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6

And Krupskaya survived not only Inessa, but also the “immortal” Ilyich himself. Even a simple proletarian could lose his head, not like the leader of the world revolution.

Her rapprochement, her approach to the baton family, was a secret joy for all the members of the clan. A secret decision was made to remain silent and admire.

But one day, two months later, she felt that something was wrong and was forced to seek medical help. The doctors carefully examined the patient and stated with a malicious smile: you have syphilis, but it is not yet in the advanced form. We need to start treatment immediately.

With tears in her eyes, she returned home and did not find her legal spouse in Ilyich’s office, – asked:

– Volodya, where did you get syphilis? Before I met you, I was healthy, and now I have this terrible disease. Are all geniuses syphilitic? Nadezhda Konstantinovna was checked by doctors?

– Nadenka and I haven’t slept in the same bed for a long time. I have her as a party comrade, “Lenin burst out laughing. He gave Inessa a snakelike smile, then found Nadia studying mordychai’s Capital (Marx), and said:

– Comrade Nadia, not a step from here, do not leave the Capital open, do not leave it, do not come to me, I have an important conversation with members of the French delegation…to spread the ideas of Marxism. Work on the study of “Capital” our father Mordica-Marx… on fresh air. There is no wind, no rain, the garden bench is empty, it is waiting for you.

Nadia bowed her head and obediently left. The leader burst out laughing, then embraced Inessa and with revolutionary pathos began to explain the methods of fighting syphilis, which were equated with the methods of fighting capitalism.

– I don’t care about your capitalism or even your Mordechai Marxism: you gave me an incurable disease. In “Capital” Mordecha Marx does not say anything about syphilis and how to deal with it, – said Inessa Armand.

– Nadenka, I’m sorry, my dear Inessochka, as soon as the world revolution occurs, we will take up syphilis. A doctor gave me a thousand gold rubles as a bribe and told me that the more often we sin in bed, the more syphilis will recede further and further. This is true. I feel much better after meeting you. Therefore, let us give up relying on bourgeois doctors, and we will meet more often on the bed of love, give ourselves more warmly to each other, and thus, perhaps long before the world revolution begins, we will be cured naturally.

Lenin spoke pathetically and convincingly. Inessa had no choice but to agree with the opinion of her lover, who passionately proved the truth of his view of the problem, and she obediently, imitating Nadia, said:

“Have it your way, genius of evil. Let’s go to your bedroom.

“To our bedroom, the bedroom of the proletariat,” Lenin corrected, and burst out laughing. – As soon as we defeat these goose fools, I will issue a decree on free love, let young people walk around our cities in the Nude: everyone will hold their partner by the breast, and she will hold his twig and both will be happy – that’s what our revolution, my revolution, will give these fools.

And he laughed again, even though Inessa wasn’t naked yet.

This wild laughter, called Homeric laughter by Lenin’s colleagues and followers, chilled Inessa’s soul, and therefore she was always submissive and silent with her chosen one.

One day, both colleagues, infected with the proletarian disease, went to the mountains, taking Nadia with them as a porter and cook. She carried a huge samovar and a heavy bag of groceries.

Later, outstanding scientists of the Soviet country will explore every path where the foot of the leader, his friend Inessa Armand and the porter Nadezhda Konstantinovna set foot. Hundreds of dissertations will be written on this topic, and"stupid” doctors of pseudoscience will fool young people studying at universities in the country: it is Lenin himself, the genius of all mankind, who strolled through the mountains of Switzerland with his beloved wife and a party comrade.

7

The Soviet government came out with a proposal to Finance the installation of monuments on every path where the foot of a genius set foot.

Do you understand, dear comrades? the Swiss mountains are completely different and the greenery is different. This is the Marxist greens. There is a special smell, a special aroma, I was lucky enough to be in those places when I was collecting material for writing a dissertation, one or the other declared

future stupid-ass Professor. There is even the leaves of the alfalfa smell of Marxism.

And the students were supposed to listen with their mouths open and even applaud.

 
                                       * * *
 

The October revolution was a success not only because of Lenin, but also because of Germany, which so generously financed the Russian Jacobins, without giving any importance to the national composition of the most ardent revolutionaries. Ironically, it was Lenin’s heirs who defeated Germany and divided it into two parts; if the Marxists are to be believed, then the CPSU, not the Russian people, won the victory over Hitler. The Russian wine is also viewed the intelligentsia, which, without knowing it, long before the October revolution called Russia to the axe, organized terror throughout the country in the name of one thing: the change of the power of the tsars to…some democratic power. It was the intelligentsia that awakened the poor and destitute to a sense of equality, freedom, fraternity, and prosperity. The intelligentsia, as it were, prepared Russia for a coup, and then paid for it with their lives.

If Lenin’s brother Alexander and several other terrorists were hanged by the Tsar, then the genius of the Russian people, Lenin, shot and rotted in concentration camps millions of innocent people. As they say: what we fought for, we ran into. Russian patrons also kept up with the intelligentsia, they sponsored terrorists, supported the Leninist terrorist group, and treated revolutionaries as representatives of Russia’s upper class. They, too, paid with their lives for their clumsiness. In this regard, the October revolution is a perfect example of future coups for the sake of seizing power. And Lenin’s camarilla pursued one goal – to seize power, to replace concrete benches with luxurious chairs in which you can drown in foam.

 
                                       * * *
 

During walks in the company of Inessa Armand, the leader showed impatience, he wanted not only to hug and kiss Inessa, but also… something inside pushed him to explore strawberries and, without wasting time, sent his wife Nadenka away. She would go without a murmur to investigate where the path led, or to find out what kinds of berries grew in the foothills of a particular peak. At the end of some time, the party comrade, having fulfilled the party’s instructions, returned with a report on the work done. And at this time Lenin, having mastered Inessa, shouted: Yes ZD…a-mi…new …evolution!

Nadezhda Konstantinovna finally realized that there was another woman in their family, Volodya’s new civil wife.

Inessa once asked the leader of the proletariat in a moment of rest after bodily pleasures:

– Who are you, what is your nationality? You are so similar to an Asian Jew: wide-cheeked, bow-legged, or rather short-legged, eyes at the moment of excitement a little protruding, red, always angry and aggressive, even in bed, this animal aggression manifests itself. Tell me about yourself. Of course, if you can.

what he is a representative of all Nations, and I have a little bit of Russian blood in my veins, more Jewish, German, Kalmyk, Tatar. As you can see, I am an internationalist. Much of my Jewish blood made me a genius. My mother is Jewish and a little German. Father-Kalmyk. Jews are smart people, they should be given responsible, intelligent work, and Russian fools should work hard with a pick and shovel.

That’s why you’re surrounded by Jews. Are you going to make a world revolution with them?

– You guessed right. Although I plan to introduce one Georgian to the Central Committee, I think it is Dzhugashvili. Recently, he robbed a Bank in Tiflis and sent three thousand gold pieces to support members of our Central Committee. He practically bought the position. I promised to add more money to the party’s cash register.

“It’s immoral,” Inessa said.

“Morally, everything that serves the cause of the world revolution,” the leader said hotly. – I will cut out half of Russia in the name of the victory of the socialist revolution. World revolution. And Russia, the Soviet people, as Bronstein claims, is just the dung of history. We will use it to make an experiment.

– You don’t like Russia?”

– I hate her. And, in General, what is morality? Do you know what morality is? Morality is a bourgeois substance and must be eliminated. As soon as the working masses overthrow tsardom in Russia, morality will be finished once and for all.

“Well! maybe you’re right.

Genius is always right, hack to death is on your nose, sweetie.

8

– I have to go to France, where I have children. I’ll be back in two months.

– Then I will sit down for the work “What are the friends of the people and how they fight against the social Democrats”. Arrange for the publication of my work of genius in France.

“I need money.”

“Even a million.” The working masses actively support their leaders. Dzhugashvili still has to bring a bag of money. Information has already been received. We must Rob the landlords and capitalists and help the working masses. And we, as you know, are representatives of the working masses.

– And if your killer Doesn’t bring the money, what then?”

– I will write to my mother, she will share her pension, she has a good pension. If she lives, I will introduce her to the Central Committee of the party for financing the world revolution.

– You’re not a son.

The revolutionary Inessa did not have time to enjoy the conversation with her brilliant Burr lover, who had already given her a piquant disease, she did not yet know that he, this lover, would send her to the South and there poison her a few years before his death.

Inessa was the first to see a crowd of men and women on the path, carrying large bales on their shoulders, folding chairs, and a folding table.

“Mr. Lunin, your order is complete,” said the man in front with a bag full of bottles with champagne and cognac. “Vee owes two thousand francs. I ask you now.

– My party comrade Nadia will pay you off, here she is already coming, not a single mushroom has been found, the fool, goes empty-handed. Hey, comrade Nadia, count out two thousand francs to these morons and take part in preparing a dinner in the mountains of Switzerland. It’s just fabulous, isn’t it, Inessa? What is syphilis compared to this nature? Rubbish. Now we will have a hearty lunch like proletarians, drink like Russian fools, and begin treatment. I feel able for five more sessions.

Inessa frowned, smiled sourly, and said:

“It is commendable that you are such a giant. You are not only a great revolutionary, but also an irreplaceable lover. I’m sorry you got it from those damned prostitutes. And as for treatment in bed, not here. Let’s wait for night and..the revolutionary Inessa is at your disposal.

At this time, the sheep was already being cut up for shish kebab. Nadyezhda Konstantinovna hovered around her husband, wanting to remind him that she was still a legal spouse and that the table should have not two chairs, but three – for the leader, wife and mistress. It was written in her sightless eyes. Lenin did not like his wife’s behavior. He narrowed his eyes and ordered:

– Tovah…“Nadia, go to the revolutionary headquarters. According to my calculations, two revolutionaries are waiting for me there – Dzhugashvili and Ter-Petrosyan. More than a week has passed since the expropriation of Tbilisi banks. Tova … the search must deliver bales with three hundred thousand gold rubles. We have katast… ofically, there is not enough money. Three hundred thousand rubles in gold is several million francs.

Inessa listened with her mouth open. She was once again convinced that her chosen one is a great, wise man. And that, syphilitic, is too insignificant a flaw in comparison with his data as a national leader.

– Volodya, I am amazed at your wisdom. A few million francs is so easy to get, only you can do it. I really don’t understand where your party comrades were able to get such sums. Did they Rob banks?

“No, they took the loot from the people on my personal instructions. Hey, comrade Nadia, invite my associates Kamo and Stalin after you accept their bags of gold rubles. We’ll treat them. Put a table at a little distance, so that the smoke won’t come at us, and so that we can talk to comrade Armand about the revolution in France.

The chief’s order was obeyed. Volodya sat Inessa down opposite, stared at her with his gimlet eyes, and she shuddered and lowered her head.

– Well, what are your questions, comrade Inessa?

“I have many questions for you, Volodya. Will you give half a million to support the French revolutionaries, to whom I have the honor to belong? I still have five children, and I’m not very well dressed myself.

“No problem,” said Lenin. “Not half a million, but a lot more.” I’ve thought about it before. My mother must also send me a considerable sum. The translation will be here until the tenth.

“Mother?” you continue to Rob your own mother for your own ends and..going to a brothel? If your colleagues Rob the Russian Treasury and bring you bags of gold, you could help your mother yourself, and even how. No, I think I’ll refuse your help.

9

Lenin greeted the last words with laughter, because the mother of this little plyugavenkogo person, was no more than a party comrade. And he robbed her until 1916, that is, until her death. It became a symbol of immorality on her grave.

“You are naive, comrade Inessa. My mother also serves the cause of mi … ovoi …evolution, so she voluntarily gives me the last penny, knowing well that I am the leader of the world revolution. In addition, significant assistance has come from the Russian tycoon, Russian fool Savva Morozov. But, unfortunately, the frost killed herself back in 1905, our fear of expropriation. And rightly so. Morozov had left heirs. His nephew Schmidt also took his own life on our advice, and there were the heiress girls left. Our comrades of Andriani and Taratuta sent me to Russia. They will marry young chickens and thus all the wealth of their father Schmidt will go to the Fund of the party. And I, the leader of the world revolution, am in charge of the party’s Fund. So take me for what I am, I’m all in front of you, as in the palm of your hand.

“How much do you expect to get if you inherit Schmidt’s estate?”

“About ten million francs,” said the chief proudly. “But that’s not all. Comrade Gorky also helps us. He has considerable royalties for published works; he shares them with me.

“How much do you get for your work of genius?”

“No one’s buying them yet. You see, geniuses are not recognized immediately, but when I free these Russian fools from tsardom, my works will be published in millions of copies. Let them read, study every letter, learn how to live. Fifty, one hundred, two hundred volumes of my works will be collected by this time. They will supersede from counters of shops of all sorts Dostoevsky, Gumilev, Turgenev and Tolstoy even.

“You wrote that Tolstoy is a mirror of the Russian revolution,” Inessa said. “You never know what I wrote about. I, of course, will not forbid Tolstoy, but all the works of Tolstoy are not worth a single page of my work” What to do?”. I believe that the people themselves will turn away from Tolstoy in the direction of my works of genius. And Dostoevsky has no place in Russian literature. This is a bourgeois writer.

– But it is very popular in Europe.

– Spit. Europe, like Russia, will become socialist. We will liberate Europe.

“I dream of it, too. But today I see: you are a rich revolutionary. See how you turn into a capitalist.

“But that’s not all. I have in mind Ermakov from Syzran, I approached him with tearful letter about support of the party. I will write to him that the only party that can bring happiness to the Russian people is in distress: there are no funds not only for the publication of the Newspapers Iskra and Pravda, but also for a plate of soup for the leader of the world proletariat-ha … ha… ha! And it will help. Later, when the revolution is complete and we come to power, I will shoot them all without trial – all, all: priests, capitalists, entrepreneurs, landowners, and him, the scoundrel, too. The gallows will be placed in the squares so that these Russian fools will see and honor us, the Bolsheviks.

“Volodya, that’s enough. You’re a Jacobin, that’s not good, “Inessa said, and downed her glass of champagne. “Let’s talk about something else.

“About what, comrade Inessa?” Lenin asked, sipping an expensive French cognac.

“I’m suffering from this damned syphilis. You gave me this sore and let’s think about how to get rid of it.

Inessa looked at him with helpless eyes, and when the little trickles of tears ran down her cheeks, she did not wipe them with the smart handkerchief that lay on the table instead of a napkin.

– You, comrade Inessa, do not have sufficient revolutionary courage, weak, and should be happy that even such a damned bourgeois disease as syphilis, gave you not just anyone, not some bourgeois, but genius leader of the world revolution, Lenin. The imperialists specifically sent me a woman with this disease, they are trying to get back at me for exposing them, for raising the masses against them, but they did not succeed. Why didn’t it work? because I am a staunch revolutionary. And as soon as I come to power, I will eliminate this disease, and all those who are ill with this disease, I will hang, shoot. This will be the verdict of the revolutionary court. Here you are, you damned imperialists, a cuckoo to you, not a victory over genius, genius cannot be defeated. Even time has no power over him.

10

Parvus did almost everything for Lenin to take power. If there were no Parvus, there would be no Lenin. Parvus could not have imagined that in his effort, in a successful Scam to persuade the German leadership to allocate huge amounts of money for the revolution to a little-known clerk, Lenin would see a subterfuge, a desire to push him away from the Supreme power and basely betrayed his patron.

Inessa, like any sweet and weak woman, froze with the glass in her hands, she was overcome by fear, mixed with love for this man, the glass fell out of her hands and broke into pieces.

“What’s wrong with you, Inessa?” are you ill? Now I will read you a Chapter from my work” What to do?” it will make you feel better. The revolutionary spirit … it encourages, it leads to victory, and victory is the screams, the whistling of bullets, the flow of blood, the roar of the crowd. And the crowd… that… flock of sheep. What a thrill, it’s hard to imagine! Just don’t think that I stole the title of my work from Chernyshevsky. He, this novel, so-so. Rus: to the axe, and there is nothing else there. I just recently read his opus, so through one page. I reached the axe and threw it. Chernyshevsky’s a sucker. We don’t need an axe, but a large-caliber weapon. I read the title once and thought: why don’t I write a political novel “What to do?” Want me to read it?” There are outstanding places there, where is Leo Tolstoy or Chernyshevsky? This is very important, sit down, listen! Well, I ask you, and my request is like an order from the mouth of the leader of the world revolution.

“N-no!” I was afraid, sorry for the moment of weakness. Just tell me: do I also fall under this list of patients to be hanged or shot?

– What kind of shooting, Inessa?” Sometimes execution is replaced by hanging, especially when there are not enough bullets and guns. Let’s do this. Read my work” What to do?” and then go to Paris, see the professors, have them treat you. This syphilis, as you call it, was sent to me by the Czar’s gendarmes. I will hang this king! no, I’ll put him alive in a barrel of acid.

– Yes, I tried, I read one page of your work, but, I’m sorry, there is such gibberish, such a clumsy syllable, who can read it to the end?

– Well, there are separate places… you know, they don’t belong to me. Gershon Apfelbaum set it up. After his eighth glass of beer, he began to scribble. The fact is that we are writing this outstanding work together, together, so to speak. And this is very important. You know, we always get together with him, genius people have genius fights, and Gershon is the master of these fights. I even hit him on the back with a rolling pin, and it turns out that he likes it: he sometimes cries, then screams with joy. And it is in my brilliant work tries to introduce these squabbles as much as possible. You can avoid them. By the way, Gershon wants to become a Zinoviev, a Russian man, which means that he must break with the Jews. He is ready to betray his faith, his name…for thirty pieces of silver, and all for the sake of a world revolution. So you, after reading at least the first part of my brilliant work, go to France. In the meantime, calm down, be as courageous as any friend of a great man.

– Where will I get funds for treatment, Volodya?

“I’ll give you ten thousand francs,” said Lenin. “You want fifty.” You have the right to help… you contribute to the good cheer of the leader of the world revolution. You have no one to take it from, and I take it from my mother, and she sends me part of her pension, and it will continue until she gives her soul to God. Oh, forgive me until she gives me her soul, because I, Lenin, will become an earthly God as soon as the world revolution is complete, as soon as we free all countries from the yoke of capitalism.

“Ten thousand.”. . Yes, this amount is enough for one reception.

Lenin scratched his head. His mind worked clearly and always correctly. There are two options for helping Inessa: either he will write to his mother – send all his pension to the world revolution, mother, or a party friend and his legal wife, Nadia, will hurry to get the inheritance after their parents died. But when will they die? contribute to it. Maybe they should send Kobu to kill them, or rather, put them in bed and cover them with bags of salt so that they don’t freeze, the world revolution can’t wait.

Inessa started to say something, but he held up a finger, which meant: shut up Inessa. Both of them