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Kitabı oku: «A New Catalogue of Vulgar Errors», sayfa 7

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XXIX

That planting Aquatics upon Banks in the Fenns, will preserve and strengthen them, so as to render them more able to resist the Force of a Flood.

What will be asserted in this Chapter is not the Result of Surmise, but is what I have been an Eye Witness of. Be it known then unto all those, who think proper to do this Book so much Honour as to give it a Perusal, that the Author is a Fenman: Why should he be ashamed of his Native Country? A Country, where they have Inverted the following Lines of Horace:

 
Omne cum Proteus pecus egit altos
Visere Montes:
Piscium & summâ genus hæsit Ulmo,
Nota quæ sedes fuerat columbis,
Et superjecto pavidæ natarunt
Æquore Dammæ.
 

For here, instead of those Places which were the Habitations of Doves, being visited by Fish, just the contrary has happened. By the Ingenuity of these People, barren Sands, over which Ships used to ride at Anchor, are changed into pleasant Meadows and rich Inclosures.

Having now shewn how much of a Fenman we are, it will be proper to return to the Subject.

There can be no Doubt, but that every Attempt which is made to promote the Improvement of Agriculture, is highly commendable; and on the other Hand, it is the Duty of every one, to endeavour to rectify such of those Attempts as he knows, as well from his own Experience, as from the Conversation of skilful Engineers, to be erroneous: And we are sorry to say, we are very clear that the Scheme of planting Aquatics upon Banks in the Fenns, notwithstanding what has been affirmed about it, is so far from being likely to strengthen such Banks, that it is a certain Way to destroy them.

In order to make some of our Readers, who live in the high Country, sensible of the Truth of what will be here asserted, it will be necessary to explain the Nature of Fenn-Draining, which shall be done in as few Words as possible.

Water is a Fluid, as has been before observed; and it is the Nature of a Fluid to be always endeavouring to restore an Equilibrium in it's Parts, which we may observe by it's restless Motion after the Surface of it is made uneven. It is in order to restore this Equilibrium, that Water rushes down with such Rapidity, from the high Country into the Fenns; where, when it has got, the Surface of the whole Country being even, and in general no higher than the Bottom of the adjacent Seas, it remains quiet; Fenn-Draining, therefore, must be a Work of Art. – Now let us examine into the Principles of this Art.

The first Thing to be done is, to scour out the Bottoms of the Rivers, which run through them, from Sand and Filth, and by that Means to make a good Outfall; then to make Banks of Earth on the Sides of those Rivers, to prevent, as much as possible, the Water which comes down in a Flood from overflowing the Country, as well as to retain such Water as shall be thrown into the Rivers by Engines. It will be needless here to describe the Machinery of a Water Engine; it will be sufficient to say, that Drains are cut which lead from these Engines to the Rivers, which Drains are banked likewise, and that these Engines, by the Help of the Wind, have a Power of Drawing the Water from the Lands which are drowned, into these Drains, till they are quite full, and till the Water has got to a Level which is higher than the Bottom of the adjacent Sea; and by the Principles of Hydrostatics is forced to run into the Sea to restore the Equilibrium: It is by the Strength of the Banks, the Force of the Engines, and the Goodness of the Outfall, that a Fenn must be drained. Now, I affirm that planting Aquatics upon Banks in the Fenn will not strengthen them, but destroy them.

All Vermin in a Fenn are fond of a Bank; it is high Ground, and therefore dry and comfortable for them in the Winter, for which Reason they are always full of Moles, and particular Kinds of Rats and Mice, with long Noses, call'd Field Mice and Rats, and abundance more Animals, which breed incessantly; and make Holes and Burrows through the Banks in all Directions. One Kind of these Rats builds his House so commodious, that it is worth while to relate the Ingenuity of this little Free Mason: He begins by making a Hole in the Top of the Bank, and after a Labyrinth of many Windings and Turnings, he finishes all, by making another towards the Bottom of the Bank close to the Water's Edge; by that Means he extends his Territories from the Top of the Bank to the Bottom, and has a Supply of fresh Water, without being seen by the Enemy, who is continually upon the Watch for him. Owls, Buzzards, Kites, Ravens, Carrion Crows, and other Birds of Prey in the Fenn, always frequent the Banks in the Evening, and if the Grass is kept low by Cattle, they will destroy most of the Vermin upon them.

But then we must not plant Trees upon them, as they will be the finest Cover imaginable for those Rats; Trees will not only hide them from the Sight of the Birds of Prey, but will likewise hinder those Birds from darting down upon them when they have got a Sight of them.

I remember, near eighteen Years ago, several Sorts of Aquatics were planted upon the Banks in the Fenns near Thorney-Abbey; the Consequence was, the Roots of the Trees served for Timber for the Houses of these Vermin, and the Branches were a Shelter from the Birds of Prey, by which Means they were full of Holes, thro' which the Water used to run back again to the Lands as fast as the Engines threw it out; for which Reason the Trees were ordered to be grubbed up, by the principal Engineer.

There is nothing which strengthens a Bank like a good Covering of Grass, close eat by Cattle; for if once Water penetrates through the outside Coat of a Bank, it is not in the Power of Aquatics to hinder it from tearing the Earth away with it. If Aquatics are planted any where, they ought to be at some Distance before the Bank, in order to keep the Lash of Water from wearing it away.

XXX

That those who lived Two Thousand Years ago, were larger than the present Race of Mankind.

We are obliged to the Poets for this Patagonian System. Their Fictions of Titan and Briareus, and the whole Fraternity of Giants, is a Fable which conveys a Moral: The Giants, upon attempting to scale the Walls of Heaven by heaping Mountains one upon another, are repelled by Jupiter's Thunder, made Prisoners, and bound under those Mountains upon which they made the Attempt. The Moral of the Fable is only this, that it is impossible for any Force to oppose the Omnipotent. Not to dispute whether the Ancients were of Opinion, that at the Creation of the World all the Animals were of a gigantic Size, or what might be their Sentiments about that Matter; it is certain that there has been an Opinion among Men, in all Ages, that the Time in which they themselves lived, produced Men of less Stature than those who lived some Time before them. This is a Persuasion which the Poets all encouraged, as it suited their Purpose; nothing being so great an Enchantment, to the Mind of a poetical Reader, as to be struck with the Marvellous.

When Virgil makes Turnus throw a large Stone at Æneas, he tells us, that it was such a Stone as twelve Men of his degenerate Age could scarce have carried upon their Shoulders.

 
Nec plura effatus, saxum circumspicit ingens:
Saxum antiquum ingens, campo quod forte jacebat,
Limes agro positus litem ut discerneret arvis.
Vix illud lecti bis sex cervice subirent,
Qualia nunc hominum producit corpora tellus.
 

A Person who reads this Passage, and really believes that Men were larger in Æneas' Time than in Virgil's, reasons thus with himself: "The Works of Nature degenerate: Those who lived in Æneas's Time, were larger than those who lived in Virgil's; and those who lived in the Time of Virgil, were larger than those who live now."

With regard to those who lived in Æneas's Time, we cannot indeed have any positive Proof to the contrary; but it is not impossible to prove, that the generality of those Romans who lived in Virgil's Time, were not so tall as the present Inhabitants of Great Britain are at this Day.

The English in general are a tall People; we are obliged to a Mixture of Saxons and Danes for our Stature. A curious Observer may discover a great deal of the Dane in many of the English, not only from their Names, but likewise from their Features and Complexions. Those People who have straight Hair between a white and a red, and have fine Skins, but withall a fierce Countenance, seem to be of Danish Extraction. It is not difficult, neither, to trace the Saxon in many of our Nation; such as are tall and lusty, and of a peaceable and quiet Demeanor till they are provoked, and with nothing very brisk in their Countenances, seem to have had Saxon Ancestors. Not to dwell long upon this, as it is certain that England has been over-run by the Danes and Saxons (whom it would be prudent not to speak ill of, lest we should abuse some of our own Relations) we will return to our Subject.

There is no Cause to apprehend that the Works of Nature degenerate in the least, as it is a Supposition which is repugnant to all the Observations which may be made upon the Generation of Animals. Any one who has bred Horses, Dogs, or Poultry, must have observed, that instead of degenerating, they always improve upon his Hands, unless he opposes Nature, which seems to struggle hard against a Stagnation, by confining the Breed too long in the same Family.

We have two Reasons, then, to suppose that the present Inhabitants of Great Britain are larger in Stature than the old Romans were, viz. because they are the Posterity of a taller People, and because the Breed is so much crossed.

But we beg Leave to offer a Reason why it may be apprehended that the Ancients were not larger in Stature than the Moderns, which seems to carry along with it something which has very much the Air of a Proof.

Whoever observes the Size of the Remains of those People who lived in the Time of the old Romans, or before that Time, will find, that they are no larger in their Dimensions than the Remains of those who died fifty Years ago. I have seen Abundance of Stone Coffins, which, as they are found in a Place which has all the manifest Signs of having been a Roman Camp, both in respect of it's advantageous Situation, the Name of the present Town, which is Caster, the Roman Coin which is constantly found there, the Urns in which the Coin is found, the Inscriptions cut in Cedar in the Coffins, the Stones of a Bridge, which may be felt with a Sprit, at the Bottom of the River, at the Back of an Enclosure, which is called the Castle Ground to this Day; all these are Indications of a Roman Camp, and may be seen near the great North Road between Stilton and Stamford; where the Curious, by a proper Application, may have a Pocket full of Roman Coin for a Shilling. Indeed, whether these Stone Coffins, which are found in this Camp, contained the Bodies of Romans, no one can positively determine, especially as the Romans generally burnt their Dead, if they had a convenient Opportunity: However, as they are found in a Roman Camp, upon the same Spot where the Coin is found, it is enough to make one think that they are Roman Coffins, and that the Romans did sometimes bury their Dead; nevertheless, we leave that to the Determination of the Curious. – Of whatever Nation their Contents were, the Marks of great Antiquity are strong upon them; and we can assure the Reader, that none of them were ever troubled with Remains of a Patagonian.

But these are not the only Reliques by which we may form our Judgments; numberless Libraries and Repositories in this Kingdom afford us Instances of the Size of the Ancients: We have several Egyptian Mummies which seem to be of very ancient Standing, and must have contained the Bodies of Men of less Stature than the present English.

Upon the whole, then, we have just Cause to conclude, that in all Ages of the World, the Egyptians and Romans were in general of the same Size with the present Inhabitants of those Countries.

It must nevertheless be allowed, that Luxury and Debauchery, which are the Concomitants of Wealth, do very much tend to decrease the Stature of the Inhabitants of those Cities which have long continued in that State. To which we may apply this Philosophical Maxim, When any Thing is so small as to be of no Consequence to the Point in Hand, it is considered as Nothing. Those Cities which have acquired so much Wealth as to be able to commit such Excesses, are inconsiderable when compared to the Inhabitants of the whole Earth, therefore they are to be considered as nothing.

Besides, so great is the Caprice of Fortune, that even the most powerful State in the Universe, cannot presume to declare how soon a Period may be put to its Grandeur. But having said something upon this Subject before, we shall proceed to another Error.

XXXI

That Bleeding in May will preserve the Constitution against Illness during the ensuing Summer.

This Hereditary Whim has long been practised in many genteel Families in England.

Without consulting any of the Faculty, whose Blood is too thick, or whose too thin, who have got too much Blood in their Veins, or who too little, they send for some Six-penny Bleeder, who performs this Operation upon the whole Family every Year, on May-day in the Morning.

Not to examine into the Causes of Mortality in May, leaving that Task to those who are able to assign them, it will be sufficient to remark, that the weekly Bills generally contain more Deaths in May than in any Month throughout the whole Year.

We are sure to have a Fortnight of unwholesome agueish Weather in May; and one would think, that the common Proverbs which are made use of in the Country to that purpose, would be sufficient to deter a Person from losing any Blood at that Season of the Year.

It is not impossible, but the Preposessions which we have in Favour of the Charms of this Month, may proceed from a Perusal of the Latin Poets, or their Translators; whose Works are full of the various Beauties of the Spring. And very possibly, in Italy, where these Poets lived, that Part of the Spring may be pleasant and wholesome.

In England, we are all of us very sensible of the cold and wet Weather, which generally happens in this Month. And for my own Part, I must confess, that I think May not only the most dangerous, but likewise, upon the whole, the most disagreeable Part of the Year; and am quite certain, that if I was to be let Blood on May-day, I should have the Ague.

XXXII

That Negroes are not a Part of the Human Species.

This is a Creolian Error, imbibed partly by the Prejudice of Education, and partly by the compleat Slavery which these poor Wretches are so unfortunate as to undergo. The passive Appearance of these unhappy People at their Work, which sometimes resembles that of a Horse in a Mill, gives Master Tommy Sugar-Cane an Idea, which is the Cause of an Opinion, that a Negroe is Part of the Brute Creation, and therefore ought to be thrashed.

But indeed, Master Tommy, if I had the Care of thy Education, I would teach thee a more reasonable Way of Thinking.

Young Gentleman, you ought to consider that the Works of Nature are neither better nor worse either for your Approbation or Disapprobation of them. That Black is as good a Colour as White in itself; and that the Effect which particular Rays of Light have upon your Eye, is by no Means to determine the Beauty or Proportion of any Part of the Creation: And though your faithful Negroe does appear rude and uncultivated, that is owing to his Want of Education. Let him have Instructions in Music, you will find that his Genius is greater than your own; teach him to fence, his Activity and Stratagem will surprize you. In short, instruct him in any Science, and he will discover a Capacity.

Therefore, if you have read Mr. Locke, (and if you have not, I would advise you to fit out one of your Ships and make a Voyage in Quest of him) Mr. Locke will tell you, that it is the Understanding that sets Man above the rest of sensible Beings, and gives him all the Advantage and Dominion which he has over them. And in another Place the same Author will tell you, that it is a wrong Connection of Ideas which is the great Cause of Errors: These are his Words, This wrong Connection in our Minds of Ideas, in themselves loose and independent one of another, has such an Influence, and is of so great Force to set us awry in our Actions, as well moral as natural Passions, Reasonings, and Notions themselves; that perhaps there is not any one Thing that deserves more to be looked after. This is the very Case with Master Tommy Sugar-Cane; a wrong Connection of Ideas have lead him into this Error, concerning his poor Negroe; he has connected the Ideas of Horse, Slave, and Negroe, so strongly together in his Mind, that it is not in his Power to separate them again. And I am credibly informed by those who understand it, that there is as much Pleasure in whipping a Negroe, as in driving a Phæton and Pair.

XXXIII

That Negroes are the Descendants of Cain, and that the Colour of their Skins is that Mark which was set upon Cain after killing Abel.

This is a very pretty ingenious Thought of some one, who was doubtless in love with his own Complexion. I have heard it affirmed by some with such Warmth, that it seemed in vain to reason with them about it.

Before we can have any Grounds for such an Affirmation, it will be necessary to prove that it is a Disgrace to have a dark Complexion; for, if it is no Disgrace to have a dark Complexion, then there can be no Badge or Mark of Infamy in being black; if it is a Disgrace to have a dark Complexion, then the Way of Reasoning must be this: The Irish and Scotch having fine Skins, are better than the English; the English and French, than the Italians and Spaniards; the Italians and Spaniards, than the Algerines; and so on, till we come to the Line. To me, this seems so absurd, that I must beg Leave to quit the Subject, till some one has convinced me, that a white Horse is better than a black one.

XXXIV

That Love is nothing but Concupiscence to a high Degree, or that Love and Lust are the same Thing.

Love is a Passion, which, though we read of it in the Classics, is but seldom experienced in these Northern Climates.

I never met with a North-countryman who would allow that there is any Difference between Love and Lust, and even in the Southern Parts of the Kingdom it is but slightly felt; what little we have of it in England, serves only to make Diversion for the Girls, one among another, and does not often produce any Thing of bad Consequence. But in Southern Climes the Effects of it are violent, as well as much more frequent. The desperate Actions which our Tragedies are full of, will appear more natural, if we consider what Country we are in during the Time of the Play.

In England, we should esteem a Person, who killed himself for the Love of one of inferior Birth and Fortune, but a very silly Fellow; whereas in Spain or in Italy, to fall upon a Sword for a beautiful Woman, is looked upon as a certain Indication of a great Soul, and as a Proof that the Heart of the Enamoured was possessed of a Sentiment unknown to the Minds of the Vulgar. Not to dwell upon the many Instances, which have happened both among the Ancients and Moderns, of People who have died for Love, I shall just make a little Enquiry into the Nature of that Disorder, for so it may be called, since it sometimes proves fatal.

That Affection which is called Love, seems to be a Fever, not only in the Mind, but an actual Fever, attended with the Symptoms of that Disorder; and differs from all others in this Particular, it is what no Physic can cure. The Symptoms of it are much like those of that Distemper, which the East-Indians sometimes die of, when they pine for their native Country.

If this is the Case, Love is so far from being another Term for Lust, that it rather opposes that Desire, which is generally the Concomitant of Health.

The Heart is capable of a Wound from this little mischievous Urchin, before Maturity arrives; for the Truth of which I appeal to every one who has Sensibility enough, to be capable of receiving the Impression of Love, whether he never found himself electrified by a fine Lady, when he was about the Age of thirteen.

To conclude: If I hear a Person very positive that Love and Lust are the same Thing, I take it for granted, that his Nerves are so coarse and callous, that nothing less than the Stroke of a Blacksmith's Hammer can possibly have any Effect upon him.

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12+
Litres'teki yayın tarihi:
27 eylül 2017
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121 s. 2 illüstrasyon
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