night.”
His words overwhelmed her before he wrapped his arms around her and started dancing with her. Not the kind of dancing they did at the reception. This was slow dancing. She melted into him. The night had seduced her. There was a fragrance in the air from the flowers on the deck that intoxicated her. Being held against his hard body like this was pure revelation.
Her womanhood had come alive in his arms. She liked being taller because their bodies fit together. He’d buried his face in her hair. She could feel the warmth of his breath, tantalizing her because she longed to feel his mouth on hers. On their wedding night she’d thought the fantasy was over. How could she have known they would come to this paradise where she was finding rapture beyond her dreams?
“Give me your mouth, Christina,” he murmured. “I’m aching for you.”
She had the same ache and lifted her head. Their mouths met and they kissed for a long time, giving and taking, back and forth. She clung to him, needing the pleasure he gave her with every caress of his hands roaming over her back. When he moved his mouth lower, she moaned as he slowly kissed her neck and throat. Everywhere his lips touched, it brought heat that spread through her body like fire.
Without her realizing it, he’d danced them back inside. Then he swept her into his arms and followed her down on the bed. “I could eat you alive,” he whispered against her lips, and once again Christina was consumed by his kiss, hot with desire. A husband’s desire. She hadn’t known it could be like this.
“Bellissima? Tell me something. Have you ever been to bed with a man?”
The question jolted her. “No. Does my inexperience show so much?”
“Not at all. But I worried that if I’m the first man to make love to you, then I don’t want to rush you into anything. You’re so sweet, Christina. I didn’t need Elena to tell me just how sweet you really are. I want our first time to be everything for you.”
“Everything has been perfect so far,” she whispered, fearing something had to be lacking in her for him to bring it up. When he didn’t say anything, she eased away a little, but he drew her to him with her back resting against his chest.
“I’m glad, but I want to give you time to get used to me. Until you’re truly ready, let’s simply hold each other tonight. If I’d gone to Africa to see you, this is what we would have done. We have the rest of our lives and don’t need to be in a hurry.” He kissed her neck. “This is heavenly, you know? You smell and feel divine to me.”
To be held in his arms was heavenly, but little did he know she was ready! Though she loved him for trying to make their first time perfect, she was dying inside. Still, by his determination to ease her into marriage, it showed a tender side of his nature that proved what a wonderful man she’d married. How many men would care enough about their brides’ feelings to go to these lengths?
“This has been my idea of heaven, Antonio. I can’t wait until tomorrow.” Maybe tomorrow night he’d realize she didn’t want to wait a second longer.
When she awakened the next morning, she discovered her husband fast asleep. They’d slept late. Christina slid out of bed without disturbing him and rushed into the kitchen to phone Manu and order breakfast. Then she showered to get ready for the day.
With that accomplished she put on another bikini. This one had an apple-green flutter top. Both she and Elena had loved the crocheted look of the top and bottom overlying a white lining. It was more modest than many of the suits.
Since they’d probably be out in the water most of the day, she decided the best thing to do with her hair was to sweep it on top and secure it with her tortoiseshell clip. She removed her gold studs and put on a pair of tiny earrings the shape of half-moons in a green that matched her bikini.
Before going in to Antonio, she threw on a lacy white beach jacket that fell to just below her thighs. Now she was ready to greet her husband. But when she entered the bedroom, he’d turned onto his stomach and was still out for the count. Only a sheet covered his lower half. What a fabulous-looking man! She was still pinching herself to believe he was her husband.
He would need a shave, but she loved the shadow on his hard jaw. He looks were so arresting that his state of dress or his grooming didn’t matter. She’d loved the handsome eighteen-year-old prince. But over the years he’d grown into a breathtaking man no woman could be immune to.
While she sat feasting her eyes on him, she heard sounds coming from the kitchen. She got up from the side of the bed and went back to bring him their breakfast tray. She brought it in and put it on the end of the bed.
The aroma of the coffee must have awakened him. He turned on his side and opened his eyes. Between the dark fringe of his lashes, their brilliant blue color stole her breath. Antonio raised himself up on one elbow. “Well, what do we have here? Could it be the nymph from the fountain holding the seashell?”
She loved the imagery. He’d noticed the fountain sculpture in the courtyard in front of the palazzo. “Yes, sire.” His eyes darkened with emotion. “I’m here with your breakfast. Your wife told me you would awaken with a huge appetite.”
“My wife told you that? Her exact words?”
“I never lie.”
“Then will you tell her that spending the day with her yesterday was more than wonderful? But I’ll tell her just how wonderful when we’re alone again today. Those will be words for her ears only.”
Christina couldn’t prevent the blush that rose into her cheeks. “I’ll be happy to do that after I’ve served you your breakfast.” She got up and put the tray in front of him. “Do you wish me to leave? You have only to command me.”
“Then I command you to bring that chair over to the side of the bed and we’ll enjoy this food together.”
She smiled secretly and moved it next to the bed. “Your wife won’t mind?”
He flicked her an all-encompassing gaze. “She might. A woman serving me breakfast who looks as gorgeous as you might worry, so I think we’ll keep this moment to ourselves. How does that sound to you?”
She reached for a roll and bit into it. “You flatter me, sire.”
“I haven’t even started. That’s quite an outfit you’re wearing.”
Christina drank some orange juice and reached for a strip of bacon. “You like it?”
“I can’t keep my eyes off you. Do you serve all the men like that?”
“What men? You’re the only one on this whole island.”
He ate his food in record time. “That’s good because if I found out otherwise, I’d have to confine you to a room in the palace where I have the only key.”
Their conversation was getting sillier and sillier, but she loved it. She loved him.
“What are your plans for today, sire?”
“This and that.”
“Does your wife know about that?”
His eyes narrowed on her mouth. “She’ll find out.”
“I see.” Her heart jumped. “Well, if you’ve finished your breakfast, I’ll take the tray back to the kitchen.”
“Grazie. When you see her, tell her I want her to come to me. Now. I don’t like to be kept waiting.”
She trembled as she reached for the tray. “Si, Your Highness.”
* * *
The second his wife left the bedroom on those long, shapely legs, Antonio headed for the shower and freshened up. Since she’d already put on her bikini, he pulled on a fresh pair of white bathing trunks. When he’d told her last night he could eat her alive, he hadn’t been kidding.
“Ciao, Antonio.” She was looking at one of the brochures while waiting for him.
“I understood you wanted to see me?” Her smile curved so seductively he wanted to throw her on the bed and stay there all day, but he resisted the urge. She was a fetching siren. Who would have guessed?
“How would you like to go to the nearby island with the waterfall? Manu says it’s a short hike, but worth it if you’re wearing tennis shoes.”
“I love hikes. I did it all over Switzerland and Kenya.”
She was amazing. “Manu told me it’s off-limits to everyone else while we’re here on our honeymoon.”
Her eyes lit up. “A whole island to ourselves? Let’s do it! I’ll pack us some food so we don’t have to come back for dinner.”
“Why not pack enough food in case we want to stay there overnight?”
“You mean sleep by the waterfall?”
He smiled at her. It was all he could think about. “Why not? Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to be Tarzan and Jane?”
She chuckled in response. “Yes. Many times.”
“We’ll take the speedboat.”
With their day decided, they packed things in the backpacks supplied by the resort, including light blankets, food and water. Antonio rang Manu to let him know where they were going. Then they left their retreat and took off for one of the dark green islands they could see in the distance that was taller than the others.
“The lagoon never changes, Antonio. It’s like eternal beauty all the time. I’ve never been this excited to do anything.”
She was reading his mind. They skimmed across the gorgeous blue water before reaching the white beach. Once they’d drunk some bottled water, they headed for the trail Manu said would be visible. Sure enough, they found it and started up the incline.
“The vegetation is so lush!” she exclaimed.
“Our own rain forest.” Their gazes clung before they got going on their trek. It took them less time to reach their destination than to have kayaked over there. Flowers grew in abundance. They spotted terns and swallows. The water came down in a stream, small at first, then widening before they reached the waterfall itself.
“Oh, Antonio—it reminds me of a waterfall scene in an old movie I once saw, but I think it was filmed in Hawaii.”
“This is as primitive as it gets.” He helped her off with her pack and gave her a long kiss. Then he removed his.
“Isn’t that spray marvelous? Look up there. If we can get on those rocks, we can ride the water down to the pool,” she said.
“Let me test the depth of it first.” He walked over to the edge and waded in the swirling water. He discovered that after a few steps there was a drop-off, but when he swam underwater he found it was only about twenty feet deep. When he emerged, he waved to her. “Come on in. It’s safe but a little cooler than the lagoon. Keep your tennis shoes on.”
For several hours they played in the water like children. Eventually they climbed up the side to reach the spot where the water from the mountain poured over the top of the rocks. He turned to his wife. “Shall we do it?”
“Yes.”
“Scared?”
“Terrified.”
“Take my hand.”
Together they moved onto the slippery rocks and before long the strength of the waterfall washed over them, plunging them down into the pool. Christina came up laughing. “Oh, Antonio—talk about a rush! This just couldn’t be real.”
He swam to her and kissed her over and over again while keeping them afloat. “We’ve found paradise, innamorata. How about one more jump, and then we’ll make camp for the night?”
Once again they hiked up the side to the top. Before they went out on the rocks, he plucked a white flower with a gardenia scent, growing on a nearby vine. He tucked it behind her ear. “Now you’re my Polynesian princess.”
Her eyes wandered over him. “I don’t ever want to go home.”
“Then we won’t.” He grabbed her hand and they inched their way onto the rocks until the force of the water took them over the edge. It was like free-falling into space until the water caught them and brought them to the surface.
Together they swam to the edge of the pool where they’d left their packs. He helped her out of the water and they proceeded to set up camp. After they’d made their bed, they put out the food. The exertion had made them hungry. They sat across from each other and ate to their hearts’ content.
He finally stretched. “I’ve never felt so good, never tasted food so good, never been with anyone I enjoyed more. In truth, I’ve never been this happy in my life.”
“I feel the same way,” she responded. “I want it to last, but I know it’s not going to.”
He shook his head. “Shh. Don’t spoil this heavenly evening. We have two more days and nights ahead of us.”
“You’re right.”
“You’ve lost your gardenia. I’m going to pick another one.” He got up and walked a ways until he found one. When he returned, he hunkered down next to her and put it behind her ear. “This is how I’m always going to remember you.”
Antonio couldn’t wait to get close to her again and cleaned up their picnic. When everything had been put away, she started to leave, but he caught her by the ankle. “Stay with me.”
“I was just going to get out of my bathing suit.”
“But I want to hold you first.” He pulled her down and rolled onto his side so he could look at her. “I’ve been waiting all day for tonight to come.”
“So have I.” Her voice throbbed.
He pulled her into him and claimed her luscious mouth that had given him a heart attack last night. “You could have no idea how much I want you. Love me, Christina. I need you.”
* * *
“Would it shock you if I told I wanted you to love me on our wedding night?” she admitted against his throat.
He let out a slight groan. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was afraid you would think I was too eager. I decided you needed time.”
Laughter broke from him. When he looked down at her, those fabulous silvery eyes were smiling. “I think that from here on out we each need to stop worrying about what the other one is thinking, and do more doing.”
“I couldn’t agree more. You drove me crazy on the way over in the jet.”
“Maybe that was a good thing,” he teased, kissing every feature on her face.
“It was painful!”
“Tesora mia,” he cried in a husky voice before starting to devour her. “I love your honesty. Come here to me.”
Christina melted in his arms and kissed him with the kind of passion he’d never imagined to find in this marriage. His heart jumped to realize he had such a loving, demonstrative wife.
CHAPTER SEVEN
ANTONIO HAD CALLED her his treasure. Christina felt cherished and desirable. His hunger aroused her to the depth of her being. This was her husband bringing her to life, shocking her, thrilling her as they found new ways to worship each other with their bodies.
His long legs trapped hers. “Why did I wait four years?”
She couldn’t have answered him if she’d wanted to. Enthralled by the things he was doing to her, Christina was too consumed by her own hunger for him. Like the spiral constellations lighting the canopy above, he sent her spiraling into another realm of existence. Throughout the hours of the night they loved fully until they finally fell asleep, only temporarily sated.
After their passion-filled night of ecstasy, she couldn’t believe they were still on earth. During the night he’d swept her to a different place, so intimate she’d wanted to stay on that sphere of euphoria forever.
She lay there wondering if last night’s lovemaking had resulted in a baby. Stranger things had happened to other women. She suddenly realized that she wanted his baby so badly she could hardly stand it.
Heat washed over her to remember what had happened between them last night. Christina wasn’t sorry that he hadn’t made love to her at first. Far from it. Last night had been magical.
Taking great care not to wake her husband and lover, she lay there looking at him. The sun was already high in the morning sky. They’d slept in late again, but it didn’t matter.
Oh, Antonio—I love you so much, you have no idea.
* * *
Antonio heard his wife sigh and glanced at her in sleep. She was the most unselfish lover he could ever have imagined. Last night she’d made him feel totally alive. Whole. When had he ever felt like this? Long after the stars had come out, they’d made love again and early this morning, again. He’d found paradise with her.
The next time he had cognizance of his surroundings, the sun was high in the sky. His wife lay on her side facing him. For a while he lay there studying her, then got to his feet and took a dip in the pool before pulling on his bathing trunks. He opened the backpack to get out some rolls and fruit. They’d need more food to stay on this island. He drank half a bottle of water while he ate.
She must have heard him and opened her eyes. “Oh—you’re up!”
“Just barely. Loving you has given me a ferocious appetite.”
She laughed. “I’m getting up, but you’ll have to turn your head.”
“Why?” he teased.
Christina blushed beautifully. “You know why.”
“I’m your husband.”
“I know, but—”
“All right. I’ll close my eyes, but I’ll give you to the count of ten to reach the water before I open them again.”
“Antonio—” she squealed.
“One, two.” He could hear the blanket rustle before she got up. A second later he heard water splashing and turned to watch her treading water. “You see? You made it.”
“If you’ll please put my bikini near the water and turn around, I’ll get dressed.”
* * *
Antonio’s deep laughter resounded through the forest. She could feel it reverberate inside her. “Anything to oblige.” He did her bidding. “I hate to tell you this, but the water is so transparent I can see you perfectly.”
“You’re no gentleman to say that to me.”
“Is that what you thought I was?” he mocked before turning his back.
She climbed out and dressed as fast as she could. When she reached him, he crushed her in his arms and gave her a kiss to die for. Then he handed her food and drink.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I wish we could stay here longer. Last night—” Her voice caught.
Their eyes met. “Last night will be burned in my memory forever, tesora.”
“Mine too.” She finished eating and started putting everything in their packs.
He worked with her. “Are you about ready?”
“Yes.”
After slipping on their tennis shoes, they started down the trail to the beach. In some parts she walked behind him, enjoying the play of muscle across his back and shoulders. Antonio had great legs for a man. In fact, there wasn’t a part of him that wasn’t perfect.
They reached the boat and loaded it. Christina helped him push it into the water, and then he helped ease her up and in before he took his place at the front. Before they took off across the lagoon, he looked back at her. As far as he could see, they were the only people out on this part of the lagoon.
“What do you want to do after we get back to the hut?” he called over his shoulder.
“I’d love to go to that coral sea garden and do some more snorkeling.”
“That makes two of us. When in our lives will we ever have a chance to see fish like this up close?”
“Probably never. I’m still pinching myself to believe there’s a spot like this on earth.”
“We’ll eat a meal and then go out for the rest of the day. Do you know what?”
“What?”
“You’re more fun than any of my friends.”
“Thank you.”
“I mean it. I don’t know anyone, male or female, who loves what I love and can do everything with me and keep up.”
“I’m afraid I didn’t turn out to be like my socialite parents.”
“Thank heaven!”
Those two words warmed her heart all the way back to their island. After putting things away, they sat down to a meal, then went back out to the deck. Antonio covered her in sunscreen. His touch made her knees buckle. “Shall we stay in bed the rest of the day instead?”
Christina could hardly talk. “I’d love it, but our time here is so short, we need to take advantage of it.” She couldn’t believe she’d worried that in a week Antonio might be bored with her. Maybe it was because all the time they’d spent together in Switzerland had prepared her to be more comfortable with him where everything felt so natural.
“Just remember we’ll have all night,” he whispered against her neck. His breath sent tendrils of delight through her system. While she was still trying to recover, he got out the snorkels and fins. Once again they got into the boat and went looking for fish. The lagoon was home to so many species they had the time of their lives viewing everything.
She lost track of the time. So did Antonio. It wasn’t until they suffered hunger pains that she realized it was time to go in. When they returned to the island and were tying up the boat, Manu was there to greet them.
“You two must have had a good day to be out so long.”
Christina smiled at him. “Every day is a good day here.” But she sensed he had something else on his mind. So did Antonio.
“What’s wrong, Manu?”
“There was a call from the palace in Halencia. You are to call your sister as soon as you can. You can use the phone here and I’ll put it through for you.”
Both Christina and Antonio exchanged worried glances. Any number of things could be wrong for her to interrupt their honeymoon. “Thank you. I’ll do it as soon as we’re finished here.”
“Your dinner is in the kitchen when you want to eat.”
“You’re terrific, Manu,” she said.
After he disappeared, Antonio helped her out of the boat and they put their gear away. Already there was a change in her husband. Lines darkened his features, making him look older. They’d had an unforgettable night of loving and had been so carefree she could have cried to see that anxious look cross over his face.
Together they walked inside the bedroom of the hut, both of them still wearing their bathing suits. He turned to her. “I’m going to put on a robe, then make the call.”
While he went into the bathroom to change, she pulled out some underwear and dressed in a pair of tan shorts and a cream top. Then she hung her bikini over the outside rail to dry, all the time frightened something serious had happened back home. An accident, or worse?
Antonio came out of the bathroom and walked over to the side of the bed to the phone. She sat down next to him. He put the phone on speaker and grasped her hand while he waited for Manu to connect the call.
“Tonio?”
“Elena?” His heart was racing. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m so sorry to bother you on your honeymoon, but—”
“Is anyone ill?”
“No, no. Everyone’s fine, but there’s something you need to know. I hope you’re sitting down to hear this.”
Antonio looked at his wife, anxious for what was coming. “Go ahead.”
“I—I have to give you some background first,” she stammered. “You know that guy Rolfe? The drug addict I wish I’d never met?”
He sucked in his breath. “Yes?”
“Last week he was arrested on heavier drug charges. He called me from the jail and told me that if I didn’t help him out of the new charges, he’d tell the press everything about what happened when he was jailed the first time.”
“What?” he and Christina cried out at the same time. His thoughts were reeling.
“I thought he was high on drugs when he called me and I hung up on him. But he phoned me on the morning you were getting married and threatened me again. I told him there wasn’t anything I could do. He hung up on me telling me I’d be sorry.
“Oh, Tonio—he leaked the news about your fake engagement to the press. It’s all over the media that you thought up the bogus alliance with Christina to get me out of trouble with the police. He claimed I used drugs too and should have been jailed along with him.
“It’s gone viral too. The internet is alive with rumours that you were having an affair in California while Christina was in Africa having an affair with the doctor. He made it all up, but it’s done its damage.
“Marusha phoned me and told me she and her family are sick about this and want to know what they can do to stop it getting any worse. I don’t know what to do.
“The palace is in an uproar. Both sets of parents are beside themselves. Guido’s trying to help everything by preparing a new list of princesses. In case you can somehow salvage your reputation and get your marriage annulled, you’ll have a list of royal hopefuls to choose from. I’m fighting for you, Tonio, but I can’t do it alone.”
Pain ripped him apart. His arm went around his wife. He could only imagine how Christina was feeling right now.
“I heard Father give immediate orders for the jet to be flown to Tahiti to bring you home. It’s on its way now and will arrive at the airport at six in the morning Tahitian time. You need to be ready with a plan and come home as quickly as you can to help sort out this disaster, because that’s what it is!
“There’s a groundswell from people who don’t believe you should be crowned because of the lie. I’ve been labeled a drug addict and am the result of my parents who aren’t worthy of ruling the country. The people are afraid the lack of integrity on both your part and Christina’s has compromised everything.
“If feelings reach tipping point, the people could withdraw their support for the monarchy and this could be the end of it. The coronation has been called off until further notice.”
“No,” Christina cried out.
“Oh, Christina, I didn’t know you were listening. Let’s face it. I’m the one responsible for all this. I’m the reason any of this has happened and I feel so horrible about it I want to die. I never realized how vindictive Rolfe could be. How cruel and heartless after what you did to get him a light sentence. I spent time with him when I was at my most rebellious and wasn’t careful with the information I let out without realizing it. You and Christina have every right to hate me.”
“Of course we don’t hate you,” he ground out. “For now you’ll just have to hang on until we get back to Halencia. Trust me. We’re going to sort this out. I’ll talk to you tomorrow in person. And, Elena, never forget that we love you.”
* * *
Christina had buried her face in her hands. “Bellissima—” He took her in his arms.
Hearing that word applied to her produced a groan from her. She was so horrified over the news she felt physically ill and couldn’t form words.
His body stiffened. “I wondered what form of chicanery has been underfoot while we were on our honeymoon. It’s what I expected. I just didn’t know in the exact manner it would explode. Christina? Look at me.”
She tried, but his image was blurry.
“I know this has come as a shock, but we’re going to get through this because there’s been total honesty between us, grazie a Dio. Remember Elena needs our protection more than ever. She’s very fragile right now.”
“You’re right. I knew there was something wrong when she kept saying she hoped we’d be happy. Throughout our wedding she was terrified and had to keep all that bottled up inside. The poor thing.”
He kissed her lips. “I’ll make arrangements for the helicopter to be here at five a.m. Then you and I are going to have a long, serious talk.”
His composure under these precarious circumstances was nothing short of miraculous. The affairs of the kingdom were falling apart, yet his mastery in dealing with it was a revelation. As far as she was concerned, this was Antonio’s finest hour.
Whether she ever became queen or not, she would act like one right now because Antonio had never needed her help more to present a unified front. She knew deep down he wanted to be king in order to save his country from possible ruin. More than anything, Christina wanted that for him, whatever it took.
She grabbed two bottles of water from the refrigerator and hurried through the hut to their bedroom. While she waited for him to come, she started the packing for both of them. Five o’clock would be here soon enough. They needed to be ready to leave.
Christina lifted her head when he came into the bedroom with their dinner tray. “Did you get through to Manu?”
He nodded. “Everything is set. Since you’ve packed the bags, we can eat.” He put it on the bed. “Come on.”
She took a shaky breath. “I—I couldn’t.”
“You have to. I don’t want my wife getting sick on me. We’re on our honeymoon and I intend to enjoy it for the next six hours.”
Christina actually laughed despite her agony.
Together they got on the bed and ate. When they’d finished eating, he got up to put the tray on the table. “Excuse me a moment. I’ll be right back.”
She wondered what he was doing until she heard Tahitian music from the radio piped into their room. Once he reappeared, he turned off the lamps and crawled onto the bed beside her.
“This music is enchanting, isn’t it?” she said.
“I love it. Come here to me,” he whispered. “I need you.”
The blood pounded in her ears before she moved into his arms. “What are we going to do, Antonio?”
“We’re going to stay just like this.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yes, but there’s nothing to do about anything until we reach Halenica, so you’re stuck with me.”
“That’s no penance. You smell wonderful.”
“So you’ve noticed.”
She swallowed hard. “I notice everything.”
“So do I. You’re a warrior under that fiery mane.”
“What a compliment.”
“It is, because you’re going to be queen and now I know you have the steel to help me. Any other woman would have gone into hysterics a little while ago. Not you.”
She smiled in secret pleasure. “You wouldn’t let me. That’s the sign of a great king.”
“The priest’s words never had as much meaning to me until now.”
“Which words were those?”
“The part where he said ‘From this day forward you shall be each other’s home, comfort and refuge.’ Whatever we have to face when we get back home, Christina, I’m not worried because you’ve become my refuge in a very short time.”
Tears stung her eyelids. He kissed them. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
“It’s the good kind. When I’m happy, I often cry.”
“I saw tears when you looked at your parents in the chapel. What was going on in your mind?”
“That I didn’t always want to be a disappointment to them. Now that there’s a national scandal, they’ll consider that I’ve hit rock bottom.”
“If they can’t see beyond the end of their noses and recognize a hatchet job of major proportions, how sad for them. But I couldn’t be happier that you turned out just the way you are. My one regret is that we’re going to have to leave our paradise far too soon. I’ve had you all to myself since the wedding ceremony and I love the privacy so much I’m loath to give it up.”
“I feel the same. We’ve been living most people’s fantasy.”
He suddenly held her tighter and burrowed his face in her neck. “I want this fantasy to go on and on.” The longing in his voice echoed the desire of her heart. “I want you to know I’ll treasure this time together for the rest of my life.”
“I’ve loved every second of it too. Isn’t this place wonderful?”
“Yes, but it would be a waste without the right person along. We’ll come back again one day and spend time over at the coral garden. We’ll do a lot of things, but right now I just want to make love to you.”
Once again the age-old ritual began. This time Christina took the initiative to show her husband how much she loved him. She loved him in every atom of her body and poured out her feelings, wanting to take away any pain he was feeling tonight. At one point he pulled her on top of him. It was heaven to cover his face with kisses and play with his hair. He was such a beautiful man, there were no words.
“Christina? We only have a few hours before we have to return to Halencia and deal with the mess. If I’d known it was going to happen, I would have insisted we get married sooner and enjoy a month’s honeymoon at least. Now it’s too late for that.”
But before their wedding, neither of them had a clue that they would come to care for each other in so short a time. Christina was positive that flare of desire she’d felt when he kissed her at the altar had been unexpected for him too.
“Are you happy?” His voice sounded anxious. “Because I want you to be happy.”
She heard the longing and drew in a breath. “I’m happier right now than I’ve ever been in my life.”
“Grazie a Dio, because I am too. I hope our daughter has red hair like her mother.”
“Would you mind if our son has red hair instead?”
“Your hair is glorious. Why would I mind?”
“Mother wanted to turn me into a brunette.”
“It’s a good thing you didn’t listen to her. When the time came, I wanted you for my bride.”
Yes. And he wound up with Christina to save his sister from disgrace. And now that the news had leaked, it was a national scandal, but he didn’t seem worried.
Their trust was on solid ground. More than ever she understood the deeper words of the priest. Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges, and live each day that you may share it together. From this day forward you shall be each other’s home, comfort and refuge, your marriage strengthened by your love and respect.
So far they’d shared each incredible day together. Their nights had been euphoric. This bedroom had become their home and refuge. She’d been able to comfort him in a way she wouldn’t have imagined. Living with Antonio was already changing her life and it frightened her that the happiness she was experiencing might be taken away from her after they returned home.
The next morning they awakened for breakfast. It had arrived with a newspaper. He pored over it.
Her heart thudded. “Anything to report about us?”
“There’s a photo of me taken at the airport. No matter how hard my father tried, the word still got out. But so far Manu has managed to keep our exact location a secret. He’s worth every Eurodollar he’s being paid.”
“Do you think your father will be upset?”
“Yes.” He flicked her a searching glance. “Are you in with me?”
“All the way. You know that.”
He put the newspaper down and moved himself away from the table. “Come out on the deck with me. I crave a walk along the beach with you before it rains.”
Her husband reached for her hand as they stepped down to the edge of the water and started walking. “With Bora Bora appearing and disappearing mystically through the clouds this morning, it looks surreal, Antonio. I feel like we’re in some primordial world. The air is so balmy it’s unreal.”
After they’d gone a ways, he stopped and grasped her arms so she faced him. “You’re so lovely you seem unreal. I need to know if I’m with a phantom wife.” In the next breath he lowered his mouth to hers and gave her the husband’s kiss she’d been dying for. Fire licked through her veins as she was caught up in his embrace. She knew he had to be in pain, but the way he was kissing her had her senses reeling.
Their bodies clung. She could feel the powerful muscles in his legs and melted against him. He released her mouth long enough to kiss her face and neck. His hands plunged into her hair before he kissed her throat, in fact, all the area of skin exposed by the sundress she was wearing home.
“Touch me,” he whispered in a ragged voice.
Succumbing to his entreaty, she wrapped her arms around his waist and heard his moan of pleasure as his mouth began devouring hers. The rain had started and was so ethereal in nature it felt more like a mist, adding to the rapture building inside her. Antonio was doing the most amazing things to her with his hands and mouth.
Too soon Manu arrived to tell them the helicopter had arrived. It was time to go.
CHAPTER EIGHT
THIRTY HOURS LATER the royal jet landed at Voti International Airport, where a helicopter was waiting to fly them to the palace. To their relief, no press was allowed on the tarmac.
During the times throughout the flight while Christina napped, Antonio had talked with his sister at length to get her to stop blaming herself. During the night his wife had been restless and couldn’t sleep. They were flying home to a hornet’s nest. She was holding her own, but he knew the emotions of his brave, beautiful wife were in turmoil.
At one o’clock that afternoon the helicopter landed on the back lawn of the palace closed to the public. He helped her down and they hurried toward the south entrance with several staff members bringing their luggage.
They rushed up the grand staircase to the second floor of the east wing. When he reached the doors of his apartment, he picked her up again like a bride.
“Antonio—” She hid her head against his shoulder. “We’ve already done this once.”
“I don’t care. I might feel like doing it every time we come in.” Before she could say another word, he silenced her with a kiss because he couldn’t help himself. She’d become the drug in his system. Her response electrified him. At this point he needed to be with her inside their home away from the world and make love to his wife.
After managing to open one of the two tall, palatial doors, he swept her through the apartment to the bedroom and followed her down on the bed. The staff knew better than to do anything but place the suitcases inside the main doors and leave them alone.
“Welcome to my world, Christina de L’Accardi. Besides family, you’re the first and only woman I’ve ever brought here. It’s always been a lonely place for me. Now it’s going to be our home.” It was liberating to crush her against him. One kiss turned into another. She wanted him as much as he wanted her.
Like clockwork both his cell phone and room phone started ringing. He moaned aloud before continuing to kiss her, but the ringing persisted until she tore her lips from his. “Of course everyone knows we’re back, Antonio,” she said out of breath. “You at least have to say hello.”
“That’s all I’ll say.” He sat up and reached for the bedside phone first, impatient because of the interruption of civilization. Being away from technology for a few days had been the best thing that could have happened to them. “Pronto—”
“Come sta, figlio mio?”
He looked at his wife, whose silvery eyes fastened on him still had the glaze of desire burning in their depths. His fingers ran over her lips. “Christina and I have been to heaven thanks to your generosity, Papa. But we were called back to earth too soon.”
“I’m thrilled you’ve had a wonderful time, but now we must talk.”
“Not now, Papa. My wife and I need the rest of this day together.”
“But there’s a crisis.”
His muscles clenched. “So I’ve been informed, but nothing’s more important than my time with her. I promise I’ll take care of things starting tomorrow. Give my love to Mama. Ciao.”
Christina chuckled. “You’ll have to answer your cell phone or it will never stop.” Letting out another sound of frustration, he reached in his pants pocket and pulled it out. When he saw the caller ID, he didn’t mind answering.
“Zach!”
“I’m glad you answered. Where are you?” His friend sounded more than anxious.
He smiled down at Christina. “We’ve just entered our humble home after being flown to paradise and back.” She kissed his fingers.
“I’ve never thought of Paris as paradise.”
“No. Bora Bora. A surprise wedding gift from my parents. You should take Lindsay there. You’d never want to come back.”
“Antonio? Is this really you? You sound strange, like you’re on something.”
He grinned. “I’ve been drugged all right.” A laugh came out of his wife. “Listen, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“But you’ve got problems, buddy. Big problems.”
“My other half is going to help me solve them.”
“But she’s part of the problem, if you get my meaning,” Zach said, lowering his voice.
“You’ve got that wrong. She’s the solution, but I appreciate your concern. You’re the best friend a man ever had next to his wife. Ciao.”
No sooner had he hung up to indulge himself with his beautiful bride than Christina’s cell phone rang. She had to get off the bed for the purse she’d accidentally dropped on the inlaid wooden flooring while her husband was carrying her.
She didn’t need to look at the caller ID to know who it was. Might as well get this over now. “Pronto?”
“Christina?” Her mother sounded mournful rather than angry. “Is it true that you had an affair while you were engaged to Antonio?”
She held her breath. “If I tell you that was a lie, would you believe me?”
“Yes.”
“Would Father?”
“I—I can’t speak for him. What are you going to do?”
Her mother sounded as though she really cared. “It’s up to Antonio.”
“Just remember I’m here for you if you need me.”
For her mother to say that was astounding to Christina. “Thank you, Mama. We’ll talk later.”
Antonio’s arms were locked around her from behind. But for once she didn’t feel like crawling into a dark hole never to come out again. She turned to Antonio. “Mother just gave me her support.”
“It’s about time, but don’t forget you’ve got me now.”
“I know.” She lifted her mouth to kiss him, but there was a knocking on the outer doors, loud enough to reach their ears in the bedroom. “Tonio? It’s me,” Elena cried. “Can I come in? It’s an emergency!”
“Tell her to come,” Christina urged him. “She’s been waiting for us.”
He gave her another hug before they both hurried through the apartment to greet his sister.
When he opened the door, they barely recognized Elena, who’d been crying for so long her blue eyes were puffy and her face had gone splotchy. “I’m so glad you’re home.” She threw herself into Antonio’s arms and sobbed.
Christina closed the door and the three of them went into the living room. When he let her go, she turned to Christina. As they hugged, his sister had another explosion of tears.
“Elena—it’s going to be all right. Come and sit down on the couch.” She drew her by the hand. Antonio sat in the love seat near them.
She brushed the tears from her cheeks. “I have something to tell both of you. Marusha and I have had a long talk. Her husband found out through another doctor that before Roger left Africa, he got drunk and told things to the doctor that were supposed to be kept quiet. But the other doctor was unscrupulous and leaked it to the news.”
Christina shook her head. “I should never have gone out with him.”
Antonio stood up. “If we all keep blaming ourselves for everything, nothing will be accomplished. What’s done is done.”
“There’s more,” Elena admitted.
He took a deep breath. “Go on.”
“I broke down and told our parents why you and Christina got engaged. I also told them Christina had never slept with that doctor. It was pure fabrication.”
“It’s all right, Elena. The truth will free all of us.”
His wife was so right!
He’d already known that Christina hadn’t given herself to the doctor. Antonio had been stunned at the time and overjoyed.
“They think you’re both so noble,” Elena kept on. “Our parents are prepared to do anything to help you. But as you know, they’ve lost Guido’s respect and he has powerful friends in the council who are ready to abolish the monarchy altogether. Some of the others wanting to keep the monarchy alive have prevailed on the archbishop to grant an annulment so you can remarry. There’s a list of titled women they’re vetting now with Princess Gemma at the top.”
Filled with joy that Christina was his wife, Antonio stopped pacing. “No. That isn’t going to happen. I’ve got plans, ideas to build the economy. Christina and I plan to enlarge the African charity to make it far-reaching. I have a new jobs initiative to help us become a leader in technology. Scandal has rocked this nation for years, but we’ll weather it. We have to.”
Elena stared at him as if she’d never seen him before.
His wife got up from the couch and stood in front of him, wearing the same white suit she’d worn on the plane to Tahiti. “We will.”
Two beautiful words from the mouth of the woman he couldn’t imagine living without. He kissed her in front of his sister before walking over to Elena and pulling her to her feet. “I’m glad the truth is out, all of it.” He gave her a hug. “Everything is going to work out.”
“It’s got to, because I love you two so much.”
Antonio looked at his clever, adorable wife. She was so remarkable he couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to be married to her.
He brushed his sister’s cheek with his finger. “So, what is the latest between you and Enzio?”
“We’re good.”
“Just good.”
“Um, very good.”
“I’m glad to hear it.”
“But you don’t need to hear about my love life right now. I’m going to leave you to your privacy and will talk to you later.”
They both hugged her before she hurried out of the apartment. He put his arm around Christina’s waist and walked her back to the bedroom. “Before we do anything else, I need to take another look at your foot. Why don’t you get undressed first? I want to make certain it is healing properly.”
“This is almost like déjà vu.”
While she started to take off her top and pants, her phone rang again. She’d left it on the end of the bed. “Let me get this first.” The caller ID said it was her great-aunt calling.
She clicked on. “Sofia?”
“Welcome home, darling. How was your trip?”
“Heavenly.”
“But you’ve come home to a viper’s nest. I know something that you don’t and I’m calling to warn you.”
Antonio came to stand next to her.
She gripped the phone harder. “What is it?”
“I’ve spent part of the day with your parents. Your father has left for the palace to talk to you. I tried in my own way to ask him to wait until tomorrow, but you know how he is.”
Yes… Christina knew exactly.
“For once in your life, darling, stand up to him and don’t let him bully you. He’s like his father and grandfather, born mean-spirited.”
This conversation meant her father was furious. “He’s a hard man to confront because he doesn’t have a soft side.”
“Unfortunately your mother has always been too afraid of him to intercede for you.”
Her eyes filmed over. “I always had you, Aunt Sofia.”
“And you’ve been one of my greatest joys.”
“Thank you for alerting me.”
“If there’s anything I can do…”
Christina turned to Antonio. “My husband and I are prepared to face whatever is coming. I love you so much for caring. Talk to you again soon.” She clicked off.
“What’s going on?” he murmured.
“My father is on his way over to talk to me.”
“I won’t leave you alone with him.”
She loved Antonio for saying that. “Knowing his style of quick attack, he won’t be here long. Do you mind if we talk in the living room?”
“Of course not. This is our home. You can have anyone you want here, anytime.”
“Thank you.” She rose on tiptoe and kissed him.
“I’ll go downstairs to my office and talk to my executive assistant. If you need me, I’ll be here in an instant.” She nodded. He put on a fresh sport shirt and left the apartment. Antonio was far too handsome for his own good.
This was her first chance to walk around her new home. The palace was a magnificent structure. Antonio’s apartment was bigger than any home she’d ever been in. Already she knew her favorite place would be the terrace overlooking the water.
To think Antonio had been born here and had lived here until he was old enough to be sent away to schools and college. There was so much to learn about him as a child as well as an adult, but she couldn’t concentrate when she knew her father would be coming any minute.
The phone on the bedside table rang. She walked over to pick it up. “Yes?”
“Princess Christina? This is the office calling. Your father is here to speak to you.”
“Can you send him to our apartment?”
“Si, signora.”
“Grazie.”
“Prego.”
Five minutes later she heard the knock on the door and opened it to see her father standing there. “Come into the living room, Papa.”
He looked around while he followed her, but he didn’t take a seat when she suggested it.
“Where’s your husband?”
“In his office downstairs.”
“What I have to say won’t take long.”
It never does.
His eyes glittered with anger. “If you want to do one thing to restore the name Rose in people’s estimation, you’ll leave Antonio for the good of the monarchy.”
“I thought you wanted a king for a son-in-law.”
He stared at her. “Not when his queen dishonored him by being with another man during the engagement. The people will forgive him, but they’ll never forgive you.”
She lifted her chin. “I didn’t dishonor him. Is that all you came to say?”
His lips thinned. “Use the one shred of decency left in you to allow Antonio to rule with the right queen at his side. He may stand by you now, but in time doubts will creep in, and doubt can ruin a marriage faster than anything else. Let him marry Princess Gemma.”
“Antonio didn’t want her the first time around. He chose me.”
Her father’s cheeks grew ruddy. “The archbishop will sanction a divorce since the marriage was fraudulent and your behavior during the engagement has painted you an immoral woman. You have one more opportunity in your life to right a tremendous wrong. Then public sentiment will end up being kind to you.”
“So if I do that and bow out of his life, will you forgive me for being born a woman instead of a man and be kind to me?”
“The one has nothing to do with the other.”
Her breath caught. “You mean that no matter what I do, there can be no forgiveness from you in this life?”
“You always were a difficult child.”
She stiffened and fought her tears. “I’m your daughter. Yours and Mother’s. I wanted your love. I wanted your acceptance. I tried everything under the sun to be the child you could love.”
“We gave you everything, didn’t we?” He turned to leave.
“Papa—”
Halfway out the door he said, “Has he told you he loves you? Because if he hasn’t, then you need to do the right thing. If you don’t know what is in Antonio’s heart, why take the risk?”
Beyond tears, she walked out to the terrace, clutching her arms to her waist. The warning phone call from her aunt Sofia hadn’t helped. She’d been thrown into a black void. Antonio had never said he loved her. She hadn’t expected him to love her, but that was before they’d gone to Tahiti together and she’d found rapture with him.
If she truly didn’t know what was in Antonio’s heart, then was it a risk to stay in the marriage as her father said?
After standing there for a while, she went back to the bedroom and called the palace switchboard. “Would you connect me with the palace press secretary please?”
“Si.”
In a minute a male voice came on the line.
“This is Princess Christina. I have a statement to come out on the evening news. I’ll have it sent to your office by messenger. If you value your job, you’ll tell no one. I mean, not a single soul.”
“Capisco, Princess.”
She hung up and went into the den, where she wrote out what she wanted to say. It didn’t take long. After putting the note in an envelope and sealing it, she phoned the charity foundation in Voti. Arianna, the manager, answered the phone. Thank heaven she was still there.
“Christina? I can’t believe you’re calling. I thought you were on your honeymoon.”
“We’re back. I need a favor from you. A big one. Can you stop what you’re doing right now and drive to the west gate of the palace?”
“Well, yes.”
“I’ll be waiting. This is an emergency.”
“I’ll be there in five minutes.”
“Bless you.”
She hung up and started throwing the things she’d need for overnight in her large tote bag. There was always money in her bank account and she had her passport. Without stopping to think, she left the apartment and hurried down the long hall of the west wing to the staircase.
When she reached the main doors, she stopped to talk to one of the guards. “Would you see that the palace press secretary receives this immediately?”
“Of course.”
“Thank you.”
Then she passed through the doors to the outside where another guard was on duty. “If the prince wonders where I am, tell him that an emergency came up at the charity foundation in town. One of my head people is picking me up so we can deal with it. I’ll phone the prince later, but he’s in meetings right now and can’t be disturbed.”
“Capisco.”
So far, so good. She rushed outside and waited under the portico until she saw Arianna’s red Fiat. Christiana hurried around the passenger side and got in. “You are an angel, Arianna, and I’ll give you a giant bonus.”
“Where do you want to go?”
“Back to the foundation.” She put on her sunglasses. It only took a few minutes to reach the building. “Why don’t you go on home? I’ll be working late and will lock up again.”
“All right.”
“This is for your trouble.” She handed her a hundred Eurodollars and got out of the car. When her friend drove off smiling, Christina hailed a taxi and asked to be driven to the ferry terminal. There were ferries leaving on the hour for Genoa during the summer.
She paid the driver, then hurried inside and bought a ticket. Within twenty minutes she walked onto the ferry and sat on a bench as it made its way to the port in Genoa. From there she transferred to the train station and caught the next train going to Monte Calanetti via Siena. So far no one had recognized her because pictures of her wedding to Antonio hadn’t been given to the press.
When it pulled in to the station, she phoned Louisa.
“Dear friend?” she said when Louisa answered.
“Christina?”
“Yes. I’m in Monte Calanetti. Do you have room for a visitor?”
“Did I just hear you correctly?”
“Yes.”
“Of course I have room!” No doubt Louisa figured correctly that there’d been trouble since their flight back from Tahiti. “You can stay in the bridal suite for as long as you want.”
“Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I’ll be there soon and tell you everything.”
As the taxi drove her to the Palazzo di Comparino, she turned off her phone. No one knew where she’d gone and that was the way she wanted things to stay.
* * *
Antonio had spent more time in his office than he’d meant to. He’d given Christina as much time as she needed to be with her father. After taking care of some business matters, he hurried to his wing of the palace. He planned to order a special dinner for them and eat out on the terrace. Having to come home early had robbed them of another precious night in Bora Bora, but tonight he intended to make up for everything. The need to make love to his wife was all he could think about.
“Christina?” There was no answer. He walked through to their bedroom. She wasn’t there. Maybe she’d gone exploring, but she hadn’t left a note. It was possible that after being with her father she’d gone to visit Elena. He phoned his sister. “Does Christina happen to be with you?”
“No.”
“Hmm. I was doing a little business, but she’s not here.”
“She loves the outdoors. Maybe she took a walk outside to the kennel. That’s what we usually do when she visits me. You know how much she adores animals.”
“Thanks for the tip.”
He put through a call to the kennel, but no one had seen her.
Angry with himself for not putting a security detail on her first thing, he phoned the head of palace security. “Alonzo? I’m looking for Princess Christina. Find out where she is and let me know ASAP. I want surveillance on her twenty-four-seven starting now.”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
He put off ordering dinner and hurried downstairs to the palace’s main office. “Did anyone here see Princess Christina’s father arrive?”
One of them nodded. “The princess asked that he be shown to your apartment. About twenty minutes later he passed by the office and left the grounds in a limousine.”
More than frustrated at this point, Antonio headed for Alonzo’s office. “Any news about her yet?”
Alonzo shook his head. “We’re still vetting everyone on the force. Some of them went off shift at five o’clock and we’re still trying to reach them for information.”
He frowned. She wouldn’t have gone to his parents’ apartment, would she? He called them on the chance that she was there for some reason. But they had nothing to tell him.
Definitely worried now, he put through a call to Christina’s parents. He should have tried there first. Her father got on the other extension. “Your Highness?”
“I’m looking for my wife. If you have any idea where she is, I’d like you to tell me now. The last anyone saw of her was you.”
“You mean she’s missing?”
His anger was approaching flash point. “What did you say to her?”
“The only thing a good father could say to his daughter. Do the right thing.”
Antonio saw red. He clicked off and spun around in fury. It was almost nine o’clock. Could she have flown to Nairobi without telling him?
Frantic, he asked Alonzo for his men to check the airport to see if she’d flown out. Within a few minutes the news came back that she hadn’t boarded any planes going anywhere.
“Hold on, Antonio. There’s another report coming in. The guard at the west gate saw her leave the palace grounds in a red Fiat before he went off duty just before five. He had no idea you were looking for her. She told him she was going to the charity foundation to take care of an emergency and didn’t want you to worry.”
His hands balled into fists. “Find out if she’s still there! We need to call all the girls working there to find out who drove the Fiat.”
Before long the report came back that the building was closed for the night. No sign of Princess Christina anywhere. In another minute they had a woman on the line. Antonio took the call. “Arianna?”
“Your Highness. I didn’t realize you were looking for her. When I dropped her off in front of the building, she said she was going to work in there for a while and that I should go home.”
“So you have no idea where she went, or if she even went inside.”
“No. I’m so sorry.”
“What state was she in?”
“She definitely had an agenda and asked me to hurry, but that’s all.”
“Thank you, Arianna.”
He handed the phone back to Alonzo.
Where are you, Christina. What did your father say to turn you inside out?
While he stayed there in agony, wondering where to turn next, the press secretary, Alonzo, came hurrying into the office. “Your Highness?”
Antonio turned to him. “Do you have news about the princess?”
His face had gone white. “I do. She told me if I said anything I’d lose my job, but I can’t let you suffer like this.”
“What do you know?”
“She handed me an envelope and wanted the television anchor to read her statement during the ten o’clock news.”
“She what?”
He nodded. “It’ll be on every network in five minutes in every country in the world.”
Alonzo turned on the big-screen television in his office. Antonio felt so gutted he started to weave.
“Better sit down, Your Highness.”
“I’ll be all right.” His heart plummeted to his feet as he saw the words breaking news flash across the screen.
Suddenly the female news anchor appeared. “There’s huge news breaking from the royal palace in Voti, Halencia, tonight, threatening to rock the already shaky monarchy decimated by scandal. It is struggling to stay alive in a nation so divided that one wonders what the ultimate outcome will be.
“I have in front of me a statement that Princess Christina, recently married in a private ceremony to Crown Prince Antonio de L’Accardi, has asked the press to read. These are her words and I quote. ‘Dear citizens of Halencia. It is with the greatest sadness that I, Princess Christina de L’Accardi, am removing myself from the royal family to end the bitter conflict. I confess that although my relationship with Prince Antonio started out as a publicity stunt for reasons I don’t intend to go into, I want everyone to know I love my new husband with every fiber of my being. A man with his integrity doesn’t come along every day, or even in a lifetime. I knew him when we were both teenagers. Even then he showed a love and loyalty to his country that put others to shame. I want everyone to know he’s the light of my life and my one true love. But I’m sorry that it isn’t enough for the people of Halencia.’”
Christina…his heart cried.
“Wow! How’s that for a heartfelt confession from the ‘Cinderella Bride’ as the nation has called her? Her charity in Africa has gained international attention. I have to admit I’m moved by her sacrifice and graciousness. That doesn’t happen to me very often. Stay tuned for news coming from the palace as the fallout from her surprising statement is felt throughout the country and the world.
“There’s no word from the prince or his family about this shocking development. You’ll have to stayed tuned when more news will be forthcoming.”
The television was shut off. Alonzo eyed Antonio with concern. “We’ll find her. Just give us time.”
“Thank you, Alonzo.” But he knew the damage had been done when her father talked to her. He’d done such an expert job of destroying her that Antonio doubted Christina might ever come out of hiding.
As he left the office and started up the staircase for his apartment on legs that felt like lead, his phone started ringing. He looked down. Good old faithful Zach. He clicked on.
“Antonio?”
“Si?”
“What a hell of a mess.”
“That doesn’t even begin to cover it,” he half groaned.
CHAPTER NINE
September, Voti, Halencia
AFTER HIS SPEECH, Antonio stood before the divided government assembly to answer questions.
“With all due respect, Your Highness, Princess Christina has graciously stepped aside to appease those voices who still want you to rule, but with someone more befitting to be your consort. Why won’t you listen to reason?”
His anger was acute. “What princess on your short list has devoted half her life to charity and worked among the poverty-stricken in Africa with no thought for herself? What princess would willingly give up the title of queen in order not to stand in the way of her husband?”
The room grew quiet.
“My wife hasn’t made excuses or defended herself, so I’ll do it for her. This so-called affair of hers was in truth a friendship, nothing more, but trust evil to find its way to do its dirty work. She remained true to our engagement. So I’ll say it again. If I can’t rule with Christina at my side, then I have no desire to rule. Therefore I’ve given orders that there’ll be no coronation.”
A loud roar of dissent from that part of the council loyal to him and the crown got to their feet, but he was deaf to their cries.
“But, Your Highness—”
Antonio ignored the minister of finance, his good friend, who was calling to him and stormed out of the council meeting. He walked out of chambers and headed straight for his office down the hall of the palace.
“Roberto?” he barked.
“Your Highness?” His assistant’s head came up.
“Call the press secretary and ask him to come in here right away. No one is to disturb us, do you understand?”
“Si.” He picked up the phone immediately.
Antonio went into his private suite and slammed the door, but he was too full of adrenaline to sit. With Christina’s stunning press statement read over the airwaves three weeks ago, plus her disappearance that had come close to destroying him, the joy he’d experienced on his honeymoon had vanished. He felt as if he’d been shoved down a pit and was falling deeper and deeper with no end in sight.
Within a few hours of searching for her that night, Alonzo’s security people had tracked his wife to the Palazzo di Comparino. Apparently Louisa had taken her in. His clever, resourceful wife had made her getaway so fast by car, taxi, ferry and train that it had knocked the foundation from under him.
There’d been no word from her for the past desolate three weeks, but he hadn’t expected any. Her father had made certain of that. With her press statement ringing out over the land, she would never come to him now. Meanwhile, Antonio had made a firm decision. He’d meant what he’d just said before the council. If he didn’t have her at his side, he didn’t want to be king at all.
For the first time in his life he was doing what he wanted, and he wanted Christina. No amount of argument could persuade him to change his mind. Being reminded by Guido that Christina had decided to sacrifice her own heart for Antonio’s reputation and the country had only made him fall harder for his wife, if that was possible.
Roberto buzzed him that the press secretary was outside. Antonio told him to send him in.
When the other man entered the room looking sheepish, Antonio said, “Do you want to redeem yourself?”
“Anything, Your Highness.”
“I want you to arrange a press conference for me on the steps of the palace in approximately one hour.”
“I’ll do it at once, Your Highness.”
* * *
Louisa had turned the sitting room at the palazzo into a TV room. Christina was grateful, since it was the only way she got information from the outside world. The rest of the times she took long walks and coordinated charity business with the foundations in both Halencia and Nairobi.
Between Marusha and Elena, she was kept apprised of their news. Marusha was pregnant after suffering two miscarriages. Christina couldn’t be happier for her. Elena’s boyfriend, Enzio, wanted to marry her, but it meant talking to her parents first and she was nervous about that.
Though there was plenty of talk because Louisa had constant visitors, no one mentioned Antonio in her presence. Her aching heart couldn’t have handled talking about him. Marusha begged her to come back to Africa. She would always have a home waiting. Christina told her she’d be coming in a few days. She’d outstayed her welcome with Louisa. It was time to go.
This afternoon both love-smitten Daniella and Marianna had come over for an evening with the girls. Christina had the suspicion Louisa was trying to cheer her up. She loved her for it and it was fun for all of them to get together.
Louisa poured wine from the vineyard and showed off her expertise about the vintage. Christina was impressed that she knew so much about it. Nico definitely had something to do with it.
Dinner wouldn’t be for another couple of hours. Christina wasn’t a wine drinker, but this afternoon was special, so she joined in with the others to take a sip.
Marianna smiled. “Hey, you guys—want to know a little gossip? I overheard Connor and Isabella talking wedding plans with Lindsay.”
“I knew it!” Louisa said while everyone cheered. “Oh—it’s time for the six o’clock news.”
“Do we care?” Daniella interjected.
“I do,” Louisa exclaimed. She hurried over to the TV and turned it on. Christina was secretly glad, since it was the only way she had of knowing what was going on at the palace. Her heart was broken for Antonio, who was having to carry on through the fight to determine the destiny of his country.
“Buonasera. Tonight we have more breaking news coming from the royal palace in Voti, Halencia. Crown Prince Antonio de L’Accardi has broken his long silence and has prepared a statement, which we will bring to you from the front steps of the royal palace.”
The image flashed to a somber Antonio in a dark blue suit who was so gorgeous that Christina feared her heart would give out. The girls grew quiet as all eyes were focused on him.
“Fellow countrymen and women, these have been dark times for the crown and it’s time for the conflict to end. I’ll be brief. As I told the National Council this morning, I dare any tabloid to come after me or my wife again.”
What? Christina shot to her feet.
“I admit that our engagement was originally a strategic move, but having spent time with Christina, I realize what an amazing person she is, how kind, generous and charitable she is, and how lucky this country is to have her as queen! I defy anyone to call our marriage a fake. To me it’s the most real and true relationship I’ve ever had. So I’ll tell you what I told the council. I’m in love with my wife and will not be giving her up, even if it means losing the throne!”
Christina was shaking so hard she might have fallen if she’d hadn’t been holding on to the chair. The girls stared at her in wonder.
Louisa smiled at her. “Every woman in the world with eyes in her head would love to be in your shoes right now, Christina Rose.”
She nodded. “I’d like to be in them too, but he’s not here.”
Footsteps coming from the hall caused them to turn. Christina came close to fainting when Antonio walked in. “Who says I’m not?”
“Antonio,” she gasped. “But you were just on television.” He was dressed in a sport shirt and chinos instead of his dark suit.
“That was taped at noon. This afternoon the council reassembled and voted unanimously for our marriage to stand. The coronation will take place in two weeks. Once I was given the news, I flew here in the helicopter. It’s standing by for me to take you back to the palace.”
By now the girls were on their feet, hugging her and each other for joy.
Christina watched as her husband in all his male glory walked over to her. His brilliant blue eyes blinded her with their heat.
“H-how did you know I was here?”
“Palace security traced you once we heard from the guard that you’d left the grounds with Arianna.”
“I thought I was being so careful.”
“You were. For a few hours your disappearance gave me a heart attack. Since we’d barely returned from Bora Bora, I hardly think that’s fair. Don’t you ever do that to me again.”
Her love for him was bursting out of her. “I promise.”
In front of everyone he picked her up in his arms as he’d done twice before. “Excuse us, ladies. We have very personal matters of state to discuss and must get back to the palace. The limo is waiting for us.”
Heat flooded her body as he carried her out of the room and the palazzo. After helping her into the car, he told the driver to head for Monte Calanetti before crushing her in his arms. “You don’t have to worry about the state of our marriage, cara. I’m madly in love with you and this is a new day.”
Christina was euphoric during their flight to Voti. Once they touched ground and were driven to the palace, he swept her along to their home on the second floor. Again he gathered her in his arms and carried her through to their bedroom.
After following her down onto the bed, he began kissing her. They were starving for each other. Christina couldn’t get enough of him fast enough. Everything that had kept them apart had been cleared away. She was able to give him all the love she’d stored up in her heart and body.
The next morning she heard a sound of satisfaction as he pulled her on top of him. Their night of lovemaking had appeased them for a little while. She sat up and looked at their clothes strewn all over the floor.
Antonio pulled her back down. “I’m in love with you, Christina. So terribly in love with my red-haired beauty I’ll never get over it. You believe me, don’t you?”
There was a vulnerability about the question that touched her heart. “I feel your love in every atom of my body, my darling. Is there any doubt how I feel about you after last night? I need you desperately and want your baby.”
“Anything to oblige the woman who has made me thankful I was born a man.”
“I loved you from the time I was fifteen, but I never dared admit it to myself because—”
Another kiss stifled any words. “We’re never going to talk about past sadness. When I called your father to find out what he said to you, he gave me the answer and I had a revelation of what it was like to grow up with him. All we can do is feel sorry for him. I believe your mother has always been afraid of him.”
“I know you’re right.” Just when Christina didn’t think she could love him anymore, he said or did something that made her love for him burn hotter. “I can’t wait to thank your parents for Bora Bora.”
“They’ve always lived their life over-the-top, but there’s one thing they did I’ll always be thankful for. They wanted us to find love.”
“Yes, darling, and we found it there.”
He kissed her neck and shoulders. “I’m the happiest man alive.”
“Are you ready for a little more happy news?”
“What?”
“Enzio has asked Elena to marry him.”
Antonio grinned. “He’s a brave man to want to take her on.”
“She’s worth the risk. Guess what else? Marusha is expecting a baby.” Christina kissed every feature. “I can’t wait until we can announce we’re having our own baby.”
“I’m going to do my best to make that happen. I know now the one thing missing in my life was you and the family we’re planning to have. We should have gotten married instead of engaged.”
“I think about that too, all the time. But I don’t think we were destined to get together until the time was right. We both had work to do first.”
Antonio rolled her over and looked down at her. “You’re the most beautiful sight this man has ever seen. I love you, tesoro mio. Never leave me.”
“You know why I did.”
A pained look entered his eyes. “The last three weeks have been the worst of my entire life.”
“For me too. But as you said, no concentrating on past sorrows. We’re together now and I’m able to live every day and night with the prince of my heart.”
While they were talking, the house phone rang. She eyed her husband. “That’s probably Guido wanting to know when you’re free to discuss royal business. You better put him out of his misery.”
Antonio grinned and picked up. “Pronto.”
“Your Highness, Princess Christina’s mother is asking if she can talk to her daughter in private.”
He covered the mouthpiece. “Christina?” Curious, she looked at him. He stared into her eyes with concern. “Your mother wants to talk to you.”
She swallowed nervously. “Is she on the phone?”
“No. It’s Guido. What do you want to do?”
“I’ll take the call.”
He handed her the receiver. “Guido?”
“Your mother asks if she can come to your apartment to talk to you.”
She blinked. “Now?”
“She’s says it’s of vital importance.”
“Then have someone show her up.”
“Very well.”
Antonio had picked up on the conversation. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“Yes. My mother let me know she’s on our side. Why don’t you order breakfast while I talk to her in the living room? She won’t be here very long, no matter what is on her mind.”
He pressed a swift kiss to her lips and did her bidding. As for herself, Christina could have changed into an outfit, but she decided the robe was perfectly presentable. Before long she heard a knock on the main door.
Sucking in her breath, she opened it. Her mother always looked impeccably dressed and coiffed. But Christina knew right away something was wrong when she saw the tears in her eyes. “Come in.”
But she just stood there.
“Mother?”
She shook her head. “I thought I could do this, but I can’t.” She started to turn away.
“Can’t do what?” Christina asked, causing her mother to stop.
“Ask your forgiveness, but I don’t have the right. I lost the right years ago. I knew your father must have had emotional problems when you were born. He wanted to give you up for adoption because you weren’t a boy. I purposely prevented any more pregnancies in case I had another girl.”
Christina was aghast at what she was hearing, but it made sense when she considered what her great-aunt Sofia had told her about the Rose men.
“I bargained with him that I wanted to keep you, and he wouldn’t be sorry. That’s why I kept you away. But you’ll never know my shame for what I’ve done.” She hung her head.
“I may have given birth to you, and your father may have provided you with everything, but you didn’t have parents who showed you the love and devotion you deserved.”
Christina stood there in shock as her mother broke down and sobbed.
“I’ll never be forgiven for what I did to you. I don’t deserve forgiveness, but you’re my sweet, darling girl. I love you, Christina. My pride in you is fierce. Just know that I loved you from the moment you were born and I wanted you to hear it from me. I won’t bother you again.”
“Mother? Don’t say that. I want us to have the relationship we never had. It’s never too late,” Christina said in a tremulous voice. “What you’ve told me about Papa changes everything.”
Her mother turned to her with a face glistening in tears. “You mean you don’t hate me with every fiber of your being? I would, because I’m not the great person you are.”
“Oh, Mama—”
Christina reached for her and hugged her until her mother reciprocated. They clung for a long time. With every tear her mother shed, Christina felt herself healing. “We’ll invite you over for dinner in a few weeks. I’ll be cooking.” She kissed her mother on both cheeks. “Dry your tears and I’ll see you soon.”
“Bless you, figlia mia.”
* * *
On Coronation Day bells rang out through the whole of Voti as Antonio and Christina left the cathedral and climbed into the open carriage. The massive throng roared, “Long live King Antonio and Queen Christina! Long live the monarchy!” They chanted the words over and over as the horses drew the carriage through the street lined with cheering Halencians.
The day had turned out to be glorious. Christina thought her heart was going to burst with happiness. Every few minutes someone called out, “Queen Christina!” When she turned, people were taking pictures.
Antonio sat next to her and squeezed the hand that wasn’t waving. “You know what they want, bellissima.”
She looked back at him. “You mean a kiss? I want it much more.” Showing breathtaking initiative that would probably cause her to blush later, she kissed him several times to the joy of the crowds.
The capital city of Halencia teemed with joyful faces and shouts of “Long live the monarchy.”
“Your country loves you, darling. You don’t know how magnificent you looked when the archbishop put that crown on your head.”
“It’s a good thing I didn’t have to keep wearing it. How does yours feel?”
“I like the tiara. It’s light.”
“Your hair outshines its gleam.”
They were both wearing their wedding clothes. The only thing different was the red sash on Antonio proclaiming him king.
“We made a lot of promises today.” She kept waving. So did he.
“Are you worried?”
“No, but the sun is hot,” he muttered. Their procession went on for over an hour.
Christina laughed. “I feel it too. But don’t worry. We’ll make it through and be alone later.”
“I can’t wait.”
Eventually the carriage returned them to the palace. On their way up to the balcony off the second floor, Antonio summoned Guido to bring them a sandwich and a drink. The chief of staff, who’d chosen to stay on with Antonio, looked shocked, but he sent someone for the food.
Antonio whispered in her ear, “Did you see that look he gave us?”
“We’re breaking royal protocol, darling.”
“We’ll be breaking a lot of rules before my reign has come to an end.”
She shivered. “Don’t talk about that. I can’t bear the thought of it.”
When the sandwich arrived, they both ate a half and swallowed some water. Feeling slightly more refreshed, they walked out onto the balcony to the roar of the crowd.
To please them her husband kissed her again with so much enthusiasm she actually swayed in his arms. A thunderous roar of satisfaction broke from the enormous throng that filled every square inch of space.
Once the royal photographers had finished taking pictures, Antonio grasped her hand. “Come with me.”
“Where are we going?”
“To our home for some R and R until the ball this evening.”
“But we’re supposed to mingle with all the dignitaries.”
“There’ll be time for that tonight.”
She hurried along with him, out of breath by the time they reached their apartment. When they entered, they discovered a lavish meal laid out for them in the dining room.
“Who arranged for this, darling?” she asked.
“My mother. She said it would be an exhausting day and we’d need it.”
“I think she’s wonderful.”
Once in the bedroom, she removed her tiara and asked him to undo the buttons of her wedding dress. “That didn’t take long. You did that so fast I’m afraid you’ve lost interest already. Last time you took forever.”
“I hope it drove you crazy.” He bit her earlobe gently when he’d finished. “Did it?”
“I’ll never tell.”
Antonio caught her to him and rocked her in his arms for a long, long time.
“Your capacity to love is a gift,” he whispered against her cheek. “I don’t know how I was the one man on earth lucky enough to be loved by you. I’m thankful your mother came to see you on the day we got back from Tuscany. She was able to answer the question that’s always been in your heart. The sadness in your eyes has disappeared.”
Christina threw her arms around his neck and looked into those blue eyes filled with love for her. “You’re right. And now I have one more secret to disclose. You were always the man for me. When you asked me to get engaged, I jumped, leaped at the opportunity. To be honest, deep down I was petrified you would come to Africa and call it off. So I played it cagey, and it paid off!”
After enjoying a meal, they made love again before it was time to go out to greet their guests and enjoy the royal celebration. Guido looked frantic as they approached the balcony.
“Your Highness, we’ve been waiting for your appearance to start the fireworks.”
Antonio hugged her waist. “We’re here now.”
No sooner had they stepped out so everyone could see them than a huge roar of excitement from the throng of people filled the air. Suddenly there was a massive fireworks display that lit up the sky, bursting and bursting, illuminating everything. Antonio looked into Christina’s eyes. Her heart was bursting with happiness.
“Ti amo, Antonio.”
He stared at her. “Darling, you’re crying. What’s wrong?”
“I’m so happy tonight I can’t contain it all.”
Giving the crowd what they wanted by kissing her, he whispered, “My beautiful wife. This is only the beginning. Ti amo, bellissima. Forever.”

Her Royal Wedding Wish
Cara Colter
In memory of Hunter 1997–2007
Beloved.
CHAPTER ONE
JAKE Ronan took a deep, steadying breath, the same kind he would take and hold right before the shot or the assault or the jump.
No relief. His heart was beating like a deer three steps ahead of a wolf pack. His palms were slick with sweat.
He was a man notorious for keeping his cool. And in the past three years that notoriety had served him well. He’d taken a hijacked plane back from the bad guys, jumped from ten thousand feet in the dead of night into territory controlled by hostiles, rescued fourteen school-children from a hostage taking.
But in the danger-zone department nothing did him in like a wedding. He shrugged, rolled his shoulders, took another deep breath.
His old friend, Colonel Gray Peterson, recently retired, the reason Ronan was here on the tiny tropical-island paradise of B’Ranasha, shifted uneasily beside him. Under his breath he said a word that probably had never been said in a church before. “You don’t have your sideways feeling, do you?” Gray asked.
Ronan was famous among this tough group of men, his comrades-in-arms, for the feeling, a sixth sense that warned him things were about to go wrong, in a big way.
“I just don’t like weddings,” he said, keeping his voice deliberately hushed. “They make me feel uptight.”
Gray contemplated that as an oddity. “Jake,” he finally said reassuringly, his use of Ronan’s first name an oddity in itself, “it’s not as if you’re the one getting married. You’re part of the security team. You don’t even know these people.”
Ronan had never been the one getting married, but his childhood had been littered with his mother’s latest attempt to land the perfect man. His own longing for a normal family, hidden under layers of adolescent belligerence, had usually ended in disillusionment long before the day of yet another elaborate wedding ceremony, his mother exchanging starry-eyed “I do’s” with yet another temporary stepfather.
Ronan had found a family he enjoyed very much when he’d followed in his deceased father’s footsteps, over his mother’s strenuous and tear-filled protests, and joined the Australian military right out of high school. Finally, there had been structure, predictability and genuine camaraderie in his life.
And then he’d been recruited for a multinational military unit that was a first-response team to world crises. The unit, headquartered in England, was comprised of men from the most elite special forces units around the world. They had members from the British Forces SAS, from the French Foreign Legion, from the U.S. SEALs and Delta Force.
His family became a tight-knit brotherhood of warriors. They went where angels feared to go; they did the work no one else wanted to do; they operated in the most dangerous and troubled places in the world. As well as protecting world figures at summits, conferences, peace talks, they dismantled bombs, gathered intelligence, took back planes, rescued hostages, blew up enemy weapons caches. They did the world’s most difficult work. They did it quickly, quietly and anonymously. There were few medals, little acknowledgment, no back-patting ceremonies.
But there was: brutal training, exhausting hours, months of deep cover and more danger than playing patty-cake with a rattlesnake.
When Ronan had been recruited, he had said a resounding yes. A man knew exactly when his natural-born talents intersected with opportunity, and from his first day in the unit, code-named Excalibur, he had known he had found what he was born to do.
A family, other than his brothers in arms, was out of the question. This kind of work was unfair to the women who were left at home. A man so committed to a dangerous lifestyle was not ready to make the responsibilities of a family and a wife his priority.
Which was a happy coincidence for a man who had the wedding thing anyway. Ronan’s most closely guarded secret was that he, fearless fighting man, pride of Excalibur, would probably faint from pure fright if he ever had to stand at an altar like the one at the front of this church as a groom. As a man waiting for his bride.
So far, no one was standing at it, though on this small island, traditions were slightly reversed. He’d been briefed to understand that the bride would come in first and wait for the groom.
Music, lilting and lovely, heralded her arrival, but above the notes Ronan heard the rustle of fabric and slid a look down the aisle of the church. A vision in ivory silk floated slowly toward them. The dress, the typical wedding costume of the Isle of B’Ranasha, covered the bride from head to toe. It was unfathomable how something so unrevealing could be so sensual.
But it was. The gown clung to the bride’s slight curves, accentuated the smooth sensuality of her movements. It was embroidered in gold thread that caught the light and thousands of little pearls that shimmered iridescently.
The reason Ronan was stationed so close to the altar was that this beautiful bride, Princess Shoshauna of B’Ranasha, might be in danger.
Since retiring from Excalibur, Gray had taken the position as head of security for the royal family of B’Ranasha. With the upcoming wedding, he’d asked Ronan if he wanted to take some leave and help provide extra security. At first Gray had presented the job as a bit of a lark—beautiful island, beautiful women, unbeatable climate, easy job, lots of off-time.
But by the time Ronan had gotten off the plane, the security team had intercepted a number of threats aimed directly at the princess, and Gray had been grim-faced and tense. The colonel was certain they were generating from within the palace itself, and that a serious security breach had developed within his own team.
“Look at the lady touching the flowers,” Gray said tersely.
Ronan spun around, amazed by how much discipline it took to take his eyes off the shimmering vision of that bride. A woman at the side of the church was fiddling with a bouquet of flowers. She kept glancing nervously over her shoulder, radiating tension.
There it was, without warning, that sudden downward dip in his stomach, comparable to a ten-story drop on a roller coaster.
Sideways.
Surreptitiously Ronan checked his weapon, a 9mm Glock, shoulder holstered. Gray noticed, cursed under his breath, tapped his own hidden weapon, a monstrosity that members of Excalibur liked to call the Cannon.
Ronan felt himself shift, from a guy who hated weddings to one hundred percent warrior. It was moments exactly like this that he trained for.
The bride’s gown whispered as she walked to the front.
Gray gave him a nudge with his shoulder. “You’re on her,” he said. “I’m on the flower lady.”
Ronan nodded, moved as close to the altar as he could without drawing too much attention to himself. Now he could smell the bride’s perfume, tantalizing, as exotic and beautiful as the abundant flowers that bloomed in profusion in every open space of this incredible tropical hideaway.
The music stopped. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the flower lady duck. Now, he thought, and felt every muscle tense and coil, ready.
Nothing happened.
An old priest came out of the shadows at the front of the chapel, his golden face tranquil, his eyes crinkled with good humor and acceptance. He wore the red silk robe of a traditional B’Ranasha monk.
Ronan felt Gray’s tension beside him. They exchanged glances. Gray’s hand now rested inside his jacket. His facade of complete calm did not fool Ronan. His buddy’s hand was now resting on the Cannon. Despite the unchanging expression on Gray’s face, Ronan felt the shift in mood, recognized it as that itching for action, battle fever.
The sideways feeling in Ronan’s stomach intensified. His brain did a cool divide, right down the middle. One part of him watched the priest, the bride. The groom would arrive next. One part of him smelled perfume and noted the exquisite detail on her silk dress.
On the other side of the divide, Ronan had become pure predator, alert, edgy, ready.
The bride lifted her veil, and for just a split second his warrior edge was gone. Nothing could have prepared Jake Ronan for the fact he was looking into the delicate, exquisite perfect features of Princess Shoshauna of B’Ranasha.
His preparation for providing security for the wedding had included learning to recognize all the members of the royal families, especially the prospective bride and groom, but there had never been any reason to meet them.
He had been able to view Shoshauna’s photographs with detachment: young, pretty, pampered. But those photos had not prepared him for her in the flesh. Her face, framed by a shimmering black waterfall of straight hair, was faintly golden and flawless. Her eyes were almond shaped, tilted upward, and a shade of turquoise he had seen only once before, in a bay where he’d surfed in his younger days off the coast of Australia.
She blinked at him, then looked to the back of the room.
He yanked himself away from the tempting vision of her. It was very bad to lose his edge, his sense of mission, even for a split second. A warning was sounding deep in his brain.
And in answer to it, the back door of the church whispered open. Ronan glanced back. Not the prince. A man in black. A hood over his face. A gun.
Long hours of training had made Ronan an extremely adaptable animal. His mission instantly crystallized; his instincts took over.
His mission became to protect the princess. In an instant she was the focus of his entire existence. If he had to, he would lay down his life to keep her safe. No hesitation. No doubt. No debate.
The immediate and urgent goal: remove Princess Shoshauna from harm’s way. That meant for the next few minutes, things were going to get plenty physical. He launched himself at her, registered the brief widening of those eyes, before he shoved her down on the floor, shielding her body with his own.
Even beneath the pump of pure adrenaline, a part of him felt the exquisite sweetness of her curves, felt a need beyond the warrior’s response trained into him—something far more primal and male—to protect her fragility with his own strength.
A shot was fired. The chapel erupted into bedlam.
“Ronan, you’re covered,” Gray shouted. “Get her out of here.”
Ronan yanked the princess to her feet, put his body between her and the attacker, kept his hand forcefully on the fragile column of her neck to keep her down.
He got himself and the princess safely behind the relative protection of the stone altar, pushed her through an opening into the priest’s vestibule. There Ronan shattered the only window and shoved Princess Shoshauna through it, trying to protect her from the worst of the broken glass with his own arm.
Her skirt got caught, and most of it tore away, which was good. Without the layers of fabric, he discovered she could run like a deer. They were in an alleyway. He kept his hand at the small of her back as they sprinted away from the church. In the background he heard the sound of three more shots, screams.
The alley opened onto a bright square, postcard pretty, with white stucco storefronts, lush palms, pink flowers the size of basketballs. A cabdriver, oblivious to the backdrop of firecracker noises, was in his front seat, door open, slumbering in the sun. Ronan scanned the street. The only other vehicle was a donkey cart for tourists, the donkey looking as sleepy as the cabdriver.
Ronan made his decision, pulled the unsuspecting driver from his cab and shoved the princess in. She momentarily got hung up on the gearshift. He shoved her again, and she plopped into the passenger seat. He then jumped in behind her, turned the key and slammed the vehicle into gear.
Within seconds the sounds of gunfire and the shouted protests of the cabdriver had faded in the distance, but he kept driving, his brain pulling up maps of this island as if he had an Internet search program.
“Do you think everyone’s all right back there?” she asked. “I’m worried about my grandfather.”
Her English was impeccable, her voice a silk scarf—soft, sensual, floating across his neck as if she had actually touched him.
He shrugged the invisible hand away, filed it under interesting that she was more worried about her grandfather than the groom. And he red-flagged it that the genuine worry on her face made him feel a certain unwanted softness for her.
Softness was not part of his job, and he liked to think not part of his nature, either, trained out of him, so that he could make clinical, precise decisions that were not emotionally driven. On the other hand he’d been around enough so-called important people to be able to appreciate her concern for someone other than herself.
“No one was hit,” he said gruffly.
“How could you know that? I could hear gunfire after we left.”
“A bullet makes a different sound when it hits than when it misses.”
She looked incredulous and skeptical. “And with everything going on, you were listening for that?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Not listening for that exactly, but listening. He had not heard the distinctive ka-thunk of a hit, nor had he heard sounds that indicated someone badly hurt. Details. Every member of Excalibur was trained to pay attention to details that other people missed. It was amazing how often something that seemed insignificant could mean the difference between life and death.
“My grandfather has a heart problem,” she said softly, worried.
“Sorry.” He knew he sounded insincere, and at this moment he was. He only cared if one person was safe, and that was her. He was not risking a distraction, a misdirection of energy, by focusing on anything else.
As if to challenge his focus, his cell phone vibrated in his pocket. He had turned it off for the wedding, because his mother had taken to leaving him increasingly frantic messages that she had big news to share with him. Big news in her life always meant one thing: a new man, the proclamation it was different this time, more extravagant wedding plans.
Some goof at Excalibur, probably thinking it was funny, had given her his cell number against his specific instructions. But a glance at the caller ID showed it was not his mother but Gray.
“Yeah,” he answered.
“Clear here.”
“Here, too. Aurora—” he named the princess in Sleeping Beauty, a reference that was largely cultural, that might not be understood by anyone listening “—is fine.”
“Excellent. We have the perp. No one injured. The guy was firing blanks. He could have been killed. What kind of nutcase does that?”
He contemplated that for a moment and came up with one who wants to stop the wedding. “Want me to bring her back in? Maybe they could still go ahead with the ceremony.”
Details. The princess flinched ever so slightly beside him.
“No. Absolutely not. Something’s wrong here. Really wrong. Nobody should have been able to penetrate the security around that wedding. It has to be someone within the palace, so I don’t want her back here until I know who it is. Can you keep her safe until I get to the bottom of it?”
Ronan contemplated that. He had a handgun and two clips of ammunition. He was a stranger to the island and was now in possession of a stolen vehicle, not to mention a princess.
Despite circumstances not being anywhere near perfect, he knew in his business perfect circumstances were in short supply. It was a game of odds, and of trust in one’s own abilities. “Affirmative,” he said.
“I can’t trust my phone, but we can probably use yours once more to give you a time frame and set a rendezvous.”
“All right.” He should have hung up, but he made the mistake of glancing at her pinched face. “Ah, Gray? Is her grandfather all right?”
“Slamming back the Scotch.” Gray lowered his voice, “Though he actually seems a little, er, pleased, that his granddaughter didn’t manage to get married.”
Ronan pocketed his phone. “Your grandfather’s fine.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful news! Thank you!”
“I can’t take you back just yet, though.”
Some finely held tension disappeared from her shoulders, as if she allowed herself to start breathing after holding her breath.
Eyes that had been clouded with worry, suddenly tilted upward when she smiled. If he was not mistaken, and he rarely was, given his gift with details, a certain mischief danced in their turquoise depths.
She did not inquire about the groom, and now that her concerns for her grandfather had been relieved, she didn’t look anything like a woman who had just had her wedding ceremony shattered by gunfire, her dress shredded. In fact, she looked downright happy. As if to confirm that conclusion, she took off her bridal headdress, held it out the window and let the wind take it. She laughed with delight as it floated behind them, children chasing it down the street.
The wind billowing through the open window caught at the tendrils of her hair, and she shook it all free from the remaining pins that held it, and it spilled down over the slenderness of her shoulders.
If he was not mistaken, Princess Shoshauna was very much enjoying herself.
“Look, Your Highness,” he said, irritated. “This is not a game. Don’t be throwing anything else out the window that will make us easy to follow or remember.”
She tossed her hair and gave him a look that was faintly mutinous. Obviously, because of her position, she was not accustomed to being snapped at. But that was too bad. There was only room for one boss here, and it wasn’t going to be her.
With the imminent danger now at bay, at least temporarily, his thought processes slowed, and he began to sort information. His assessment of the situation wasn’t good. He had been prepared to do a little wedding security, not to find himself in possession of a princess who had someone trying to kill her.
He didn’t know the island. He had no idea where he could take her where it would be secure. He had very little currency, and at some point he was going to have to feed her, and get her out of that all-too-attention-grabbing outfit. He had to assume that whoever was after her would be sophisticated enough to trace credit card use. Ditto for his cell phone. They could use it once more to arrange a time and place for a rendezvous and then he’d have to pitch it. On top of that, he had to assume this vehicle had already been reported stolen; it would have to be ditched soon.
On the plus side, she was alive, and he planned to keep it that way. He had a weapon, but very little ammunition.
He was going to have to use the credit card once. To get them outfitted. By the time it was traced, they could be a long way away.
“Do you have any enemies?” he asked her. If he had one more phone call with Gray, maybe he could have some information for him. Plus, it would help him to know if this threat was about something personal or if it was politically motivated. Each of those scenarios made for a completely different enemy.
“No,” she said, but he saw the moment’s hesitation.
“No one hates you?”
“Of course not.” But again he sensed hesitation, and he pushed.
“Who do you think did this?” he asked. “What’s your gut feeling?”
“What’s a gut feeling?” she asked, wide-eyed.
“Your instinct.”
“It’s silly.”
“Tell me,” he ordered.
“Prince Mahail was seeing a woman before he asked me to marry him. She’s actually a cousin of mine. She acted happy for me, but—”
Details. People chose to ignore them, which was too bad. “Your instincts aren’t silly,” he told her gruffly. “They could keep you alive. What’s her name?”
“I don’t want her to get in trouble. She probably has nothing to do with this.”
The princess wasn’t just choosing to ignore her instincts, but seemed determined to. Still, he appreciated her loyalty.
“She won’t be in trouble.” If she didn’t do anything. “Her name?”
“Mirassa,” she said, but reluctantly.
“Now tell me how to find a market. A small one, where I can get food. And something for you to wear.”
“Oh,” she breathed. “Can I have shorts?” She blinked at him, her lashes thick as a chimney brush over those amazing ocean-bay eyes.
He tried not to sigh audibly. Wasn’t that just like a woman? Even a crisis could be turned into an opportunity to shop!
“I’m getting what draws the least attention to you,” he said, glancing over at her long legs exposed by her torn dress. “I somehow doubt that’s going to be shorts.”
“Am I going to wear a disguise?” she asked, thrilled.
She was determined not to get how serious this was. And maybe that was good. The last thing he needed was hysteria.
“Sure,” he said, going along, “you get to wear a disguise.”
“You could pretend to be my boyfriend,” Princess Shoshauna said, with way too much enthusiasm. “We could rent a motorcycle and blend in with the tourists. How long do you think you’ll have to hide me?”
“I don’t know yet. Probably a couple of days.”
“Oh!” she said, pleased, determined to perceive this life-and-death situation as a grand adventure. “I have always wanted to ride a motorcycle!”
The urge to strangle her was not at all in keeping with the businesslike, absolutely emotionless attitude he needed to have around her. That attitude would surely be jeopardized further by pretending to be her boyfriend, by sharing a motorcycle with her. His mind went there—her pressed close, her crotch pressed into the small of his back, the bike throbbing underneath them.
Buck up, soldier, he ordered himself. There’s going to be no motorcycle.
“I’ll cut my hair,” she decided.
It was the first reasonable idea she had presented, but he was aware he wasn’t even considering it. Her hair was long and straight, jet-black and glossy. Her hair was glorious. He wasn’t letting her cut her hair, even if it would be the world’s greatest disguise.
He knew he was making that decision for all the wrong reasons, and that his professionalism had just slipped the tiniest little notch. There was no denying the sideways feeling seemed to have taken up permanent residence in his stomach.
Shoshauna slid the man who was beside her a look and felt the sweetest little dip in the region of her stomach. He was incredibly good-looking. His short hair was auburn, burnt brown with strands of red glinting as the sun struck it. His eyes, focused on the road, were topaz colored, like a lion’s. As if the eyes were not hint enough of his strength, there was the formidable set of his lips, the stubborn set of his chin, the flare of his nostrils.
He was a big man, broad and muscled, not like the slighter men of B’Ranasha. When he had thrown her onto the floor of the chapel, she had felt the shock first. No man had ever touched her like that before! Technically, it had been more a tackle than a touch. But then she had become aware of the hard, unforgiving lines of him, felt the strange and forbidden thrill of his male body shielding hers.
Even now she watched as his hands found their way to his necktie, tugged impatiently at it. He loosened it, tugged it free, shoved it in his pocket. Next, he undid the top button of his shirt, rubbed his neck as if he’d escaped the hangman’s noose.
“What’s your name?” she asked. It was truly shocking, considering how aware she’d felt of him, within seconds of marrying someone else. She glanced at his fingers, was entranced by the shape of them, the faint dusting of hair on the knuckles. Shocked at herself, she realized she could imagine them tangling in her hair.
Of course, she had led a somewhat sheltered life. This was the closest she had ever been, alone, to a man who was not a member of her own family. Even her meetings with her fiancé, Prince Mahail of the neighboring island, had been very formal and closely chaperoned.
“Ronan,” he said, and then had to swerve to miss a woman hauling a basket of chickens on her bicycle. He said a delicious-sounding word that she had never heard before, even though she considered her English superb. The little shiver that went up and down her spine told her the word was naughty. Very naughty.
“Ronan.” She tried it out, liked how it felt on her tongue. “You must call me Shoshauna!”
“Your Highness, I am not calling you Shoshauna.” He muttered the name of a deity under his breath. “I think it’s thirty lashes for calling a member of the royal family by their first name.”
“Ridiculous,” she told him, even though it was true: no one but members of her immediate family would even dare being so familiar as to call her by her first name. That was part of the prison of her role as a member of B’Ranasha’s royal family.
But she’d been rescued! Her prayers had been answered just when she had thought there was no hope left, when she had resigned herself to the fact she had agreed to a marriage to a man she did not love.
She did not know how long this reprieve could possibly last, but despite Ronan telling her so sternly this was not a game, Shoshauna intended to make the very most of it. Whether she had been given a few hours or a few days, she intended to be what she might never be again. Free. To be what she had always wanted most to be.
An ordinary girl. With an ordinary life.
She was determined to get a conversation going, to find out as much about this intriguing foreigner as she could. She glanced at his lips and shivered. Would making the most of the gift the universe had handed her include tasting the lips of the intriguing foreigner?
She knew how wrong those thoughts were, but her heart beat faster at the thought. How was it that imagining kissing Ronan, a stranger, could fill her with such delirious curiosity, when the thought of what was supposed to have happened tonight, between her and the man who should have become her husband, Prince Mahail, filled her with nothing but dread?
“What nationality are you?”
“Does it matter? You don’t have to know anything about me. You just have to listen to me.”
His tone, hard and cold, did not sound promising in the kiss department! Miffed, she wondered how he couldn’t know that when a princess asked you something, you did not have the option of not answering. Even though she desperately wanted to try life as an ordinary girl, old habit made her give him her most autocratic stare, the one reserved for misbehaving servants.
“Australian,” he snapped.
That explained the accent, surely as delicious sounding as the foreign phrase he had uttered so emphatically when dodging the chicken bicycle. She said the word herself, out loud, using the same inflection he had.
The car swerved, but he regained control instantly. “Don’t say that word!” he snapped at her, and then added, a reluctant afterthought at best, “Your Highness.”
“I’m trying to improve my English!”
“What you’re trying to do is get me a one-way ticket to a whipping post for teaching the princess curse words. Do they still whip people here?”
“Of course,” she lied sweetly. His expression darkened to thunder, but then he looked hard at her, read the lie, knew she was having a little fun at his expense. He made a cynical sound deep in his throat.
“Are women in Australia ever forced to marry men they don’t love?” she asked. But the truth was, she had not been forced. Not technically. Her father had given her a choice, but it had not been a real choice. The weight of his expectation, her own desperate desire to please him, to be of value to him had influenced her decision.
Plus, Prince Mahail’s surprise proposal had been presented at a low point in her life, just days after her cat, Retnuh, had died.
People said it was just a cat, had been shocked at her level of despair, but she’d had Retnuh since he was a kitten, since she’d been a little girl of eight. He’d been her friend, her companion, her confidante, in a royal household that was too busy to address the needs of one insignificant and lonely little princess.
“Turn here, there’s a market down this road.”
He took the right, hard, then looked straight ahead.
“Well?” she asked, when it seemed he planned to ignore her.
“People get married all over the world, for all kinds of reasons,” he said. “Love is no guarantee of success. Who even knows what love is?”
“I do,” she said stubbornly. It seemed her vision of what it was had crystallized after she’d agreed to marry the completely wrong man. But by then it had been too late. In her eagerness to outrun how terrible she felt about her cat, Shoshauna had allowed herself to get totally caught up in the excitement—preparations underway, two islands celebrating, tailors in overtime preparing gowns for all members of both wedding parties, caterers in overdrive, gifts arriving from all over the world—of getting ready for a royal wedding.
She could just picture the look of abject disappointment on her father’s face if she had gone to him and asked to back out.
“Sure you do, Princess.”
His tone insinuated she thought love was a storybook notion, a schoolgirl’s dream.
“You think I’m silly and immature because I believe in love,” she said, annoyed.
“I don’t know the first thing about you, what you believe or don’t believe. And I don’t want to. I have a job to do. A mission. It’s to keep you safe. The less I know about you personally the better.”
Shoshauna felt stunned by that. She was used to interest. Fawning. She could count on no one to tell her what they really thought. Of course, it was all that patently insincere admiration that had made her curl up with her cat at night, listen to his deep purring and feel as if he was the only one who truly got her, who truly loved her for exactly what she was.
If even one person had expressed doubt about her upcoming wedding would she have found the courage to call it off? Instead, she’d been swept along by all that gushing about how wonderful she would look in the dress, how handsome Prince Mahail was, what an excellent menu choice she had made, how exquisite the flowers she had personally picked out.
“There’s the market,” she said coldly.
He pulled over, stopped her as she reached for the handle. “You are staying right here.”
Her arm tingled where his hand rested on it. Unless she was mistaken, he felt a little jolt, too. He certainly pulled away as though he had. “Do you understand? Stay here. Duck down if anyone comes down the road.”
She nodded, but perhaps not sincerely enough.
“It’s not a game,” he said again.
“All right!” she said. “I get it.”
“I hope so,” he muttered, gave her one long, hard, assessing look, then dashed across the street.
“Don’t forget scissors,” she called as he went into the market. He glared back at her, annoyed. He hadn’t said to be quiet! Besides, she didn’t want him to forget the scissors.
She had wanted to cut her hair since she was thirteen. It was too long and a terrible nuisance. It took two servants to wash it and forever to dry.
“Princesses,” her mother had informed her, astounded at her request, “do not cut their hair.”
Princesses didn’t do a great many things. People who thought it was fun should try it for a day or two. They should try sitting nicely through concerts, building openings, ceremonies for visiting dignitaries. They should try shaking hands with every single person in a receiving line and smiling for hours without stopping. They should try sitting through speeches at formal dinners, being the royal representative at the carefully selected weddings and funerals and baptisms and graduations of the important people. They should try meeting a million people and never really getting to know a single one of them.
Shoshauna had dreams that were not princess dreams at all. They were not even big dreams by the standards of the rest of the world, but they were her dreams. And if Ronan thought she wasn’t taking what had happened at the chapel seriously, he just didn’t get it.
She had given up on her dreams, felt as if they were being crushed like glass under her slippers with every step closer to the altar that she had taken.
But for some reason—maybe she had wished hard enough after all, maybe Retnuh was her protector from another world—she had been given this reprieve, and she felt as if she had to try and squeeze everything she had ever wanted into this tiny window of freedom.
She wanted to wear pants and shorts. She wanted to ride a motorcycle! She wanted to try surfing and a real bathing suit, not the swimming costume she was forced to wear at the palace. A person could drown if they ever got in real water, not a shallow swimming pool, in that getup.
There were other dreams that were surely never going to happen once she was married to the crown prince of an island country every bit as old-fashioned and traditional as B’Ranasha.
Decorum would be everything. She would wear the finest gowns, the best jewels, her manners would have to be forever impeccable, she would never be able to say what she really wanted. In short order she would be expected to stay home and begin producing babies.
But she wanted so desperately to sample life before she was condemned to that. Shoshauna wanted to taste snow. She wanted to go on a toboggan. She felt she had missed something essential: a boyfriend, like she had seen in movies. A boyfriend would be fun—someone to hold her hand, take her to movies, romance her. A husband was a totally different thing!
For a moment she had hoped she could talk Ronan into a least pretending, but she now saw that was unlikely.
Most of her dreams were unlikely.
Still, a miracle had happened. Here she was beside a handsome stranger in a stolen taxicab, when she should have been married to Prince Mahail by now. She’d known the prince since childhood and did not find him the least romantic, though many others did, including her silly cousin, Mirassa.
Mahail was absurdly arrogant, sure in his position of male superiority. Worse, he did not believe in her greatest dream of all.
Most of all, Shoshauna wanted to be educated, to learn glorious things, and not be restricted in what she was allowed to select for course material. She wanted to sit in classrooms with males and openly challenge the stupidity of their opinions. She wanted to learn to play chess, a game her mother said was for men only.
She knew herself to be a princess of very little consequence, the only daughter of a lesser wife, flying well under the radar of the royal watchdogs. She had spent a great deal of time, especially in her younger years, with her English grandfather and had thought one day she would study at a university in Great Britain.
With freedom that close, with her dreams so near she could taste them, Prince Mahail had spoiled it all, by choosing her as his bride. Why had he chosen her?
Mirassa had told her he’d been captivated by her hair! Suddenly she remembered how Mirassa had looked at her hair in that moment, how her eyes had darkened to black, and Shoshauna felt a shiver of apprehension.
Before Mahail had proposed to Shoshauna, rumor had flown that Mirassa was his chosen bride. He had flirted openly with her on several occasions, which on these islands was akin to publishing banns. Shoshauna had heard, again through the rumor mill, that Mirassa had asked to see him after he had proposed to Shoshauna and he had humiliated her by refusing her an appointment. Given that he had encouraged Mirassa’s affection in the first place, he certainly could have been more sensitive. Just how angry had Mirassa been?
Trust your instincts.
If she managed to cut her hair off before her return maybe Prince Mahail would lose interest in her as quickly as he had gained it and Mirassa would stop being jealous.
Being chosen for her hair was insulting, like being a head of livestock chosen for the way it looked: not for its heart or mind or soul!
The prince had taken his interest to her father, and she had felt as if her father had noticed her, really seen her for the very first time. His approval had been drugging. It had made her say yes when she had needed to say no!
Ronan came back to the car, dropped a bag on her lap, reached in and stowed a few more on the backseat. She noticed he had purchased clothing for himself and had changed out of the suit he’d worn. He was now wearing an open-throated shirt that showed his arms: rippling with well-defined muscle, peppered with hairs turned golden by the sun. And he was wearing shorts. She was not sure she had ever seen such a length of appealing male leg in all her life!
Faintly flustered, Shoshauna focused on the bag he’d given her. It held clothing. A large pair of very ugly sunglasses, a hideous hat, a blouse and skirt that looked like a British schoolmarm would be happy to wear.
No shorts. She felt like crying as reality collided with her fantasy.
“Where are the scissors?” she asked.
“Forgot,” he said brusquely, and she knew she could not count on him to make any of her dreams come true, to help her make the best use of this time she had been given.
He had a totally different agenda than her. To keep her safe. The last thing she wanted was to be safe. She wanted to be alive but in the best sense of that word.
She opened her car door.
“Where the hell are you going?”
“I’m going the hell in those bushes, changing into this outfit, as hideous as it is.”
“I don’t think princesses are supposed to change their clothes in the bushes,” he said. “Or say hell, for that matter. Just get in the car and I’ll find—”
“I’m changing now.” And then I’m going into that market and buying some things I want to wear. “And then I’m going into that market and finding the restroom.”
“Maybe since you’re in the bushes anyway, you could just—”
She stopped him with a look. His mouth snapped shut. He scowled at her, but even he, as unimpressed with her status as he apparently was, was not going to suggest she go to the bathroom in the bushes.
“Don’t peek,” she said, ducking into the thick shrubbery at the side of the road.
“Lord have mercy,” he muttered, whatever that meant.
CHAPTER TWO
RESIGNED, Ronan hovered in front of the bushes while she changed, trying to ignore the rustling sound of falling silk.
When she emerged, even he was impressed with how good his choices had been. Princess Shoshauna no longer looked like a member of the royal family, or even like a native to the island.
The women of B’Ranasha had gorgeous hair, their crowning glory. It swung straight and long, black and impossibly shiny past their shoulder blades, and was sometimes ornamented with fresh flowers, but never hidden.
The princess had managed to tuck her abundant locks up under that straw hat, the sunglasses covered the distinctive turquoise of those eyes, and she’d been entirely correct about his fashion sense.
The outfit he’d picked for her looked hideous in exactly the nondescript way he had hoped it would. The blouse was too big, the skirt was shapeless and dowdy, hanging a nice inch or so past her shapely knees. Except for the delicate slippers that showed off the daintiness of her tiny feet, she could have passed for an overweight British nanny on vacation.
As a disguise it was perfect: it hid who she really was very effectively. It worked for him, too. He had effectively covered her curves, made her look about as sexy as a refrigerator box. He knew the last thing he needed was to be too aware of her as a woman, and a beautiful one at that.
He accompanied her across the street, thankful for the sleepiness of the market at this time of day. “Try not to talk to anyone. The washrooms are at the back.”
His cell phone vibrated. “Five minutes,” he told her, checked the caller ID, felt relieved it was not his mother, though not a number he recognized, either. He watched through the open market door as she went straight to the back, then, certain of her safety, turned his attention to the phone.
“Yeah,” he said cautiously, not giving away his identity.
“Peterson.”
“That’s what I figured.”
“How did Aurora take the news that she’s going to have to go into hiding?”
“Happily waiting for her prince to come,” he said dryly, though he thought a less-true statement had probably never been spoken.
“Can you keep her that way for Neptune?”
Neptune was an exercise that Excalibur went on once a year. It was a week-long training in sea operations. Ronan drew in his breath sharply. A week? Even with the cleverness of the disguise she was in, that was going to be tough on so many levels. He didn’t know the island. Still, Gray would never ask a week of him if he didn’t absolutely need the time.
Surely the princess would know enough about the island to help him figure out a nice quiet place where they could hole up for a week?
Which brought him to how tough it was going to be on another level: a man and a woman holed up alone for a week. A gorgeous woman, despite the disguise, a healthy man, despite all his discipline.
“Can do.” He let none of the doubt he was feeling creep into his tone. He hoped the colonel would at least suggest where, but then realized it would be better if he didn’t, considering the possibility Gray’s team was not secure.
“We’ll meet at Harry’s. Neptune swim.”
Harry’s was a fish-and-chips-style pub the guys had frequented near Excalibur headquarters. The colonel was wisely using references no one but a member of the unit would understand. The Neptune swim was a grueling session in ocean swimming that happened at precisely 1500 hours every single day of the Neptune exercise. So, Ronan would meet Gray in one week, at a British-style pub, or a place that sold fish and chips, presumably close to the palace headquarters at 3 p.m.
“Gotcha.” He deliberately did not use communication protocol. “By the way, you need to check out a cousin. Mirassa.”
“Thanks. Destroy the phone,” the Colonel said.
Every cell phone had a global positioning device in it. Better to get rid of it, something Ronan had known all along he was going to have to do.
“Will do.”
He hung up the phone and peered in the market. The princess had emerged from the back, and was now going through racks of tourist clothing, in a leisurely manner, hangers of clothing already tossed over one arm. Thankfully, despite the darkness of the shop, she still had on the sunglasses.
He went into the shop, moved through the cluttered aisles toward her. If he was not mistaken, the top item of the clothing she had strung over her arm was a bikini, bright neon green, not enough material in it to make a handkerchief.
A week with that? He was disciplined, yes, a miracle worker, no. This was going to be a challenging enough assignment if he managed to keep her dressed like a refrigerator box!
He went up beside her, plucked the bikini off her arm, hung it up on the closest rack. “We’re not supposed to attract attention, Aurora. That doesn’t exactly fit the bill.”
“Aurora?”
“Your code name,” he said in an undertone.
“A code name,” she breathed. “I like it. Does it mean something?”
“It’s the name of the princess in ‘Sleeping Beauty.’”
“Well, I’m not waiting for my prince!”
“I gathered that,” he said dryly. He didn’t want to feel interested in what was wrong with her prince. It didn’t have anything to do with getting the job done. He told himself not to ask her why she dreaded marriage so much, and succeeded, for the moment. But he was aware he had a whole week with her to try to keep his curiosity at bay.
“Do you have a code name?” she asked.
He tried to think of the name of a celibate priest, but he wasn’t really up on his priests. “No. Let’s go.”
She glanced at him—hard to read her eyes through the sunglasses—but her chin tilted in a manner that did not bode well for him being the boss. She took the bikini back off the rack, tossed it back over her arm.
“I don’t have to wear it,” she said mulishly. “I just have to have it. Touch it again, and I’ll make a scene.” She smiled.
He glanced around uneasily. No other customers in the store, the single clerk, thankfully, far more interested in the daily racing form he was studying than he was in them.
“Let’s go,” he said in a low voice. “You have enough stuff there to last a year.”
“Maybe it will be a year,” she said, just a trifle too hopefully, confirming what he already knew—this was one princess not too eager to be kissed by a prince.
“I’ve had some instructions. A week. We need to disappear for a week.”
She grabbed a pair of shorty-shorts.
“We have to go.”
“I’m not finished.”
He took her elbow, glanced again at the clerk, guided her further back in the room. “Look, Princess, you have a decision to make.”
She spotted a bikini on the rack by his head. “I know!” she said, deliberately missing his point. “Pink or green?”
Definitely pink, but he forced himself to remain absolutely expressionless, pretended he was capable of ignoring the scrap of material she was waving in front of his face. Unfortunately, it was just a little too easy to imagine her in that, how the pink would set off the golden tones of her skin and the color of her eyes, how her long black hair would shimmer against it.
He took a deep breath.
“This is about your life,” he told her quietly. “Not mine. I’m not going to be more responsible for you than you are willing to be for yourself. So, if you want to take chances with your life, if you want to make my life difficult instead of cooperating, I’ll take you back to the palace right now.”
Despite the sunglasses, he could tell by the tightening of her mouth that she didn’t want to go back to the palace, so he pressed on.
“That would work better for me, actually,” he said. “I kind of fell into this. I signed up for wedding security, not to be your bodyguard. I have a commanding officer who’s going to be very unhappy with me if I don’t report back to work on Tuesday.”
He was bluffing. He wasn’t taking her back to the palace until Gray had sorted out who was responsible for the attack at the church. And Gray would look after getting word back to his unit that he had been detained due to circumstances beyond his control.
But she didn’t have to know that. And if he’d read her correctly, she’d been relieved that her wedding had been interrupted, delirious almost. The last thing she wanted to do was go back to her life, pick up where she’d left off.
He kept talking. “I’m sure your betrothed is very worried about you, anxious to make you his wife, so that he can keep you safe. He’s probably way more qualified to do that than I am.”
He could see, clearly, that he had her full attention, and that she was about as eager to get back to her prince as to swim with crocodiles.
So he said, “Maybe that’s the best idea. Head back, a quick secret ceremony, you and your prince can get off the island, have your honeymoon together, and this whole mess will be cleared up by the time you get home.”
His alertness to detail paid off now, because her body language radiated sudden tension. He actually felt a little bit sorry for her. She obviously didn’t want to get married, and if she had feelings for her fiancé they were not positive ones. But again he had to shut down any sense of curiosity or compassion that he felt. That wasn’t his problem, and in protection work, that was the priority: to remember his business—the very narrow perimeters of keeping her safe—and to not care anything about what was her business.
Whether she was gorgeous, ugly, unhappy at love, frustrated with her life, none of that mattered to him. Or should matter to him.
Still, he did feel the tiniest little shiver of unwanted sympathy as he watched her getting paler before his eyes. He was glad for her sunglasses, because he didn’t want to see her eyes just now. She put the pink bikini back, thankfully, but turned and marched to the counter as if she was still the one in charge, as if he was her servant left to trail behind her—and pay the bills.
Apparently paying had not occurred to her. She had probably never had to handle money or even a credit card in her whole life. She would put it on account, or some member of her staff would look after the details for her.
She seemed to realize that at the counter, and he could have embarrassed her, but there was no point, and he certainly did not want the clerk to find anything memorable about this transaction.
“I got it, sweetheart,” he said easily.
Though playing sweethearts had been her idea, she was flustered by it. She looked everywhere but at him. Then, without warning, she reached up on tiptoe and kissed him on the cheek.
“Thanks, Charming,” she said huskily, obviously deciding he needed a code name that matched hers.
But a less-likely prince had never been born, and he knew it.
He hoped the clerk wouldn’t look up, because there might be something memorable about seeing a man blushing because his supposed lady friend had kissed him and used an odd endearment on him.
Ronan didn’t make it worse by looking at her, but he felt a little stunned by the sweetness of her lips on his cheek, by the utter softness, the sensuality of a butterfly’s wings.
“Oh, look,” she said softly, suddenly breathless. She was tapping a worn sign underneath the glass on the counter.
“Motorcycles for rent. Hour, day, week.”
It would be the last time he’d be able to use this credit card, so maybe, despite his earlier rejection of the idea, now was the time to change vehicles. Was it a genuinely good idea or had that spontaneous kiss on the cheek rattled him?
He’d already nixed the motorcycle idea in his own mind. Why was he revisiting the decision?
Was he losing his edge? Finding her just too distracting? He had to do his job, to make decisions based solely on what was most likely to bring him to mission success, which was keeping her safe. Getting stopped in a stolen car was not going to do that. Blending in with the thousands of tourists that scootered around this island made more sense.
Since talking to Gray, he wondered if the whole point of the threats against the princess had been to stop the wedding, not harm her personally.
But he knew he couldn’t let his guard down because of that. He had to treat the threat to her safety as real, or there would be too many temptations to treat it lightly, to let his guard down, to let her get away with things.
“Please?” she said softly, and then she tilted her sunglasses down and looked at him over the rims.
Her eyes were stunning, the color and depth of tropical waters, filled at this moment with very real pleading, as if she felt her life depended on getting on that motorcycle.
Half an hour later, he had a backpack filled with their belongings, he had moved the car off the road into the thick shrubs beside it and he was studying the motorcycle. It was more like a scooter than a true motorcycle.
He took a helmet from a rack beside the motorcycles.
“Come here.”
“I don’t want to wear that! I want to feel the wind in my hair.”
He had noticed hardly anyone on the island did wear motorcycle helmets, probably because the top speed of these little scooters would be about eighty kilometers an hour. Still, acquiring the motorcycle felt a bit like giving in, and he was done with that. His job was to keep her safe in every situation. Life could be cruelly ironic, he knew. It would be terrible to protect her from an assassin and then get her injured on a motorbike.
“Please, Charming?” she said.
That had worked so well last time, she was already trying it again! It served him right for allowing himself to be manipulated by her considerable charm.
She took off her sunglasses and blinked at him. He could see the genuine yearning in her eyes, but knew he couldn’t cave in. This was a girl who was, no doubt, very accustomed to people jumping to make her happy, to wrapping the whole world around her pinky finger.
“Charming isn’t a good code name for me,” he said.
“Why not?”
“Because I’m not. Charming. And I’m certainly not a prince.” To prove both, he added, sternly, “Now, come here and put on the helmet.”
“Are you wearing one?”
He didn’t answer, just lifted his eyebrow at her, the message clear. She could put on the helmet or she could go home.
Mutinously she snatched the straw hat from her head.
He tried not to let his shock show. In those few unsupervised minutes while he had talked to Gray on the phone, she had gone to the washroom, all right, but not for the reason he had thought or she had led him to believe. Where had she gotten her hands on a pair of scissors? Or maybe, given the raggedness of the cut, she had used a knife.
She was no hairdresser, either. Little chunks of her black hair stood straight up on her head, going every which way. The bangs were crooked. Her ears were tufted. There wasn’t a place where her hair was more than an inch and a half long. Her head looked like a newly hatched chicken, covered in dark dandelion fluff. It should have looked tragic.
Instead, she looked adorable, carefree and elfish, a rebel, completely at odds with the conservative outfit he had picked for her. Without the distraction of her gorgeous hair, it was apparent that her bone structure was absolutely exquisite, her eyes huge, her lips full and puffy.
“Where’s your hair?” he asked, fighting hard not to let his shock show. He shoved the helmet on her head quickly, before she had any idea how disconcerting he found her new look. His fingers fumbled on the strap buckle, he was way too aware of her, and not at all pleased with his awareness. The perfume he’d caught a whiff of at the wedding tickled his nostrils.
“I cut it.”
“I can clearly see that.” Thankfully, the mysteries of the helmet buckle unraveled, he tightened the strap, let his hands fall away. He was relieved the adorable mess of her hair was covered. “What did you do with it after you cut it?”
Her contrite expression told him she had left it where it had fallen.
“So, you did it for nothing,” he said sternly. “Now, when we’re traced this far, and we will be, they’ll find out you cut your hair. And they’ll be looking for a bald girl, easier to spot than you were before.”
“I’m not bald,” she protested.
“I’ve seen better haircuts on new recruits,” he said. She looked crestfallen, he told himself he didn’t care. But he was aware he did, just a little bit.
“I’ll go back and pick up my hair,” she said.
“Never mind. Hopefully no one is going to see you.”
“Does it look that bad?”
He could reassure her it didn’t, but that was something Prince Charming might do. “It looks terrible.”
He hoped she wasn’t going to cry. She put her sunglasses back on a little too rapidly. Her shoulders trembled tellingly.
Don’t be a jerk, he told himself. But then he realized he might be a lot safer in this situation if she did think he was a jerk.
When had his focus switched from her safety to his own?
Rattled, he pushed ahead. “I need you to think very carefully,” he said. “Is there a place on this island we can go where no one would find us for a week?”
He tried not to close his eyes after he said it. A week with her, her new haircut and her new green bikini stuffed in the backpack. Not to mention the shorty-shorts, and a halter top that had somehow been among her purchases.
He could see in her eyes she yearned for things that were forbidden to her, things she might not even be totally aware of, things that went far beyond riding on motorcycles and cutting her hair.
Things her husband should be teaching her. Right this minute. He had no right to be feeling grateful that she had not been delivered into the hands of a man she’d dreaded discovering those things with.
Instead she’d been delivered into his hands. One mission: keep her safe. Even from himself.
Still, he was aware he was a warrior, not a saint. The universe was asking way too much of him.
He turned from her swiftly, got on the motorcycle, persuaded it to life. He patted the seat behind him, not even looking at her.
But not looking at her didn’t help. She slid onto the seat behind him. The skirt hiked way up. Out of his peripheral vision he could see the nakedness of her knee. He glanced back. The skirt was riding high up her thigh.
It was a princess like no one had ever seen, of that he was certain. On the other hand, no one would be likely to recognize her looking like this, either.
“Hang on tight,” he said.
And then he felt her sweet curves pull hard against him. Oh, sure. For once she was going to listen!
“I know a place,” she called into his ear. “I know the perfect place.”
His cell phone vibrated in his pocket. He slowed, checked the caller ID. His mother. He wrestled an impulse to answer, to yell at her, Don’t do it! Instead he listened to her leave yet another voice mail.
“Ronan, call me. It’s so exciting.”
They were crossing over a bridge, rushing water below, and he took the phone and flung it into the water.
He was in the protection business; sometimes it felt as if the whole world was his responsibility. But the truth was he could not now, and never had been able to, protect his own mother from what she most needed protecting from.
Herself.
Shoshauna pressed her cheek up against the delicious hardness of Ronan’s shoulder. His scent, soapy and masculine, was stronger than the scent of the new shirt.
Alone with him for a week. In a place where no one could find them. It felt dangerous and exciting and terribly frightening, too. She pressed into him, feeling far more endangered than she had when the gun had gone off in the chapel.
Some kind of trembling had started inside her, and it was not totally because he had hurt her feelings telling her her hair looked terrible. It wasn’t totally because of the vibration of the motorbike, either!
“Go faster,” she cried.
He glanced over his shoulder at her.
“It doesn’t go any faster,” he shouted back at her, but he gave it a hit of gas and the little bike surged forward.
Her stomach dropped, and she squealed with delight.
He glanced back again. His lips were twitching. He was trying not to smile. But he did, and his smile was like the sun coming out on the grayest of days. That glimpse of a smile made her forget she had only a short time to squeeze many dreams into, though a week was more than she could have hoped for.
Still, it was as if his smile hypnotized her and made her realize maybe there was one dream he could help make come true. A dream more important than wearing shorts or riding astride or touching snow. A dream that scorned people who pretended all the time.
She had only a few days, and she wanted to be with someone who was real, not kowtowing. Not anxious to please. Not afraid of her position. Someone who would tell her the truth, even if it hurt to hear it.
I’m not going to be more responsible for you than you are willing to be for yourself, he had told her. She shivered. In that simple statement, as much as it had pained her to hear it, was the truth about how her life had gone off track so badly. Could Ronan somehow lead her back to what was real about herself?
When she was younger, there’d been a place she had been allowed to go where she had felt real. Relaxed. As if it was okay to be herself.
Herself—something more and more lost behind the royal mask, the essential facades of good manners, of duty. Something that might be lost forever when she was returned to Prince Mahail as his bride.
“There’s an island,” she called over the putter of the engine. “My grandparents have a summer place on a small island just north of the mainland. No one is ever there at this time of year.”
“No one? No security? No groundskeeper?”
“It’s a private island, but not the posh kind. You’d have to know my grandfather to understand. He hates all the royal fuss-fuss as he calls it. He likes simplicity.
“The island is almost primitive. There’s no electricity, the house is like a cottage, it even has a thatched roof.”
“Fresh water, or do we have to bring our own?”
“There’s a stream.” Ronan thought like a soldier, she realized. All she could think about was it would be such a good place to try on her new bikini, such a wonderful place to rediscover who she really was! But, given the strange trembling inside her, how wise would that be? Given the reality of his smile, the pure sexiness of it, was it possible she was headed into a worse danger zone than the one she was leaving?
“Bedding? Blankets?”
His mind, thankfully, a million miles from bikinis, on the more practical considerations. “I think so.”
“How do you get to it?”
“My grandfather keeps a boat at the dock across the bay from it.”
“Perfect,” he said. “Show me the fastest way to the boat dock.”
But she didn’t tell him the shortest way. She directed him the longest way possible, because who knew if she would ever ride a motorcycle again, her arms wrapped so intimately around a man with such an incredible, sexy smile?
She loved the motorcycle, even if she had been deprived of feeling the fingers of the wind playing with her hair. She could still feel the island breeze on her face, playing with the hem of her skirt, touching her legs. She could feel the kiss of warm sunshine. She had a lovely sensation of being connected to everything around her. The air was perfumed, birds and monkeys chattered in the trees. She didn’t feel separate from it, she felt like a part of it.
And she could feel the exquisite sensation of being connected to him—her arms wrapped around the hard-muscled bands of his stomach, her cheek resting on the solid expanse of his back, her legs forming a rather intimate vee around him.
Her mother, she knew, would have an absolute fit. And her father wouldn’t be too happy with her, either. She could only imagine how Mahail would feel if he saw her now!
Which only added to the delectable sense of dancing with danger that Princess Shoshauna was feeling: free, adventurous, as if anything at all could happen.
Just this morning her whole life had seemed to be mapped out in front of her, her fate inescapable. Now she had hair that Prince Mahail would hate, and she didn’t think he’d like it very much that she had spent a week alone with a strange man, either!
“Can you go faster?’ she called to Ronan over the wind.
The slightest hesitation, and then he did, opening the bike up so that they were roaring down the twisting highway, until tears formed in her eyes and she could feel the thrill to the bottom of her belly.
She refused to dwell on how long it would last, or if this was the only time she would ever do this.
Instead she threw back her head and laughed out loud for the sheer joy of the moment, at her unexpected encounter with the most heady drug of all—freedom.
CHAPTER THREE
RONAN cut the engine of the motorboat, letting it drift in to the deserted beach. He glanced at the princess, asleep in the bottom of the boat, exhausted from the day, and decided there was no need for both of them to get wet. He stood up, stepped off the hull into a gentle surf. The seawater was warm on his legs as he dragged the boat up onto the sand.
It was night, but the sky was breathtaking, star-studded. A full moon frosted each softly lapping wave in white and painted the fine beach sand a bewitching shade of silver.
From a soldier’s perspective, the island was perfect. Looking back across the water, he could barely make out the dark outline of the main island of B’Ranasha. He could see the odd light flickering on that distant shore.
He had circled this island once in the boat, a rough reconnaissance. It was only about eight kilometers all the way around it. Better yet, it had only this one protected bay, and only the one beach suitable for landing a boat.
Everywhere else the thick tropical growth, or rocky cliffs, came right to the water’s edge. The island was too small and bushed in to land a plane on. It would be a nightmare to parachute in to, and it would be a challenge to land a helicopter here. Planes and helicopters gave plenty of warning they were arriving, anyway.
It was a highly defensible position. Perfect from a soldier’s perspective.
But from a personal point of view, from a man’s perspective, it couldn’t be much worse. It was a deserted island more amazing than a movie set. The sand was white, fine and flawless, exotic birds filled the night air with music, a tantalizing perfume rode the gentle night breeze. Palm trees swayed in the wind, ferns and flowers abounded.
At the head of the beach was a cottage, palm-frond roof, screened porch looking out to the sea. It was the kind of retreat people came to on holidays and honeymoons, not to hide out. Which was a good thing. He highly doubted anyone would think to look for the princess here.
He gave the rope attached to the boat another pull, hauled it further up on the sand until he was satisfied it would be safe, even from the tide, which, according to the tide charts he had purchased at a small seaside village, would come up during the night.
Only then did he peer back at Aurora, his very own Sleeping Beauty. The princess, worn down from all the unscheduled excitement of her wedding day, was curled up in the bottom of the boat, fast asleep on a bed of life jackets.
The silver of the moon washed her in magic, though he felt the shock of her shorn head again, followed by a jolt of a different kind—the short hair did nothing but accentuate her loveliness. Right now he was astonished by the length and fullness of her lashes, casting sooty shadows on the roundness of her cheeks. Her lips moved, forming words in her sleep, something in her own language, ret-nuh.
He’d insisted on a life jacket, but the skirt was riding high up her legs, he caught a glimpse of bridal white panties so pure he could feel a certain dryness in his mouth. He reached out and gave the skirt a tug down, whether to save her embarrassment or to save himself he wasn’t quite sure.
A deserted island. A beautiful woman. A week. He was no math whiz, but he knew a bad equation when he came across it.
He’d done plenty of protection duty, and though it wasn’t his favorite assignment, Ronan prided himself on doing his work well. He’d protected heads of states and their families, politicians, royalty, CEOs.
The person being protected was known amongst the team as the “principal.” The team didn’t even use personal names when they discussed strategy, formulated plans. The cardinal rule, the constant in protection work, was maintaining a completely professional, arm’s-length relationship. Emotional engagement compromised the mission, period.
But the very circumstances of those other assignments made maintaining professionalism easy. The idea of forming any kind of deeper relationship or even a friendship, with the principal had been unthinkable. There was always a team, never just one person. There was always an environment conducive to maintaining preordained boundaries.
Ronan was in brand-new territory, and he didn’t like it. So, before he woke her up, he looked to the stars, gathered his strength, reminded himself of the mission, the boundaries, the rules.
“Hey,” he called softly, finally, “wake up.”
She stirred but didn’t wake, and he leaned into the boat and nudged her shoulder with his hand. She was slender as a reed, the roundness of her shoulder the epitome of feminine softness.
“Princess.” It would be infinitely easy to reach in and scoop her up, to carry her across the sand to that cottage, but that brief contact with her shoulder was fair warning it would be better not to add one little bit of physical contact to the already volatile combination.
A bad time to think of her lips on his cheek earlier in the day, her slight curves pressed hard against him on that motorcycle.
“Wake up,” he said louder, more roughly.
She did, blinked—that blank look of one who couldn’t quite place where they were. And then she focused on him and smiled in a way that could melt even the most professional soldier’s dedication to absolute duty.
She sat up, looked around and then sighed with contentment. She liked being here. She had liked the entire day way too much! He had not been nearly as immune to her laughter and her arms wrapped around him as he had wanted to be, but thankfully she didn’t have to know that!
She shrugged out of the life jacket and then stretched, pressing the full sensuous roundness of her breasts into the thin fabric of the ill-fitting blouse. Then she stood up. The boat rocked on the sand, and the physical contact he wanted so badly not to happen, happened anyway. He caught her, steadied her as the boat rocked on the uneven ground. She took one more step, the boat pitched, and she would have gone to her knees.
Except his hands encircled her waist nearly completely, the thumb and index finger of his right hand nearly touching those of his left. He lifted her from the boat, swung her onto the sand, amazed by her slightness. She didn’t weigh any more than a fully loaded combat pack.
“You’re strong!” she said.
He withdrew from her swiftly, not allowing himself to preen under her admiration. A week. They had to make it a week.
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” she asked, hugging herself, apparently oblivious to his discomfort. “I love it here. My grandfather called it Naidina Karobin—it means something like my heart is home.”
Great.
“Isn’t that pretty?”
“Yeah, sure.” Real men didn’t use words like pretty. Except maybe in secret, when they looked at a face like hers, washed in moonlight, alive with discovery. Mission.
He reached into the boat and grabbed the knapsack. As he followed her across the sand toward the cottage, he noted that the trees in the grove around it were loaded with edible fruits, coconuts, bananas, mangos.
He’d landed in the Garden of Eden. He only hoped he could resist the apple. Boundaries.
As they got closer, the princess jacked her skirt up and ran, danced really, across the sand. She looked like some kind of moonlit nymph, her slender legs painted in silver. Rules, duty, professionalism.
He followed her more slowly, as if he could put off the moment when they set up housekeeping together and everything intensified yet more.
Becoming part of Excalibur, Ronan’s endurance, physical strength, intellectual assets, ability to cope with stress had all been tested beyond normal limits. One man in twenty who was recruited for that unit made it through the selection process. Membership meant being stronger, faster, tougher in mind and spirit than the average man.
And yet to share the space of that cottage on this island with a real-live sleeping beauty seemed as if it would test him in ways he had never been tested before.
Ronan had been in possession of the princess for less than twenty-four hours and he already felt plenty tested!
He drew a deep breath as he followed her up wide steps to the screen door that he thought had been a screened-in veranda. As his eyes adjusted to the lack of moonlight inside, he saw he had been mistaken.
It was not a screened porch, but a screened-in house. A summer house, she’d said, obviously designed so that it caught the breeze from every angle on hot summer nights. The huge overhang of the roof would protect it from the rare days of inclement weather these islands experienced.
White, sheer curtains lifted and fell in the breeze, making the inside of the house enchanting and exotic. The main room had dark, beautiful wooden floors, worn smooth from years of use, moonlight spilling across them. Deeply cushioned, colorful rattan furniture was grouped casually around a coffee table, a space that invited conversation, relaxation.
Intimacy.
At the other end of the room was a dining area, the furniture old, dark, exquisitely carved and obviously valuable. That such good furniture would be left out in an unlocked cottage should have reassured him how safe the island was. But Ronan was a little too aware that the dangers here could come from within, not without.
The screens as walls gave a magnificent illusion of there being no separation between the indoor living space and the outdoors.
He spied a hurricane lamp and lit it, hoping the light would chase away the feeling of enchantment, but instead, in the flickering golden light, the great room became downright romantic, soft, sultry, sensual.
The light was soft on her face, too, her expression rapt as she looked around, her eyes glowing with the happiness of memories.
Ronan would have liked it a lot better if she was spoiled rotten, complaining about spiderwebs and the lack of electricity.
To distance himself from the unwanted whoosh of attraction he felt, Ronan went hurriedly across the room to investigate a door at the back of it. It led to an outdoor kitchen, and he went out. The outdoor cooking space was complete with a huge wood-fired oven and a grill. Open shelves were lined with canned goods. A person could camp out here, on this island, comfortably, for a year.
Beyond that, in a flower- and fern-encircled grove was an open-air shower, and the whoosh he’d been trying to outrun came back.
He reentered the house reluctantly, thankful he didn’t see her right away. He finished his inventory of the main house: there were two rooms off the great room, and he entered the first. It was the main bedroom, almost entirely taken up by a huge bed framed with soaring rough timbers, dark with age, more sheer white curtains flowing around the bed, surrounding it. Again the screens acting as outer walls made the bed seem to be set right amongst the palms and mango trees. The perfume of a thousand different flowers tickled his nose. There was no barrier to sound, either. The sea whispered poetry. He backed hastily out of there.
Princess Shoshauna was in the smaller of the bedrooms, looking around and hugging herself.
“This is where I always stayed when I was a child! Look how it feels as if you are right outside! My grandfather designed this house. He was an architect. That’s how he came to be on B’Ranasha. I’ll have this room.”
He would have much preferred she take the bigger room, act snotty and entitled so he could kill the whoosh in his stomach.
“I think you should take the bigger room,” he suggested. “You are the princess.”
“Not this week I’m not.” She smiled, delighted to have declared herself not a princess.
If she wasn’t a princess, if she was just an ordinary girl…he cut off the train of his thought. It didn’t matter if she was a wandering gypsy. She was still the principal, and it was still his mission to protect her.
He reached into his pocket, took out a pocketknife and cut the cord that kept the mattress rolled up. He found the bedding in a tightly closed trunk under the bed. A floral sachet had been packed with it, and the white linen sheets smelled exotic.
He laid them quickly on the bed, then watched, bemused, when she eyed the pile of bedding as though it were an interesting but baffling jigsaw puzzle.
“You don’t know how to make a bed,” he guessed, incredulous, then wondered why it would surprise him that a princess had no idea how to make a bed.
The truth was, it would be way too easy to forget she was a princess, especially with her standing there with shorn hair, and in a badly rumpled and ill-fitting dress.
But that was exactly what he had to remember, to keep his boundaries clear, his professionalism unsullied, his duty foremost in his mind. She was a princess, a real one. He was a soldier. Their stations in life were millions of miles apart. And they were going to stay that way.
“My mother would never have allowed it,” she said, sadly. “She had this idea that to do things that could be done by servants was common. Of course, she was a commoner, and she never quite overcame her insecurity about it.”
She didn’t know how to make a bed.
Every soldier had been tormented, at one time or another, with making a bed that could satisfy a drill sergeant who had no intention of being satisfied. Ronan could make a bed—perfectly—anywhere, anytime.
To focus on the differences between them would strengthen his will. To perceive her as pampered and useless would go a long way in erasing the memory of her slender curves pressed into his back as they rode that motorcycle together.
“I’d be happy to make it for you, Princess,” he said.
She glared at him. “I don’t want you to make it for me! I want you to show me how to make it.”
He was tired. He had not had the benefit of a two hour nap in the bottom of the boat. She had slept for an hour or so before that, as well, while they had waited, hidden, for it to get dark enough to take her grandfather’s boat from the dock and cross the water without being seen.
It would be easier for him to make the bed himself, but he had to get through a full week, and that wasn’t going to be easy if he argued with her over little things.
His eyes went to the full puffiness of her lips, and he felt his own weariness, his resolve flickering.
He had to get though a full week without kissing her, too.
Making a bed together didn’t seem like a very good starting point for keeping things professional and distant. Neither did fighting with her.
He had the uneasy feeling he’d better adjust to being put in no-win positions by the princess.
He separated the sheets from the blankets, found the bottom sheet and tossed it over the mattress.
“First you tuck this under the mattress,” he said.
“I’ll do it!” she said, when he reached out to demonstrate.
He held up his hands in surrender, stood back, tried not to wince at her sloppy corners, the slack fabric in the center of the bed. He didn’t offer to help as she grunted over lifting the corners of the mattress.
He handed her the second sheet, tried to stay expressionless as she shoved it under the bottom of the mattress in such a bunched-up mess that the mattress lifted.
She caught the tip of her tongue between her teeth as she focused with furious concentration on the task at hand. He folded his arms firmly over his chest.
She inserted the pillows in the cases with the seams in the wrong places and fluffed them. Then he handed her the top blanket, which she tossed haphazardly on top of the rest of her mess.
The bed was a buck private’s nightmare, but she smiled with pleasure at her final result. To his eye, it looked more like a nest than a well-made bed.
“See?” she said. “I can do ordinary things.”
“Yes,” he said, deadpan. “I can clearly see that.”
Something in his tone must have betrayed him, because she searched his face with grave suspicion.
A drill sergeant would have had the thrill of ripping it apart and making her do it again, but he wasn’t a drill sergeant. In fact, at the moment he was just an ordinary guy, trying to survive.
“Okay,” he said, “if you have everything—”
“Oh, I’ll make yours, too. For practice.”
“What do you need practice making a bed for?” he asked crankily. He didn’t want her touching his bedding.
He was suddenly acutely aware of how alone they were here, of how the dampness of the sea air was making the baggy dress cling to her, of how her short hair was curling slightly from humidity, and there seemed to be a dewy film forming on her skin. He was aware of how her tongue had looked, caught between her teeth.
Ignoring him, she marched right by him into his room. He trailed behind her reluctantly, watched as she opened the trunk where the linens were kept and began tossing them on his bed.
“I’m going to do all kinds of ordinary things this week,” she announced.
“Such as?” He didn’t offer to help her make the bed, just watched, secretly aghast at the mess she was making.
“Cooking!” she decided.
“I can hardly wait.”
He got the suspicious look again.
“Washing dishes. Doing laundry. You can show me those things, can’t you?”
She sounded so enthused he thought she must be pulling his leg, but he could tell by the genuine eager expression on her face she really wasn’t.
How did a man maintain professional distance from a princess who wanted nothing more than to be an ordinary girl, who was enthralled at the prospect of doing the most ordinary of things?
He nodded cautiously.
“I would like to learn how to sew on a button,” she decided. “Do you know how to do that?”
Sewing buttons, insignia, pant hems, was right up there with making beds in a soldier’s how-to arsenal, but she didn’t wait for him to answer.
“And I can’t wait to swim in the ocean! I used to swim here when I was a child. I love it!”
He thought of that bikini in their backpack, closed his eyes, marshaling strength.
“You don’t happen to know how to surf, do you?” she asked him. “There used to be a surfboard under the cottage. I hope it’s still there!”
His boyhood days had been spent on a surfboard. It was probably what had saved him from delinquency, his love of the waves, his need to perfect the dance with the extraordinary, crashing power of them.
“This bay doesn’t look like it would ever get much in the way of surf,” he told her. “It’s pretty protected.”
She looked disappointed, but then brightened. “There’s snorkeling equipment under there, too. Maybe we can do that.”
We, as if they were two kids together on vacation. Now would be the time to let her know he had no intention of being her playmate, but he held his tongue.
She gave his bed a final, satisfied pat. “Well, good night Ronan. I can’t wait for tomorrow.” She blew him a kiss, which was only slightly better than the one she had planted on his cheek earlier in the day.
He rubbed his cheek, aggravated, as if the kiss had actually landed, an uncomfortably whimsical thought for a man who prided himself on his pragmatic nature. He listened for her to get into her own bed, then went on silent feet and checked each side of the cabin.
The night was silent, except for the night birds. The ocean was dark and still, the only lights were from the moon and stars, the few lights on the mainland had winked out.
He went back into his bedroom. He knew he needed to sleep, that it would help him keep his thinking clear and disciplined. He also knew he had acquired, over the years, that gift peculiar to soldiers of sleeping in a state of readiness. Any sound that didn’t belong would awaken him instantly. His highly developed sixth sense would guard them both through the night.
He shrugged out of his shirt but left the shorts on. He certainly didn’t want her to ever see him in his underwear, and he might have to get out of bed quickly in the night. He climbed into bed. It had to be his imagination that her perfume lingered on the sheets. Still, tired as he was, he tossed and turned until finally, an hour later, he got out of the bed, remade it perfectly. He got back in and slept instantly.
Shoshauna awoke to light splashing across her bed, birdsong, the smell and sound of the sea.
She remembered she was on her grandfather’s island and thought to herself, my heart is home. She remembered her narrow escape from marriage, the unexpected gifts yesterday: riding the motorcycle, buying the daring bathing suit and shorty-shorts.
Kissing Ronan on the cheek. Feeling the muscles of his back as they shared the motorcycle, feeling his hands encircle her waist.
Ronan was a gloriously made man, all hard muscle, graceful efficiency of movement, easy, unconscious strength, a certain breathtaking confidence in his physical abilities. Add to that the soft, firm voice, his accent. And his eyes! A soldier’s eyes to be sure, stern, forbidding even. But when the mask slipped, when they glinted with laughter, she felt this uncontrollable—and definitely wicked—shiver of pure wanting. He made her feel such an amazing mixture of things: excited and shy, aggravated, annoyed, alive.
Shoshauna knew it was wrong to be thinking like that. She was promised to another. And yet…if you could pick a man to spend a week on a deserted island with, you would pick a man like Ronan.
She gave her head a shake at the naughty direction of her own thoughts and realized her head felt unnaturally light and then remembered she had cut her hair.
She had glimpsed her hair in the mirror of the motorcycle. Now she hopped out of bed and had a good look in the mirror above the dressing table.
“Oh!” she said, touching her fingers to it. It looked awful, crushed in places from sleep, standing straight up in others. Despite that, she decided she loved it. It made her look like a girl who would never back down from an adventure, not a princess who had spent her life in a tower, at least figuratively speaking! In fact, she felt in love with life this morning, excited about whatever new gifts the day held. Excited about a chance to get to know Ronan better.
But wasn’t that a betrayal of the man she was promised to?
Not necessarily, she told herself. This was her opportunity to be ordinary!
She realized she had not felt this way—happy, hopeful—since she had said yes to Prince Mahail’s proposal. Up till now she had woken up each and every morning with a knot in her stomach that shopping for the world’s most luxurious trousseau could not begin to undo. She had woken each morning with a growing sense of dread, a prisoner counting down to their date with the gallows.
Her stomach dipped downward, reminding her that her reprieve was probably temporary at best.
But she refused to think of that now, to waste even one precious moment of her freedom.
Ronan had left the backpack in her room, and she pawed through it, found the shorty-shorts and a red, spaghetti-strapped shirt that hugged her curves. She put on the outfit and twirled in front of the mirror, her sense of being an ordinary girl increased sweetly.
Her mother would have hated both the amount of leg showing and the skimpiness of the top, which made Shoshauna enjoy her outfit even more. She liked the way lots of bare skin against warm air felt: free, faintly sensual and very comfortable.
She went out her door, saw his bedroom was already empty. She stopped when she saw his bed was made, hesitated, then went in and inspected it. The bedding was crisp and taut. She backed out when she realized the room smelled like him: something so masculine and rich it was nearly drugging.
She went back to her own room, tugged the rumpled bedding into some semblance of order, declared herself and the room perfectly wonderfully ordinary and went in search of Ronan.
He was at the outdoor kitchen, a basket of fruit beside him that he was peeling and cutting into chunks. She watched him for a moment, enjoying the pure poetry of him performing such a simple task, and then blushed when he glanced at her and lifted an eyebrow. He had known she stood there observing him!
Still, there was a flash of something in his eyes as he took in her outfit, before it was quickly veiled, a barrier swiftly erected. And there was no hint of that flash in his voice.
“Princess,” he said formally, “did you sleep well?”
It was several giant steps back from the man who had laughed with her yesterday. She wanted to break down the barrier she saw in his eyes. What good was being an ordinary girl if it was as if she was on this island alone? If her intrigue with this man was not shared?
“You must call me Shoshauna,” she said.
“I can’t.”
She glared at him. “I command it.”
He actually laughed out loud, the same laugh that had given her her first glimpse yesterday of just how real he could be, making her yearn to know him, know someone real.
“Command away, Princess. I’m not calling you by your first name.”
“Why?”
“It’s too familiar. I’m your bodyguard, not your buddy.”
She felt the sting of that. Her disappointment was acute. He wanted the exact opposite of what she wanted! She wanted to feel close to another human being, he wanted to feel distant. She wanted to use this time together to explore his mysteries, he was just as determined to keep them secret.
It was frustrating! Her mother would approve of his attitude, a man who knew his place and was so determined to keep their different positions as a barrier between them.
But so would her grandmother love him. Her grandmother said soldiers made the best husbands, because they already knew how to obey. Not that he was showing any sign of obeying Shoshauna!
And not that she wanted to be thinking of this handsome man and the word husband in the same sentence. She had just narrowly missed making marriage her fate.
Still, she wanted him to participate in the great adventure she was on. How could she forget she was a princess, forget her obligations and duties for a short while, if he was going to insist on reminding her at every turn by using a formal title?
“How about my code name, then?” she asked.
He hesitated, glanced at her, shrugged. She couldn’t tell if it was agreement or appeasement, though whichever it was, she sensed it was a big concession from him, he suddenly refused to look at her, took an avid interest in the fruit in front of him.
“I’ll do that,” she said, moving up beside him. Did he move a careful step away from her? She moved closer. He moved away again and without looking at her, passed her a little tiny knife and a mango.
“Don’t cut your fingers off,” he said dryly.
She watched for a moment as his own fingers handled the knife, removed a fine coil of peel from the fruit. He caught her watching him, again, put down the knife and turned away from her to put wood in the oven.
“What are we going to make in there?” she asked eagerly.
“I’m going to make biscuits.”
“I want to learn!”
“What for?”
“It seems like it would be a useful skill,” she said stubbornly.
“It is a useful skill. For someone like me, who frequently finds himself trying to make the best of rough circumstances. But for a princess?” He shook his head.
“I want to know useful things!”
“What is useful in your world and what is useful in mine are two very different things,” he said almost gently.
Rebelliously she attacked the mango with her knife. Ten minutes later as she looked at the sliver of fruit in front of her, what was left of her mango, she realized he was probably right. Domestication at this late date was probably hopeless. She felt sticky to the elbow, and had managed to get juice in her eye. The mango was mangled beyond recognition.
She cast him a look. Ronan was taking golden-brown biscuits off a griddle above the stove. The scent of them made her mouth water.
“Here,” she said, handing him the remnants of her mango. He took it wordlessly, his face a careful blank, and added it to the plate of fruit he had prepared.
She thought they’d take the food inside to the dining table, but he motioned her over to a little stone bench, set the plate down between them, lifted his face to the morning sun as he picked up a piece of fruit.
She followed his example and picked up a slice of fruit and a biscuit with her fingers.
Shoshauna had dined on the finest foods in the world. She had eaten at the fanciest tables of B’Ranasha, using the most exquisite china and cutlery. But she felt as if she had never tasted food this fine or enjoyed flavor so much.
She decided she loved everything, absolutely everything, about being an ordinary girl. And she hadn’t given up on herself in the domestic department yet, either!
CHAPTER FOUR
AFTER a few minutes Shoshauna couldn’t help but notice that her pleasure in the simplicity of the breakfast feast seemed to be entirely one-sided.
Ronan, while obviously enjoying the sunshine and eating with male appetite, seemed pensive, turned in on himself, as anxious not to connect with her as she was to connect with him.
“Are you enjoying breakfast?” she asked, craving conversation, curious about this man who had become her protector.
He nodded curtly.
She realized she was going to have to be more direct! “Tell me about yourself,” she invited.
He shot her a look, looked away. “There’s nothing to tell. I’m a soldier. That means my life is ninety-nine percent pure unadulterated boredom.”
She supposed you didn’t learn to make a bed like that if you led a life of continuous excitement, but she knew he was fudging the truth. She could tell, from the way he carried himself, from the calm with which he had handled things yesterday that he dealt with danger as comfortably as most men dealt with the reading of the morning paper.
“And one percent what?” she asked when it became apparent he was going to add nothing voluntarily.
“All hell breaking loose.”
“Oh!” she said genuinely intrigued. “All hell breaking loose! That sounds exciting.”
“I wish you wouldn’t say that word,” he said, ignoring her implied invitation to share some of his most exciting experiences with her.
“Hell, hell, hell, hell, hell,” she said, and found it very liberating both to say the word and to defy him. Her society prized meekness in women, but she had made the discovery she was not eager to be anyone’s prize!
He shot her a stern look. She smiled back. He wasn’t her father! He didn’t look more than a few years older than she was. He couldn’t tell her how to behave!
He sighed, resigned, she hoped, to the fact he was not going to control her. She’d been controlled quite enough. This was her week to do whatever she wanted, including say hell to her heart’s content.
“What’s the most exciting thing that ever happened to you?” she pressed, when he actually shut his eyes, lifted his chin a bit higher to the sun, took a bite of biscuit, apparently intent on pretending he was dining alone and ignoring her questions.
He thought about it for a minute, but his reluctance to engage in this conversation was palpable. Finally he said, without even opening his eyes, “I ran into a grizzly bear while in Canada on a mountain survival exercise.”
“Really?” she breathed. “What happened?” It was better than she could have hoped. Better than a movie! She waited for him to tell her what she could picture so vividly—Ronan wrestling the primitive animal to the ground with his bare hands…
“It ran one way and I ran the other.”
She frowned, sharply disappointed at his lack of heroics. “That doesn’t sound very exciting!”
“I guess you had to be there.”
“I think I would like to go to the mountains in Canada.” Yes, even with bears, or maybe because of bears, it sounded like an adventure she’d enjoy very much. “Are the mountains beautiful? Is there snow?”
“Yes, to both.”
“What’s snow like?” she asked wistfully.
“Cold.”
“No, what does it feel like.” Again, he was trying to disengage, but he was the only person she’d ever met who had experienced snow, and she had to know.
“It’s different all the time,” he said, giving in a little, as if he sensed her needing to know. “If it’s very cold the snow is light and powdery, like frozen dust. If it’s warmer it’s heavy and wet and sticks together. You can build things with it when it’s like that.”
“Like a snowman?”
“Yeah, I suppose. I built a snow cave out of it.”
“Which kind is better for sledding?”
“The cold, dry kind. What do you know about that?”
“Nothing. I’ve seen it on television. I’ve always had a secret desire to try it, a secret desire to see different things than here, more beautiful.”
“I don’t know if there’s anything more beautiful than this,” he said. “It’s a different kind of beauty. More rugged. The landscape there is powerful rather than gentle. It reminds a person of how small they are and how big nature is.” He suddenly seemed to think he was talking too much. “I’m sure your husband will take you there if you want to go,” he said abruptly.
It was her turn to glare at him. She didn’t want to be reminded, at this moment, that her life was soon going to involve a husband.
“I’m fairly certain Prince Mahail,” she said, “is about as interested in tobogganing in snow as he is in training a water buffalo to tap dance.”
“He doesn’t like traveling? Trying new things?” He did open his eyes then, lower his chin. He was regarding her now with way too much interest.
She felt a sensation in her stomach like panic. “I don’t know what he likes,” she said, her voice strangled. She felt suddenly like crying, looked down at her plate and blinked back the tears.
Her life had come within seconds of being linked forever to a man who was a stranger to her. And despite the fact the heavens had taken pity on her and granted her a reprieve, there was no guarantee that linking would not still happen.
“Hey,” Ronan said, “hey, don’t cry.”
After all the events of yesterday, including being shot at, this was the first time she’d heard even the smallest hint of panic in that calm voice!
“I’m not crying,” she said. But she was. She scrubbed furiously at the tear that worked its way down her cheek. She didn’t want Ronan to be looking at her like that because he felt sorry for her!
She reminded herself she was supposed to be finding out about Ronan, not the other way around!
“What made you want to be a soldier?” she asked, trying desperately for an even tone of voice, to change the subject, to not waste one precious second contemplating all the adventures she was not going to have once she was married to Mahail.
Something flickered in his eyes. Sympathy? Compassion? Whatever it was, he opened up to her just the tiniest little bit.
“I had a lousy home life as a kid. I wanted routine. Stability. Rules. I found what I was looking for.” He regarded her intently, hesitated and then said softly, “And you will, too. Trust me.”
He would be such an easy man to trust, to believe that he had answers.
“Isn’t it a hard life you’ve chosen?” she asked him, even though what she really wanted to say was how? How will I ever find what I’m looking for? I don’t even know where to look!
He shrugged, tilted his chin back toward the sun. “Our unit’s unofficial motto is Go Hard or Go Home. Some would see it as hard. I see it as challenging.”
Was there any subtle way to ask what she most wanted to ask, besides How will I ever find what I’m looking for? It was inappropriate to ask him, and too soon. But still, she was not going to find herself alone on a deserted island with an extremely handsome man ever again.
She had to know. She had to know if he was available. Even though she herself, of course, was not. Not even close.
“Do you have a girlfriend?” She hoped she wasn’t blushing.
He opened his eyes, shot her a look, closed them again. “No.”
“Why not?”
His openness came to an abrupt end. That firm line appeared again around his mouth. “What is this? Twenty questions at the high school cafeteria?”
“What’s a high school caff-a-ter-ee-a?”
“Never mind. I don’t have a girlfriend because my lifestyle doesn’t lend itself to having a girlfriend.”
“Why?”
He sighed, but she was not going to be discouraged. Her option was to spend the week talking to him or talking to herself. At the moment she felt her survival depended on focusing on his life, rather than her own.
Maybe her desperation was apparent because he caved slightly. “I travel a lot. I can be called away from home for months at a time. I dismantle the odd bomb. I jump from airplanes.”
“Meeting the grizzly bear wasn’t the most exciting thing that ever happened to you!” she accused.
“Well, it was the most exciting thing that I’m allowed to talk about. Most of what I do is highly classified.”
“And dangerous.”
He shrugged. “Dangerous enough that it doesn’t seem fair to have a girlfriend or a family.”
“I’m not sure,” she said, thoughtfully, “what is unfair about being yourself?”
He looked at her curiously and she explained what she meant. “The best thing is to be passionate about life. That’s what makes people really seem alive, whole, isn’t it? If they aren’t afraid to live the way they want to live and to live fully? That’s what a girlfriend should want for you. For a life that makes you whole. And happy. Even if it is dangerous.”
She was a little embarrassed that she, who had never had a boyfriend, felt so certain about what qualifications his girlfriend should have. And she was sadly aware that passion, the ability to be alive and whole, were the very qualities she herself had lost somewhere a long the way.
As if to underscore how much she had lost or never discovered, he asked her, suddenly deciding to have a conversation after all, “So, what’s the most exciting thing you’ve ever done?”
Been shot at. Cut my hair. Ridden a motorcycle.
All the most exciting events of her life had happened yesterday! It seemed way too pathetic to admit that, though it increased her sense of urgency, this was her week to live.
“I’m afraid that’s classified,” she said, and was rewarded when he smiled, ever so slightly, but spoiled the effect entirely by chucking her under her chin as if she was a precocious child, gathered their plates and stood up.
Shoshauna realized, that panicky sensation suddenly back, that she had to squeeze as much into the next week as she possibly could. “I’m putting on my bathing suit now and going swimming. Are you coming?”
He looked pained. “No. I’ll look after the dishes.”
“We can do the dishes later. Together. You can show me how.”
He said another nice word under his breath.
She repeated it, and when he gave her that look, the stern, forbidding, don’t-mess-with-me look, she said it again!
When he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, a man marshaling his every resource, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was dreading this week every bit as much as she was looking forward to it.
“How about if we do the dishes now?” he said. “In this climate I don’t think you want to leave things out to attract bugs. And then,” he added, resigned, “if you really want, I’ll show you how to make biscuits.”
She eyed him suspiciously. He didn’t look like a man who would be the least bothered by a few bugs. He’d probably eaten them on occasion! And he certainly did not look like a man who wanted to give out cooking lessons.
So that left her with one conclusion. He didn’t like the water. No, that wasn’t it. And then, for some reason, she remembered the look on his face when he’d put that pink bikini back on the rack in the store yesterday.
And she understood perfectly!
Ronan did not want to see her in a bikini. Which meant, as much as he didn’t want to, he found her attractive.
A shiver went up and down her spine, and she felt something she had not felt for a very long time, if she had ever felt it at all.
Without knowing it, Ronan had given her a very special gift. Princess Shoshauna felt the exquisite discovery of her own power.
“I’d love to learn to make biscuits instead of going swimming,” she said meekly, the perfect B’Ranasha princess. Then she smiled to herself at the relief he was unable to mask in his features. She had a secret weapon. And she would decide when and where to use it.
“Hey,” Ronan snapped, “cut it out.”
The princess ignored him, took another handful of soap bubbles and blew them at him. Princess Shoshauna had developed a gift for knowing when it was okay to ignore his instructions and when it wasn’t, and it troubled him that she read him so easily after four days of being together.
He had not managed to keep her out of the bathing suit, hard as he had tried. He’d taken her at her word that she wanted to learn things and had her collecting fruit and firewood. He’d taught her how to start a decent fire, showed her edible plants, a few rudimentary survival skills.
Ronan had really thought she would lose interest in all these things, but she had not. Her fingers were covered in tiny pinpricks from her attempts to handle a needle and thread, she was sporting a bruise on one of her legs from trying to climb up a coconut tree, she gathered firewood every morning with enthusiasm and without being asked. Even her bed making was improving!
He was reluctantly aware that the princess had that quality that soldiers admired more than any other. They called it “try.” It was a never-say-die, never-quit determination that was worth more in many situations than other attributes like strength and smarts, though in fact the princess had both of those, too, her strength surprising, given her physical size.
Still, busy as he’d tried to keep her, he’d failed to keep her from swimming, though he’d developed his own survival technique for when she donned the lime-green handkerchief she called a bathing suit.
The bathing suit was absolutely astonishing on her. He knew as soon as he saw it that he had been wrong thinking the pink one he’d made her put back would look better, because nothing could look better.
She was pure, one-hundred-percent-female menace in that bathing suit, slenderness and curves in a head-spinning mix. Mercifully, for him, she was shy about wearing it, and got herself to the water’s edge each day before dropping the towel she wrapped herself in.
His survival technique: he went way down the beach and spearfished for dinner while she swam. He kept an eye on her, listened for sounds of distress, kept his distance.
He was quite pleased with his plan, because she was so gorgeous in a bathing suit it could steal a man’s strength as surely as Delilah had stolen Sampson’s by cutting off his hair.
Shoshauna blew some more bubbles at him.
“Cut it out,” he warned her again.
She chuckled, unfortunately, not the least intimidated by him anymore.
It was also unfortunately charming how much fun she was having doing the dishes. She had fun doing everything, going after life as if she had been a prisoner in a cell, marveling at the smallest things.
Hard as it was to maintain complete professionalism in the face of her joie de vivre, he was glad her mood was upbeat. There had been no more emotional outbursts after that single time she had burst into tears at the very mention of her fiancé, her husband-to-be.
Ronan could handle a lot of things, up to and including a mad mamma grizzly clicking her teeth at him and rearing to her full seven-foot height on her hind legs. But he could not handle a woman in tears!
Still he found himself contemplating that one time, in quiet moments, in the evenings when he was by himself and she had tumbled into bed, exhausted and happy. How could Shoshauna not even know if her future life partner liked traveling, or if he shared her desire to touch snow, to toboggan? The princess was, obviously, marrying a stranger. And just as obviously, and very understandably, she was terrified of it.
But all that fell clearly into the none-of-his-business category. The sense that swept over him, when he saw her shinny up a tree, grinning down at him like the cheeky little monkey she was, of being protective, almost furiously so, of wanting to rescue her from her life was inappropriate. He was a soldier. She was a princess. His life involved doing things he didn’t want to do, and so did hers.
But marrying someone she didn’t even really know? Glancing at her now, bubbles from head to toe, it seemed like a terrible shame. She was adorable—fun, curious, bratty, sexy as all get-out—she was the kind of girl some guy could fall head over heels in love with. And she deserved to know what that felt like.
Not, he told himself sternly, that he was in any kind of position to decide what she did or didn’t deserve. That wasn’t part of the mission.
He’d never had a mission that made him feel curiously weak instead of strong, as if things were spinning out of his control. He’d come to like being with her, so much so that even doing dishes with her was weakness, pure and simple.
It had been bad enough when she waltzed out in shorts every morning, her legs golden and flawless, looking like they went all the way to her belly button. Which showed today, her T-shirt a touch too small. Every time she moved her arms, he saw a flash of slender tummy.
It was bad enough that when he’d glanced over at her, hacking away at the poor defenseless mango or pricking her fingers with a needle, he felt an absurd desire to touch her hair because it had looked spiky, sticking up all over the place like tufts of grass but he was willing to bet it was soft as duck down.
It was bad enough that she was determined to have a friendship, and that even though he knew it was taboo, sympathy had made him actually engage with her instead of discouraging her.
I had a lousy home life as a kid. That was the most personal information he’d said to anyone about himself in years. He hated that he’d said it, even if he’d said it to try and make her realize good things could come from bad.
He hated that sharing with her that one stupid, small sentence had made him realize a loneliness resided in him that he had managed to outrun for a long, long time. He’d said he didn’t have a girlfriend because of his work, but that was only a part truth. The truth was he didn’t want anyone to know him so well that they could coax information out of him that made him feel vulnerable and not very strong at all.
He was a man who loved danger, who rose to the thrill of a risk. He lived by his unit’s motto, Go Hard or Go Home, and he did it with enthusiasm. His life was about intensely masculine things: strength, discipline, guts, toughness.
After his mother’s great love of all things frilly and froufrou, he had not just accepted his rough barracks existence, he had embraced it. He had, consciously or not, rejected the feminine, the demands of being around the female of the species. He had no desire to be kind, polite, gentle or accommodating.
But in revealing that one small vulnerability to Shoshauna, he recognized he had never taken the greatest risk of all.
Part of the reason he was a soldier—or maybe most of the reason—was he could keep his heart in armor. He’d been building that armor, piece by meticulous piece, since the death of his dad. But when he’d asked her, that first day together, “Who knows what love is?” he’d had a flash of memory, a realization that a place in him thought it knew exactly what love was.
There was a part of him that he most wanted to deny, that he had been very successfully denying until a few short days ago, but now it nibbled around the edges of his mind. Ronan secretly hoped there was a place a man could lay his armor down, a place he could be soft, a place where there was room to love another.
Shoshauna, without half trying, was bringing his secrets to the surface. She was way too curious and way too engaging. Luckily for him, he had developed that gift of men who did dangerous and shadowy work. He was taciturn, wary of any interest in him.
In his experience, civilians thought they wanted to know, thought a life of danger was like adventure movies, but it wasn’t and they didn’t.
But Shoshauna’s desire to know seemed genuine, and even though she had led the most sheltered of lives, he had a feeling she could handle who he really was. More than handle it—embrace it.
But these were the most dangerous thoughts—the thoughts that jeopardized his mission, his sense of professionalism and his sense of himself.
But what had his choices been? To totally ignore her for the week? Set up a tent out back here? Pretend she didn’t exist?
He was no expert on women, but he knew they liked to talk. It was in his own best interests to keep the princess moderately happy with their stay here. Hell, part of him, an unfortunately large part, wanted to make her happy before he returned her to a fate that he would not have wished on anyone.
Marriage seemed like a hard enough proposition without marrying someone you didn’t know. Ask his mother. She’d made it her hobby to marry people she didn’t really know.
A renegade thought blasted through his mind: if he was Shoshauna’s prince, he’d take her to that mountaintop just because she wanted to go, just to see the delight in her face when she looked down over those sweeping valleys, to see her inhale the crispness of the air. He’d build snowmen with her and race toboggans down breathtakingly steep slopes just to hear the sound of her laughter.
If he was her prince? Cripes, he was getting in bigger trouble by the minute.
There had been mistakes made over the past few days. One of them had been asking her about the most exciting thing in her life. Because it had been so pathetically evident it had probably been that motorcycle ride and all of this.
From the few words she’d said about passion he’d known instantly that she regretted the directions of her own life, yearned for more. And he’d been taken by her wisdom, too, when he’d told her that the dangerous parts of his job kept him from a relationship.
Was there really a woman out there who understood that caring about someone meant encouraging her partner to pursue what made him whole and alive? Not in his experience there wasn’t! Beginning with his mother, it was always about how she felt, what she needed to feel safe, secure, loved. Not that it had ever worked for her, that strangling kind of love that wanted to control and own.
The last thing he wanted to be thinking about was his mother! Even the bathing suit would be better than that. He was aware the thought of his mother had appeared because he had opened the door a crack when he admitted he had a lousy childhood. That was the whole problem with admissions like that.
He was here, on this island, with the princess, to do a simple job. To protect her. And that meant he did not—thank God—have the luxury of looking at himself right now.
Still, he knew he had to be very, very careful because he was treading a fine line. He’d already felt the uncomfortable wriggle of emotion for her. He didn’t want to be rude, but he had to make it very clear, to himself and to her, this was his job. He wasn’t on vacation, he wasn’t supposed to be having fun.
He couldn’t even allow himself to think the thoughts of a normal, healthy man when he saw her in that bathing suit every day.
But now he was wondering if he’d overrated that danger and underrated this one. Because in the bathing suit she was sexy. Untouchable and sexy, like a runway model or a film actress. He could watch her from a safe distance, up the beach somewhere, sunglasses covering his eyes so she would never read his expression.
With soap bubbles all over her from washing dishes, she was still sexy. But cute, too. He was not quite sure how she had managed to get soap bubbles all over the long length of her naked legs, but she had.
She put bubbles on her face, a bubble beard and moustache. “Look!”
“How old are you?” he asked, putting duty first, pretending pure irritation when in fact her enjoyment of very small things was increasingly enchanting.
“Twenty-one.”
“Well, quit acting like you’re six,” he said.
Then he felt bad, because she looked so crestfallen. Boundaries, yes, but he was not going to do that again: try to erect them by hurting her feelings. He’d crossed the fine line between being rude and erecting professional barriers. Ronan simply expected himself to be a better man than that.
Against his better judgment, but by way of apology, he scooped up a handful of suds and tossed them at her. She tossed some back. A few minutes later they were both drenched in suds and laughing.
Great. The barriers were down almost completely, when he had vowed to get them back up—when he knew her survival depended on it. And perhaps his own, too.
Still, despite the fact he knew he was dancing with the kind of danger that put meeting a grizzly bear to shame, it occurred to him, probably because of the seriousness of most of his work, he’d forgotten how to be young.
He was only twenty-seven, but he’d done work that had aged him beyond that, stolen his laughter. The kind of dark, gallows humor he shared with his comrades didn’t count.
Even when the guys played together, they played rough, body-bruising sports, the harder hitting the better. He had come to respect strength and guts, and his world was now almost exclusively about those things. There was no room in it for softness, not physical, certainly not emotional.
His work often required him to be mature way beyond his years, required him to shoulder responsibility that would have crippled any but the strongest of men. Life was so often serious, decisions so often involved life and death, that he had forgotten how to be playful, had forgotten how good it could feel to laugh like this.
The rewards of his kind of work were many: he felt a deep sense of honor; he felt as if he made a real difference in a troubled world; he was proud of his commitment to be of service to his fellow man; the bonds he had with his brothers in arms were stronger than steel. Ronan had never questioned the price he paid to do the work before, and he absolutely knew now was not the time to start!
Sharing a deserted island with a gorgeous princess who was eager to try on her new bikini, was absolutely the wrong time to decide to rediscover those things!
But just being around her made him so aware of softness, filled him with a treacherous yearning. The full meltdown could probably start with something as simple as wanting to touch her hair.
“Okay,” he said, serious, trying to be very serious, something light still lingering in his heart, “you want to learn how to make my secret biscuit recipe?”
Ronan had done many different survival schools. All the members of Excalibur prided themselves in their ability to produce really good food from limited ingredients, to use what they could find around them. He was actually more comfortable cooking over a fire than he was using an oven.
An hour later with flour now deeply stuck on her damp skin, she pulled her biscuit attempt from the wood-fired oven.
Ronan tried to keep a straight face. Every biscuit was a different size. Some were burned and some were raw.
“Try one,” she insisted.
Since he’d already hurt her feelings once today and decided that wasn’t the way to keep his professional distance, he sucked it up and took one of the better-looking biscuits.
He took a big bite. “Hey,” he lied, “not bad for a first try.”
She helped herself to one, wrinkled her nose, set it down. “I’ll try again tomorrow.”
He hoped she wouldn’t. He hoped she’d tire soon of the novelty of working together, because it was fun, way more fun than he wanted to have with her.
“Let’s go swimming now,” she said. “Could you come with me today? I thought I saw a shark yesterday.”
Was that pure devilment dancing in the turquoise of those eyes? Of course it was. She’d figured out he didn’t want to swim with her, figured out her softness was piercing his armor in ways no bullet ever had. She’d figured out how badly he didn’t want to be anywhere near her when she was in that bathing suit.
In other words, she had figured out his weakness.
He could not let her see that. One thing he’d learned as a soldier was you never ran away from the thing that scared you the most. Never. You ran straight toward it.
“Sure,” he said, with a careless shrug. “Let’s go.”
He said it with the bravado of a man who had just been assigned to dismantle a bomb and didn’t want a single soul to know how scared he was.
But when he looked into her eyes, dancing with absolute mischief, he was pretty sure he had not pulled it off.
She was not going to be fooled by him, and it was a little disconcerting to feel she could see through him so completely when he had become such an expert at hiding every weakness he ever felt.
CHAPTER FIVE
SHOSHAUNA stared at herself in the mirror in her bedroom and gulped. The bathing suit was really quite revealing. It hadn’t seemed to matter so much when Ronan was way down the shoreline, spearfishing, picking up driftwood, but today he was going to swim with her! Finally.
She could almost hear her mother reacting to her attire. “Common.” Her father would be none to pleased with this outfit, either, especially since she was in the company of a man, completely unchaperoned.
But wasn’t that the whole problem with her life? She had been far to anxious to please others and not nearly anxious enough to please herself. She had always dreamed of being bold, of being the adventurer, but in the end she had always backed away.
She remembered the exhilarating sense of power she had felt when she realized Ronan didn’t want to see this bathing suit, when she’d realized, despite all his determination not to, he found her attractive. Suddenly she wanted to feel that power again. She was so aware of the clock ticking. They had been here four days. There was three left, and then it would be over.
Suddenly nothing could have kept her from the sea, and Ronan.
At the last minute, though, as always, she wrapped a huge bath towel around herself before she stepped out of the house.
Ronan waited outside the door, glanced at her, his expression deadpan, but she was sure she saw a glint of amusement in his eyes, as if he knew she was really too shy to wear that bikini with confidence, with delight in her own power when there was a man in such close quarters.
“Look what I found under the porch,” he said.
Two sets of snorkels and fins! No one could look sexy or feel powerful in a snorkel and fins! Still, she had not snorkeled since the last time she had been here, and she remembered the experience with wonder.
“Was the surfboard there?”
“Yeah, an old longboard. You want me to grab it? You could paddle around on it.”
“No, thank you,” she said. Paddle around on it, as if she was a little kid at the wading pool. She wanted to surf on it—to capture the power of the sea—or nothing at all. Just to prove to him she was not a little kid, at all, she yanked the towel away.
He dropped his sunglasses down over his eyes rapidly, took a sudden interest in the two sets of snorkels and fins, but she could see his Adam’s apple jerk each time he swallowed.
She marched down the sand to the surf, trying to pretend she was confident as could be but entirely aware she was nearly naked and in way over her head without even touching the water. She plunged into the sea as quickly as she could.
Once covered by the blanket of the ocean, she turned back, pretending complete confidence.
“The water is wonderful,” she called. “Come in.” It was true, the water was wonderful, warm, a delight she had been discovering all week was even better against almost-naked skin.
Suddenly she was glad she’d found the courage to wear the bikini, glad she’d left the towel behind, glad she was experiencing how sensuous it was to be in the water with hardly anything between it and her, not even fabric. Her new haircut was perfect for swimming, too! Not heavy with wetness, it dried almost instantly in the sun.
She looked again at the beach. Ronan was watching her, arms folded over his chest, like a lifeguard at the kiddy park.
She was going to get that kiddy-park look off his face if it killed her!
“Come in,” she called again, and then pressed the button she somehow knew, by instinct, he could not stand to have pressed. “Unless you’re scared.”
Not of the water, either, but of her. She felt a little swell of that feeling, power, delicious, seductive, pure feminine power. She had been holding off with it, waiting, uncertain, but now the time felt right.
She watched as Ronan dropped the snorkeling gear in the sand, pulled his shirt over his head. She felt her mouth go dry. This was how she had hoped he would react to her. A nameless yearning engulfed her as she stared at the utter magnificence of his build.
He was pure and utter male perfection. Every fluid inch of him was about masculine strength, a body honed to the perfection of a hard fighting tool.
Shoshauna had thought she would feel like the powerful one if they swam together, but now she could see the power was in the chemistry itself, not in her, not in him.
There was a universal force that called when a certain woman looked at a certain man, when a certain man looked at a certain woman. It pulled them together, an ancient law of attraction, metal to magnet, a law irresistible, as integral as gravity to the earth.
Shoshauna became aware that the “power” she had so wanted to experiment with, to play with, was out of her control. She felt a kind of helpless thrill, like a child who had played with matches and was now having to deal with a renegade spark that had flared to flame.
Impossible to put this particular fire out. Ronan was all sleek muscle and hard lines, not an ounce of superfluous fat or flesh on his powerful male body. His chest was deep, his stomach flat, ridged with ab muscles, his shoulders impossibly broad. His legs were long, rippling with muscle.
He dove cleanly into the water, cutting it with his body. Two powerful strokes carried him to her, another beyond her. She watched, mesmerized, as his strong crawl carried him effortlessly out into the bay. He stopped twenty or thirty yards from her, trod water, shook diamond droplets of the sea from his hair.
Watching him, she realized what she had been doing could not even really be called swimming. She was paddling. No wonder he treated her as if she belonged in the kiddy pool! Bathing suit aside, in the water she was an elephant trying to keep pace with a cheetah!
Ronan flipped over on his back, spread his arms like a star and floated. It looked so comfortable, so relaxing that she tried it and nearly drowned. She came up sputtering for air.
“Are you okay?”
And what if she wasn’t? Would he swim over here, gather her in his arms, maybe give her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?
“I’m fine,” she squeaked.
He did swim back over, but did not come too close. “You’re about as deep as you should go,” he told her. “I’ve noticed over the past few days you are not a very strong swimmer.”
“In my mother’s mind swimming in the ocean was an activity for the sons and daughters of fishermen.”
“It seems a shame to live in a place like this, surrounded by water and not know how to swim. It seems foolish to me, unnecessarily risky, because with this much water you’re eventually going to have an encounter with it.” Hastily he added, “Not that I’m calling your mother foolish.”
“Plus, she has this thing about showing skin.” And that was with a regular bathing suit.
Ronan eyed her. “I take it she wouldn’t approve of the bathing suit.”
He had noticed.
“She’d have a heart attack,” Shoshauna admitted.
“It’s having just about the same effect on me,” he said with a rueful grin, taking all her power away by admitting he’d noticed, a man incapable of pretense, real, just as she’d known he was.
“That’s why your mom doesn’t want you wearing stuff like that. Men are evil creatures, given to drawing conclusions from visual clues that aren’t necessarily correct.”
Back to the kiddy pool! He was going to turn this into a lecture. But he didn’t. He left it at that, yet she felt a little chastened anyway.
As if he sensed that, he quickly changed the subject. “So, I’ve got you out here in the water. Want to—”
Was she actually hoping he was going to propose something a little evil?
“Want to learn how to swim a little better?”
She nodded, both relieved and annoyed by his ability to treat her like a kid, his charge, nothing more.
“You won’t be ready to enter the Olympics after one lesson, but if you fall out of a boat, you’ll be able to survive.”
It had probably been foolish to suggest teaching Shoshauna to swim. But the fact of the matter was she lived on an island. She was around water all the time. It seemed an unbelievable oversight to him that her education had not included swimming lessons.
On the other hand, what did he know about what skills a princess needed? Still, he felt he could leave here a better man knowing that if she did fall off a boat, she could tread water until she was rescued.
Probably he was kidding himself that he was teaching her something important. If a princess fell overboard, surely ten underlings jumped in the water after her.
But somehow it was increasingly important to him that she know how to save herself. And maybe not just if she fell off a boat. All these things he had been teaching her this week were skills that made no sense for a princess.
But for a woman coming into herself, learning the power of self-reliance seemed vital. It felt important that if he gave her nothing else, he gave her a taste of that: what her potential was, what she was capable of doing and learning if she set her mind to it.
Because Ronan was Australian and had grown up around beaches and heavy surf, he had quite often been chosen to instruct other members of Excalibur in survival swimming.
Thankfully, he could teach just about anybody to swim without ever laying a hand on them.
She was a surprisingly eager student, more willing to try things in the water than many a seasoned soldier. Like the things she had been doing on land, he soon realized she had no fear, and she learned very quickly. By the end of a half hour, she could tread water for a few minutes, had the beginnings of a not bad front crawl and could do exactly two strokes of a backstroke before she sank and came up sputtering.
And then disaster struck, the kind, from teaching soldiers, he was totally unprepared for.
She was treading water, when her mouth formed a startled little O. She forgot to sweep the water, wrapped her arms around herself and promptly sank.
His mind screamed shark even though he had evaluated the risks of swimming in the bay and decided they were minimal.
When she didn’t bob right back to the surface, he was at her in a second, dove, wrapped his arm around her waist, dragged her up. No sign of a shark, though her arms were still tightly wrapped around her chest.
Details. Part of him was trying to register what was wrong, when she sputtered something incomprehensible and her face turned bright, bright red.
“My top,” she sputtered.
For a second he didn’t comprehend what she was saying, and when he did he was pretty sure the heart attack he’d teased her about earlier was going to happen for real. He had his arms around a nearly naked princess.
He let go of her so fast she started to sink again, unwilling to unwrap her arms from around her naked bosom.
Somehow her flimsy top had gone missing!
“Swim in to where you can stand up,” he ordered her sharply.
He knew exactly what tone to use on a frightened soldier to ensure instant obedience, and it worked on her. She headed for shore, doing a clumsy one-armed crawl—her other arm still firmly clamped over her chest—that he might have found funny if it was anyone but her. As soon as he made sure she was standing up on the ocean bottom, he looked around.
The missing article was floating several yards away. He swam over and grabbed it, knew it was the wrong time to think how delicate it felt, how fragile in his big, rough hands, what a flimsy piece of material to be given so much responsibility.
He came up behind her. She was standing up to her shoulder blades in water and still had a tight wrap on herself, but there was no hiding the naked line of her back, the absolute feminine perfection of her.
“I’ll look away,” he said, trying to make her feel as if it was no big deal. “You put it back on.”
Within minutes she had the bathing suit back on, but she wouldn’t look at him. And he was finding it very difficult to look at her.
Wordlessly she left the water, spread out her towel and lay down on her stomach. She still wouldn’t even look at him and he figured maybe that was a good thing. He put on the snorkeling gear and headed back out into the bay.
He began to see school after school of butterfly fish, many that he recognized as the same as he would see in the reefs off Australia: the distinctive yellow, white and black stripes of the threadfin, the black splash of color that identified the teardrop.
Suddenly, Ronan didn’t want her to stay embarrassed all day, just so that he could be protected from his own vulnerability around her. He didn’t want her to miss the enchantment of the reef fish.
Her embarrassment over the incident was a good reminder to him that she had grown up very sheltered. She had sensed the bikini would get his attention, but she hadn’t known what to do with it when she succeeded.
In his world, girls were fast and flirty and knew exactly what to do with male attention. Her innocence in a bold world made him want to share the snorkeling experience with her even more.
They would focus on the fish, the snorkeling, not each other.
“Shoshauna! Put on a snorkel and fins. You have to see this.”
He realized he’d called her by her first name, as if they were friends, as if it was okay for them to snorkel together, to share these moments.
Too late to back out, though. She joined him in the water, but not before tugging on her bathing suit strings about a hundred times to make sure they were secure.
And then she was beside him, and the magic happened. They swam into a world of such beauty it was almost incomprehensible. Fish in psychedelic colors that ranged from brilliant orange to electric blue swam around them. They saw every variety of damselfish, puffer fish, triggerfish, surgeonfish.
He tapped her shoulder. “Watch those ones,” he said, pointing at an orange band. “It’s a type of surgeonfish, they’re called that because their spines are scalpel sharp.”
Her wonder was palpable when a Moorish idol investigated her with at least as much interest as she was giving it! A school of the normally shy neon-green and blue palenose parrot fishes swam around her as if she was part of the sea.
He was not sure when he lost interest in the fish and focused instead on her reaction to them. Ronan was not sure he had seen anything as lovely as the awed expression on her face when a bluestripe snapper kissed her hand.
He was breaking all the rules. And somehow it seemed worth it. And somehow he didn’t care. Time evaporated, and he was stunned when he saw the sun going down in the sky.
They went in to shore, dried the saltwater off with towels. He saw she was looking at him with a look that was both innocent and hungry.
“I’m going to cook dinner,” he said gruffly. Suddenly breaking the rules didn’t seem as great, it didn’t seem worth it, and he did care.
He cared because he felt something, and he knew it was huge. He felt the desire to know someone. He wanted to know her better. He wanted things he had never wanted and that, in this case, he knew he could never have.
These four days together had created an illusion that they were just two normal people caught up together. These days had allowed him to see her as real, as few people had ever seen her. These days had allowed him to see her, and he had liked what he had seen. It was natural to want to know more, to explore where this affinity he felt for her could go.
But the island was a fantasy, one so strong it had diluted reality, made him forget reality.
He was a soldier. She was a princess. Their worlds were a zillion miles apart. She was promised to someone else.
With those facts foremost in his mind, he cooked dinner, refusing her offer to help, and he was brusque with her when she asked him if he knew the name of a bright-yellow snout-nosed fish they had seen. She took the hint and they ate in blessed silence. Why did he miss being peppered with her questions? Did she, too, realize that a dangerous shift had happened between them?
Still, getting ready for bed, he was congratulating himself on what a fine job he’d done on reerecting the barriers, when he heard an unmistakable whimper from her room.
Surely she wasn’t that embarrassed over her brief nude scene?
He knew he had to ignore her, but then she cried out again, the sound muffled, as if she had a blanket stuffed in her mouth. It was the sound being stifled that made him bolt from his room, and barge through her door.
She was alone, in bed. No enemy had crept up on him while he’d been busy playing reef guide instead of doing his job.
“What’s the matter?” He squinted at her through the darkness.
The sheet was pulled up around her, right to her chin.
“I hurt so bad.”
“What do you mean?”
He lit the hurricane lamp that had been left on a chair just inside her door, moved to the side of her bed and gazed down at her. She reluctantly pulled the sheet down just enough to show him her shoulders. That’s why she had been quiet at dinner.
Not embarrassed, not taking the hint that he didn’t want to talk to her, but in pain. Even in the light of the lantern he could clearly see she was badly sunburned. Cursing himself silently, he wondered how close she had come to heat exhaustion.
White lines where her bikini straps had been were in sharp contrast to her skin.
Because her skin tones were so golden it had never occurred to him she might burn. It had not seemed scorchingly hot out today. On the other hand he should have known breezes coming off the water could make it seem cooler than it was. It had never occurred to him that someone who lived in this island paradise might not avail themselves of the outdoors.
He remembered, too late, what she had said about her mother. “Has your skin ever seen the sun before?” he asked her.
She shook her head, contrite. “Not for a long time. I was allowed to come here until I was about thirteen, but then my mother thought I was getting to be too much of a tomboy. She thought skin darkened by the sun was—”
“Let me guess,” he said dryly. “Common.”
He was rewarded with a weak smile from her. Selfish bastard that he was he thought, At least I’m not going to have to see her in a bikini again for the three days we have left here on the island.
But there was another test he had to pass right now. He was going to have to administer first aid to her burns. She’d exposed her back to the sun while they snorkeled. The water beading on it had drawn the sun like a magnet. Though her shoulders were very red looking, most of that burn was going to be on her back where she couldn’t reach it herself.
Having grown up in Australia, he was cautious of the sun, but his skin was also more acclimatized to sun than that of most of the people he worked with. He did not have fair coloring, his skin seemed to like the sun.
But many times after long training days in the sun, especially desert training, soldiers were hurting. Ronan had learned lots of ways to ease the sting with readily available ingredients: either vinegar or baking soda added to bath water could bring relief. Unfortunately, just as when he was in the field, they didn’t have a bath here.
What they did have was aspirin, he had seen that in a cabinet in the outdoor kitchen, and powdered milk, an ingredient he’d used before to field dress a sunburn.
He knew, though, there was going to be a big difference between placing soothing dressings cooled with freshly made milk onto her back, and slapping it onto a fellow soldier’s.
All day he’d struggled to at least keep the physical barriers between them up, since the emotional ones seemed to be falling faster than he could reerect them. When she’d lost the top, and he’d wrapped his arms around her to pull her back to the water’s surface, he’d known he had to avoid going to that place again at all costs, skin against skin.
But here he was at that place again. It almost felt as if the universe was conspiring against him.
But she was his charge. He had no choice. He felt guilty that she’d gotten burned on his watch in the first place. It was proof, really, he could not be trusted with softer things, more tender things, things that required a gentle touch.
It was proof, too, that he was preoccupied, missing the details that he had always been so good at catching.
“Come on out to the kitchen,” he said gruffly. “I’ll put something on that that will make it feel better.”
“I can’t get dressed,” she told him, and blushed. “My skin feels like its shrinking. I don’t think I can move my arms. I don’t want to put anything on that touches my skin.”
Oh well, just run out there naked then.
He yanked the sheet out from the bottom of the bed and tucked it around her right up to her chin. “Come on.”
She wobbled out behind him to the kitchen, the sheet draped clumsily over her, him uncomfortably and acutely aware that underneath it she was probably as naked as the day she was born. The outfit was somehow as dangerous—maybe more so—than the bikini had been.
And the night was dangerous—the stars like jewels in the night sky, the flowers releasing their perfume with a gentle and seductive vengeance.
“Sit,” he said, swinging a chair out for her. He took a deep breath, prayed for strength and then did what had to be done. He lifted the sheet away from her back, forced himself to be clinical.
Her back looked so tender with burn that he forgot how awkward this situation was. The marks where her bikini strings had been tied up dissected it, at her neck and midback, white lines in stark contrast to the rest of her. Her skin was glowing bright red on top of her copper tones.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news,” he said, his sympathy genuine, his guilt acute even though he knew how hard it was to spot a burn as it was happening in the full sunlight, “but in the next few days your skin is going to be peeling. It may even blister.”
“Really?” she asked.
She couldn’t possibly sound, well, pleased, rather than distressed.
He had to make it a bit clearer. “Um, you could probably be lizard lady at the sideshow for a week or two.”
“Really?” she said, again.
No doubt about it. Definitely pleased.
“Is there some reason that would make you happy?” he asked.
“Between my new hair and lizard lady, Prince Mahail will probably call off the wedding. Indefinitely.”
Now there was no mistaking the pleasure in her voice.
Don’t ask, Ronan. “Is he really that superficial?”
“He chose me for my hair!”
Well, he’d asked. Now he had to deal with the rush of indignation he felt. A man chose a wife for her hair?
It was primitive and tyrannical. It was not what she deserved. Wasn’t he in the business of protecting democracy? Of protecting people’s freedoms and right to choose? If she was being forced into this, then what? Cause an international incident by imposing his values on B’Ranasha, by rescuing the princess from her fate?
“Are you being forced to marry him?” he asked.
“Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?”
“Nobody forced me to say yes, but there was enormous pressure, the weight of everybody’s expectations.”
He turned from her quickly to stave off the impulse to shake her. Here he’d been thinking he had to rescue her when the aggravating truth was she had not, as far as he could see, made a single move to rescue herself. She seemed to just be blindly trusting something was going to happen to get her out of her marriage. And much as he hated to admit it, so far that had worked not too badly for her.
But her luck was going to run out, and for a take-charge kind of guy, relying on luck to determine fate was about the worst possible policy.
Rather than share that with her, or allow her to see the fury he felt with her, Ronan busied himself mixing a solution of powdered milk and water in a big bowl. He tore several clean tea towels into rags and submerged them in the mixture.
Then, his unwanted surge of emotion under control, a gladiator who had no choice but the ring, he turned back to her, lifted the sheet off her back.
“Hold that up for me.”
He laid the first of the milk-soaked rags flat on her naked back, smoothed it on with his hands. She seemed unbelievably delicate. Her skin was hot beneath the dressing. And, for now anyway, before the inevitable peeling, it felt incredibly smooth, flawless beneath his fingertips. He didn’t know of any other way to bring her comfort, but touching her like this was intimate enough to make him feel faintly crazy, a purely primitive longing welling up within him.
He thought she might flinch, but instead she gave a little moan of pleasure and relief as the first cool, milk-soaked dressing adhered to her back, a sound that could have easily been made in another context.
“Oh,” she breathed. “That feels so good. I don’t think I’ve ever felt anything that good.”
His wicked male mind wondered just how innocent that made her. Plenty innocent. And it was his job to keep it that way.
He thought about a man he had never seen, whom he knew nothing about, becoming her husband, being trusted with her delicacy, and he felt another unwanted stab of strong emotion.
Not jealousy, he told himself, God forbid, not jealousy, just an extension of his job. Protectiveness.
But he knew it wasn’t exactly a part of his job to wonder, was that man whom she had almost married, worthy of her? Would her prince be able to make her pleasure as important as his own when the time came? Would he be tender and considerate? Would he stoke the fire that burned in her eyes, or would he put it out?
Ronan, he reprimanded himself. Stop it! By her own admission, she was not being forced into anything. It was her problem not his.
Still, the feeling of craziness intensified, he felt a sudden primitive need to show her what it should feel like, all heat and passion, tenderness and exquisite pleasure. If she’d ever experienced what was real between a man and a woman she wouldn’t accept a substitute, no matter how much pressure she thought she felt.
She was seriously going to pay with her life to relieve a little temporary pressure from her folks?
He gave himself a fierce mental shake. His thinking was ludicrous, totally unacceptable, completely corrupted by emotion. He had known her less than a full week, which really meant he did not know her at all!
He was not dating her, he was protecting her. Imagining his lips on her lips was not a part of the mission.
Who would have thought he would end up having to protect the princess from himself?
“Leave those dressings on there for twenty minutes,” he said, his voice absolutely flat, not revealing one little bit of his inner struggle, the madness that was threatening to envelope him. “Unfortunately in this heat the residue of the milk will start to sour if you leave it on overnight. You’re going to have to rinse off in the shower before you go back to bed.” He passed her some aspirin and a glass of water.
“This will take the sting out.” He sounded as if he was reading from a first-aid manual. “Drink all the water, too, just in case you’re a bit dehydrated. I think you’ll sleep like a baby after all this.”
She probably would, too, but he was wondering if he was ever going to sleep again!
Fixing her up had taken way too long, even with him trying to balance a gentle touch with his urgency to get this new form of torture over with.
“I’ll head back to bed, I’ll leave this lamp for you. You can peel those dressings off by yourself in twenty minutes or so. Don’t forget to shower.”
“All right.”
“You should be okay for a few hours. If the pain comes back, starts bugging you, wake me up. We’ll do it all again.” He had to suck it up to even make that offer. He didn’t want to touch her back again, have her naked under a sheet, the two of them alone in a place just a little too much like paradise.
No wonder Adam and Eve had gone for the apple!
“Ronan?” Her voice was husky. She touched his arm.
He froze, aware he was holding his breath, scared of what could happen next, if she asked him to stay with her. Scared of the physical attraction, scared of the thoughts he had had earlier.
“What?” He growled.
“Thank you so much.”
What was he expecting? She was burned to a crisp. The last thing on her mind was, well, the thing that was on his mind. Which was her lips, soft and pliable, and how they would feel underneath his, how they would taste.
“Just doing my job.”
She glanced over her shoulder at him. Her eyes met his. There was no mistaking the heat and the hunger that changed their color from turquoise to a shade of indigo. He realized it wasn’t the last thing on her mind after all. That one small push from the universe and they’d be all over each other, burn or no burn. The awareness that sizzled in the air between them put that burn on her back to shame.
He sucked in a deep breath, then ducked his head, turned abruptly and walked quickly away from her.
It took more discipline to do that than to do two hundred push-ups at the whim of a aggravated sergeant, to make a bed perfectly for the thousandth time, to jump out of an airplane from twenty thousand feet in the dead of the night. Way more.
He glanced at his watch to check the date. He had to get control over this situation before it deteriorated any more.
But when he thought of her shaking droplets of water from the jagged tips of her hair, laughing, the tenderness of her back underneath the largeness of his hands, he felt a dip in the bottom of his belly.
He focused on it, but it wasn’t that familiar warning, his sideways feeling. It was a warmth as familiar as the sun and as necessary to life.
What had happened to his warning system? Had it become dismantled? Ronan wondered if he had lost some part of himself that he needed in the turquoise depths of her eyes.
Isn’t that what he’d learned about love from his mother? That relationships equaled the surrender of power?
“You are not having a relationship with her,” he told himself sternly, but the words were hollow, and he knew he had already crossed lines he didn’t want to cross.
But tomorrow was a new day, a new battle. He was a warrior and he fully intended to recapture his lost power.
CHAPTER SIX
SHOSHAUNA took a deep breath, slid a look at Ronan. He was intense this morning, highly focused, but not on her. She could not look at him—at the dark, neat hair, his face freshly shaven, the soft gold brown of his eyes, the sheer male beauty of the way he carried himself—without feeling a shiver, remembering his hands on her back last night.
“Are you mad at me?”
“Princess?” he asked, his voice flat, as if he had no idea what she was talking about.
“Yesterday you called me Shoshauna,” she said.
He said nothing; he did not look at her. He had barely spoken to her all morning. She’d gotten up and managed to get dressed, a painful process given the sunburn. Still, she had been more aware of something hammering in her heart, a desire to see him again, to be with him, than of the pain of that burn.
But Ronan had been nowhere to be found when she had come out of her bedroom. He’d left a breakfast of fresh biscuits and cut fruit for her, not outside on the bench where she had grown accustomed to sharing casual meals with him, but at the dining room table, at a place perfectly set for one.
Shoshauna had rebelled against the formality of it and taken a plate outside. As she ate she could hear the thunk of an ax biting into wood in the distance. Just as she was finishing the last of the biscuits, he dragged a tree into their kitchen clearing.
Watching him work, hauling that tree, straining against it, that awareness tingled through her, the same as she had felt yesterday when she had watched him strip off his shirt before swimming. She felt as if she was vibrating from it. Ronan was so one hundred percent man, all easy strength and formidable will.
Even to her inexperienced eye it looked as if he was bringing in enough wood to keep the stove fired up for about five years.
“Good morning, Ronan.” Good grief, she could hear the awareness in her voice, a husky breathlessness.
She knew how much she had come to live for his smile when he withheld it. Instead, he’d barely said good morning, biting it out as if it hurt him to be polite. Then he was focusing on the wood he’d brought in. After using a handsaw to reduce the tree to blocks, he set a chunk on a stump chopping block, swung the ax over his head, and down into the wood.
The whole exercise of reducing the tree to firewood was a demonstration—entirely unconscious on his part—of pure masculine strength, and she could feel her heart skip a beat every time he lifted the ax with easy, thoughtless grace. She remembered again the strength in those hands, tempered last night, and shivered.
But today his strength was not tempered at all. He certainly seemed angry, the wood splintering into a thousand pieces with each mighty whack of the ax blade, tension bunching his muscles, his face smooth with a total lack of expression.
He had not even asked her how her sunburn felt, and it felt terrible. Could she be bold enough to ask him to dress it again? She felt as if she was still trembling inside from the way his hands had felt pressing those soothing cloths onto her back last night. But he looked angry this morning, remote, not the same man who had been so tender last night.
“Ronan?” she pressed, even though it was obvious he didn’t want to talk. “Are you angry about something?”
Actually, something in him seemed to have shifted last night when he had questioned her about her marriage. He had gone very quiet after she had admitted she wasn’t being forced to marry anyone.
“No, ma’am, I’m not angry. What’s to be angry about?”
“Stop it!”
He set down the ax, wiped the sweat off his forehead with a quick lift of his shirt collar, then folded his arms over his chest, looked askance at her.
“I didn’t mean chopping the wood,” she said, knowing he had misunderstood her deliberately.
“What did you mean then, Princess?”
“Why are you being so formal? You weren’t like this yesterday.”
“Yesterday,” he said tightly, “was a mistake. I forgot myself, and it’s not going to happen again.”
“Having fun, going snorkeling was forgetting yourself?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“If you call me ma’am one more time, I’m going to throw this coconut right at your large, overweight head!”
“I think you might mean my big, fat head.”
“That’s exactly what I meant!”
He actually looked as though he might smile, but if he was amused he doused it quickly.
“Princess,” he said, his patience elaborate and annoying, “I’m at work. I’m on the clock. I’m not here to have fun. I’m not here to teach you to swim or to identify yellow tangs for you. My job is to protect you, to keep you safe until I can get you back to your home.”
“I could have been assassinated while you were out there chopping down the jungle,” she said, aware her tone was growing snippy with impatience. How could he possibly not want more of what they’d had yesterday?
Not just the physical touch, though that had filled her with a hunger that felt ravenous, a tiger that needed to be fed, but the laughter, the easy camaraderie between them. It was that she found herself craving even more. How could it be that he did not want the same things?
“I think,” he said dryly, “if assassins had arrived on the island, I would have heard a boat. Or a helicopter. I was only a few seconds away.”
He was deliberately missing the point! “Bitten by a snake, then!”
He didn’t answer, and she hated that he was treating her like a precocious child, though for some reason his attitude was making her act like one.
“Eaten by a tiger,” she muttered. “Attacked by a monkey.”
He sent her one irritated look, went back to the wood.
“I’m making a point! There is no danger here. None. No assassins, no snakes, no tigers, no mad monkeys. It would be perfectly fine for you to relax your vigilance.”
Crash. The wood splintered. He gathered the splinters, tossed them in a pile, wouldn’t look at her. “I relaxed yesterday. You got a large, overweight sunburn because of it.”
“You are not feeling responsible for that, are you?” His lack of a response was all the answer she needed. “Ronan, it wasn’t your fault. It’s not as if it was life threatening, anyway. A little sunburn. I can hardly feel it today.” Which was a lie, but if it got rid of that look from his face—a look of cool professional detachment—it would be a lie worth telling.
He said nothing, and she knew this was about more than a sunburn.
“Are you mad because I agreed to get married?”
Bull’s-eye. Something hard and cold in his face shook her. “That falls squarely in the none-of-my-business category.”
“That’s not true. We’re friends. I want to talk to you about it.” And suddenly she did. She felt that if she talked to Ronan, all the chaos and uncertainty inside her would subside. She felt that the terrible loneliness that had eaten at her ever since she said yes to Prince Mahail would finally go away.
She felt as if she would know what to do.
“My cat died,” she blurted out. “That’s why I agreed to marry him.”
It felt good to say it out loud, though she could tell by the look on his face he now thought she was certifiably insane.
“But you have to understand about the cat,” she said in a rush.
“No,” he said, holding up his hand, a clear stop signal. “No, I don’t have to understand about the cat. I don’t want you telling me about your personal life. Nothing. No cat. No marriage. Not what is on or off your mother’s approval list, though we both know that what isn’t on it is cavorting in the ocean in a bathing suit top that is unstable with a man you barely know.”
“I do know you,” she protested.
“No you don’t. We can’t be friends,” he said quietly. “Do you get that?”
She had thought they were past that, that they were already well on their way to being friends, and possibly even something more than friends. These last few days she had shared more with him than she could remember sharing with anyone. She had felt herself opening around him, like a flower opening to sunshine.
He made her discover things about herself that she hadn’t known. Being around him made her feel strong and competent. And alive. It was easy to be herself with him. How could he say they could not be friends?
“No,” she said stubbornly. “I don’t get it.”
“Actually,” he said tersely, “it doesn’t really matter if you get it or not, just as long as I get it.”
She felt desperate. It was as if he was on a raft and she was on shore, and the distance between them was growing. She needed to bring him back, any way she could. “Okay, I won’t tell you anything about me. Nothing.”
He looked skeptical, so she rushed on, desperate. “I’ll put a piece of tape over my mouth. But I can’t go out in the sun today. I was hoping you’d teach me how to play chess. My mother felt chess was a very masculine game, that girls should not play it.”
Even though he’d specifically told her not to mention her mother to him, she took a chance and believed she had been right to do so, because something flickered in his eyes.
He knew she’d be a good chess player if she got the chance, but if he’d realized that, he doused the thought as quickly as his smile of moments ago. He was silent, refusing the bait.
“Do you know how to play chess?” If she could just get him to sit down with her, spend time with her, soon it would be easy again and fun. She wanted to know so much about him. She wanted him to know so much about her. They only had a few days left! He couldn’t spoil it. He just couldn’t.
He took up the ax and put another piece of wood on the stump he was using as a chopping block. He hit it with such furious strength she winced.
“Are you going to ignore me?”
“I’m sure as hell going to try.”
Shoshauna was a princess. She was not used to being ignored. She was used to people doing what she wanted them to do.
But this felt different. It felt as if she would die if he ignored her, if they could not get back to that place they had been at yesterday, swimming in the magical world of a turquoise sea and rainbow-hued fish, his hands on her back strong, cool, filled with confidence, the hands of a man who knew how to touch a woman in ways that could steal her breath, her heart, her soul.
Her sense of desperation grew. He was holding the key to something locked inside of her. How could he refuse to open that secret door? The place where she would, finally, know who she was.
“If I told my father you had done something inappropriate,” she said coolly, “you’d spend the rest of your life in jail.”
He gave her a look so fearless and so loaded with scorn it made her feel about six inches high. And that was when she knew he was immovable in his resolve. She knew it did not matter what she did—she could threaten him, try to manipulate him with sweetness—he was not going to do as she wanted. He had drawn his line in the sand.
And over such a ridiculously simple thing. She only wanted him to play chess with her!
Only, it wasn’t really that simple, and he knew it, even if she was trying to deny it. Getting to know each other better would have complications and repercussions that could resound through both their lives.
But why worry about that today? They had so little time left. Couldn’t they just go on as they had been? Couldn’t they just pretend they were ordinary people in extraordinary circumstances?
But even as she thought it, she knew he would never like pretending. He was too real for that. And when she slid another look his way, she could tell by the determined set of his jaw that he intended to worry about that today, and she could tell something else by the set of his jaw.
She was completely powerless over him.
“I’m sorry I said that,” she said, feeling utterly defeated, “about my father putting you in prison. It was a stupid thing to say, very childish.”
He shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.” As if he expected her to say things like that, to act spoiled and rotten if she didn’t get her own way. She had not done one thing—not one—to lead him to believe such things of her.
Unless you included saying yes to marrying a man she did not love.
That would speak volumes about her character to a man like Ronan, who wore his honor and his integrity as part of the armor around him.
“I would never do something so horrible as tell lies about you. I’m not a liar.” But hadn’t she lied to herself all along, about Mahail, her marriage, her life?
“I said it didn’t matter,” he said sharply.
“Now you really are mad at me.”
He sighed heavily.
Shoshauna, looking at herself with the brutal assessment she saw in his eyes, burst into tears, ran into the house, slammed her bedroom door and cried until she had no tears left.
Shoot, Ronan thought, was she ever going to stop crying? Bastard. How hard would it have been to teach her to play chess?
It wasn’t about teaching her how to play chess, he told himself sternly. It was about the fact that things were already complicated so much that she was in there crying over something as tiny as the fact he’d refused to teach her to play chess.
Though, dammit, when she had said her mother didn’t want her to play chess, that it was masculine, something in him had just itched to give her the rudiments of the game. She had such a good mind. He bet she’d be a better-than-average player once she got the fundamentals down, probably a downright formidable one.
She didn’t come out of that room for the rest of the day. When he told her he had lunch ready, she answered through the closed door, her voice muffled, that she wasn’t hungry.
Now it was the same answer for supper. He should have been relieved. This was exactly what he needed to keep his vows. Distance. Space. Instead he felt worried about her, guilty about the pain he’d caused.
“Come on,” he said, from the other side of the door, “you have to eat.”
“Why? To make you feel like you’ve fulfilled your obligation to look after me? Is providing a nutritious menu part of protecting me? Go away!”
He opened the door a crack. She was sitting on her bed cross-legged in those shorty-shorts that showed way too much of her gorgeous copper-toned legs. She looked up when he came in, looked swiftly back down. Her eyes were puffy from crying. Her short, boyish hair was every which way. She’d taken her bra straps off her burned shoulders, and they hung out the arms of her T-shirt.
“I told you to go away.”
“You should eat something.” He stepped inside the door a bit.
“You know what? I’m not a little kid. You don’t have to tell me to eat.”
He was already way too aware she was not a little kid. He’d seen the damned bikini once too often! He’d seen what was under the bikini, too.
He was also aware this was becoming a failure of major proportions. He was going to take her back safe from threat but damaged nonetheless: hair chopped off, sunburned, starving, puffy-eyed from crying. Though they still had two days and a couple of hours to get through before he could cross back over that water with her, deliver her to Gray. She couldn’t possibly cry that long.
His stomach knotted at the thought. Could she? He studied her to see if she was all done crying.
She’d found a magazine somewhere, and she was avoiding his eyes. The magazine looked as if it had been printed in about 1957, but she was studying it as intently as if she could read her future on the pages. Her eyes sparkled suspiciously. More tears gathering?
“Look,” he said uncomfortably, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, “I’m not trying to be mean to you. I’m just telling you the way things have to be.”
“Is that right?” she snapped, and threw down the magazine. She regarded him with spitting eyes, and he could see clearly it was fury in them, not tears. “As it happens, I’m sick and tired of people telling me how it’s going to be. Why are you the one who decides how it’s going to be? Because you’re a man?”
She had him there.
“Because I’m the one with the job to do,” he said, but he heard the wavering of his own conviction. If ever a woman was born to be his equal it was this one.
She hopped off the bed. Instinct told him to get away from her. A stronger instinct told him to stay.
She stopped in front of him, regarded him with challenge. He, foolishly, held his ground.
She reached up on tiptoe, and she took his lips with her own.
He was enveloped in pure and sweet sensation. Her kiss was as refreshing and clean as rainwater. Her lips told him abut the polarities within her: innocence and passion, enthusiasm and hesitancy, desire and doubt.
He had heard there were drugs so strong a man could be made helpless by them after one taste.
He had never believed it until this moment. He willed himself not to respond, but he did not have enough will to move away from her, from the sweetness of her quest.
The hesitancy and the doubt suddenly dissolved. Her arms reached out, tangled themselves around his neck, drew him closer to her. Her scent wrapped around him, feminine, clean, intoxicating. Through the thinness of her shirt he could feel the warmth radiating off her skin. Her curves, soft, sensual, womanly, pressed into him.
Temptation was furious within him. Pure feeling tried to swamp rational thought. But the soldier in him, highly disciplined, did the clean divide between the emotion he was feeling and what he needed to do.
If he continued this, if he accepted the invitation of her lips, the growing urgency of her kiss, if he allowed it to go where it wanted to go, it would be like a wild horse that had broken free, allowed to run. There would be no bringing it back under rein once it had gone too far.
The soldier wanted control; the man wanted to lose control.
The soldier insisted on inserting one more fact. If this carried to its natural conclusion, Princess Shoshauna would be compromised. The wedding would be off. Her wedding. Again, she wouldn’t have made a choice, just allowed herself to be carried along by forces she considered out of her control.
It was not what Ronan wanted for her.
He didn’t want her to get married to anyone but—
But who?
Him? A soldier. A soldier who didn’t believe in marriage? Who hated it? This must be a genetic flaw in his family, the ability to convince oneself over a very short period of time, before reality had a chance to kick in, that a marriage could work. He yanked himself away from her.
This was the difference between him and his mother: he didn’t have to follow the fantasy all the way through to the end. He already knew the end of every love story.
The soldier won—fact over fiction, practical analysis over emotion, discipline over the wayward leanings of a man’s heart.
But he was aware it was a slim victory at best. And he was aware that aggravating word, love, had popped up again, banished from his vocabulary since around his thirteenth birthday. It was suddenly presenting itself in his life with annoying frequency.
Ronan made himself hold Shoshauna’s gaze, fiery with passion, soft with surrender. He tried to force all emotion from his tone. But the magnitude of his failure to do so—the cold fury of his voice—even took him by surprise. Of course, he really wasn’t angry at her, but at himself, at his own vulnerability, his own weakness, his sudden crippling wistfulness.
Hope—a sudden ridiculous wish to regain his own innocence, a desire to be able to believe in things he had long since lost faith in.
“Are you using me to buy your freedom?”
She reeled back from him. If he was not mistaken the tears were back in her eyes, all the proof he needed that insanity had grabbed him momentarily, that moment when he had contemplated her and himself and marriage in the same single thought.
The truth was much more simple. He was a soldier, rough around the edges, hardened, not suitable for the company of a princess or anyone sensitive or fragile.
But there was nothing the least bit fragile about Shoshauna when she planted both her little hands on his chest and shoved him with such amazing strength that it knocked him completely off balance. He stumbled backward, two steps, through her bedroom doorway, and she rushed forward and slammed the door behind him with the force of a hurricane.
As he contemplated the slammed door, he had the politically incorrect thought that it was a mistake that hurricanes weren’t still named exclusively after women: volatile, completely unpredictable, even the strongest man could not hope to hold his balance in the fury.
“Just go straight to hell!” she yelled at him through the door. She followed that with a curse that was common among working men and soldiers, a curse so common her mother surely would have had heart failure hearing it come from her princess daughter’s refined lips.
So he was returning Shoshauna a changed woman. No hair, sunburned, starved and she was going to be able to hold her own in a vocabulary contest with a construction crew.
He turned away, muttering to himself, “Well, that didn’t go particularly well.”
But outside, contemplating a star-studded night, black-velvet sky meeting inky-black ocean, he rethought his conclusions.
Maybe it had gone well. Shoshauna was a woman who needed to discover the depths of her own power, who needed to know how to utilize the hurricane forces within her, so she would not be so easily buffeted by the forces outside of her. In the past it seemed that every shift of wind had made her change direction.
She’d made the decision to get married because her cat died? Only his mother could come up with a fruitier reason than that!
But from the way Shoshauna had shoved him and slammed that door, she was nearly there. Could she hold on to what she was discovering about herself enough to refuse a marriage to a man she did not love? Could she understand she had within her the strength to choose the life she wanted for herself?
Despite the peaceful serenity of the night, contemplating such issues made his head hurt. One of the things he appreciated most about his military lifestyle was that it was a cut-and-dried world, regulated, no room for contemplation, few complexities. You did what you were trained to do, you followed orders: no question, no thought, no introspection.
He scrubbed his hand across his lips, but he had a feeling what had been left there was not going to be that easy to erase.
After a long time he looked at his watch. It was past midnight. Just under forty-eight hours to go, and then they were leaving this island, meeting Gray.
What if her life was still in danger?
Well, if it was, if the situation was still not resolved, Gray had to have come up with a protection plan for her that did not involve Ronan.
But was he going to trust anyone else with her protection if she was still in danger? Would he have a choice? If he was ordered back to Excalibur, he was going to have to go, whether she was in danger or not.
He hoped it was a choice he was never going to have to make. Which would he obey? The call of duty or the call of his own heart?
Jake Ronan had never had to ask himself a question like that before, and he didn’t like it one little bit that he had asked it now.
The fact that he had asked it meant something had shifted in him, changed. He cared about someone else as much as he cared about duty. Once you had done that, could you ever go back to the way you were before?
That’s what he felt over the next twenty-four hours. That he was a man trying desperately to be what he had been before: cool, calm, professional, a man notorious for being able to control emotion in situations gone wild.
He almost succeeded, too.
It wasn’t fun, and it wasn’t easy, that he was managing to keep the barriers up between them. She was using the kitchen at different times than him. She refused to eat what he left out for her. He found her burnt offerings all over the kitchen, along with mashed fruit. He didn’t know if she was trying to torment him by washing her underthings and stringing them on a line by the outdoor shower, but torment him it did, especially since she had managed to turn her bra from pure white to a funny shade of pink.
Of course, he could show her how to do laundry. He wanted to, but to what end? Nothing about her life included needing an ability to do laundry without turning her whites to pink.
And nothing about his life needed the complication of inviting her back into it.
No, this might be painful: these silences, the nose tilted upward every time she had to pass him, the hurt she was trying to hide with pride and seething silence, but in the end it was for the best. Even when he found an aloe vera plant and knew how it would soothe her sunburn, bring moisture and coolness and healing to her now badly peeling skin, he would not allow himself to make the offer.
When he saw her sitting at the dining room table by herself, moving chess pieces wistfully, he would not allow himself to give in to the sudden weakness of wanting to teach her how to play.
It only led to other wantings: wanting to make her laugh, wanting to see her succeed, wanting to see her tongue stuck between her teeth in concentration, wanting to touch her hair.
Wanting desperately to taste her lips again, just one more time, as if he could memorize how it felt and carry it inside him forever.
But he didn’t give in to any of that. He applied every bit of discipline he had ever learned as a soldier to do what was right instead of what he wanted to do.
And he would have made it.
He would have made it right until the end, except that the wind came up.
The surf was up in the bay. And Princess Shoshauna, clad in a T-shirt to cover her burns, was running toward it, laughing with exhilaration and anticipation, the old surfboard they’d uncovered tucked under her arm.
“Hey,” he yelled from the steps of the cottage, “you aren’t a good enough swimmer for that water.”
She glanced back. If he was not mistaken she stuck out her tongue at him. And then she ran even faster, kicking up the sand in her bare feet.
With a sigh of resignation and surrender, Ronan went after her.
CHAPTER SEVEN
SHOSHAUNA found the waves extraordinarily beautiful, rolling four feet high out in the water where they began their curl, breaking on the beach with a thunderous explosion of white foam and fury.
Her foot actually touched the hard pack of wave-pounded sand, when his hand clamped down on her shoulder with such strength it spun her.
Even though she had spent way too much time imagining his touch, it was not satisfactory in that context! She faced him, glaring. “What?” she demanded.
“You’re not a strong enough swimmer for that surf.”
“Well, you don’t know everything! You said the surf would never even come up in this bay and you were wrong about that!”
“I’m not wrong about this. I’m not letting you go in the water by yourself.”
He had that look on his face, fierce; the warrior not to be challenged.
But Shoshauna had been counting days and hours. She knew this time of freedom was nearly over for her. Tomorrow they would be gone from here. And she knew something else. She was responsible for her own life and her own decisions.
She stood her ground, lifted her chin to him.
“I have a lifelong dream of doing this, and I’m doing it.”
He looked totally unimpressed with her newfound resolve, indifferent to her discovery of her own power, immune to the sway of her life dreams. He folded his arms over his chest, set his legs, a man getting ready to throw her over his shoulder if he had to.
As delicious as it might be to be carried by him kicking and screaming up to the cottage, this was important to her, and she suddenly had to make him see that.
“It’s my lifelong dream, and the waves came. Don’t you think you have to regard that as a gift from the gods?”
“No.”
“Ronan, all my life people have made my decisions for me. And I’ve let them. Starting right here and right now, I’m not letting them anymore. Not even you.”
Something in him faltered. He looked at the waves and he looked at her. She could see the struggle in his face.
“Ronan, its not that I want to. I have to. I have to know what it feels like to ride that kind of power, to leash it. I feel if I can do that, conquer those waves, it’s just the beginning for me. If I can do that, I can do anything.”
And suddenly she knew she had never spoken truer words. Suddenly she realized she had made a crucial error the other night when she had thought he held the key to the secrets locked away within her.
When they had started this adventure, she remembered saying she didn’t know how to find what she was looking for because she didn’t know where to look.
But suddenly she knew exactly where to look.
Every answer she had ever needed was there. Right inside herself. And part of that was linked to these waves, to knowing what she was capable of, to tapping her sense of adventure instead of denying it. She could not ask Ronan—or anyone else—not her mother or her father or Mahail to accept responsibility for her life. She was in charge. She was taking responsibility for herself. He did not hold the key to her secrets; she did.
She knew that what she was thinking must have shown in her face, because Ronan studied her, then nodded once, and the look on his face was something she would take back with her and cherish as much, maybe more, than the satisfaction of riding the wave.
She had won Ronan’s admiration—reluctant, maybe, but still there. He had looked at her, long and hard, and he had been satisfied with what he had seen.
She turned and stepped into the surf, laughed as she leaped over a tumbling wave and it crashed around her, soaking her in foam and seawater.
Then, when she was up to her knees, she placed the board carefully in front of her and tossed herself, belly down, on top of it. It was as slippery as a banister she had once greased with butter, and it scooted out from underneath her as if it was a living thing. A wave pounded over her, awesome in its absolute power, and then she got up and ran after the board.
Drenched, but deliriously happy, she caught the board, shook water from herself, tried again. And then again. It was discouraging. She couldn’t even lie on it without getting dumped off. How was she ever going to surf?
Her arms and shoulders began to hurt, and it occurred to her this was going to be a lot harder than she’d been led to believe by watching surfers on TV. But in a way she was glad. She wanted it to be challenging. She wanted to test her spunk and her determination and her spirit of adventure. Life-altering moments were not meant to be easy!
Ronan came and picked her up out of the sand after she was dumped for about the hundredth time, grabbed the board that was being dragged out to sea. She grabbed it back from him.
He sighed. “Let me give you a few tips before you go back out there. The first is this: you don’t conquer that water. You work with it, you read it, you become a part of it. Give me the board.”
It was an act of trust to hand the board to him, because he could just take it and go back to the cottage, but somehow she knew he was now as committed to this as she was. There was nothing tricky about Ronan. He was refreshing in that he was such a what-you-see-is-what-you-get kind of guy.
“You’re lucky,” he said, “it’s a longboard, not a short one, a thruster. But it’s old, so it doesn’t have a leash on it, which means you have to be very aware where it is at all times. This board is the hardest thing in the water, and believe me, it hurts when it clobbers you.”
She nodded. He tossed the board down on the sand.
“Okay, get on it, belly down.”
She recognized the gift he was giving her: his experience, and recognized her chances of doing this were better if she listened to him. And that’s what he’d said. True power wasn’t about conquering, it was about working with the elements, reading them.
And that’s what Ronan was like: one of the elements, not to be conquered, not to be tamed. To be read and worked with.
When she was down on her belly, he gave her tips about positioning: how to hold her chin, where to have her weight on the board—dead center, not too far back or too far forward.
And so she learned another lesson about power: it was all about balance.
He told her how to spot a wave that was good to ride. “Nothing shaped like a C,” he warned her sternly. “Look for waves shaped liked pyramids, small rollers to start with. We’ll keep you here in the surf, no deeper than your hips until you get the hang of it.”
He said that with absolute confidence, not a doubt in his mind that she would get the hang of it, that she would be riding waves.
“So, practice hopping up a couple of times, here on the sand. Grab the rails.”
“It doesn’t have rails!”
“Put your hands on the edges,” he showed her, positioning her hands. She tried not to find his touch too distracting! “And then push up, bend your back and knees to start, get one leg under you, and pop up as fast as you can. If you do it slow, you’ll just tip over once you’re in the water.”
Under his critical eye, she did it about a dozen times. If he kept this up she was going to be too tired to do it for real!
“Okay,” he finally said, satisfied, peeling off his shirt and dropping it in the sand. “Let’s hit the water.”
They didn’t go out very far, the water swirling around his hips, a little higher on her, lapping beneath her breastbone.
“This is the best place to learn, right here.” He steadied the board for her while she managed to gracelessly flop on top of it.
“Don’t even try to stand up the first couple of times, just ride it, get a sense for how your surfboard sleds.”
“Sleds? As in snow?”
“Same word,” he said, and she smiled thinking this might be as close as she got to sledding of any kind. Maybe she would have to be satisfied to look after two dreams with one activity!
“Okay, here it comes. Paddle with those arms, not too fast, just to build momentum.”
Shoshauna felt the wave lift the board, paddled and then felt the most amazing thing: as if she was the masthead at the head of that wave. The board was moving with its own power now and it shot her forward with incredible and exhilarating speed. The ride lasted maybe a full two seconds, and then she was tossed onto the sand with such force it lifted her shirt and ground sand into her skin.
“Get up,” he yelled, “incoming.”
Too late, the next wave pounded down on top of her, ground a little more sand into her skin.
He was there in an instant hauling her to her feet.
She was laughing so hard she was choking. “My God, Ronan, is there anything more fun in the entire world than that?”
He looked at her, smiled. “Now, you’re stoked,” he said.
“Stoked?”
“Surfer word for ready, so excited about the waves you can barely stand it.”
“That’s me,” she agreed, “stoked.” And it was true. She felt as if she had waited her whole life to feel this: excited, alive, tingling with the awareness of possibility.
“Ready to try it standing up?”
“I’m sooo ready,” she said.
“You would have made a hell of a soldier,” he said with a rueful shake of his head, and she knew she had just been paid the highest of compliments.
“I want to do it myself!”
“Sweetheart, in surfing that’s the only way you can do it.”
Sweetheart. Was it the exhilaration of that offhanded endearment that filled her with a brand-new kind of power, a brand-new confidence?
She went back out, got on the board, carefully positioned herself, stomach down. She turned, watching over her shoulder for just the right wave.
She floated up and over a few rolling waves, and then she saw one coming, the third in a set of three. She scrambled, but despite her practice runs, the board was impossibly slippery beneath her feet. It popped out from under her. The wave swallowed her, curled around her, tossed her and the board effortlessly toward the shore.
She popped up, aware Ronan was right beside her, waiting, watching. But the truth was, despite a mouth full of seawater, she loved this! She loved feeling so part of the water, feeling so challenged. There was only excitement in her as she grabbed the board, swam back out and tried again. And again. And again.
Ronan watched, offered occasional advice, shouted encouragement, but he’d been right. There was only one way to do this. No one could do it for you. It was just like life. He did not even try to retrieve the board for her, did not try to help her back on it after it got away for about the hundredth time. Was he waiting for her to fail? For exhaustion and frustration to steal the determination from her heart?
But when she looked into the strong lines of his face, that was not what she saw. Not at all. She saw a man who believed she could do it and was willing to hold on to that belief, even while her own faith faded.
It was his confidence in her, the look on his face, that made her turn the board back to shore one last time, watch the waves gathering over her shoulder. It was the look on his face that made Shoshauna feel as if she would die before she quit.
Astonishingly, everything worked. The wave came, and the crest lifted her and the board. She found her feet; they stuck to the board; she crouched at exactly the right moment.
She was riding the sea, being thrust with incredible power toward the shore.
She rode its fabulous power for less than a full second, but she rode it long enough to feel its song beneath her, to feel her oneness with that power, to taste it, to know it, to want it. Her exhaustion disappeared, replaced by exhilaration.
She was really not sure which was more exhilarating, riding the wave or having earned the look of quiet respect in Ronan’s face as he came up to her, held up his hand. “Slap my hand,” he told her.
She did, and felt his power as surely as she had felt that of the wave.
“That’s a high five, surfer lingo for a great ride,” he told her.
She achieved two more satisfactory rides before exhaustion made her quit.
He escorted her to shore. She was shivering with exhaustion and exertion and he wrapped her in the shirt he had discarded there in the sand.
“I did it!” she whispered.
“Yes, you did.”
She thought of all the things she had done since they had landed on this island and felt a sigh of contentment within her. She was a different person than she had been a few short days ago, far more sure of herself, loving the glimpse she’d had of her own power, of what she was capable of doing once she had set her mind to it.
“I want to see what you can do,” she said. She meant surfing, but suddenly her eyes were on his lips, and his were on hers.
“Show me,” she asked him, her voice a plea. Show me where it all can go. Show me all that a person can be.
He hesitated, looked at her lips, then looked at the waves, the lesser of two temptations. She saw the longing in his eyes, knew he was stoked. She caught a glimpse of the boy he must have once been, before he had learned to ride his power, tame it, leash it.
And then he picked up the board and leaped over the crashing waves to the water beyond. He lay down on the board, paddled it out, his strength against the surging ocean nothing less than amazing. He scorned the surf that she had ridden, made his way strongly past the breakers, got up into a sitting position, straddling the board and then waited.
He rode up and over the swells, waiting, gauging the waves, patient. She saw the wave coming that she knew he would choose.
He dropped to his chest, paddled forward, a few hard strokes to get the board moving, glanced back just as the top of the wave picked up the back of his board. She saw the nose of the board lift out of the water, and then, just when she thought maybe he had missed it, in one quick snap, he was up.
He rode the board sideways, one hip toward the nose of the board, the other toward the tail, his feet apart, knees bent, arms out, his position slightly crouched. She could see him altering his position, shifting his weight with his body position to steer the board. He was actually cutting across the face of the wave, down under the curl, his grace easy, confident and breathtaking. He made it look astonishingly easy.
This was where it went, then. When a person exercised their power completely, it became a ballet, not a fight with the forces, but a beautiful, intricate dance with the elements. Ronan rode that wave with such certainty.
Shoshauna had walked all her life with men who called themselves princes, but this was the first time she had seen a man who truly owned the earth, who could be one with it, who was so comfortable with his own power and in his own skin.
There was another element to what he was doing, and she became aware of it as he outran the wave, dropped back to his stomach, moved out to catch another. He was not showing her up, not at all.
Showing off for her, showing her his agility and his strength and his grace in this complex dance with the sea.
He may have been mastering the sea, but he was giving in, surrendering, to the chemistry, the sizzle that had been between them from the very moment he had first touched her, dragged her to the ground out of harm’s way, a mere week ago, a lifetime ago.
Ronan was doing what men had been doing for woman since time began: he was preening for her, saying, without the complication of words: I am strong. I am fearless. I am skilled. I am the hunter, and I will hunt for you. I am the warrior, and I will protect you.
It was a mating ritual, and she could feel her heart rising to the song he was singing to her out there on the waves.
Finally he came in, tossed the board down, then threw himself down on his stomach and lay panting in the sand beside her.
She wanted to taste his lips again, but knew she was in the danger zone. He questioned her motives, he would never allow himself to be convinced that it was about them, not about her looking for convenient ways to escape her destiny.
To even try to convince him might be to jeopardize the small amount of time they had left.
Tomorrow, hours away from now, they would leave here.
As if thinking the same thought, he told her his plan for the day. They would take the boat back across the water, find where the motorcycle was stashed in the shrubbery. Did she know of a fish-and-chips-style pub close to the palace? She told him that almost certainly it was Gabby’s, the only British-style pub on the island that she was aware of.
“We’ll meet Colonel Peterson there at three,” he said.
“And then?”
“If it’s safe, you’ll go home. If it isn’t, you’ll most likely go into hiding for a little longer.”
“With you?”
“No, Shoshauna,” he said quietly. “Not with me.”
She would have tonight, then one more ride on that motorcycle, and then, whatever happened next, this would be over.
Sadness threatened to overwhelm her, and she realized she did not want to ruin one moment of this time she had left contemplating what was coming. She suspected there was going to be plenty of time for sadness.
Now was the time for joy. For connection. He knew they were saying goodbye, it had relaxed his guard.
Shoshauna looked at the broadness of Ronan’s shoulders as he lay in the sand beside her, how his back narrowed to the slenderness of his waist, she looked at how the wet shorts clung to the hard-muscled lines of his legs and his buttocks.
She became aware he was watching her watching him, out of the corner of his eye, letting it happen, maybe even enjoying it.
She reached out and rested her hand on the dip of his spine between his shoulders. For a minute his muscles stiffened under her touch, and she wondered if he would deprive her of this moment, get up, head to the cottage, put distance between them. She wondered if she had overplayed.
But then he relaxed, closed his eyes, let her touch him, and she thought, See? I knew I would be a good chess player. Still, she dared not do more than that, for fear he would move away, but she knew he was as aware as she was that their time together was very nearly over. That was the only reason he was allowing this. And so she tried to memorize the beauty of his salt- and sand-encrusted skin beneath her fingertips, the wondrous composition of his muscle and skin. She felt as if she could feel the life force flowing, vibrating, throbbing through him with its own energy, strong, pure, good.
Night began to fall, and with it the trade winds picked up and the wind chilled. She could feel the goose bumps rising on his flesh and on her own. The waves crashed on the shore, throwing fine spray droplets of water up toward them.
Still, neither of them made a move to leave this moment behind.
“Do you think we could have a bonfire tonight,” she asked, “right here on the beach?”
Silence. Struggle. It seemed as if he would never answer. She was aware she was holding her breath.
“Yeah,” he said, finally, gruffly. “I think we could.”
She breathed again.
Ronan slid a glance at Shoshauna. She had changed into a striped shirt and some crazy pair of canvas slacks she had found in the cottage, lace-up front with frayed bottoms that made her look like an adorable stowaway on a pirate’s ship.
Despite the outfit, she was changed since the surfing episode, carrying herself differently. A new confidence, a new certainty in herself. He was glad he’d let down his guard enough to be part of giving her that gift, the gift of realizing who she would be once she went back to her old world.
Surely, he thought looking at her, at the tilt of her chin, the strength in her eyes, the fluid way she moved, a woman certain of herself, she would carry that within her, she would never marry a man for convenience, or because it would please others. He remembered her hand resting on his back. Surely, in that small gesture, he had felt who she was, and who she would be.
Tonight, their last night together, he would keep his guard down, just a bit, just enough.
Enough to what? he asked himself.
To have parts of her to hold on to when he let her go, when he did not have her anymore, when he faced the fact he would probably never look at her face again.
Then he would have this night: the two of them, a bonfire, her laughter, the light flickering on her skin, the sparkle in her eyes putting the stars to shame.
In the gathering darkness they hauled firewood to the beach. As the stars came out, they roasted fish on sticks, remembered her antics in the water, laughed.
Tomorrow it would be over. For tonight he was not going to be a soldier. He was going to be a man.
And so they talked deep into the night. When it got colder, he went and got a blanket and wrapped it around her shoulders, and then when it got colder still and she held up a corner, he went and sat beneath the blanket with her, shoulder to shoulder, watching the stars, listening to the waves and her voice, stealing glimpses of her face, made even more gorgeous by the reflection of the flame that flickered across it.
At first the talk was light. He modified a few jokes and made her laugh. She told him about tormenting her nannies and schoolteachers.
But somehow as the night deepened, so did the talk. And he was hearing abut a childhood that had been privileged and pampered, but also very lonely.
She told him about the kitten she had found on a rare trip to the public market, and how she had stuck it under her dress and taken it home. She smiled as she told the story about a little kitten taking away the loneliness, how she had talked to it, slept with it, made it her best friend.
The cat had died.
“Silly, maybe to be so devastated over a cat,” she said sadly, “but I can’t tell you how I missed him, and how the rooms of my apartment seemed so empty once he was gone. I missed all his adorable poses, and his incredible self-centeredness.”
“What was his name?”
“Don’t laugh.”
“Okay.”
“It was Retnuh. In our language it means Beloved.”
He didn’t laugh. In fact, he didn’t find it funny at all. He found it sad and lonely and it confirmed things about her life that she had wanted to tell him all along but that he had already guessed anyway.
“Prince Mahail’s proposal came very shortly after my Beloved died. Ronan, it felt so much easier to get swept along in all the excitement than to feel what I was feeling. Bereft. Lonely. Pathetic. A woman whose deepest love had been for a cat.”
But he didn’t see it as pathetic. He saw it as something else: a woman with a fierce capacity to love, giving her whole heart when she decided to love, giving it her everything. Would the man who finally received that understand what a gift it was, what a treasure?
“Will you tell me something about you now?”
It was one of those trick questions women were so good at. She had shared something deep, meaningful. She wasn’t going to be satisfied if he talked about his favorite soccer team.
“I wouldn’t know where to begin,” he said, hedging.
“What kind of little boy were you?” she asked him.
Ah, a logical place to begin. “A very bad one,” he said.
“Bad or mischievous?”
“Bad. I was the kid putting the potatoes in the tailpipes of cars, breaking the neighbors’ windows, getting expelled from school for fighting.”
“But why?”
But why? The question no one had asked. “My Dad died when I was six. Not using that as an excuse, just some boys need a father’s hand in their lives. My mother seemed to know she was in way over her head with me. I think wanting to get me under control was probably motivation for most of her marriages.”
“Marriages? How many?” Shoshauna whispered, wide-eyed. This would be scandalous in her country where divorce was nearly unheard of. It had been scandalous enough in his own.
“Counting the one coming up? Seven?”
“You can’t be responsible for that one!”
Still, he always felt vaguely responsible, a futile sense of not being able to protect his mother. When he was younger it was a sense of not being enough.
“What was that like for you growing up? Were any of her husbands like a father to you?” Shoshauna asked.
And for some reason he told her what he had never told anyone. About the misery and the feelings of rejection and the rebellion against each new man. He told her about how that little tiny secret spark of hope that someday he would have a father again had been steadily eroded into cynicism.
He didn’t know why he told her, only that when he did, he didn’t feel weaker. He felt lighter.
And more content than he had felt in many years.
“What was your mother’s marriage to your father like?” she asked softly.
He was silent, remembering. Finally he sighed, and he could hear something that was wistful in him in that sigh. He had thought it was long dead, but now he found it was just sleeping.
“Like I said, I was only six when he died, so I don’t know if these memories are true, or if they are as I wish it had been.”
“Tell me what you think you remember.”
“Happiness.” He was surprised by how choked he sounded. “Laughter. I remember, one memory more vivid than any other, of my dad chasing my mom around the house, her running from him shrieking with laughter, her face alight with life and joy. And when he caught her, I remember him holding her, covering her with kisses, me trying to squeeze in between them, to be a part of it. And then he lifted me up, and they squeezed me between them so hard I almost couldn’t breathe for the joy of it.”
For a long time she was silent, and when she looked at him, he saw what the day had given her in her face: a new maturity, a new ability to be herself in the world.
And he heard it in her voice, in the wisdom of what she said.
She said, “Once your mother had that, what she had with your father, I would think she could not even imagine trying to live without it. By marrying all those men, she was only trying to be alive again. Probably for you, as much as for herself. It wasn’t that she wanted those men to give you something you didn’t have, it was that she wanted to give you what she had been before, she saw you grieving for her as much as for him.”
It was strange, but when he heard those words, he felt as if he had searched for them, been on a quest that led him exactly to this place.
A place where, finally, he could forgive his mother.
Ever since he’d left home, it was as if he had tried desperately to put a lid on the longing his earliest memories had created. He had tried to fill all the spaces within himself: with discipline, with relentless strength, with purpose, with the adrenaline rush of doing dangerous things.
But now he saw that, just like Shoshauna, he had been brought to this place to find what was really within himself.
He was a man who wanted to be loved.
And deserved to be loved.
A man who had come to know you could fill your whole world, but if it was missing the secret ingredient it was empty.
With the fire warm against their faces and the blanket wrapped around them, they slept under the winking stars and to the music of the crashing waves. He had not felt so peaceful, or so whole, for a long, long time.
But he awoke with a fighting man’s instinct just before dawn.
For a moment he was disoriented, her hair, soft as eiderdown, softer than he could have ever imagined it, tickling the bottom of his chin, her head resting on his chest, her breath blowing in warm puffs against his skin.
The feeling lasted less than half a second.
He could hear the steady, but still far off, wop-wop-wop of a helicopter engine, beneath that the steady but still-distant whine of powerboats.
He sat up, saw the boats coming, halfway between the island and the mainland, three of them forming a vee in the water, the helicopter zooming ahead of them to do reconnaissance.
The fire, he thought, amazed at his own stupidity. He’d been able to see the lights of the mainland from here, how could he have taken a chance by lighting that fire?
Because he’d been blinded, that’s how. He’d forgotten the number-one rule of protection, no not forgotten it, been lulled into believing, that just this once it would be okay to set it aside. But he’d been wrong. He’d broken the rule he knew to be sacred in his business, and now he was about to pay the price.
He knew that emotional involvement with the principal jeopardized their well-being, their safety. And he had done it anyway, putting his needs ahead of what he knew was right.
He’d acted as if they were on a damn holiday from the moment they’d landed on this island. Instead of snorkeling and surfing, he should have spent his time creating a defensible position: hiding places, booby traps, a fallback plan.
He felt the sting of his greatest failure, but there was no time now for self-castigation. There would probably be plenty of time for that later.
He eyed their own boat, the tide out, so far up on the sand he didn’t have a chance of getting it to the water before the other boats were on them, and he didn’t like the idea of being out in the open, sitting ducks. He could hear the engines of those other boats, anyway. They were far more powerful than the boat on the beach.
“Wake up,” he shouted at her, leaping to his feet, his hand rough on her slender shoulder.
There was no time to appreciate her sleep-ruffed hair, her eyes fluttering open, the way a line from his own chest was imprinted on her cheek. She was blinking at him with sleepy trust that he knew himself to be completely unworthy of.
He yanked her to her feet. She caught his urgency instantly, allowed herself to be pushed at high speed toward the cottage. He stopped there only briefly to pick up the Glock, two clips of ammo, and then he led the way through the jungle, to where he had chopped down the tree earlier.
He tucked her under the waxy leaves of a gigantic elephant foot shrub. “Don’t you move until I tell you you can,” he said.
“You’re not leaving me here!”
He instantly saw that her concern was not for herself but for him. This was the price for letting his barriers down, for not maintaining his distance and his authority. She thought listening to him was an option. She did not want to understand it was his job to put himself between her and danger.
She did not want to accept reality.
And his weakness was that for a few hours yesterday he had not accepted it either.
“Princess, do not make me say this again,” he said sharply. “You do not move until you hear from me, personally, that it’s okay to do so.”
Three boats and a helicopter. He had to assume the worst in terms of who it was and what their intent was. That was his job, to react to worst-case scenarios. There was a good chance she might not be hearing from him, personally, ever again. He might be able to outthink those kind of numbers, but their only chance was if she cooperated, stayed out of the way.
“My life depends on your obedience,” he told her, and saw, finally, her capitulation.
He raced back to the tree line, watched the boats coming closer and closer, cutting through the waters of the bay. His mind did the clean divide, began clicking through options of how to keep her safe with very limited resources. Not enough rounds to hold off the army that was approaching.
The boats drew closer, and suddenly he stood down. His adrenaline stopped pumping. He recognized Colonel Gray Peterson at the helm of the first boat, and he stepped from the trees.
Ronan moved slowly, feeling his sense of failure acutely. This was ending well, but not because of his competence. Because of luck. Because of that thing she had always seemed to trust and he had scorned.
Gray came across the sand toward him.
“Where’s the princess?” he asked.
“Secure.”
Of course she picked that moment to break from the trees and scamper down the beach. She must have left her hiding place within seconds of Ronan securing her promise she would stay there.
“Grandpa!” She threw herself into the arms of a distinguished-looking elderly man.
Ronan contemplated her disobedience—the complete disintegration of his authority over her—with self-disgust.
Gray looked at her, his eyebrows arched upward. “Good grief, man, tell me that’s not the princess.”
“I’m afraid it is.”
But Gray’s dismay was not because she had broken cover without being given the go-ahead.
“What on earth happened to her hair?”
The truth was Ronan could only vaguely remember what she had looked like before.
“She’s safe. Who cares about her hair?”
Gray’s look said it all. People cared about her hair. Ronan was glad she had cut it if it made her less of a commodity.
“She is safe, isn’t she?” Ronan asked. “That’s why you’re here? That’s why you didn’t wait for me to come in?”
“We made an arrest three days ago.”
“Who?” He needed to know that. If it was some organized group with terror cells all over the place, she would never be safe. And what would he do then?
Peterson lowered his voice. “You gave us the lead. Princess Shoshauna’s cousin, Mirassa. She was an old flame of Prince Mahail’s. You’ve heard that expression ‘Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,’ but in this case it was more like high school high jinx gone very wrong.”
Ronan watched Shoshauna, felt her joy at being with her grandfather and felt satisfied that her instincts had been so correct. If she had that—her instincts—and now the ability to capture the power of the wave, she was going to be all right.
“You went deep,” Gray said, “if I could have found you I would have pulled you out sooner.”
Oh, yeah, he’d gone deep. Deep into territory he had no right going into, so deep he felt lost even now, as if he might never make his way out.
“But when one of the villagers saw the fire last night and reported it to her grandfather he knew right away she’d be here.” Gray glanced down the beach at her, frowning. “She doesn’t look like the same person, Ronan.”
Ronan was silent. She was the same person. But now she had a better idea of who that was, now, he hoped she would not be afraid to let it show, to let it shine.
He was aware of Gray’s sudden scrutiny, a low whistle. “Anything happen that I should know about?”
So, the changes were in him, too, in his face.
“No, sir.” Nothing anybody should know about. He would have to live with the fact his mistakes could have cost her her life. Because they hadn’t, no one else had to know. Ronan watched the other two boats unload. Military men, palace officials, bodyguards.
“Where’s Prince Mahail?’ he asked grimly.
“Why would he be here?”
“If I was going to marry her and she’d disappeared, I’d sure as hell be here.” But only her grandfather had come. Not her mother. Not her father. Not her fiancé. And suddenly he understood exactly why she had loved a cat so much, the loneliness, the emptiness that had driven her to say yes instead no.
But she knew herself better now. She knew what she was capable of. As far as gifts went, he thought it was a pretty good one to give her.
Gray was looking at him strangely now, then he shook it off, saying officiously, “Look, I’ve got to get you out of here. Your commanding officer is breathing down my neck. Your Excalibur team is on standby waiting to be deployed. I’ve been told, in no uncertain terms, you’d better be back when they pull the plug. I’m going to signal the helicopter to drop their ladder.”
Ronan was a soldier; he trained for the unexpected; he expected the unexpected. But somehow it caught him completely off guard that he was not going to be able to say goodbye.
The helicopter was coming in low now in response to Gray’s hand signals, sand rising around it. The ladder dropped.
Don’t think, Ronan told himself and grabbed the swaying rope ladder, caught it hard, pulled himself up to the first rung.
With each step up the ladder, he was aware of moving back toward his own life, away from what had happened here.
Moments later, hands were reaching out to haul him on board.
He made the mistake of looking down. Shoshauna was running with desperate speed. She looked as if she was going to attempt to grab that ladder, too, as if she was going to come with him if she could.
But the ladder was being hauled in, out of the way of her reaching hands. Had he really been holding his breath, hoping she would make it, hoping by some miracle she could come into his world. Was he really not ready to let go? But this was reality now, the chasms between them uncrossable, forces beyond either of their control pulling them apart.
She went very still, a small person on a beach, becoming smaller by the second. And then, standing in the center of a cyclone of dust and sand, she put her hand to her lips and sent a kiss after him. He heard the man who had hauled him in take in a swift, startled gasp at the princess’s obvious and totally inappropriate show of affection for a common man, a soldier no different from him.
But he barely registered that gasp or the startled eyes of the crew turning to him.
Jake Ronan, the most pragmatic of men, thought he felt her kiss fly across the growing chasm between him and touch his cheek, a whisper of an angel’s wings across the coarseness of his whiskers, as soft as a promise.
CHAPTER EIGHT
SHOSHAUNA looked around her bedroom. It was a beautiful room: decorated in turquoises and greens and shades of cream and ivory. Like all the rooms in her palatial home, her quarters contained the finest silks, the deepest rugs, the most valuable art. But with no cat providing lively warmth, her space seemed empty and unappealing, a showroom with no soul.
She was surrounded by toys and conveniences: a wonderful sound system; a huge TV that slid behind a screen at the push of a button; a state-of-the-art laptop with Internet access; a bathroom with spa features. But today, despite all that luxury, all those things she could occupy herself with, her room felt like a prison.
She longed for the simplicity of the island, and she felt as if she had been robbed of her last few hours with Ronan. She had thought they would at least have one more motorcycle ride together. No, she had even been robbed of her chance to say goodbye, and to ask the question that burned in her like fire.
What next?
The answer to that question lay somewhere in the six days of freedom she had experienced. She could not go back to the way her life had been before, to the way she had been before.
Where was Ronan? She still felt shocked at the abruptness of his departure. After that final night they had shared, she had wanted to say goodbye. No, needed to say goodbye.
Goodbye? That isn’t what she wanted to say! Hello. I can’t wait to know you better. I love the way I feel when I’m with you. You show me all that is best about myself.
There was a knock on her door, and she leaped off her bed and answered it, but it was one of the maids and a hairdresser.
“We’ve come to fix your hair,” the maid said cheerfully, “before you meet with Prince Mahail. I understand he’s coming this afternoon.”
Shoshauna did not stand back from the door to invite them in. She said quietly but firmly, “I happen to like my hair the way it is, and if Prince Mahail would like to see me he will have to make an appointment to see if it’s convenient for me.”
And then she shut the door, her maid’s mouth working soundlessly, a fish gasping out of water. For the first time since she had come back to this room, Shoshauna felt free, and she understood the truth: you could live in a castle and be a prisoner, you could live in a prison and be free. It was all what was inside of you.
A half hour later there was another knock on her door, the same maid, accompanied by a small boy, a street ragamuffin.
“He said,” the maid reported snippily, “he has something that he is only allowed to give to you. Colonel Peterson said it would be all right.”
The boy shyly held out the basket he was carrying and a book.
Shoshauna took the book and smiled at him. She glanced at the book. Chess Made Simple. Her heart hammering, she took the basket, heard the muted little whimper even before she rolled back the square of cloth that covered it.
An orange kitten stared at her with round green eyes.
She felt tears film her eyes, knew Ronan was gone, but that he had sent her a message.
Did he know what it said to her? Not “Learn to play chess,” not “Here’s a kitten to take the edge off loneliness.”
To her his message said he had seen the infinite potential within her.
To her his message said, “Beloved.” It said that he had heard her and seen her as no one else in her life ever had.
But then she realized this gift was his farewell gift to her. It said he would not be delivering any messages himself. Had he let his guard down so completely on that final day together because he thought he would never see her again?
Never see him again? The thought was a worse prison than this room—a life sentence.
She wanted to just slam her bedroom door and cry, but that was not the legacy of her week with Ronan. She had learned to be strong. She certainly had no intention of being a victim of her own life! No, she planned from this day forward to be the master of her destiny! To take charge, to go after what she wanted.
And to refuse what she didn’t want.
“Tell Prince Mahail I will see him this afternoon after all,” she said thoughtfully.
She realized she had to put closure on one part of her life before she began another. She did not consult her father or her mother about what she had to say to Mahail.
He was waiting for her in a private drawing room, his back to her, looking out a window. When she entered the room, she paused for a moment and studied him. He was a slight man, but handsome and well dressed.
She saw the boy who had said to her, years ago, as he was learning to ride a pony at his family’s compound, “Girls aren’t allowed.”
He turned and smiled in greeting, but the smile faltered when he saw her hair. She deliberately wore short sleeves so he could see the chunks of skin peeling off her arms, too.
He regained himself quickly, came to her and bowed, took both her hands.
“You are somewhat worse the wear for your adventure, I see,” he said, his voice sorrowful, as if she had survived a tsunami.
“Not at all,” she said, “I’ve never felt better.”
Of course he didn’t get that at all—that how she felt was so much more important than how she looked.
“I understand you have been unaccompanied in the presence of a man,” he said. “Others might see that as a smirch on your character, but of course, I do not. I understand the man’s character is unimpeachable.”
She knew she should be insulted that the man’s character was unimpeachable, but in fact it had been Ronan who had exercised self-control, not her. Still!
“How big of you,” she said. “Of course that man saved me from a situation largely of your making, but why think of that?”
“My making?” the prince stammered.
“You were cruel and thoughtless to Mirassa. She didn’t deserve that, and she retaliated. I’m not excusing what she did, but I am saying I understand it.”
The prince was beginning to look annoyed, not used to anyone speaking their mind around him, especially a woman. What kind of prison would that be? Not being able to be honest with the man you shared the most intimate things in the world with?
“And that man, whom others might see as having put a smirch on my character, was absolutely devoted to protecting me. He was willing to put my well-being ahead of his own.” To refuse everything I offered him, if he felt it wasn’t in my best interests.
“How noble,” the prince said, but he was watching her cautiously. She wasn’t supposed to speak her mind, after all, just toss her hair and blink prettily.
“Yes,” she agreed, “noble.” Ronan, her prince, so much more so than this man who stood in front of her in his silk and jewels, the aroma of his expensive cologne filling the room.
What would he say if she said she would rather smell Ronan’s sweat? She smiled at the thought, and Mahail mistook the smile for a change in mood, for coy invitation.
“Are you well enough, then, to reschedule the day of our marriage?” he asked formally.
So, despite the hair, the skin, her new outspokenness, he was not going to call it off, and suddenly she was glad, because that made it her choice, rather than his—that made it her power that had to be utilized.
She needed to choose.
“I’ve decided not to marry,” she said firmly, with no fear, no doubt, no hesitation. A bird within her took wing.
“Excuse me?” Prince Mahail was genuinely astonished.
“I don’t want to get married. I have so many things I want to achieve first. When I marry I want it to be for love, not for convenience. I’m sorry.”
He glared at her, put out. “Have you consulted your father about this?”
Of all the maddening things he could have said, that about topped her list!
“It’s my choice,” she said dangerously, “not his.”
Prince Mahail looked at her, confused, irritated, annoyed. “Perhaps it is for the best,” he decided. “I think I might like your cousin, Mirassa, better than you after all.”
“You would,” Shoshauna muttered as he marched from the room.
And yet the next day, when she met with her father, she felt terrible trepidation, aware her legs were shaking under her long skirt.
Meetings with him always had a stilted quality, formal, as if his children were more his subjects than his blood.
“I understand,” he said, without preamble, “that you have told Prince Mahail there will be no wedding.”
“Yes, Father.”
“Without consulting me?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
Shoshauna took a deep breath and told him who she was. She did not tell him she was the girl he wanted her to be, meek, docile, pliable, but she told him of longing for education and adventure…and love.
“And so you see,” she finished bravely, “I cannot marry Mahail. I am prepared to go to the dungeon first.”
Her father’s lips twitched, and then he laughed. “Come here,” he said.
As she stepped toward him, he stood up and embraced her. “I want for you what every father wants for his daughter—your happiness. A father thinks he knows best, but you have always been a strong-spirited girl, able, I think, to find your own way. Do you want to go to school?”
“Yes, Father!”
“Then it will be arranged, with my blessing.”
As she turned to go, he called her back.
“Daughter,” he said, laughing, “we don’t have a dungeon. If we did I suspect your poor mother would have locked you away in it a long time ago. I will explain this, er, latest development to her.”
“Thank you.”
Funny, she thought walking away, her whole life she had sought her father’s love and approval. And she had gotten it, finally, not when she had tried to please him, but when she had been brave enough to please herself, brave enough to be herself.
This was news she had to share with Ronan. She asked Colonel Peterson where he was.
He looked at her carefully. “He’s been deployed,” he said, “even if I knew where he was, I wouldn’t be able to tell you.”
And then she realized that was the truth Ronan had tried to tell her about his life.
And she recognized another truth: if you were going to be with a man like that, you had to have a life—satisfying and fulfilling—completely separate from his. If Ronan was going to be a part of her life, she had to come to him absolutely whole, certainly able to function when his work called him to be away.
She renewed her application for school and was accepted. In two months she would be living one more dream. She would be going to study in Great Britain.
And until then?
She was going to learn to surf! There was no room in a world like Ronan’s for a woman who was needy or clingy. She needed to go to him a woman confident in her ability to make her own life.
And then she would be a woman who could make a life with him.
An alarm was going off, and men were pouring through the doors of an abandoned warehouse, men in black, their faces covered, machine guns at the ready. Ronan was with Shoshauna, his body between her and the onslaught, but he felt things no soldier ever wanted to feel—outnumbered, hopeless, helpless. He couldn’t protect her. He was only one man…
Ronan came awake, drenched in sweat, grateful it wasn’t real, perturbed that after six months he was still having that dream, was unable to shake his sense of failure.
Slowly he became aware that the alarm from his dream was really his phone ringing. He’d picked up the phone, along with a whole pile of other things he needed, when he’d moved off base a few months ago. Next time he bought a phone, he’d know to test the damned ringer first. This one announced callers with the urgency of an alarm system announcing a break-in at the Louvre.
He got up on one elbow and looked at the caller ID window.
“Hi, Mom,” he said.
“Are you sleeping? It’s the middle of the day.”
“We’re just back from a deployment. I’m a little turned around.”
Six months ago he wouldn’t have imagined voluntarily giving his mother that information, but then, six months ago she would have been asking all kinds of questions about what he’d been up to, trying to get him to quit his job, do something safer.
Interestingly, Ronan found he wasn’t enjoying the emergency call-outs the way he once had. He recognized that adrenaline had become his fix, his drug, it had filled something in him.
It didn’t work anymore. Not since B’Ranasha. He’d felt something else then, softer, kinder, ultimately more real.
Adrenaline had been a substitute, a temporary solution to a permanent problem. Loneliness. Yearning.
He’d been asked if he would consider taking an instructor’s position with Excalibur. Maybe he was just getting older, but the idea appealed.
Now his mother didn’t even ask a single detail about the deployment, which was good. Even though she now had her own life and it had made her so much more accepting of his, Ronan thought it might set their growing trust in each other back a bit if he told her he’d just been behind the lines in a country where a military coup was in full swing rescuing the deposed prime minister.
Or, he thought, listening to the happiness in her voice, maybe not.
The big news that she had been trying to reach him about when he’d taken the wedding security position on B’Ranasha, amazingly, had nothing to do with another wedding, or at least not for her. No, she’d had an idea.
She’d wanted to know if he would invest in her new company.
But of course, that wasn’t really what she had been asking. Sometime, probably in that week with Shoshauna, Ronan had developed the sensitivity to know this.
She was really asking for an investment in her. She was asking him, fearfully, painfully, courageously, to believe in her. One last time, despite it all, please.
And isn’t that what love did? Believed? Held the faith even in the face of overwhelming evidence that to believe was naive?
The truth was he had all kinds of money. He’d had a regular paycheck since leaving high school. Renting this apartment was really the first time he’d spent any significant amount of it. His lifestyle had left him with little time and less inclination to spend his money.
Why not gamble it? His mother wanted to start a wedding-planning service and a specialized bridal boutique. Who, after all, was more of an expert on weddings than his mother? There was no sideways feeling in his stomach—not that he was at all certain it worked anymore—so he’d invested. When she’d told him she’d decided on a name for their new company, he’d expected the worst.
“‘Princess,’” she said, “the princess part in teeny letters. That’s important. And then in big letters ‘Bliss.’”
Into his telling silence she had said, “You hate it.”
That was putting it mildly. “I guess I just don’t understand it.”
“No, you wouldn’t, but Ronan, trust me, every woman dreams of being a princess, if only for a day. Especially on that day.”
And then Ronan had been pleasantly surprised and then downright astounded at his mother’s overwhelming success. Within a few months of opening, Princess Bliss had been named by Aussie Business as one of the top-ten new businesses in the country. His mother had been approached about franchising. She was arranging weddings around the globe.
“Kay Harden just called,” his mother told him breathlessly. “She and Henry Hopkins are getting married again.”
“Uh-huh,” Ronan said.
“Do you even know who they are, Jacob?”
“No, ma’am.”
“Don’t call me that! Jacob, you’re hopeless. Movie stars. They’re both movie stars.”
He didn’t care about that, he’d protected enough important people to know the truth. One important person in particular had let him know the truth.
All people, inside, were the very same.
Even soldiers.
“We’re going to have a million-dollar year!” his mother said.
Life was full of cruel ironies: Jake Ronan the man who hated weddings more than any other was going to get rich from them. He’d told his mother he would be happy just to have his initial investment back, but she was having none of it. He was a full, if silent, partner in Princess Bliss, if he liked it or not. And when he saw how happy his mother was, for the first time in his memory since his father had died, he liked it just fine.
“Mom,” he said. “I’m proud of you. I really am. Please, don’t cry.”
But she cried, and talked about her business, and he just listened, glancing around his small apartment while she talked. This was another change he’d made since coming home from B’Ranasha.
After a month back at work he had decided to give up barrack life and get his own place. The brotherhood of his comrades was no longer as comfortable as it once had been. After he’d gotten back from B’Ranasha he had felt an overwhelming desire to be alone, to create his own space, a life separate from his career.
If the apartment was any indication, he hadn’t really succeeded. Try as he might to make it homey, it just never was.
Try as he might to never think about her or that week on the island, he never quite could. He was changed. He was lonely. He hurt.
The apartment was just an indication of something else, wanting more, wanting to have more to life than his work.
And all that money piling up in his bank account, thanks to his partnership in Bliss, was an indication that something more wasn’t about money, either.
He’d contacted Gray Peterson once, a couple of days after leaving B’Ranasha. He’d been in a country so small it didn’t appear on the map, in the middle of a civil war. Trying to sound casual, which was ridiculous given the lengths he’d gone to, to get his hands on a phone, and hard to do with gunfire exploding in the background, he’d asked if she was all right.
And found out the only thing he needed to know: the marriage of Prince Mahail and Princess Shoshauna had been called off. Ronan had wanted to press for details, called off for what reason, by whom, but he’d already known that the phone call was inappropriate, that a soldier asking after a princess was not acceptable in any world that he moved in.
Ronan heard a knock on his door, got up and answered it. “Mom, gotta go. Someone’s at the door.”
Was it Halloween? A child dressed as a motorcycle rider stood on his outside step, all black leather, a helmet, sunglasses.
And then the sunglasses came off, and he recognized eyes as turquoise as the sunlit bay of his boyhood. His mouth fell open.
And then she undid the motorcycle helmet strap, and struggled to get the snug-fitting helmet from her head.
He had to stuff his hands in his pockets to keep from helping her. Finally she had it off.
He studied her hair. Possibly, her hair looked even worse than it had on the island, grown out considerably but flattened by the helmet.
“What are you doing here?” he asked gruffly, as if his heart was not nearly pounding out of his chest, as if he did not want to lift her into his arms and swing her around until she was shrieking with laughter. As if he had not known, the moment he had recognized her, that she was the something more that he yearned for, that filled him with restless energy and a sense of hollow emptiness that nothing seemed to fill.
This was his greatest fear: that with every moment he’d dedicated to helping her find her own power, he had lost some of his own.
“What am I doing here?” she said, with a dangerous flick of her hair. “Try this—‘Shoshauna, what a delightful surprise. I’m so glad to see you.’”
He saw instantly she had come into her own in ways he could not even imagine. She exuded the confidence of a woman sure of herself, sure of her intelligence, her attractiveness, her power.
“I’m going to university here now.”
That explained it. Those smart-alec university guys were probably all over her. He tried not to let the flicker of pure jealousy he felt show. In fact, he deliberately kept his voice remote. “Oh? Good for you.”
She glared at him, looked as if she wanted to stamp her foot or slap him. But then her eyes, smoky with heat, rested on his lips, and he knew she didn’t want to stamp her foot or slap him.
“I didn’t get married,” she announced in a soft, husky purr.
“Yeah, I heard.” No sense telling her he had celebrated as best he could, with a warm soda in one hand and his rifle in the other, watching the sand blow over a hostile land, wishing he had someone, something more to go home to. Feeling guilty for being distracted, wondering if he was just like his mother. Did all relationships equal a surrender of power? Wasn’t that his fear of love?
“But I have dated all kinds of boys.”
“Really.” It was a statement, not a question. He tried not to feel irritated, his sense of having given her way too much power over him confirmed! Seeing her after all this time, all he wanted to do was taste her lips, and he had to hear she was dating guys? Boys. Not men. Why did he feel faintly relieved by that distinction?
“I thought I should. You know, go out with a few of them.”
“And you stopped by to tell me that?” He folded his arms more firmly over his chest, but something twinkled in her eyes, and he had a feeling his defensive posture was not fooling her one little bit. She knew she had stormed his bastions, taken down his defenses long ago.
“Mmm-hmm. And to tell you that they were all very boring.”
“Sorry.”
“And childish.”
“Males are slow-maturing creatures,” he said. Had she kissed any of them, those boys she had dated? Of course she had. That was the way things worked these days. He remembered all too well the sweetness of her kiss, felt something both possessive and protective when he thought of another man—especially a childish one—tasting her.
“I didn’t kiss anyone, though,” she said, and the twinkle in her eyes deepened. Why was it she seemed to find him so transparent? She had always insisted on seeing who he really was, not what he wanted her to see.
He wanted to tell her he didn’t care, but he had the feeling she’d see right through that, too, so he kept his mouth shut.
“I learned to surf last summer. And I can ride a motorcycle now. By myself.”
“So I can see.”
“Ronan,” she said softly, “are you happy to see me?”
He closed his eyes, marshaled himself, opened them again. “Why are you here, Shoshauna?”
Not princess, a lapse in protocol that she noticed, too. She beamed at him.
“I want to play you a game of chess.”
He didn’t move from the doorway. A game of chess. He tried not to look at her lips. A game of chess was about the furthest thing from his poor, beleaguered male mind. “Why?” he croaked.
“If I win,” she said softly, “you have to take me on a date.”
He could have gotten her killed back there on that island. She apparently didn’t know or didn’t care, but he was not sure he’d ever be able to forgive himself or trust himself either.
“I can’t take you on a date,” he said.
“Why not? You aren’t in charge of protecting me now.”
If he was, she sure as hell wouldn’t be riding a motorcycle around by herself. But he only said, “Good thing, since I did such a crack-up job of it the first time.”
“What does that mean?”
“Don’t you ever think what could have happened if those boats that arrived that day hadn’t been the colonel and your grandfather? Don’t you ever think of what might have happened if it hadn’t been your cousin, if it had been a well-organized terror cell instead?”
There it was out, and he was glad it was out. He felt as if he had been waiting months to make this confession. Why was it always so damned easy to show her who he really was? Flawed, vulnerable, an ordinary man under his warrior armor.
“No,” she said, regarding him thoughtfully, seeing him, “I don’t. Do you?”
“I think of the possibilities all the time. I didn’t do my job, Shoshauna, I just got lucky.”
“The boys at school use that term sometimes,” she said, her voice sultry.
“Would you be serious? I’m trying to tell you something. I can’t be trusted with you. I’ve never been able to protect the people I love the most.” The look wouldn’t leave her face, as if she thought he was adorable, and so he rushed on, needing to convince her, very sorry the word love had slipped out, somehow. “I have this thing, this sideways feeling, that tells me what to do, an instinct, that warns of danger.”
“What’s it doing right now?” she asked.
“That’s just it. It doesn’t work around you!”
She touched his arm, looked up at him, her eyes so full of acceptance of him that something in him stilled. Completely.
“You know why it doesn’t work around me, Ronan? Because nothing is wrong. Nothing was wrong on the island. You were exactly where you needed to be, doing exactly what you needed to do. And so was I.”
“I forgot what I was there to do and, Shoshauna, that bugs the hell out of me. I didn’t do a good job of protecting you. I didn’t do my job, period.”
“I seem to still be here, alive and kicking.”
“Not because of anything I did,” he said stubbornly.
She regarded him with infinite patience. “Ronan, there are some things that are bigger than even you. Some things you just have to surrender to.”
“That’s the part you don’t get! Surrender is not in any soldier’s vocabulary!”
She sighed as if he was being impossible and childish just like those boys she had dated. “Thank you for the kitten, by the way. I was able to bring him with me. He’s a monster. I called him Hope.”
He wasn’t really done discussing his failures with her, but he said reluctantly, “That sounds like a girl’s name.” The name said it all, named the thing within him that he had not been able to outrun, kill, alter.
He hoped. He hoped for the life he saw promised in her eyes: a life of connection, companionship, laughter, love.
“You know what I think, Ronan?”
“You’re going to tell me if I want to know or not,” he said.
“Just like I want someone to see me for who I am, someone I don’t have to put on the princess costume for, you want someone to see you without your armor. You want someone to know there is a place where you are not all strength and sternness. You want someone to see you are not all warrior.”
“No, I don’t!”
“Now,” she said, casually, as if she had not ripped off his mask and left him feeling trembling and vulnerable and on the verge of surrendering to the mightiest thing of all, “let’s play chess. I told you the terms—if I win you have to take me on a date.”
“And if I win?” he asked.
She smiled at him, and he saw just how completely she had come into herself, how confident she was.
“Ronan,” she said softly, her smile melting him, “why on earth would you want to win?”
CHAPTER NINE
“I CAN’T believe you’d ever accept anything but my very best effort,” he said, though the truth was he already knew he was lost.
She contemplated him. “That’s true. So if you win?”
“I haven’t even agreed to play yet!”
“Well, we’ve stood at this point before, haven’t we, Ronan? Where you have to decide whether or not to let me in.”
They had stood at this point before. On the island he’d refused to play chess with her, and he’d made her cry. But then he had only been doing his job, and in the end that barrier had not been enough to keep him from caring about her.
Without that barrier where would it go?
A single word entered his mind. And oddly enough, it was not surrender. Bliss.
He stood back from his door, an admission in his heart. He was powerless against her; he had been from the very beginning. Princess Shoshauna of B’Ranasha walked into his humble apartment, took off the black jacket and tossed it on his couch as if she belonged here.
The form-fitting white silk shirt and black leather pants were at least as sexy as that bikini she had nearly driven him crazy in, and his feeling of powerlessness increased.
She looked around his place with interest. He shoved a pair of socks under the couch with his foot. She looked at him.
“I want to live in a cute little place just like this, one day.”
His mother had claimed that every girl wanted to be a princess, but somehow, someway he had lucked into something very different. A girl who had already been a princess and who wanted to be ordinary.
He got his chess set out of a cabinet, set it up at the small kitchen table.
“Why didn’t you call me?” she asked, sitting down, taking a black and a white chess piece and holding them out to him, closed fist.
He chose. Black, then. Let her lead the way.
He snorted. “Call you? You’re a princess. You’re not exactly listed in the local directory.”
“You knew how to get ahold of me, though, if you’d wanted to.”
“Yes.”
“So you didn’t want to?”
He was silent, contemplating her first move, her opening gambit. He made a defensive move.
“I couldn’t. I still dream about what could have happened on that island. I failed you. There I was snorkeling and surfing, when really I should have been setting up defenses.”
“I’d been protected all my life. You didn’t fail me. You gave me what I needed far more than safety. A wake-up call. A call to live. To be myself. You gave me a gift, Ronan. Even when you didn’t call it that, it was a gift.”
He waited.
“I needed to choose and I have. I’ve chosen.”
“To play chess with a soldier?”
“No, Ronan,” she said gently. “It was never about the chess.”
“So I see.” He was surrendering to her, just as he had on the island, even though he didn’t want to, even though he knew better. Bliss. It unfolded in him like a sail that had finally caught the wind, it filled him, it carried him forward into a brand-new land.
She beat him soundly at chess, though he might have been slightly distracted by the scent of her, by the pure heaven of having her in the same room again, by the sound of her voice, the light in her eyes, the way she ran her hand through the disaster that was her hair.
“Do you know why I dated those other boys?” she asked.
He shook his head.
“So that you wouldn’t have one single excuse to say no to me. So that you couldn’t say, ‘You only think you love me. You don’t know anyone else.’”
“Love?” he said.
She sighed. “Ronan, I made it perfectly clear it wasn’t about the chess game.”
That was true, she had.
“So,” he said, “what do you want to do for that date?”
What would a princess want to do? The opera? Live theater? Was he going to have to get a new wardrobe?
“Oh,” she said, “I want to go to a pub for fish and chips and then to a movie after. Just like an ordinary girl.”
His mother had been so wrong. Not every girl wanted to be a princess, not at all. Still, when he looked at her and smiled, he knew there was no hope she would ever be an ordinary girl, either.
And suddenly it came to him, a truth that was at the very core of humanity. A truth that was humbling and reassuring at the very same time.
Love was more powerful than he was.
He got up from his chair, came around to hers and tugged her out of it. Shoshauna came into his arms as if she was coming home.
“I guess,” he whispered against her hair, “it’s time for you to start calling me Jake.”
He picked her up for their first official date three nights later. He felt like a teenager getting ready. He wore jeans and a T-shirt, trying for just the right note of casual.
As he approached her address, he was aware that for a man who had done the most dangerous things in the world with absolute icy calm, his heart was beating faster, and his palms were sweat-slicked.
She lived on campus in what looked to be a very ordinary house until he went to the front door, rang the bell and was let in.
There were girls everywhere, short girls, tall girls, skinny girls, heavy girls. There were girls dressed to go to nightclubs and girls in their pajamas. There were girls with their hair in rollers and girls hidden behind frightening facial masks of green creams and white creams. And it seemed when he stood in that front foyer, every single one of them stopped and looked at him. Really looked.
“Sexy beast,” one of them called out. “Who are you here for?”
The last time he had blushed was when Shoshauna had kissed him on the cheek and called him Charming in that little market in B’Ranasha. She was determined to put him in predicaments that stretched him! At least now he knew a little blush wouldn’t kill him.
“I’m here for Shoshauna.” There were groans and calls of “lucky girl,” and he found himself blushing harder.
But when he saw her, coming down the steps, two at a time, flying toward him, all thought of himself, of his wild discomfort at finding himself, a man so used to a man’s world, so surrounded by women, was gone.
There was a look on her face when she saw him that he knew he would never forget, not if he lived to be 102.
It was unguarded and filled with tenderness.
A memory niggled at him, of a moment a long, long time ago. His father coming up the steps from work, in combat uniform, his mother running to meet him, a look just like the one on Shoshauna’s face now in her eyes. And he remembered how his father had looked at her. Despite the uniform, in that moment his father had not been a warrior. No, just a man, filled with wonder, gentled by love, amazed.
In the next few weeks, even though Ronan had to run the gauntlet of her housemates every time he saw her, he spent every moment he could with her. Every second they could wangle away from hectic schedules, they were together. Simple moments—a walk, holding hands, eating pizza, playing darts at the pub—simple moments became infused with a light from heaven.
Ronan was aware that, left to his own devices, he would have performed his duties perfectly on B’Ranasha. He would have been a perfect professional, he would never have allowed himself to become personally involved with the principal.
And he would have missed this: the tenderness, the sweetness of falling head over heels in love. But somehow, some way, a kind universe had taken pity on him, given him what he needed the most, even though he had been completely unaware of that need. Even though he had strenuously denied that need and tried to fight against it.
Falling in love with Shoshauna was like waking from a deep hypnotic state. When he woke in the morning, his first thought was of her. He felt as if he was living to make her laugh, to feel the touch of her hand, to become aware of her eyes resting on his face, something in them so unguarded and so breathtakingly, exquisitely beautiful.
For some reason he, a rough soldier, had come to be loved by a woman like this one. He planned to be worthy of it.
Shoshauna looked around, let the trade winds lift her hair. There was a flower-laced pagoda set up on the beach, the royal palace of B’Ranasha white and beautiful in the background. They had tried to keep things small, but even so the hundred chairs facing the wedding pagoda were filled. The music of a single flute intertwined with the music of the waves that lapped gently on the sand.
Jake’s mother, Bev, had managed to get over her disappointment that, despite the fact it was a royal wedding, her first, they wanted nothing elaborate. Now Shoshauna saw why her mother-in-law’s business was so successful: she had read their hearts and given them exactly what they wanted—simplicity—the beauty provided by the ocean, the white-capped waves in the blue bay the perfect backdrop to the day.
Shoshauna wore a simple white sheath, her feet were bare, she had a single flower in her hair.
She watched from the tree line as Jake made his way across the sand and felt the tears rise in her eyes. Beloved.
He was flanked by Gray Peterson, just as he had been the first time she had seen him, but this time Jake looked calm and relaxed, a man at ease despite the formality of the black suit he was wearing, the people watching him, the fact it was his wedding day.
It had been almost a year since she had first laid eyes on him, six months since she had won her first date with him in that chess match.
Since then there had been so much laughter as they discovered a brand-new world together—a world seen through the viewfinder of love.
They had ridden motorcycles, gone to movies, walked hand in hand down rain-filled streets, played chess and done nothing at all. Everything was equally as astounding when she did it with him.
He was so full of surprises. Who would have ever guessed he had such a romantic nature hidden under that stern exterior? The kitten as a gift should have been her first clue! He was constantly surprising her with heart-felt or funny little gifts: a tiara he’d gotten at a toy store; a laser pointer that drove the kitten, Hope, to distraction; a book of poems; a pink bikini that she would use now, for the first time, on her honeymoon.
And the stern exterior was just that. An exterior. She’d always thought he was good-looking, but now the hard lines on his face were relaxed around her, and the stern mask was gone from his eyes. The remoteness was gone from him and so was his need to exercise absolute control over everything. Jake Ronan seemed to have enjoyed every second of letting go of control, seeing where life—and love—would take them, if they gave it a chance.
It had taken them to this day and this moment. He stood at the pagoda, his eyes searched the tree line until they found her.
And he smiled.
In his smile she saw such welcome and such wonder—and such sensual promise—that her own heart beat faster.
Of course, there was one thing they had not done, one area where he had maintained every ounce of his formidable discipline. Jake Ronan had proven to be very old-fashioned when it came to the question of her virtue.
Oh, he had kissed her until she had nearly died from wanting him, he had touched her in ways that had threatened to set her heart on fire, but always at the last moment he had pulled away. He had told her his honor was on the line, and she had learned you did not question a warrior’s honor!
But tonight she would lie in his arms, and they would discover the breathtaking heights of intimacy. After the reception, they would take her grandfather’s boat, and they would go to their island, Naidina Karobin, my heart is home. The island would be once again inhabited only by them.
Last night, even though he wasn’t supposed to see her until today, Jake had managed to charm his way past all her girlfriends and her cousins and aunts.
“I brought you a wedding present.”
“You’re not supposed to be here,” she told him, but not with a great deal of conviction. She loved seeing him.
“I know. I couldn’t stay away. Knowing you were here, just a few minutes away from me, I couldn’t not be with you. Shoshauna, that’s what you do to me. Here I am, just about the most disciplined guy in the world, and I’m helpless around you. Worse,” he moved closer to her, touched her cheek with the familiar hardness of his hands, “I like being helpless. You make me want to be with you all the time. You make everything that is not you seem dull and boring and like a total waste of time.
“You make me feel as if all those defenses I had, had kept me prisoner in a world where I was very strong but very, very alone. You rescued me.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “Ronan, you could not have given me a more beautiful gift than those words.”
He smiled, a little bit sheepishly. “There’s still enough soldier in me that I don’t see words as any kind of gift.” He opened the door and brought in what he had left in the hallway.
She burst out laughing. That’s what he did to her, and for her—took her from tears to laughter and back again in the blink of an eye.
A brand-new surfboard, and she had been delighted, but at the same time she rather hoped, much as she was stoked about surfing, that the waves would never come up. She rather hoped they would never get out of bed! Not for the whole two weeks. That she could touch him until she had her fill of the feel of his skin under her fingertips, until she had her fill of the taste of his lips, and she already knew she was never going to get her fill of that!
Shoshauna was still blushing from the audacity of her own thoughts when her mother and her father came up beside her, not a king and a queen today but proud parents. Each of them kissed her on the cheek and then took their seats.
Her father in particular was very taken with Jake. Her mother had been more slow to come around, but no one who truly got to know Jake could do anything but love him.
Her mother had also been appalled by the simplicity of the wedding plans, but she and Bev had managed to console each other and had become quite good friends as they planned the wedding of their children.
Her grandfather came to her side, linked his arm through hers, smiled at her, though his eyes were wet with tears of joy.
And then Shoshauna was moving across the sand toward her beloved, toward Jake Ronan, and she could see the whole future in his eyes. Her grandfather let her go, and she walked the last few steps to him on her own, a woman who had chosen exactly the life she wanted for herself.
Jake watched Shoshauna move toward him across the fineness of the pure white sand.
She had chosen the simplest of dresses, her feet were bare, but when you were as beautiful as she was, even his mother had agreed that simplicity was the best way to let her true beauty shine through.
His mother and his wife-to-be, here together.
And in him the most wonderful surrender. He would protect them with his life, if he ever had to, and they both knew that.
Someday he would have children with Shoshauna, and he could feel the fierce protectiveness within himself extend to them, but something new was there, too.
A trust, that he would do whatever he could do, but when his strength ran dry, then there would be something else there to step in, something that seemed to have a better plan for him than anything he could have ever planned for himself, if the woman walking over the sand toward him was any indication.
He knew that something went by a great many names. Some called it the Universe, the life force, God.
He had come to call it Love, and to recognize it had been running the show long before he’d come along, and would be running it long after.
There came a point when a man had to realize that there were things he did not control, and that he would only exhaust himself, drain away his strength and his soul, if he continued to think the whole world would fall apart if he was not running it.
Ronan had come to believe that he could trust the protection and care of a force larger than himself.
It was the same force that brought a certain man and a certain woman together, against impossible odds, across cultural and social differences, the force that made one heart recognize another.
And it was that force that would protect them and see their children into the world.
Once upon a time Jake Ronan had thought if he ever had to stand where he was standing today, he would probably faint.
And yet the truth was, he had never felt so calm, so strong, so right. And the strangest thing of all was that, even as Ronan admitted he was powerless in the face of this thing called love, with each day of his surrender he felt more powerful, more alive and more relaxed, more grateful, more everything.
This was the something more he had longed for all his life: to be a part of the magnificent mystery that flowed around him and in him as surely as it flowed through the waves on the sea. He longed to ride that incredible energy with the ease and joy with which he could ride the most powerful of waves. Not to conquer but to feel connected.
He watched Shoshauna move toward him, and he almost laughed out loud.
For one thing he had come to know that this thing he chose to call Love had the most delicious sense of humor.
And for the longest time he had thought it was his job to rescue the princess.
But now he saw that wasn’t it at all.
That she had come to rescue him. And that allowing himself to be rescued had not made him a weaker man but a better one.
She reached him, looked him in the face, his equal, the woman who would be the mother of his children, his companion, his friend, his lover through all the days of his life.
“Beloved,” she said, her voice hushed with reverence of what they stood in the presence of, that Force greater than all things. “Retnuh.”
And he said to her, his eyes never leaving her face, in her own language, a greeting and a vow, “My heart is home.”
The Secret Princess
Jessica Hart
For my dear niece, Suzy,
with love on her engagement.
CHAPTER ONE
WAVING her hands around her head in a futile attempt to bat the midges away, Lotty paused for breath at the crest of the track. Below her, an austere granite house was planted between a forbidding sweep of hillside and a loch so still it mirrored the clouds and the trees clustered along the water’s edge.
Loch Mhoraigh House. It looked isolated and unfriendly and, according to all reports in the village, its owner was the same.
‘He’s the worst boss I’ve ever had.’ Gary had been drowning his sorrows in the Mhoraigh Hotel bar all afternoon and his words were more than a little slurred. ‘Not a smile, not a good morning, just straight to work! I told him if I’d wanted to work in a labour camp, I’d have signed up for one. It’s not as if he’s paying more than slave wages either, and he won’t get anyone else. I told him what he could do with his job!’
‘Quite right too.’ Elsie, the barmaid, polished glasses vindictively and warned Lotty against making the trek out to Loch Mhoraigh House. ‘We don’t want Corran McKenna around here. The Mhoraigh estate should have gone to his brother, we all know that,’ she said, hinting darkly at some family feud that Lotty didn’t quite follow. ‘Nobody from the village will work for him. You go on up to Fort William,’ she told Lotty. ‘You’ll find a job there.’
But Lotty couldn’t afford to go any further. Without her purse, she was penniless, and when you needed money, you got yourself a job, right?
Or so she had heard. The truth was that until an hour earlier, when she had realised that her purse was missing, Lotty had never in her life had to think about money at all.
Now she did.
It was Lotty’s first challenge, and she was determined to rise to it. Her life was so luxurious, so protected. She understood why, of course, but it meant that she had never once been tested and, until you were, how did you know who you were and what you were made of? That was what these few short weeks were all about. Was there any more to Her Serene Highness Princess Charlotte of Montluce than the stylish clothes and the gracious smile that were all the rest of the world saw?
Lotty needed to know that more than anyone.
Here was her first chance to find out. When you didn’t have any money, you had to earn some. Lotty set her slim shoulders and hoisted her rucksack onto her back. If everyone else could do it, she could too.
Three miles later, she was very tired, tormented by midges and, looking doubtfully down at the unwelcoming house, it occurred to Lotty, belatedly, that she could be making a terrible mistake. Loch Mhoraigh House was very remote, and Corran McKenna lived alone out here. Was it safe to knock on his door and ask if he could give her a job? What if Elsie had been right, and he was a man who couldn’t be trusted? Elsie’s dislike of him seemed to be based on the fact that he wasn’t a real Scot, and she had implied that he had acquired the estate under false pretences.
It wasn’t as if she didn’t have a choice, Lotty knew that. One phone call, and a close protection team would be on its way within minutes. A helicopter would swoop down and scoop her up, and take her back to the palace in Montluce. There would be no midges there, no money worries, no need to put herself at risk. There would just be her grandmother to face, and the knowledge of her own uselessness. She would be the princess who ran away and couldn’t last a week on her own.
Lotty grimaced at the thought of the humiliation. Three months, she had agreed with Philippe and Caro. Three months to disappear, to be anonymous, to see for herself what she was made of. She couldn’t give up at the first difficulty, and slink home with her tail between her legs.
She was a princess of Montluce, Lotty reminded herself, and her chin lifted. Her family hadn’t kept an iron grip on the country since the days of Charlemagne by giving up the moment the going got tough. She had been raised on the stories of the pride and courage that had kept Montluce independent for so long: Léopold Longsword, Princess Agathe who had been married off to a German prince nearly fifty years her senior in order to keep the succession safe, and of course the legendary Raoul the Wolf.
They had faced far greater challenges than Lotty. All she had to do was find herself a job. Was she going to be the first of the Montvivennes to accept defeat?
No, Lotty vowed, she wasn’t.
Lotty adjusted her rucksack more comfortably on her back, and set off down the rough track towards Loch Mhoraigh House.
The house loomed grey and massive as Lotty trudged wearily up to the front door. An air of neglect clung to everything. Weeds were growing in what had once been an impressive gravel drive and the windows were cold and cheerless. It was very quiet. No lights, no music, no sign of anyone living there. Only the crows wheeling above the Scots pines and the cry of some bird down by the loch.
Lotty hesitated, looking at the old-fashioned bell. What if Corran McKenna wasn’t there? She wasn’t sure her feet could take her back up that hill.
But what if he was? Lotty chewed her bottom lip uncertainly. She had never had to persuade anyone to give her a job before. She’d never really had to persuade anyone to do anything. Normally people fell over themselves to give her whatever she wanted. She led a charmed and privileged existence, Lotty knew, but it made it a lot harder to prove that she was a worthy successor to all those doughty ancestors who had fought and negotiated and bargained and married to keep Montluce free.
They wouldn’t have been deterred by a simple no, and neither would she.
For these few weeks, she had abandoned her title and her household. There was no one to arrange things for her, no one to make sure she got exactly what she wanted.
She was going to have to do this for herself.
Taking a deep breath, Lotty pressed the bell.
She could hear it clanging inside the house somewhere. Immediately, a furious barking erupted. It sounded as if there was a whole pack of dogs in there, and instinctively Lotty took a step back. There was a sharp command and the dogs subsided, except for a high-pitched yapping that continued until it was suddenly stifled as a door was shut firmly on it.
A few moments later, the front door was jerked open.
A tall, tough-looking man, as forbidding as the hills behind the house, stood there. He was younger than Lotty had expected, with dark, uncompromising features and a stern mouth, and his eyes were a pale, uncanny blue.
‘Yes?’
‘I’ve c-come about the job,’ said Lotty, cursing the stammer that still resurfaced at times when she was nervous. Raoul the Wolf wouldn’t have stammered, she was sure.
His fierce brows snapped together. ‘Job? What job?’
‘I heard in the hotel that you needed help restoring some cottages to let.’
‘News travels fast…or did Gary stop at the bar on his way back to Glasgow?’ Corran added with a sardonic look.
Lotty brushed at the midges that clustered at her ears. Raoul the Wolf wouldn’t have put up with being left on the doorstep either, but she could hardly insist that he invite her inside. She concentrated on sounding reasonable instead. ‘He said you didn’t have anyone else and that you’d be stuck without anyone to work for you.’
‘And did he also say that it was the worst job he’d ever done, not to mention being the worst paid, and having the worst boss?’
‘Something like that.’
‘And yet you want to work for me?’
‘I’m desperate,’ said Lotty.
The pale eyes inspected her. Lotty had never been the subject of that kind of unnerving scrutiny before and, in spite of herself, she stiffened. No one in Montluce would dare to look at her like that.
‘Forgive me for saying so, but you don’t look desperate,’ said Corran McKenna. He nodded at the high tech walking trousers and microfleece she’d bought in Glasgow only four days earlier. ‘Those clothes you’re wearing are brand new, and the labels tell me they weren’t cheap. Besides,’ he said, ‘you’re not suitable for the job.’
‘Why not?’
‘You’re not a man, for a start.’
‘That’s not a good enough reason,’ said Lotty, who might not want to rely on her royal status to protect her, but didn’t have to like his dismissive tone. ‘I think you’ll find there’s such a thing as sex discrimination.’
‘And I think you’ll find I don’t give a toss,’ said Corran. ‘I need someone strong enough to do physical work, not someone whose most strenuous activity is probably unscrewing her mascara.’
Lotty’s eyes sparked with temper. All at once she could feel her celebrated ancestors ranging at her back.
‘I’m not wearing mascara,’ she said coldly, ‘and I’m stronger than I look.’
For answer, Corran McKenna reached out and took her hands, turning them over as if they were parcels so that he could inspect them. His fingers were long and blunt, and they looked huge holding her small hands. He ran his thumbs over her palms and Lotty burned at the casualness of his touch.
‘Please don’t try and tell me that you’ve ever done a day’s rough work in your life,’ he said.
‘That doesn’t mean I can’t start now.’ Lotty tugged her hands free. ‘Please,’ she said, trying to ignore the way her palms were still tingling. If she looked down, she was sure she would be able to see the impression of his fingertips seared onto her skin. ‘I really need this job.’
‘I really need someone suitable,’ said Corran. ‘I’m sorry, but the answer is still no. And don’t bother looking at me like that with those big eyes,’ he added crisply. ‘I’m immune.’
Her jaw actually dropped. ‘I’m not looking at you like…like anything!’
She did astounded very well, but Corran found it hard to believe that she could really be unaware of the power of those luminous grey eyes. They were extraordinarily beautiful, the colour of soft summer mist, and fringed with long black lashes that did indeed appear to be natural when he looked closely.
The kind of eyes that got a man into trouble. Big trouble.
She was very pretty, slender and fine-boned, and she wore her trekking gear with an elegance that sat oddly with the short, garish red hair. A soft scarf at her throat added a subtle sophistication to her look.
Corran had the best of reasons for distrusting sophistication.
Frowning, he looked behind her for a car, but the overgrown gravel drive was empty. ‘How did you get here?’
‘I walked from the hotel,’ she said, eyeing him warily.
‘It didn’t occur to you to ring beforehand?’ he asked, exasperated. ‘It would have saved you a pointless walk.’
‘My phone doesn’t work here,’ she said.
‘If it’s a mobile, it won’t. That’s why we still have landlines,’ he explained as if to a child.
‘Oh.’
She sounded disconcerted. Corran could almost swear she had never used an ordinary telephone in her life. Maybe she hadn’t. Privilege was written in every line of her face, in the tilt of her chin, and cheekbones like that only came from generations of aristocratic inbreeding.
He hardened his heart against the pleading in those huge grey eyes. Desperate? She was probably down to her last hundred thousand.
‘Oh, well…I like to walk,’ she said, recovering.
‘You look ready to drop,’ Corran told her frankly. ‘How far have you walked today?’
‘Sixteen miles.’
Great. Sixteen miles, and he was supposed to let her walk back to the hotel? Corran sighed in exasperation as he faced up to the inevitable. ‘What’s your name?’
‘Lotty,’ she said. A moment of hesitation. ‘Lotty Mount.’
Now why didn’t he believe her? ‘All right, Lotty, you wait there. I’ll get my keys.’
Her face lit up. ‘You’re going to let me stay?’
‘No,’ said Corran, ignoring the disturbing kick of his pulse. ‘I’m going to drive you back to the Mhoraigh Hotel.’
She looked at him in dismay as she waved at the midges. ‘I don’t want to go back there!’
‘Frankly, I don’t care what you want,’ he said, irritated that he had actually started to feel guilty there for a moment, irritated even more by the fact that his pulse still hadn’t quite settled. ‘I want you off my property. There’s no way you can walk back to the hotel and my reputation’s bad enough round here without you collapsing halfway.’
‘I’m not going to collapse,’ she protested. ‘And I’ve no intention of getting in a car with you,’ she added as an afterthought.
‘It’s a bit late to start having scruples, having walked all the way out here,’ Corran pointed out. ‘There’s just me and the dogs.’
‘Well, anyway, I’d rather walk back,’ Lotty said stiffly. ‘It’s a nice evening.’
Corran glanced up at the sky. As so often in Scotland, the day had started murky, but cleared in the afternoon, and now, at almost seven, only a few wispy clouds lurked low on the horizon. At this time of year it wouldn’t get dark for hours yet. The hills were a soft blue, the water still and silver, the air almost golden. Lotty was right. It was a fine evening.
But there was not a breath of air to riffle the surface of the loch, which meant no breeze to blow the curse of the Highlands away.
‘The midges will eat you alive,’ he said, watching her slap at her neck below her ear. ‘If they haven’t already.’
‘I’ll be fine.’ She lifted her chin. ‘I’d rather walk,’ she added and bent to heave the rucksack onto her back. Corran saw her wince at the weight of it on her shoulders, and he scowled.
‘Don’t be ridiculous, woman,’ he said irritably. ‘You can’t walk all the way back if you’ve already done sixteen miles today.’ He pointed a finger at her. ‘Stay there. I’m going to get my car keys.’
He was gone less than two minutes, but by the time he came back Lotty was already toiling up the track.
‘Fine!’ he shouted after her. ‘Be stubborn! Just don’t collapse on my land!’
‘I won’t,’ she called over her shoulder.
Frustrated, Corran stood at the door and watched the slight figure. Her head was held high, but he could tell what an effort it was, and he swore again.
What was she thinking, hiking three miles to a strange house just on the off chance of a job? It wasn’t safe. He could be anybody.
Corran glowered. He had enough problems of his own without worrying about Lotty, if that really was her name, but he watched her with a frown in his eyes until she had rounded the bend. He would give her half an hour or so and then go and see how far she had got. She would have proved her point by then, and would no doubt be more than grateful for a lift.
But when he drove along the track later, there was no sign of her. He went all the way to Mhoraigh, although he didn’t go inside the hotel. The locals had made it quite clear what they thought of him, and if she had made it that far, she was perfectly safe.
The girl wasn’t his responsibility, anyway. Putting the Land Rover into a three point turn, Corran headed back to Loch Mhoraigh House and told himself he wasn’t going to think any more about her.
Still, he slept badly, and he was in an irritable mood when he set off for the cottages the next morning. The dogs ran eagerly ahead, past the old stable block and the walled garden, past the ruined boathouse and the track leading up to the barns and out beside the loch to the dilapidated cottages that had been built by his great-great-grandfather for the estate workers in the days when Loch Mhoraigh had been a thriving estate.
It had rained during the night, and the air was fresh and sweet with the smell of bracken from the hills. Corran thought longingly of the high corries, but he couldn’t afford to take a day off, especially now that he would have to advertise for more help. Gary had only lasted two days. That made him think about the girl, Lotty, and he shook his head. Quite how she had expected to do the job, he didn’t know. She didn’t look strong enough to lift that rucksack.
Although she had, now he came to think of it.
He would finish the plastering in the first cottage, Corran decided, then he would advertise in the local paper—again. He could do that online. He was mentally composing an advert that made the job sound attractive while simultaneously making it clear that the successful applicant would have to work till he dropped for a meagre wage when he realised that Meg had frozen at the cottage door, which stood open although Corran knew that he had closed it when he left the day before.
Meg dropped to her belly and lay alert and quivering as Corran came up. He frowned. ‘What is it, Meg?’ He looked around him, and his brows drew even closer together. ‘And where’s that other damned dog?’
Telling Meg to stay, he stepped inside the cottage. The door on the left led into the living room, and there, sure enough, was his mother’s dog, fawning over the girl who had turned up on his doorstep the night before.
The girl whose stricken expression had sent him on a fool’s errand to the village just to make sure that she hadn’t collapsed in a heap in the middle of the track.
For a long moment, Corran couldn’t trust himself to speak.
She had abandoned her rucksack somewhere, and was in the same clothes she had worn the day before, except that now the scarf was knotted around her head like a Fifties housewife, which should have looked absurd but somehow looked chic instead. Her sleeves were rolled up in a businesslike way. She had clearly been sweeping up sawdust, and she still held the broom in her hands as she crouched down to make a fuss of the dog.
At Corran’s entrance, though, she straightened. ‘Good m-morning,’ she said brightly, and he heard the slight stammer he’d noticed yesterday. Corran guessed that it only happened when she was nervous.
As well she might be.
‘What the hell are you doing here?’ he demanded, which he thought was fairly restrained under the circumstances.
‘Well, I could see you’ve been working in here, so I thought I could start c-clearing up.’
‘Oh, did you? And what part of me telling you that I wasn’t going to give you a job and wanted you off my property didn’t you understand?’
The soft mouth set in a stubborn line. ‘I wanted to prove that I could do the job. All I’m asking is a chance to show you what I can do.’
‘I drove all the way to Mhoraigh last night in case you’d collapsed on the track,’ Corran told her furiously. ‘Are you telling me you were here all the time?’
‘There was some straw in the barn. I slept there.’
It had easily been the most uncomfortable night of Lotty’s life. In spite of her exhaustion, she hadn’t slept at all. Late in May, the night had still been cool and, even wearing all her clothes, she had been cold and bitterly regretting that she had ever heard of Loch Mhoraigh.
Why hadn’t she tried harder to persuade the hotel to give her a job of some kind, just until she had earned enough to move on to Fort William? But she had chosen to come out here, and now pride wouldn’t let her accept Corran McKenna’s casual dismissal. She might not be using her title, but she was still a princess of Montluce.
Not that pride had been much comfort as Lotty had shivered on the straw and suffered the midges that swarmed through the cracks in the old barn doors. Now she wanted nothing so much as a shower and a cup of coffee.
But first she had to convince Corran to let her stay.
He wasn’t looking at all encouraging. His brows were drawn together in a ferocious glare and his mouth set in what could only be called an uncompromising line. Lotty couldn’t, in truth, really blame him for being angry, but how was she to know that he would be chivalrous enough to drive out and make sure that she was all right? If he was going to be nice, why couldn’t he just give her the job?
It was time to be conciliatory, she decided. Some victories were won by battles, but sometimes negotiation won just as effective a result. Lotty had learnt that from her family history too.
‘Look, I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I know I’m trespassing, but I can do this job—I can!’ she insisted at Corran’s expression. ‘Gary—the guy I met at the hotel—told me he’d been cleaning and painting, and I can do that.
‘You don’t even need to pay me,’ she went on quickly as Corran opened his mouth. ‘I heard you can’t afford to pay much in the way of wages, and I’m prepared to work in exchange for somewhere to stay.’
He paused at that, and she pressed on, encouraged. ‘Why not give me a chance? I’m not going to cost you anything, and I’m better than no one, surely?’
‘That rather depends on how useful you can be,’ he said grimly. ‘I hope you’re not going to try and tell me you’ve got any building experience?’
‘I know how important it is to keep a building site clean,’ said Lotty, who had once laid the foundation stone of a new hospital and had been impressed by the neatness of the site. She’d assumed that it had been tidied up for her arrival, as things usually were, but the foreman had assured her that wasn’t the case. He wouldn’t tolerate mess on his site at any time. ‘An untidy site is a dangerous site,’ she quoted him to Corran.
‘And just how many building sites have you been on?’ he asked, clearly unconvinced.
Lotty thought of the construction sites she’d been shown around over the years. Her father, the Crown Prince, had been more interested in Ancient Greece than in modern day Montluce, and after her mother had died it had fallen to Lotty to take on the duties of royal consort.
‘You’d be surprised,’ she said.
Corran studied her through narrowed eyes. ‘Would I, indeed?’
Oh, dear, she was supposed to be allaying his suspicions, not arousing them. Lotty bent to pat the little dog who was fussing at her ankles still.
‘Look, I can see that in an ideal world you’d employ someone with building skills,’ she said, ‘but I gather experienced tradesmen aren’t exactly queuing up to work for you, so why not give me a try until you find someone else? What can be so hard about cleaning and painting, after all? And at least my services will come free.’
Corran was thinking about what she’d said, Lotty could tell. She held her breath as he rubbed a hand over his jaw until she began to feel quite dizzy. It might have been lack of oxygen but it was something to do with that big hand too, with the hard line of his jaw. It didn’t look as if he had shaved that morning and Lotty found herself wondering what it would be like to run her own hand down his cheek and feel the prickle of stubble beneath her fingers.
The thought made her flush and she tore her gaze away and got her breathing back in order. Taking a firmer hold of the broom, she went back to tidying up the curls of wood and sawdust that covered the floor. No harm in giving Corran McKenna a demonstration of what she could do. It might not be the most skilled job in the world, but a quick look round the cottage had shown her that there was plenty of cleaning to be done.
‘I’m not denying that I’ve found it hard to find anyone prepared to stick the job longer than a few days,’ Corran said at last.
‘I gather you might need to work on your management skills,’ said Lotty, still sweeping.
‘I see you and Gary had a good chat!’ Corran snorted in disgust. ‘All he had to do was plaster a few walls. Why the hell would he need managing?’
‘Well, you know, an encouraging word every now and then might have helped,’ she suggested before she could help herself. ‘Not that I’d need any encouragement,’ she added hastily.
‘No encouragement, no money…’ Corran watched her brushing ineffectually at the floor and looked as if he couldn’t understand whether to be intrigued or exasperated. ‘I don’t understand why you’re so keen to work here. Why not look for a job where you’d get paid at least?’
‘I can’t afford to go anywhere else.’ She might as well tell him, Lotty decided. ‘I lost my purse yesterday.’
It had been so stupid of her. She just wasn’t used to being careful about her things. There was always someone who would pick things up for her, deal with settling any bills, check that she hadn’t left anything behind.
‘I haven’t got money for a cup of coffee, let alone a bus fare.’
Corran’s look of suspicion only deepened. ‘When most women lose their purses they go to the police,’ he pointed out. ‘They don’t set off into the wilds to doorstep strange men, insist on jobs they’re not qualified to do, and trespass on private property!’
Lotty flushed. ‘I’m sorry, but I didn’t know what else to do.’
‘What about calling your bank or credit card company for a start?’
How could she explain that a phone call to her bank would likely have led straight back to Montluce, where her grandmother would have the entire security service looking for her?
‘I don’t want anyone to know where I am,’ she said after a moment.
Corran’s black brows snapped together. ‘Are you in trouble with the police?’ he asked.
For a moment Lotty toyed with the idea of pretending she had pulled off a diamond heist, but she abandoned it regretfully. Corran’s eyes were too observant and she would never be able to carry it off.
‘It’s nothing like that.’ She moistened her lips. She would have to tell him something. ‘The thing is, I…I needed to get away for a while,’ she began carefully.
It went against the grain to lie, and her grandmother would be horrified at the idea of her denying her royal heritage, but Lotty was determined to spend the next few weeks incognito.
‘My mother always talked about the time she walked the Highland Way, and I thought it would be a good idea to walk it for her again, the way I always told her I would, and think about what I wanted to do with my life.’
So far, so true. Lotty had spent long hours sitting with her mother when she was dying. She had held her thin hand and kept a reassuring smile on her face all the time so that her mother wouldn’t worry. She’d only been twelve, but she hadn’t once cried the way she wanted to, because her grandmother had told her that she was a princess of Montluce and she had to be as brave as all the princesses before her.
There was no need to tell Corran about giving her close protection officer the slip in Paris, or about the crossing to Hull, where she was fairly sure she wouldn’t meet anyone she knew, and where she’d had her hair cut in a funny little place upstairs on a side street.
She had dyed it herself that night, just to make sure she was unrecognizable, but the colour wasn’t anything like it had promised on the box. She had been horrified when she looked in the mirror and saw that it had gone bright red. She looked awful! The only comfort was that no one would ever, ever associate Princess Charlotte with red hair. She was famous for her sleek dark bob and stylish wardrobe, and there was certainly nothing sleek or stylish about her now.
Apart from the hair fiasco, Lotty had been pleased with herself that night. She had got herself across the Channel, and she was on her own. Not a huge adventure for most people, but for Lotty it was a step into the unknown. She was free!
Only sitting in that tiny hotel room, Lotty had realised that now there was no one to organize her day for her, she didn’t quite know what to do with herself. That was when the idea of walking the Highland Way her mother had loved so much had jumped into her head. She had taken a train to Glasgow the next day, left her case in a locker at the station, and set off with a rucksack on her back.
‘It was wonderful,’ she told Corran. ‘There’s a very clear track, and other people are walking. I was having a great time, until I stopped for lunch yesterday. I had a sandwich at a pub, so I must have had my purse there, but when I got to the hotel at Mhoraigh I realised that I didn’t have it any more. They were so kind at the hotel, and looked up the phone number of the pub for me, but, when I rang, they didn’t know anything about my purse. I’d hoped someone might have found it and handed it in.’
She actually looked surprised that her purse, clearly stuffed with cash and platinum credit cards, hadn’t been handed back to her intact! She was the most extraordinary mix of sophistication and naivety, thought Corran.
He’d been listening to her story, unsure what to make of her. Clearly, she wasn’t telling him everything with all this vague talk of getting away. It occurred to him that she might be a celebrity who needed to hide away from the media for a while. Not because he recognised her—Corran had no interest in the so called high life, as his ex wife could attest—but because there was a starry quality to her somehow, a certain purity to her features and a luminous presence that even her dusty, straw-flecked fleece and the insect bites on her face couldn’t disguise.
She reminded him of the roe deer he had seen from his bedroom window early that morning. It had paused in a pool of light and lifted its head, graceful and wary. Lotty had the same kind of innocence in her eyes, an innocence that didn’t go with the expensive clothes and the style with which she wore that ridiculous scarf around her head.
Then he caught himself up. What was the matter with him? Any minute now he’d be spouting poetry when what he should be doing was remembering just how easily a beautiful woman could tie you up in knots. Corran scowled at the memory. Nothing Lotty had told him had made him any less suspicious of her motives.
Ücretsiz ön izlemeyi tamamladınız.